Chapter 35: Change

            Roric walked next to me, his eyes crinkling in concentration as I told him what had happened the night before. And then he was smiling, "It seems like you really did hear from God."

            "You think so?"

            "Well, don't act suspicious. I know that's what you believe. Your eyes haven't lit up like that since I've known you. I know that look. And I knew you'd heard from Him before you told me, Paul." Roric said gently.

            "How am I supposed to tell the difference between God and random voices?"

            "That's a very good question. Really, people should be cautious. You never know if Satan is trying to mess with you. People forget that it's not just all rainbows and lollipops. We are at war." He paused, "Well, the war is already won, but it's a war nonetheless. One that is still going on at this current time."

            "What do you suggest?"

            "Read the Bible. See how God talks. What He's like. What is good and what's not. He stays the same and won't change, so don't expect God to tell you it's ok to do something you know He's said no to. God doesn't insult people when He speaks. He's patient, kind, and loving." Roric nudged me, "But He also will get a bit gruff sometimes if you need it. Believe me, I've gotten the bluntness before."

            "I can't believe I actually believe the things you say." I said, feeling very far away as I thought.

            "I guess that's why it's time then." Roric murmured.

            "What?"

            "Your Salamence's brace comes off today, correct?"

            I thought back to Nurse Joy's last check up and the date she'd indicated, "Yes."

            "Well, God spoke to me last night as well."

            "And?" I asked suspiciously.

            "And Demi and I need to leave." He looked away as if looking at me was too much.

            "Why?"

            "I'm not sure, but Aaron is coming with us. At least for a while."

            "Why Aaron?"

            Roric stopped walking and inspected a tree trunk before looking at me, "That's what God wants. Aaron is the one who said he felt like we all needed to go to Lilycove."

            "Lilycove?" I repeated, trying to decipher why, "What would you do there?"

            "I don't know. We just need to go."

            "You're just going to go there?" My voice rose.

            Roric's eyes softened, "It wasn't just Aaron. I got a call from a group of friends saying they were in Lilycove this morning. That they felt like we needed to be there."

             "So what does that mean?"

            "Well, it looks like we're heading out tonight to find out." Roric stated simply.

            "Does Demi know?"

            "She does. I don't think she's taking leaving well. She wants to go where God wants us, but..."

            "I understand." I said quietly, "I suppose there's no real reason for us to stay here anymore if you're leaving."

            "I think that's your sign to move on too." Roric put a hand on my shoulder.

            "I suppose."

            "I don't think we should really ask for signs. It's more about trusting that God will let us know what we need to know when we need to know it, but He will make sure we're prepared and going where He wants."

            I was doubtful about that. Really, I didn't exactly want to go wherever God called me and just start preaching. Me, doing that? No. Seek and find. That was my goal right now.

            ...Yet I couldn't find if I didn't go to the right place to seek.

            I sighed, "This is complicated."

            "It really isn't. Once you learn, it makes more sense. Don't worry." Roric then slung his arm around my shoulders and started walking again. It felt very brotherly and I was actually very comfortable.

            "I don't know what I'm supposed to do now." I admitted.

            "You don't have to know everything. Just be guided." His arm around my shoulders wasn't heavy. My emotions were distracting me to the point where I wasn't paying attention to where we were going. I knew Roric was steering me gently.

            After a few breaths, I knew today would be spent in good byes, "Do you mind telling Dawn and Salamence what's going on? I think tonight is our time to leave as well."

            "Of course. But I want to enjoy our walk a bit longer." Roric said.

            I glanced at his face. It was the first time I had seen him look upset. Normally, his face was set in either calculation or amusement. My feet stopped.

            "Roric."

            He smoothed out his expression and looked at me.

            "For someone who is always lecturing me about my inability to show emotion, you're being the perfect bad example."

            Roric cracked a small smile, "I always want to go where God wants me, but this is a hard good bye."

            "Who says it is good bye?" I argued, "Really, you're always boasting about how great heaven is for starters. If anything, logically you're stuck with me for eternity. Especially if you keep up all that nagging praying of yours. It'll come true like a genie in a lamp, right? Except better because this is God we're discussing.

            "Besides, I'm pretty sure we'll meet sooner than you expect. I'm not exactly a disciple yet. I'll need advice from you sooner or later. Maybe I'll mess up just so God will send you to help me."

            "Sounds just like you to do something stupid." Roric said, though it felt off. Like he was trying not to get too emotional and it distracted him from coming up with a proper comeback. But so was I, so really I had no right to judge.

            Before I could retort, Roric was hugging me. I hugged him back.

            It was odd. I'd never actually had a friend like this. Not one who wanted me around. But here Roric was, not wanting to leave. It felt sappy, like a dramatic romance, and yet that's not what it was at all. It felt like I actually had a brother. One that didn't see himself as better as me, despite the fact that he was. One that built me up. That made me feel like maybe I could have this with my own flesh and blood brother.

            A big maybe.

            After a while, he pulled away, nodding at me, "I guess we can try not to get too emotional tonight at our public good bye."

            "We wouldn't want the press to see you with your hair messed up and weeping."

            Roric ran a hand through his black hair, seeming a bit concerned, "My hair isn't messed up."

            "I was kidding. Wow, you're vain."

            He sighed and messed up my hair before I could pull away, slinging his arm back around my shoulder, "Maybe it's a good thing I'm not stuck with you. You're too convicting."

            "Perhaps." I smiled.

            We started walking back to the church in companionable silence, a bitter sweetness lingering around us as the sun continued to rise.

            Roric went into town to find Dawn while I went into the church kitchen considering it was lunch time, thinking I would find Robert. Instead, I found John with a bucket of paint, putting a fresh coat on the cabinets.

            "Hey, Paul. It's really nice to see you here."

            "Hi John." I said, glad to hear that not only did I sound sincere, but I felt it. Before I could even think to ask about where Robert was, I paused and knew there was a lot more I needed to say to the man who had first showed us kindness, "So you really felt like God wanted you to help us?"

            John stopped inspecting the paint and looked at me, "Of course. I know He did. I never walk in that area, really. I'm always here at the church if I'm not at work."

            "What kind of job do you have anyway?"

            He smiled, "I'm a repairman. Can you tell?"

            "But you volunteer to fix up the church?"

            "Yes I do. It's the least I can do for everything God has done for me."

            "That's very nice of you." I paused again, "I'm really sorry about the way I treated you when we first met. I wish I could say I hadn't been myself... but that's exactly what I was being."

            "Well, I don't think that's anything you should worry yourself about. That's not you anymore. Don't let anyone tell you differently."

            "I haven't changed that much since then." I said.

            "Attitude is the biggest change a person can make. Really, don't change your attitude back. There's no point in going in reverse." He winked, "Mark my words, you're going to be even more changed by the time I see you again. That'll be the day. Just think- it's been less than a month and you've changed so much."

            "I didn't think about it like that." I felt myself brighten a bit. Brighten. That didn't happen.

            John grinned, "Well now you will."

            I went over to the opposite counter, staring at the cabinets that already had the new white paint, careful not to brush against the surface and remove its new skin, "Thanks for everything you've done for me. I know you the least, and yet you seem like the catalyst for every good thing that's happened since we've been here."

            "The catalyst is God. I just happened to be listening." He said softly, "All praise goes to Him."

            "True humility." I smiled, wanting to shake my head. I wouldn't have believed him a month ago.

            "It looks like you have more people to talk to, so you better get going. Robert is in his study." John said, putting his brush down and reaching for my hand, "But it really was a pleasure to meet you, Paul."

            "Likewise." I said, shaking his hand.

            I went down a series of doors I hadn't been past yet, finding the one that had a plaque labeled "Pastor" on the outside. However, the door was open, and Robert sat at a small desk in a small office, one that was seemingly crammed into a janitor's closet. He looked up immediately as I stopped outside his door and smiled, "It's nice to see you again, Paul."

            "I was wondering if you had some time to talk." I said.

            Robert rubbed his face with a hand, looking a bit tired, "It seems like we just got on good terms and you're already leaving."

            "I know. But it's time."

            "You sound like Roric." He chuckled, "Most people would think he's crazy, moving around to all sorts of different places, his little sister in tow. They're a pair, aren't they?"

            "They're very different than other people I've met." I said, not exactly sure how to respond. Besides, I didn't really want to think about them right now. They were the hardest to leave behind. This conversation was child's play in comparison.

            Robert studied me, "You've changed a lot because of them."

            And here he was, on the subject. I decided to repeat myself, "They're very different than other people I've met."

            He nodded thoughtfully, "So where do you plan to go now?"

            "I'm not sure. We'll see." I murmured, "But I think a lot is about to happen."

            "I see. I'll be praying for you and Dawn."

            "Thank you."

            "Paul?"

            "Yes?"

            He leaned forward at his desk, looking more serious than I'd see him before, "Treat her well. She doesn't belong to you in any sense. She belongs to God. You have a lot to learn about how to love someone more than you love yourself."

            I let that sink in and said, "Quite frankly, I don't know how to love myself either."

            "Then you have a very long road ahead of you."

            "I do."

            Another nod, "I think you're ready. You're not in it alone. You never will be. Lean on God, go to Him. Just love and put others first. If you do that, life will be good."

            "Thank you." I breathed, feeling a bit more relaxed. But then I remembered the biggest thing I needed to ask him, "There's another reason I came to talk to you..."

            "Need more serious talks about Dawn?" I saw it in his eyes. He would definitely give me a sex talk.

"No, sir." I said quickly before forcing my voice to be smooth, "It's about Electivire..."

"True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less." -C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity

Man, saying good byes are hard! And these are easier ones.

Pokemon Question of the Day: Which Pokemon good bye does Ash (or another Trainer in the show) have that's saddest?

You guys are awesome!

-Flips