29 | hold on, I still want you

IT is her birthday.

Aahana didn't wake up with a smile or frown. She was happy, yes, but not much because it had just been a day since Everett walked away without saying goodbye and a little part of her missed them being together. She had known what they had was temporary—once in a lifetime experience at best and when she asked him to go away, she was doing them both a good thing.

Yesterday, when she woke up alone in the hotel room, she didn't know what to feel. She was glad that he listened to her and went to chase his dream. She was glad he didn't wake her up to say goodbye because she was sure she would cry. She was glad that on her way back home, she succeeded in almost thinking about everything else but him.

What she wasn't glad about was that she was going to feel a little upset for a while. Maybe longer than a little while.

The only positive thing so far is that her parents didn't ground her on her birthday. But she is grounded for next week. Her parents were upset, mad, and relieved when they saw her. Her Ma showered her with kisses and her Papa was with her the whole day. He even tucked her to bed last night. She wasn't sure why they were doing that—afraid that she might run again or they missed her. Her Aai, on the other hand, looked happy. Aahana told her about everything apart from her feelings towards Everett. She didn't want to relive those moments again. The more she thought about him, the more difficult it would be for her to move on. And she didn't dare mention Kavya.

Aahana stepped out of her bed. The door flung open and Rae leapt onto her best friend. She hugged her tightly, almost making it difficult for Aahana to breathe.

"Oh, my God, Ana! Happy birthday, butterfly!" Rae broke the hug after two minutes. Aahana cracked a smile, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"Thanks, Rae. How was the trip? Weren't you going to come tomorrow?" She asked.

"Yeah, but how could I miss my best friend's birthday! And I want to hear everything about Peakview." Rae sat on her bed. "How was that guy? Was he cute? Hot?"

She sighed. "He was..." she said bitterly. "Everything I imagined him to be."

"Oh, my Gosh," Rae exclaimed. "You like him a lot."

"What?" How did she know? Was it that obvious?

"I thought it was a one-time summer fling but it wasn't, was it?" Rae stood up and clutched both of her shoulders. "You like him. You like him!"

There was no point in disagreeing.

She nodded and lowered her eyes. "Yeah. More than I want to."

"Why do you sound so sad? Isn't that nice? You're finally dating someone because you have real feelings for them!" Rae squeezed her shoulders lightly.

"We aren't dating, Rae. He had to go away."

"Go away?"

A tear escaped her eye as she began to explain everything to Rae. She told her about everything. From the beach where she ruined his photo to the night, they kissed for the first and last time. Rae had the same pitiful look in her eyes that Aahana once hated but she didn't mind today. She was grateful that Rae was there with her.

Rae tried to console her but it wasn't working.

"How about we throw an actual party with booze to help distract you?" Rae suggested.

"But I was going to spend my day with the people who care about me—Ma, Papa, Aai and you."

"They will care about you regardless of whether you spend time with them or not. What you need right now, butterfly, is to distract yourself. Party could help that."

"Um...okay?"


The only reason Aahana agreed for the party was that she could slip out anytime without anyone noticing. She convinced her parents to go to the movies and have a dinner date while she would party in the backyard. Her parents weren't happy with her decision but agreed anyway since she promised to keep the volume low so that Aai won't have any trouble.

When she returned from Peakview, she expected them to yell at her, to give her the worst punishment or at the very least, take away her phone but strangely enough they did none of those things. Instead, when Aahana rang the doorbell and Papa opened the door and called out for her mother—Ma rushed to the door and as soon as her eyes met Aahana's, her knees crashed on the floor, burying her face into her hands. Aahana rushed to her mother and hugged her. "I am so sorry, Ana. I am sorry for being so controlling, for not giving you the freedom to live. I promise I didn't want–" Aahana lifted her chin up. "Ma, don't cry, please." Tears in both of their eyes. "I won't leave you again. I am not Kavya. Never have been." Papa sat next to them, hugging his wife and his daughter. "We never wanted you to be her. We want you to be Aahana Mehta—whatever makes you...you. We never wanted to make you feel restrained." They cried together and hugged each other. And Aahana knew they could be better parents. And she could be a better daughter.

And they loved her enough.

"The makeup and hair are done." Rae brushed Aahana's hair. "Now, go get dressed." Aahana slipped into her silver sequin dress that wrapped tightly around her body. It was beyond her comfort zone but she didn't care. She wore her silver high heels. Her short hair was curled and if she was being honest with herself, she liked what she looked like.

"Thanks, Rae."

Rae smiled. "Let's go downstairs. Everyone must be waiting."

Rae went first and asked the DJ to pause the music. Aahana was waiting for Rae to give her a sign. Rae clapped to gain everyone's attention. When all the eyes were on her, she started to get down the staircase.

"Hey, everybody!" She announced. "Give it up for the birthday girl Aahana!" Aahana smiled and came near the staircase. Everyone looked at her different looks. She smiled and began walking down the stairs. Her friends yelled happy birthday as she reached downstairs. "Now, let's move the party where it is supposed to be—in the backyard!" Rae said and everyone started to move to the backyard. On her way there, she was paused by many people who wished her.

"Happy birthday, ex-girlfriend," Corbyn whispered in her ear from behind before walking beside her.

"Thank you, ex-boyfriend." She smiled.

Rae appeared and rolled her eyes at Corbyn. "Ugh, you." She spat. "Pleasure not meeting you, Corbyn."

He smirked. "Same here. What's your name again? I'm sorry I always forget the names of the people that I don't care about." He chuckled and walked away.

Rae scoffed. "Out of all the people, why did you fake date him?"

"It wasn't my choice. It was your dare."

The sun was sinking in the ocean and she couldn't stop thinking about their last two days together. The music from the backyard was barely audible. The party was still going on and fortunately, no one had come looking for her. She needed this peace. And while she could never again find the home she found in Everett, she felt closest to him while watching the sunset.

She sat on the roof and started to stare at Arlo's room which was empty but her mind was on Everett. She took her phone out and surfed through her texts. Many people had wished her but not him. He hadn't saved her number and she hadn't saved his.

While checking out of the hotel, she had thought of taking his name from the hotel and considered texting him but she decided against it because she knew she wouldn't call him or text him just once. Before going to bed on their last night when Everett thought she was asleep so he kissed her cheek and whispered, "I like you, Aahana but I can't have you. And I want you to move on because there's no point in clinging to something you can't have." She didn't react. She just pretended to be asleep. They had made the right choice.

Hadn't they?

Her thoughts were interrupted when a notification popped up on her screen. The notification was from Everett's blog. He had published his blog on Peakview. Aahana snickered when she read that he had titled his blog with 'Peakview–the town of sunsets, pina coladas, and...people.'

For the first time ever, I wanted to stay. The blog began. And it was because of her. The sun. My sun. But I can never call her mine, can I? She didn't belong with me. She belongs with the clouds, the sky—but not mine, never mine. I have always loved the feeling of sun rays on my skin and...

Aahana couldn't read. Her eyes had begun to pool with water. She wasn't ready to look at herself through his eyes. Because he was saying goodbye to her in his blog and she didn't want to deal with that right now. But how did he unlock her phone?

"I had cracked your phone's password in the first guess." A voice muttered from behind. Aahana widened her eyes and turned around to see Everett climbing onto the roof. She was surprised but wasted no minute to jump on him. He hugged her back and took a deep breath, smelling her scent.

"Everett, what are you doing here? You had left. How...how even...?" She fumbled. Everett scratched the back of his neck and sat beside her on the roof.

"I had, but I couldn't stop thinking about you. On my drive, all I thought about was you—what you must be doing, whether you left for Oakside or not, what you were thinking. I didn't even say goodbye. And I...I..." He trailed off, short for words.

"I couldn't stop thinking about you, too. I had started to doubt if it was even right to let you go." Everett held her hands and squeezed them.

"No...no, please don't. I... I want to make us work somehow. I can't think of you being with someone else. You are a part of my dream now. I want you in the future...my future. I want to go out on dates with you. I want to hold your hand and dance. I want to...I want you. You had asked me if anything ever made me want to stay." He held her face. "You make me want to stay. You make me want to come back."

Aahana hovered her body and sat on his lap, facing him. She circled her arms around his neck while playing with his hair. He draped his arms around her waist and held her tight, making sure she didn't fall off.

She leaned in and kissed his lips. "But what about that sponsorship?"

He grinned. "Don't worry, I got another one. It is a one year contract. They're sponsoring me to visit different parts of the world including India and write a blog featuring their hotel. It's one aim, two birds kind of situation. I could go find my brother."

"Oh, my God, Everett! That is great!" She hugged once again.

"Happy birthday, my sunshine. You look stunning, as always." He kissed her forehead. "I have a present for you." He buried his one hand in the pocket and took out a small box wrapped in yellow packing paper.

Excitedly, she ripped it open and saw two rings. One of them was thin and shaped like an arrow and the other one was thicker and it outlined the arrow in such a way that the thinner ring could fit in the thicker one.

"Promise rings," she whispered with a smile and looked at him. "I love them."

Everett smiled and took out the thinner ring. He extended his hand.

"Will you, Aahana Mehta, accept to be my girlfriend and wait for me to come back for you and only you?"

She chuckled and submitted her left hand to him. "Yes, yes. A hundred times yes." Everett smiled and slid the ring in her pinky finger which fit her perfectly. She took his ring out and extended her right hand.

"Will you, Everett Miller, accept to be my boyfriend and chase your dream and come back for me and only me?"

He smiled and she slid it through the same finger in his hand. They kissed once, twice and thrice before she twisted around and sunk. She rested her head on his chest while he held her.

"Is that the guy next door who you used to stare at?" Everett asked and pointed at Arlo whose back was staring at them. She nodded and they watched him as the boy dipped his paintbrush in black paint and stroked it violently on the white canvas.

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