Everything burns and aches and pounds and stings and stretches and contorts all at once. Nothing the way it's suppose to be. Everything's wrong.

Gasping for air, for even that necessity seethes with agony, my lungs refuse to work the way they're suppose to. My heart beating as if it doesn't know how to, lurching and clenching in all the wrong ways to pump blood.

My limbs fail beneath me, the muscles burning tight and nonexistent that I simply cannot stand. Or hold my arms up, or move my head, or even just move my eyes back and forth. Eyes that can't even work themselves, just a bunch of colorless blurs around me.

My organs warp and twist, rising a hell inside my body. Yet that's nothing compared to my brain, where my head has this thunderstorm so strong that producing even the simplest of thoughts is the hardest.

Continuing to just try to breathe, which is barely possible, I vaguely sense movement. My nerves might as well be shot and dead, since they're only giving me the mixed up and confusing signals of things I vaguely understand.

Up is down, left is right, strong is weak, air is heavy, the noises now achy. Everything so heavy and yet so light too. All of it one big jumble as it goes into this thunderstorm I once called a brain.

None of my senses, except pain, can tell me anything. My head bubbles with too much pressure to give me memories or thoughts, my ears ring and drown out the world, my eyes see whites, grays, and blacks in fuzzy blobs of images, I can hardly breathe let alone smell, taste is nothing right now, and I can't feel anything.

Ignoring the fact that it may be physically impossible to use any muscles, I try to open my mouth with the intent of learning more around me. But even if I could use my muscles, I quickly find out it's not going to happen.

Since if I can't get clear messages from my nerves, because even though it's completely impossible I feel as if I'm on a boat right now, I can't send them any messages. I'm as clueless as a newborn baby, and as nauseous as one born at sea.

I reach out to my fire, fed up with this nonsense. Something was happening, I can barely remember my own name but I do know that. And I know that I can't just wallow in this swirl of confused reality. Something urgent must be happening.

The flame coughs and sputters at me, shivering as if it were cold or something. I can't do anything with them, they're so small and dark that they can't even do anything. Just a wisp, smaller than the flame of a candle. Fading into embers.

Finally, finally something gets into my pounding brain. I can't tell what it is, except that's kinda nice and it's coming from my chest. Everything else is redundant, everything a mess.

Then the pain explodes from that niceness. Blood boils and burns everything it touches like the liquid misery it is. Muscles that I thought have been simply wiped from existence, spring back into painful agony. The nausea I felt just a bit earlier a slight pang compared to this flipping and twisting.

I try to breathe harder, to try to do something in this backwards world to make me feel better. But my lungs burn with effort, my heart hammering against my chest and forcing that boiling blood to fly all throughout my body.

But so slowly, so torturously slow, it fades. I wish I could whimper in pain, I wish I could see what did this, I wish I could listen to what's around me, I wish I could move and take control, I wish I can feel the world.

I wish, above all else, that I could simply understand what's happening.

Bones ache and pound as organs bristle against each other, but the agony fades away, and I actually get something rather than the jumble of information surrounding me but me unable to understand any of it.

I'm bouncing.

Why? Can't say. How? Can't say. I can't say how long I've been bouncing, I can't say what I'm bouncing on, nor can I say if I'm even bouncing for fun or for some purpose.

But the pain keeps on fading, it still sucks, but it still fades. Faded away enough where I can peel open my eyes, seeing a world not colorless and blurred beyond comprehension, but mostly just black.

I turn to my ears, hoping they might be some more help. I get even less from them, that ringing denying me to listen to any noise that may be happening. I can't even hear my own panting or raging heartbeat.

Refocusing on my sight, it seems this might be the only way to figure out anything around me, I try to use the clamped muscles in my neck to change my view. Because whatever I'm seeing, it isn't helpful.

To my surprise, when I lift my head up, instead of looking up I'm looking at the ground, a blur of green to me. I force myself to look further up, to learn more despite my neck wanting to die. The bouncing makes it hard to see, my eyes are still having a hard time picking up sharp and colorful images, the pain everywhere making it hard to focus.

Piece by piece though I begin to make stuff out. The light green ground below me, dark green on top of brown poles in front of me, with these dark green blobs moving around those brown poles.

As for why I'm bouncing, I'm beginning to think it's because of this black thing I'm on. It's actually moving me, towards something I can't see and can't think of what it is. It's movement the reason why I'm bouncing so much.

Drums pound next to my ear, and I gasp, panicked. But then I realize it's just the pounding of my heart. My ragged breathing quieter but there too, my ears must be working finally.

Yet I also hear two other sets of breaths. One's closer and easier to tell, probably the thing I'm on, the other a bit farther away and to the side.

Turning my head, the muscles really fed up with how much they're being used, I see a blob of grays and darker grays and black just a touch of yellow. I squint, trying to sharpen the image, but my eyes and the bouncing making that really hard.

But there's something that's compelling me to keep trying, as if this is important or something. It would be nice if I could remember, but the pounding in my head has just allowed thoughts to flow easily, best not to push it.

The more black blob has a light grey lower half, with a yellow dot at its top. The thing its carrying a bunch of dull and gray colors. And instead of the brown poles behind it, there's this great big wall of gray with all sorts of colors springing behind that. Expect for the green below everything, there's a whole lot of grays here.

In fact it looks like it's getting bigger. I don't think everything's jumbled at the moment, not like it was before, but it is getting bigger. Am I getting closer? Is this where the thing I'm on going to?

The seething muscles finally win out, and I let my head drop. I'm still confused, I don't understand what's happening. The pain throughout my body has been accepted at this point, and perhaps this is what it's like to be normal? I just don't know.

The ringing completely fades away though, so at least I am improving. However, the only big thing I can hear is my heartbeat. The ragged breathing-

A new sound, a crunching sound coming from below me. I look at it, and instead at a light green ground, there's a light gray ground. More gray. Then a low grumbling coming from behind me, where the thing I'm on is running to.

And more noises shuffle into my thoughts after that, clanks and shouts and cries and claps and pounding. A clamor of stuff. I can't make any of it out, and the noise isn't helping my head get better, but I'd like to think that these noises are coming from good things.

But then it gets too loud, so loud. I open my eyes, trying to find the sources of these noises that hurt. I see nothing expect the same at first, but then we pass the big gray wall. And then nauseating blurs of rainbows and the much too loud noises surround me. And I wish the world was gray again.

Something big and red connects the two big gray walls, trapping me in this vibrant and painful world. My voice hums, an incredibly faint thing compared to everything. Perhaps it's a response to this worse world? I actually can't see it as being anything else.

"Jesse?"

"Is that Jesse?"

"What happened to Jesse?"

"Why was Jesse outside?"

"Who are those two newcomers?"

"Refugees?"

"Did the acid scales do this to Jesse?"

These questions swirl in my mind, and I try and try to shut them out. Jesse, I know that's me, but I don't care for all this noise being made with my name. It hurts and I want it to go away.

Something new tries begins to form within me, using the pain I feel as its foundation. My memory may be blown to bits at the moment, but I know what it is.

Anger.

My heartbeat gets stronger, my lungs sucking up more oxygen with every breath. All the pain in my muscles dims as anger gets stronger, and the meager spark of fire that I have flickers in response to it.

And because of that, I let it die. Choosing instead to try and block out everything, as much as that hurts and as much as it would be easier to boil with anger instead. I don't have the energy to be angry. If there's anything I understand, it's that.

That doesn't stop my heart from pounding though, and in fact, I focus on it. Listening to that and the frantic rush of air as so I don't have to here the questioning words or wonder what it is they're talking about. I want to understand, not be overwhelmed. The anger responds to being overwhelmed.

Another weak groan passes my lips, its sound vibrating all throughout my skull. Then another and another. As if that small little noise could fight out all the loud and annoying words bombarding my head. But in a way, it's comforting that I can use my mouth again, even if it barely produces a noise at all.

The bouncing slows, for the first time I experience it changing. The sudden calming of the organs being jumbled around confusing me. The pain in that area soothes as well, maybe the pain came from the violent bounces and I just didn't know it. Is it this black thing I'm on that's causing me my pain?

They speed back up again, faster than last time, my organs slamming back into each other. A strained groan is kicked out of my stomach, the other organs gurgling their misery at me. It's not really as bad as before, but in the few seconds it was gone, I got really comfortable without it. It sucks now that it's back.

But then the noises suddenly go away, and I try to ignore all pain to look around. All the sickening rainbows gone, objects floating as the thing I'm on races by them. Rushing into even a different area, everything moving around so fast it's making my head hurt.

"Petra!" This new voice, loud yet doesn't cause the same reaction as the other voices. "Put Jesse down and make sure our guests don't try anything."

My body is thrown onto something soft, and my eyes flutter shut at it's comfort. So much better than that black Petra thing, so easy to relish in the delight of pain fading away.

Then a sharp hiss fills the air, another strong voice raditing across the room. "Okay lady, I don't know or care about you, so you better start explaining why you and that old guy were out there in the middle of the demons."

My eyes blink open, as the yearn to understand grows and grows. I'm on the soft thing still, set apart from the others. Two people, the black with a dot of yellow and black thing, which also has quite a lot of blues to it, standing over the lady and limp old guy.

Memories suddenly flash piercing violently into my being. My mouth cries out on its own accord, the memories clawing their way into my thoughts, sizzling back to life. My eyes are squeezed shut, trying to block the burning sight within my mind.

Exhaustion... refugees... demons... all of it mixing together and causing me to be mad? Yet not at those things, at myself and another. Green flashes of... green everywhere, and some infuriating yellow. But white and peace rise above them all.

I cry out, locking the memories up and trying to shove them back down. The two people yelling at me as I'm just trying to get everything stable again. I want to understand but not at the sake of my sanity.

To my ever lasting relief, they vanish just as quickly as they rose. In the future, when my most immediate thought isn't on nausea, I'll wonder what it means. But right now, right now I just want things to calm down.

"Jesse? Jesse are you alright?" I pant, my eyes flickering open to glance at the black person. I wish I could say something, but I'm too focused on breathing.

"Uh... Lukas? I know you can get Jesse's green eyes, but how bad is it that Jesse now has your blue eyes?" The blue and black person speaks, Petra I think, and I look to her. She still holds her sword, but her tone was nothing like when she spoke to the lady.

"I'm going to have to go with very bad, on the really really bad side of things."

"I could help." A weak croak of an old woman floats into my ears. "Please, I know what's happening to him."

"Listen lady..."

The blue one, Petra, talks again in her strong voice, a threat hanging in the air now. But that woman's voice, I've heard it before. I know it. In a world without color, where bright white flames flew from me. In a place where there was no conflict or strife, only peace.

"...trust you?"

The old lady looks at me as I look at her, staring at her brown eyes. "He can tell you, the fire child."

My eyes widen, I didn't think she was about to call me out. How the heck am I suppose to say anything? I can't access my memories without screaming in pain and I have yet to get a coherent word out of my mouth!

"See, this is one of the many reasons why we don't trust you."

"No! You misunderstand!" I roll my eyes, that's been my every waking moment so far. "He has burnt his spirit! He cannot do much of anything without the help of his Gebunden!"

She sends a pleading look at the black one, although I'm not sure whether to be insulted or comforted by her words. I don't like thinking I'm unable to do anything, although that's true, and it is nice to know that my state of being is out of my hands. But being helpless? That doesn't sit right. That makes me wrong and angry again, I don't like it at all. Not one bit.

Black one glances at me, before looking at the blue one. "Watch her. And you lady, even if this doesn't work you have a lot of explaining to do. You better also start thinking about the little demon situation we have on our hands now too."

With a huff, he turns back to me. His still blurry face releasing sigh. I believe that I must have some relation with him, but since I'm too scared to get anywhere close to my memories, I don't have any proof for that.

He must not say anything as he reaches for my chest, leaving me confused still. I wish I could ask him about everything, until he grabs a flap of my shirt and opening it. Now I want to ask when did my shirt get ripped and what's he doing.

Then he takes a deep breath and simply touches my chest.

My whole world lights up in a fantastic array of lights that I can't comprehend all at once. It's great but not overwhelming, calming and pleasing while pushing away every single worry and pain I had.

That's when everything locked away opens back up, yearning for this comfort and strength.

I'm Jesse, all the titles that I've earned to go along with that name too. This is Lukas, who I really should listen to more often so things exactly like this don't happen. Petra is watching over the two other people, my fiercest and feistiest friend.

I smile, all that confusion fading away and now it seems kinda funny how I was acting. Calling stuff blue thing and green things and brown poles, my memory certainly wasn't being helpful.

"Jesse? Are you there... or..."

"Well I finally remember your name, so yeah, I think so." I try to sit up, and I get about halfway there until my muscles fail me. Lukas thankfully able to keep his hand pressed up against my chest as I collapse back down.

"Fire child!" I sigh lightly, it would be nice to have a bit of a breather and still understand things. "Please! You know I am not a threat, that I can help if you allow me."

My eyes narrow at her, a whole stew of emotions boiling out of me. "You're the reason I was possessed."

"What?" Petra's blade lowers towards the lady's throat, even Lukas glaring at her with a venom in his eye that is rarely ever seen.

"No, no! Please, I-"

"I don't want to hear it." Petra growls, and I should probably say something without my anger controlling it. "For what you've-"

"Stop it. I said she was the reason, the guy knocked out cold is the one who did it. Her eyes aren't yellow."

I pause for a moment, letting that sink in as I try to figure out what to say. Generally I feel so strong when Lukas touches me, but even with him touching the mark, I feel so weak and broken. It shouldn't be so hard to think about this.

"So..." Lukas's face is still tight in resentment, but his eyes are curious. "You're a Gebunden, a really old one that should know all about this stuff. So now would be a good time to explain what's happening to Jesse."

"He burned his spirit."

Petra scoffs, and even I raise an eyebrow at her. "Yeah, you've already said that. Get on to the important parts."

"That is important, burning one's spirit is the most powerful ability we have. Only ones with an earned spark can use it. Yet it is fatal to the wielder. The absolute strength of it comes from the spirit fueling the fire. Use it for too long, and there's no more spirit left."

I blink at her, not knowing how to respond at all. Shock? Not really, it makes sense when everything comes together. Fear? Way too tired for that and Lukas is still touching me. That feeling of dodging death? Yeah, I do have a bit of that one.

Lukas somehow is able to respond. "Is that why one of his eyes is still blue? And were blue at all to begin with?"

"Yes, if you hadn't pushed your heat in him, he would have perished as his spirit withered inside his body. Until his spirit recovers, which could last years, his life is being suspended by yours."

"What?" That one certainly got a reaction this time, a recovering spirit is not something I need right now. "As much as I would love to just lay here peacefully, I can't. There's the refugees from Redstonia, and now there's another legion of demons or so walking around carefree. Actually, right now, every single Beacontowner is at risk, every person at Champion city, and especially the Redstonians. That isn't something that can be dealt with tomorrow, it needed to be solved the moment they stumbled out of that portal."

My little outburst sinks in, not even Lukas saying anything to me wanting to work with a dying spirit. The full implications of it all hitting me now that I've said it.

And Petra is the one who voices what we're all thinking.

"We're screwed."

****

Okay, I'm sorry. I know I didn't update yesterday, and I'm really really sorry. I'll spare you from excuses as to why, just know that I am terribly sorry about it.

Anyway, I feel like I'm starting to hit a point of the physical things I can do to Jesse. I just roasted most of his soul, and while there still is mental torture, I think he'll just die if I do anything more. Can Jesse take anything more, in a physical sense?

Although I suppose that's not the right question, since Jesse has to figure out a plan in his state. The better question is what can he do now with what I've done to him.

And I'll see you all in 6 days to answer that! Buh bye!