im drunk but i feel held and i feel like im furthest from home but home isnt where i want to be, im in that backyard of someone else and he loves me and hates and hates and hates and his tears drowntheworld
he feels so much i know the water makes his lungs explode i know this yard and i know the grass less when its cut
i wont climb the fence, i dont want to go home i want all the blood he promises me and to not want the red stuff at all
i want to be what he calls me but i fear i cant feel a fucking thing and he yells and cries and begs and i sit and sit and sit and breathe Shallow small tiny
not to stir the air anymore than his anger does
because he will love me as long as he can but not the way i want
he wants to kill for me
i just want him to kiss me and be happy and be fine and be healed
he will fuck and be set aflame and be only himself and i will love him
in a different way that he loves me
anyway
i am in love
he is a protector of worlds