Chapter Three

I sit down to do my school work. I'm starting to forget why I wanted to come to college. It's so hard. At last I finish the final problem and throw my school books away from me. I lay across my bed. I close my eyes briefly and sit up. My next class is in about an hour, so I take a shower and freshen up.

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I'm done with school for the day. I sigh into my salad that I'm eating for dinner. I'm alone. The only reason I eat salad is because everything else here isn't good. I don't like salad very much.

That salad is basically a metaphor for how the past few weeks have been going. I don't really have any friends. There are a few people in class I'm acquainted with, but it's hard to actually become friends with them when I can't hear them. I'm pretty sure they have tried to talk to me before, only to be seemingly ignored. I'm starting to dislike the fact that I'm deaf, but I don't want to randomly announce it to people because then they would think that I was some sort of attention seeking. That would be worse than just 'ignoring' them.

On the weekends, I finish all my schoolwork and mope. Not having friends is not fun. Trent sometimes comes by and visits me or invites me along with his friends, but it's still lonely. None of them know me or talk to me. Well, Kim talks to me. I guess that's good. I have a feeling it's only because she's dating Trent. I decide that moping is useless. I'll go on walks on the weekends. I enjoy going on long walks, so that is what I'm doing right now. As I'm walking, I see a lake right by the campus. I decide to walk there. I walk to the beach area, and it's beautiful. I sit on a bench. When I make it back to my dorm room, I feel refreshed. I go to sleep with a peaceful state of mind.

It's especially hard for me to not have friends because I can't get a job to fill the time. Maybe I can, but I'm still trying to think of one that I can do as a deaf person. I want to be able to do it well, even if I am deaf. I sigh as I sit on my bed. After getting ready for bed, I lay down. I'm on the brink of sleep. I think about various jobs I could apply for that I might still be good at. Eventually, I fall asleep, my thoughts failing me.

My eyes snap awake at a strange hour. I sit up groggily and look at my clock. It's three in the morning. I sigh as I lay back down, hoping for sleep to come back. It doesn't. After an hour of tossing and turning, I get up and take a shower. It's half past five when I'm finally ready for the day. I walk slowly down the halls of my dorm and out the door. I walk to the beach; the sun is just starting to rise when I get there. It's beautiful. I sit again on a bench, smiling dreamily at the beauty of it all. Everything is peaceful. I decide it will be okay to lay down for just a moment and close my eyes. I fall asleep.

I feel something cold against my cheeks. It is cold and wet. I open my eyes just to have them closed again from the same coldness. I force them open and realize I'm not in my bed. I quickly sit upright. I look around, confused. Instead of seeing anything of substance, I see blurry rain. I stand up and trip away from the bench. I try seeing through the pouring rain but fail. I let a frustrated scream out. Suddenly, I feel someone touch me from behind. I let out another scream, flying forwards out of fear. I fall straight to the sand. I turn around and look up at whoever had startled me. It's Trent. He holds his hand out and helps me up. He doesn't say anything, but he grabs onto my hand and practically drags me to my dorm room. He signs furiously at me.

"Get changed."

I grab new clothes, go to the bathroom, and change. I come out and look at Trent.

"What's wrong?"

"I've been looking for you. We were supposed to meet up for breakfast today."

"Oh. I'm sorry. I-I must have fallen asleep."

I feel out of it. How did I fall asleep on the bench? I look at my clock. It's one. My eyes widen. I missed a bunch of my classes today. What happened to me? I take a deep breath. I feel Trent's hands on my shoulders and I look at him. He talks to me with his hands still on my shoulders.

"What's wrong?"

"This isn't going too well for me." His face softens. He looks disappointed. "I don't know. I fell asleep on the bench at the beach. I think I might be a little sick. I think I'm going to take another shower and go to sleep."

He drops his hands from my shoulders and looks at me.

"Okay. This isn't over. We will talk about this later."

He pulls me in for a hug and walks out the door, leaving me alone. I shiver and go to take a hot shower. I will have to find a way to cover up the fact that I'm lonely here. I don't want Trent to feel bad or feel like he has to hang out with me all the time. He can't help me with every one of my problems. I need to figure some things out on my own.

I sluggishly make my way to my first class of the day. I walk in and sit down, staring at the teacher. She is giving a lecture on something. After several moments of staring into space, I notice the whole class is looking at me. My eyes widen. Why are they looking at me? What did I do? I look at the teacher's lips, but I can't tell what she's saying. My vision is too blurry. I blink rapidly and stand up. My stomach. I rush out of the classroom to try to find the bathroom. I don't make it. My stomach gives out in the middle of the hallway. The breakfast I had this morning is now on the floor. I sit down, feeling tired. I sit there for a few moments. I eventually go to the bathroom. I clean myself up and walk back to the hallway with a paper towel. I roll my eyes at my stupidity and take out my phone to text Trent. Here's another disadvantage of being deaf: I can't call people. I decide to video chat with him. It rings for a long time before he finally answers.

"Trent?"

He doesn't say anything at first, but I see his lips move slowly due to the bad internet connection.

"Nia? What's wrong?"

"I threw up all over the hallway."

"Oh no. Are you okay? Are you sick? Where are you? I'll come help you."

"I-uh-well, I'm at my class."

Why is my head so muddled?

"I have no clue where that is. Can you give me a hint?" I shake my head and respond to him, hopefully not confusing him. After a while of just sitting in a daze, Trent finally shows up.

"Trent?"

He rushes to me and stands in front of me, slowly lowering himself to a squat. He looks worried.

"Nia! What happened?"

"I think I'm sick. I don't know."

"Let's get this cleaned up. I'll be right back. Please stay here."

He stands up and walks away. I sit up straighter. Eventually, Trent comes back with someone to clean up the mess properly. I look at the poor soul remorsefully.

"I'm so sorry you have to clean this up. I'll help you. I just didn't hav-" He cuts me off.

"It's fine. You go ahead. I hope you feel better."

It's a good thing he is nice. As Trent and I walk to my dorm room, he asks me a question.

"Nia, do you have the stomach flu?"

"I don't know. Trent can you just take me..."

I trail off and look away from him so he can't speak to me. When we get to my dorm room, I lay across my bed once again. I go to the bathroom to shower. When I return from the shower, Trent is gone. I sigh and lay on my bed, wishing all of this would disappear.