My very first thought upon waking up is wishing I was still asleep.

There's this burning desire, this screaming need, to warm up. That I'm freezing to death and I have to find something anything that's warmer than me. Such a strong instinct commanding me, so powerful I totally would have believed it if it wasn't for one thing.

My muscles are actually withering hot, an extreme heat being blasted throughout my limbs. Sweltering heat that is suffocating my lungs and cooking my organs. The sweat beginning to leak out makes me damp but doesn't do anything to help with the suffering.

I sigh and try, try so hard to push down the instinct that is very clearly wrong. I really put forth an effort to think of ways to cool me down.

That only lasted a second though, a searing headache burying the complex thoughts and replacing it with impulses. Impulses that sent one clear message: WARM UP!

Shivering violently, I stand up and shuffle out the door. My chattering teeth just loud enough to make a slight echo. Sweat dripping down relentlessly from my arms as I furiously try to rub more warmth in them.

Muscles, dried up and dehydrated, beg me to stop. To stop the shivering that's unnecessary. To relax and conserve energy even though that would mean freezing up. To drink something regardless of the fact the air is full of frozen tiny little ice crystals, digging into my precious warmth.

I force my stiff limbs, which feel frozen to me, to move faster in the hopes I could generate more heat. My heart pounding ferociously to keep my body warm.

Kitchen, I can get something warm to eat in there. Maybe just stand next to the furnace, letting the blissful warmth seep gently into me. I shamble over there faster, ignoring the cries of heat exhaustion from my stomach.

"...insane though..." A muffled irritated voice penetrates my icy state. Getting louder as I get so close to the kitchen that can warm me up. "Where could Ivor need to be other than here right now?"

I open the door, teeth chattering as I attempt to explain. "I-Ivor le-le-left.... re-research-ch-ch gat-gathering."

I don't really care about the stunned silence of my friends at the moment, only that I have to get to the furnace and soak up its heat.

"Jesse!" Olivia, not aware that I'm lacking a serious necessity called heat, blocks my path. "You look absolutely awful! What happened to you?"

She sends some look to the side, but I mumble that I'm freezing and attempt to continue to the furnace.

"But you're drenched in sweat!" My other friends surround me, creating a barrier all around me. It does feel slightly warmer with them around, but the furnace would still be better.

Before I can utter a protest, my head is yank towards Petra. Her hand on my chin though is freezing! She still reaches to feel my forehead even though her face is tight in thought, although all my thoughts are revolving around a wish that she would release her icy fingers.

Thankfully, she jerks both hands away, scowling. "He's burning! Like his skin is on fire or something!"

"Ar-are y-y-y-you insa-sane?" My withered weakened muscles fail to push past the barricade of people. "I-I-I-I'm fr-fr-fr-eeeezing."

"Uh Lukas?" Axel's breath kinda smells like rabbit stew, perhaps I could warm up the leftovers. "This is when you tell us what's wrong with him."

"I got nothing! I can't sense him at all!"

I roll my frozen eyeballs, about to push my way through when everything tilts and spins. Some unknown force pushing me side to side as I struggle to maintain balance. My head unmercifully throbs, black needles dancing at the edge of my sight.

Arms wrap around me, as I lean against a body. I groan, their bodies are so cold when I need to get heat. But I can't stand up, I'm too weak and cold.

"Hey!" A hand snaps loudly right in front of me, jolting my focus up to Petra. "Use your fire if your that cold dumb dumb."

Seeing how I have no other option to save himself from freezing to death, I might as well give it a try. Pushing past the headache and ignoring the writhing of my body, I reach out for my fire. Strange, the flames are smaller than what they usually are. I ignore that, warming up is what's important.

I grab onto them and call them forth. Only for pathetic wisps to rise up, cough and stutter out flakes, before dying down even smaller than what they were.

As my fire dies down, I panic and I feel that crushing NEED to get that heat back. Something, ANYTHING, to replace my fire until it comes back to life. There must be SOMETHING I can do RIGHT NOW!

I snap my eyes open and push myself up, only for my muscles to cramp unbearably and force me back towards the ground.

Panting, I try so hard to get back up. But everything is so toasted, not enough heat... everything's shutting down. All I can do is sit here, dying as my frigid friends hold me up.

"He's getting even hotter!"

Muffled, muffled stuffled voices floating in my head. Just whispers to soothe me, to help ease the pain inside of me. To distract me from the torture of a body without warmth.

"-something... can do..."

The whispers only just came, they shouldn't leave so soon. Perhaps I'm leaving them though? But with the distant agony in my legs, I don't think I can move away from anything.

Raging sharp clarity seethes through my mind, a scream forcing its way out. My roaring urge to find warmth shrieks as it withers down into only a mewling. Pain, in so much more detail than a moment ago, swarms all over my mind.

I open my eyes, mainly just for a distraction, to find blurry shapes slowly focusing. If I wanted to find a distraction, the new screaming instinct that just popped is begging for some water. Or a lot of it.

Due to the torturous cramps in my legs and the air is somehow really heavy, I don't think I'll be able to do that by myself.

"Water..."

Any sort of balance I had is crushed under a new wave of misery. I'm pushed back, leaning onto something as my stomach violently lurches inside of me. How did I go from freezing cold to melting in a span of moments? It's like trading tortures.

Cool nice glass touches my lips, the beautiful amazing liquid of life running into me. I swallow rapid, weakling clutching onto the bottle to make sure it doesn't move away from me.

I groan, saddened when I have drank all the water. Only for my eyes to flutter shut in relief as a new full one replaces the empty bottle. Water, it's so great. Just amazing.

But why, even amidst all of the pain firing up, is there this nagging pull in the back of my head telling me there's something better?

Another bottle replaces the now empty one, I'll think about that nag later. Right now my priorities need to be focused on getting rid of pain and figuring out how it came. And then after that I need to talk to my friends.

So many things to do, and too much pain to get them all done orderly.

I lift my head, and look up at Axel. The one currently holding me. Seeing how raspy and dry my voice was last time I spoke, I just nodded over at a seat. Ignoring the whispers and mutters of my friends as I'm dragged over there, my thoughts consumed by pain and questions.

I plop down into the seat, and fight of a wave of sudden tiredness. Successfully not fainting and sleeping on the seat, I set my mind straight to the best I can. My eyes dart over to Lukas, he must've done something and that may have affected him. He looks a little out of it, as if he's way past his bedtime.

"Oh-okay." I cough, making my voice sound more lively than that raspy noise. "I have no idea what happened."

Petra slumps back into her chair. "Way to be straight to the point."

Olivia turns to Lukas. "Do you have any clue Lukas? You helped him."

"Ah, well, that was mostly speculation. I had no idea if that would even work or not."

"Great." Axel's unibrow turns into a wide V. "So this could basically happen at any time and we have absolutely no clue what it is."

I sigh, reaching down to massage my calf. All my muscles hurt, so badly. I wish I could just... like, pass out right here on the table. It's been less an hour since I've woken up but I feel like I've been running for hours or something.

"Jesse?" I look up at Lukas, who is sheepishly running his fingers through his hair. "What exactly did you feel?"

I sigh again, this would totally be the greatest time to tease Lukas but I'm just too tired for it. I'll keep it in mind though for when I'm feeling more energetic.

"Burning, everything was so hot... so very hot. But I couldn't stop myself from shivering and walking towards anything warm, I felt so convince that I was freezing to death. That everything was happening because I wasn't warm enough."

While everyone reacts slightly different, all my friends give out this one vibe. Why can't we get a break? Exasperation leaking out from them into the air.

"Okay, next problem." Olivia rubs her neck. "Why didn't you activate your fire?"

My chest collapses, air rushing out of me as her words physically hit me. The question a painful slap in the face reminding me, and now I have the ability to realize it. To realize it in all of its wickedness.

I look down, avoiding their eyes as the terrible truth sinks in. Strange, I haven't had my fire for a month and now that it's gone I feel like I've just been shattered.

"It's almost completely gone, I barely even access it."

Lukas gasps, the others all wearing shocked faces too. But they don't understand to the extent Lukas does. I haven't been able to function at times because the flames simply weren't strong enough. And now they're unusable.

"Do you think the two relate...?" I glance over at Petra, gazing off lost in thought.

And has much as I would love to say no, that there's an easier solution to this, I would be lying. It makes sense. I thought I was freezing to death, that doesn't just happen, especially when I'm actually burning up.

However if my fire goes out, that might send a freak out message that I need heat to revive it or something. My body goes into overdrive trying to raise my temperature. All the while any pain that comes up is blamed by not being warm enough to have the fire lit.

"Gosh darn it Petra." I roll my eyes, slightly mumbling. "Why do you have to be right?"

Her eyes don't even flicker at all. "It's a curse."

I sigh and look around, everyone has similar faces. Even Axel, although his doesn't look as deep in thought as the others. But we've already had a lot of bad stuff happen, it's time to get rid of that a bit.

"Okay!" I clap my hands, gathering their attention. "Let's use this time while we got it. First, Ivor is going to the Underneath to try and find really old books that may have some information we're looking for. He'll probably be gone for awhile."

Olivia puts up a strained smile. "Hear that guys? Don't get hurt. Seriously, we have no way to heal you."

I open my mouth, knowing there were other things I wanted to talk to them about but I can't seem to remember. I tighten my lips in thought, I believe it was important but I simply can't remember for the life of me.

Lukas should know, he probably knows. I turn to him, and he instantly understands. "You wanted to speak about lies or something?"

The memory flickers back to life, and I give a grateful smile towards him. "Oh yes, yesterday I was asked about the night when the demons entered Beacontown-"

A shiver erupts from my spine, and I shake the anxiety out of my head before continuing. "I told them that there was a hole in the old wall and wolves got in. Earlier, Petra saw this and we were already heading there when a pack of wolves were in the street. And any blood left on the streets were from the animals."

Petra curtly nods along with Lukas, Axel slowly nods as his mind thinks it over, but Olivia just tilts her head at me.

"You came up with all that on the spot?"

"Not exactly, I already thought of it ahead of time but forgot until I was asked about it." I shrug at the end, pretending like I don't see Lukas's narrowed eyes. Even though he can't sense me, he can apparently still see right through me.

I point at Petra and Axel. "I also said that you two would be out on the new wall keeping lookout. There's only two things you have to do, hold off any demons until the rest of us arrive and ease the citizens' minds."

Axel nods, and a sly smile grows on Petra's face. "So we can practice swordsmanship with each other too?"

"Yep." I give two thumbs up to Axel. "Good luck Axel, you sure do need it."

Petra laughs and bounces up to her feet, a grumbling Axel behind her. Olivia had her day off yesterday and I know she has handled tons of paper at Redstonia.

"So Olivia..."

She sighs and gets up. "Paperwork, I figured."

"Well hey!" She arches an eyebrow at me as she walks to the door. "Don't look so excited."

And the last I see of her is an eye roll before she disappears. I sigh, wanting to sleep as if I've been awake for days. I get up to get another water bottle, that might help. Although I still get this sense that there's something else that would help more.

"You also told me to tell you about the new wall, although nothing much has happened." I take a swig of water before sitting next to Lukas. "I went out there the day it finished, which was right before the whole yellow fire thing, and talked to Stella. I thanked her, a lot, and told her if she had her men take down the old wall she could keep the clay. So sorry if you wanted that clay, she has it now."

"No no, it's fine." I continue to sip from the bottle. "I just wanted to know. It would be embarrassing if I didn't know about the wall protecting my citizens."

He scoffs. "Sure Jesse, you would never be able to lie out of that situation."

Sarcasm, no mistaking it. I take a few more gulps from the bottle, thinking how to respond. Being direct, gently, is probably the best way to go about it.

"I'm only good at lying because of two other abilities, I'm good under pressure and I'm a fast thinker."

"I know that..." He sighs, leaning back into the chair. "I just wish you didn't feel the need to, that you don't feel like it's the only way."

"Sometimes it is."

"But not all the time! Yes sometimes there's no other option, but sometimes you could just be honest. It wouldn't kill you if you're wondering."

"No..." I finish the water, setting the bottle down. Thinking about all my problems, the ones just waiting for everything to calm down so they can pounce on me once again. "But its affects might."

"Oh please," Lukas rolls his eyes. "I don't think-"

He straightens back up in his seat, narrowing his eyes at me. "There's a deeper meaning to that isn't there?"

This is one of those situations where any words can't be used to persuade since the mere act of speaking confirms the question. So I just raise one eyebrow and cross my arms as I lean back into my seat.

Hesitation flashes across his face, before he shakes it away. "Yes, there is. I can't believe you made me doubt myself even though I've been practically a part of you for over a week now."

"Aww, Lukas is learning." I smirk at him, being playful as a defense. "But we got bigger fish to fry, or burn in my case. As in, the absence of my fire."

"Yeah, that's stumping me." I mentally grin, I have successfully changed the conversation. "I don't know what triggered it or if the flames need to be refueled or something. Since it just came out of nowhere in the first place, I never suspected that it was like a normal fire that needed to be maintained."

My nose tickles, and I sneeze before releasing my thought. "Hopefully Ivor finds something, and sooner rather than later, that has any helpful information."

"You just sneezed."

I give that look, the one that totally displays 'Well duh'. Lukas has his thinking face on, which means there's probably a deeper meaning behind his words. So I won't be rude and tease him and just wait for him to conjure his thought.

"You sneezed yesterday too, when we were in the kitchen. Maybe an hour before you suspected that our connection got served. That must be one of the early signs."

"Early signs?" I groan, collapsing onto the table. "That not early at all, it should be like a day. Maybe even two. A week would be really nice."

"Well you did work yesterday, so it might be slower today. How do you feel?"

I sigh, rolling my head to face his. "Still under the weather from all the overheating earlier and, although easily ignorable now, there's like a whisper in my ear telling me to warm up."

I sigh again, deciding to be the pessimistic realist right now. "Can you feel that?"

"Well no." His face scrunches up. "Of course not."

"The disconnect was first suspected an hour-ish after I sneezed in the kitchen, I also can't believe you remember that, but that takes away time as it is already further along."

Lukas rolls his eyes, leaning back. "Don't be so dreary. I can always do what I earlier to make it go away."

With my head still on the table, I raise an eyebrow. "What did you do?"

"Remember that one time where I accidentally took your fire for a few moments?"

"Yes, it was quite horrible. Don't ever do that again."

"Agreed. But I used the same principle. Just pushing my energy into you as a substitute for your fire for a little bit."

I snap my head up. "How? We're no longer connected."

And energy? I really hope that's not his soul or life force, and instead he'll just go to bed early tonight. Nevertheless, I pray we can find a permanent solution to this quickly rather than slowly.

"That's why I wasn't sure if it would work. But it did, so I'm assuming the connection is still there as long as you have some of your fire. Since you screamed though, you must have such a small amount left that it has been severely weakened to the point where it can't really do anything without a big push to overcome a... uh painful resistance."

Sighing once again, I slouch back into the chair. "I wonder what would happen if the connection did snap. Any interference with it has been proven to be painful. At the same time though, we've lived our entire lives without it."

"I uhh, I'm gonna chose not to think about that one."

I let my eyes shut, sighing again in content. "You know Lukas? I never really yawn, just sigh all the time. Does that mean I'm becoming a pessimistic? Or just something wrong with me?"

"Probably both." Lukas chuckles and nudges my shoulder. "Come on sleepy head, you need to rest up."

Groaning, I get up and walk out of the kitchen. I didn't think about the fact I haven't actually eaten anything, I did think about what still needs to be done today though. Olivia I know has paperwork covered, Axel and Petra are on watch, so I suppose this could be Lukas's day off.

"So what are you going to for the rest of the day?"

Lukas smiles at me, with those alluring eyes of his. It's a playful smile, glints of amusement sparkling in his eyes. He turns away from me, and I sigh again. Although my attention immediately snaps in front of me to make sure I don't run into another wall.

"Okay, yeah, don't answer my question. That's fine..." I grumble and he chuckles, but still doesn't say anything. I'm not sure if he's thinking about his reply or just being mean.

Or maybe it's in spite. He knows that I chose to keep a lot of things to myself and now he's doing the same to me. That's clever, but it's a friendly question. It doesn't have to be answered but it would be nice if it was.

So we walk, in silence to the bedrooms. I think it's kinda awkward, but Lukas probably finds it amusing. But when I turn to my room, he grabs my arm.

"Olivia's in there, we're sleeping in my room."

My eyebrows pop up and I whip my head to Lukas, who's grinning at me. "'We're'? I thought we were past that."

"Well, you could sleep on the floor if you want. It has nothing to do with nightmares or anything, I just want to keep an eye on you."

I grumble, a halfhearted argument murmuring out. "There's a couch in the library."

"Not happening." Lukas pulling on my arm to his room. "There's a fireplace in there. I don't want to wake up and see you shivering as you're trying to burn yourself in the fire. I'm keeping eye on you, whether you like it or not."

I don't resist, but do yank my arm out of his grasp. "Some gentleman you are."

"Hey! You can sleep in the bed if you want! I'm not forcing you to sleep on the ground, but I'm not giving up my bed."

I enter his room first, and grumbling with thoughts swimming in my head. "Are you even tired enough to sleep?"

"It may not look like it, but yeah." Lukas throws off his jacket and plops down on his bed. "I haven't felt so drained since when you unchipped me from P.A.M.A.."

"Really?" I tilt my head, not really thinking about the conversation though. "You're that tired?"

"I didn't really know how to give you energy okay? So I just sent all of mine."

His voice got deeper, his eyes flickering shut as his breathing slowed down. I glance at the door, there's a high chance I can just walk out of here and he'd be to tired to do anything about it.

"Don't even think it." I mutely gasp, and turn back to Lukas. He has one eye open and a small smile on his face. "It's locked and I doubt you have the energy to look for the key or break the door."

Again, I sigh, he's completely right about that. He's still smirking at me, which just churns my stomach and makes my heart beat faster all at the same time. Although I really just want to sleep, I'm too tired to be irritated.

So I walk over to the bed, and before I can see his smirk gets wider I roll him over to the far side of the bed. I lay down, instantly sinking into his extremely comfortable mattress. I probably only have a minute of consciousness now, maybe less. Definitely less.

I take a deep breath, that blissful heaviness wrapping around me. Although I can still hear Lukas's rumbling chuckle and last few words.

"Why do you have to be so darn cute when you sleep?"

Or maybe I'm just imagining things.

****

Ugh! I think I have a addiction on ending chapters when Jesse either falls asleep or passes out. Like, so many chapters end like this. even though I'm saying it I still probably won't be able to change it.

Sometime, at some point, Jesse won't be so sleep deprived all the time and I won't end chapters like this all the time. But until then, I feel like not having Jesse tired all the time is unrealistic with everything that's happening.

Also, I'm not sure how many of you have been informed of the symptoms of overheating, but that's what Jesse was experiencing. Heat exhaustion. The shivering and increased heart rate are signs though that his mind believes he is cold. Just so you know. It's pretty safe to say it's going to happen again.

ANYWAY, that's all until next week folks! Bye!