Soft Edge

Haaris with a hurried pace moved past the doctor ignoring his calls and his advice to watch out his faltering steps. The other doctors were leaving the operation theatre and gave him an incredulous look as he ran inside the theatre.

His wife was present there. The energy drained out of him instantly as he tried to move towards Ghazal. Her eyes were shut tightly and lips were pursed. She was in the faint green hospital gown, her skin pale. A white bandage was wrapped around her forehead just matching with her porcelain skin.

But what gave him an utter sense of relief was her faint breathing and the beeping sounds of the machine attached to her showing him that she was with him, she hadn't left him.

"Haaris."

He quickly left his chair on the doctor's voice who was looking equally anxious making him more than worried about his wife.

"Ghazal's ribs had been very badly affected, Haaris. But..."

The doctor nodded his head, pursing his lips to give a small smile.

"Her condition is now somewhat in control. She's safe."

She's safe.

She's safe.

She's safe.

Those two words echoed around him like some merrier bells which soothed his heart to no end. He was stuck at his place, unable to show any kind of reaction. At very few moments Haaris had felt the sense of utter joy and this moment was above all of them.

"This should be your first statement, idiot."

Haaris chastised the doctor, his voice wavering with joy, stress and every single emotion of gratitude he felt at that moment.

"Sir, you can't come in here."

The nurse who was busy checking up Ghazal's reports suddenly acknowledged his presence and didn't stop herself from showing her dislike for his act.

"I know, I will just take a moment."

Haaris pleaded and it was maybe his appearance or something in his voice that the nurse's face softened and she nodded in approval.

"I am waiting for you, tigress."

He whispered near Ghazal and kissed her temple softly, careful not to hurt her bandages. Haaris slowly touched his palm to hers, feeling the mellow warmth of her seeping inside him making him relaxed all of a sudden. That time he felt, how much he was in need of Ghazal.

Baba gave a teary-eyed smile to him as he again came in the corridor. He informed his father and Nanna about this good news, quickly. Ghazal would now be shifted to ICU and would be kept under observation for twenty-four hours. Though there were still some dangers related to her life but a small candle of hope had been lit as Ghazal's blood pressure came in control.

"Baba, you go home and rest. I will be here."

"You are in more need of rest, go, son."

Haaris shook his head stubbornly. He couldn't leave Ghazal without him, he would be with her for the entire time. What if she woke up and didn't found him? He wanted her to look at his face first.

"No, baba. I'll be here." He said and Baba watched him for a good one minute, then patting his shoulder he left Haaris there standing engrossed in his thoughts of Ghazal.

"Haaris, Ghazal had been shifted to ICU. She's still sleeping under the effects of sedatives."

Haaris bobbed his head at the doctor's statement, "Can I be with her for the time being?"

On the doctor's nod, he hurried towards the ICU to see her again. Just a few moments ago, he had seen her but seeing Ghazal felt like Haaris was waiting for the entire century to meet her. He didn't know this type of emptiness that he used to feel without Ghazal. Yes, he used to feel empty and alone without alcohol and drugs when he used to be addict but being with his wife was a different kind of sensation.

His relationship with Ghazal was like a pond of a cold water-which quenches our thirst but leaves us with some kind of sweet eagerness to drink from that pond again. He sat beside her bed pulling up a chair and gingerly took her pale hand in his.

Those hands which used to hold him in his nightmares were slightly warm but wrapped in bandages and pierced with needles. Haaris placed a soft kiss on her fingertips, despite being enveloped with the smell of phenyl and medicines there was a small hint of jasmine around him, realizing him of Ghazal's presence.

"Tigress, you are an anchor to my life. Just the thought of losing you dwindles my whole being. I didn't even realize how you became so much important to me."

It was maybe his tired mind or the sleepless night he spent in worry of Ghazal that he was unable to stop his subconscious to pour out those words. Resting his head nearby Ghazal's hand, he jumped into the valleys of slumber.

***

"Dad!"

A soft voice and slow patting at his cheek brought Haaris back from his sleep. His neck was aching badly due to the uncomfortable situation he was sleeping in. He lifted his head up from the bed giving a sleepy smile to his son who was watching him constantly.

"How's my champ?"

Haaris picked him up in his arms and made him sit on his thigh, facing Ghazal.

"Good. I mished you."

Adam kissed his cheek and he returned it by placing his lips on his head. A previous day looking at Adam's teary face, Haaris had felt a knife slicing through his heart and he had determined to keep him happy till his last breath to see that beautiful pearly white smile.

"Ma ish shleeping?"

"Yes. She will wake up soon."

Saying that he got up giving a glance at his sleeping wife, the morning light mildly glistening her beautiful features that he couldn't stop himself from kissing her forehead. Leaving the ICU he found Baba and Mr.Yousuf chatting with each other. Nanna too was sitting at one of the benches reading something.

"Good morning. " Haaris rested his head on Nanna's shoulder and she patted his cheek in adoration.

"How's Ghazal?"

"Still sleeping. "

"She will wake up shoon."

Haaris chuckled listening to the same words from his son, Nanna nodded giving a painful smile to her kids. Her eyes were somewhat swollen and were looking tired as she too was unable to sleep in worry of Ghazal.

"You can go in, Nanna, if you want to see Ghazal." As Nanna made her way towards the ICU, Adam shook Haaris's hand, talking in a mere whisper.

"I want to eat shomething."

With a smile he held Adam's hand, standing from his seat. He too was in need of some food as he had spent his whole night on his lunch, the previous night his hunger had vanished in some corner seeing his wife going through so much.

Opening the door of the canteen, he was hit by the welcoming aroma of coffee instantly reminding him of Ghazal's coffee. She didn't know he had tried coffee for the first time in his life. There was no relation between him and caffeine but Ghazal introduced him to coffee in those one week after their wedding.

He rubbed his hands together to keep himself warm. The winter was gradually increasing so as the passing cold wind which was blowing soothingly. He tightened the blanket around him and tried to push back the images of the nightmare away from his mind.

"Here." Haaris looked up to find Ghazal with two cups in her hand. She sat beside him, handing him the cup of beverage.

"What's this?"

"Coffee. It will keep you warm." He placed the cup beside him and wrapped the blanket around her petite body. She didn't know the word 'self-care' as he always had to remember about herself.

How serene that feeling was! Sitting beside his wife, listening to their breathing getting gently meld with the slow buzz of crickets. Staring at the moon which was about to end its journey soon.

"It's nice."

"Thanks." Ghazal gave a small smile, moon shyly peeking from above the cloud and brightening her nose ring more.

"You have a beautiful smile, do you know that, tigress?"

"Now I know." Ghazal giggled, her cheeks painted in a faint red color showing her blush which he loved to see on his wife.

"Dad. I will have a pastry."

"Good."

Haaris showed thumbs-up to his son getting back from his past memory. Standing in a queue, he was waiting for his turn when the man in front of him turned and if he hadn't held the tray properly it would have been dropped.

"I am sorry."

"No problem." Haaris carefully shifted the tray to his hands and the man in front of him holding his arm to stop him.

"If I am not wrong, you are Haaris Yousuf."

Haaris looked at him surprised, unable to comprehend the man standing in front of him. But suddenly a light bulb went off in his mind and how could he forget that man. A smile made its way to his lips as he shook his hand with his long-lost friend.

"Fazal Bashir."

***

"I never thought we will meet here."

"I too hadn't had any idea that we will meet again."

Haaris sliced a piece of a pastry and fed Adam. He was never hoping to see Fazal after his family got shifted from Hyderabad to Bhopal in his teenage years, ending their long friendship.

"So how's life? What are you doing here?"

"Life's good. My wife has got into an accident, she's here but now somewhat fine."

Fazal winced hearing his reason and bobbed his head. He gave a warm smile at Adam who was nibbling on the wafer.

"I must say Haaris, your son is just like you."

Haaris's entire being glowed at his praise and he just patted Adam's head. In his younger years, Fazal was the most important companion of his life and he used to share every problem with him without any hesitation. This time also, he told him everything about his life, his mother's tragedy, his addiction, Ghazal's entry in his life.

"Tell me about your fam-"

"Fazal..."

His question died in the middle as a soft voice broke their conversation. Fazal turned his head with a smile at the source of the voice and Haaris too looked up seeing a veiled woman with a little boy in her arms.

"Sorry princess, just catching up with an old friend. Come on join us."

Fazal stood up from his place and made her sit beside him taking the kid from her grasp. The lady slightly tilted her head towards Fazal's ear and whispered but it was too loud for him to hear, a small smile formed on his lips.

"How many times do I have to tell you, don't use your endearments in public."

Fazal chuckled in response. Haaris was already liking the couple and seeing them he was remembering himself and Ghazal.

"So, Haaris this is my wife Zinia and this is our little boy Isa."

Haaris gave a tight-lipped smile to the lady at her greeting and Isa was too engrossed in his father's company to acknowledge his presence. Zinia, this name felt familiar to him a lot.

"Dad, Isha ish sho shmall."

"Jusht like you." Zinia mimicked Adam, pinching his nose bringing forth a shy giggle from his son.

"Oh my God! Is this the same Zinia who had poured a full bucket of water on you when I was at your home?" His sudden question got two distinctive responses, while he got an amused groan from Fazal, Zinia chortled at his memory.

"Yeah, I am that Zinia. Haaris bhai. "

"How-" Again his speech got halted by the ringing phone of Zinia whose eyes crinkled at the caller id.

"Sorry. Fazal I have to go, Narmeen is calling me in her room."

Fazal nodded, handed her Isa carefully. Haaris was still looking at them with awe as Fazal stood up from his place and placed a soft kiss on her veiled forehead, shying the lady all again. In his childhood, he used to hear a lot about Zinia from Fazal. How she was so chirpy, how his parents were so much fond of her, how she drove him mad by her mischiefs and all! But it never gave him the slightest idea that he would see them together in the future.

"How you both got together? Last time I checked, you both could murder each other with bare hands." Haaris was unable to stop himself to ask that question which was bugging his mind for the past few minutes.

"Ok, that's a lot of exaggeration." Fazal quipped when his laughter subsided, "I think, that's love which changes everything. Yes, we never got very well and circumstances made us be with each other but slowly all got in place and that's all began to feel meaningful, especially Zinia and my relationship."

Haaris just nodded hearing his truthful answer. Somethings were still difficult for him to understand regarding his future but he was sure by now that he couldn't imagine his life without Ghazal in it, she had made her place so firm in his heart, in his life that everything without her felt empty and stark.

"Dad, can we go to Ma," Haaris replied in affirmative and stood up from his chair.

"Got to go Fazal, it was so nice meeting you again. You should join us someday at dinner."

"Definitely someday. We have to catch a flight to Hyderabad, tonight. But I want to meet Ghazal bhabhi, who has got a grip over you."

Haaris laughed and hugged his friend. Like that, two friends bid their goodbyes to each other and again got busy in the chaos of their own lives.

***

"You know what Ghazal I got to meet my old friend Fazal Bashir. He has a nice family, I never imagined him to be a family kind of guy. "

It was night and still, Ghazal was sleeping. Doctors were showing their losing of hopes as they were signifying her fewer chances in covered words. But, he didn't want to lose hope, he didn't want to think anything bad for his Ghazal. He had sent everybody home and he didn't move an inch from the hospital.

"Just wake up, tigress."

Haaris kissed her wrist, breathing in her jasmine scent. "I don't like you all silent, you know this. Yet, you are testing my patience."

Haaris didn't stop himself from complaining, his eyes getting moist with fear of Ghazal stranding him in his difficult life. How he would cope with his life? No, no it was bad if he was thinking like this. He should think positive, good.

"I know I drive you mad but I will try to be good from now on, tigress."

His voice croaked as Haaris rested his forehead on the edge of the bed. Tears slowly slipping out of their residence and wetting his dried cheeks.

"You look funny when you cry."

Low stammering forced him to look at Ghazal who was trying too hard to open her tightly shut eyes and got succeeded. She gave a pale smile to him which was covered with a pain she was enduring yet it had the power to enlighten his surroundings. He got bathed with an utter sense of relief and happiness as she slowly blinked her eyes at him resulting in a nervous chuckle from him.

He didn't decipher his next action as he quickly lunged forward and hugged her, hiding his face in the crook of her neck. Haaris pulled a little back hearing her muffled wince and looked into her eyes which was silently staring at him.

"I thought I lost you." Ghazal gently moved her fingers in his hair with a timid smile, "I too felt the same." Haaris with a smile touched their foreheads after kissing her eyelids.

"Really?"

Ghazal only nodded and to his disappointment, Haaris had to move back to his place as there was a knock on the door. He moved outside the room to give Ghazal some privacy as the nurse came in to check her. He could see some shades of surprise on her face seeing Ghazal awaken. By that time the nurse left, he had informed everybody about Ghazal. It was so much for him to handle this much happiness.

"There will be some problem for you in breathing till that fracture on your ribs heals. That knee fracture is not so severe but will take time to heal."

The doctor told them after checking Ghazal's condition, "As this knee will heal, you can take your leave but have to take proper rest without any exertion."

They both nodded in understanding, "So I will have one more round of check-up in the morning. Till then, Good night Mr. and Mrs. Haaris." the doctor bid the farewell greeting and left them alone. Ghazal was still in the ICU and would be shifted to the private ward tomorrow, she was still having some problems in speaking and breathing as it was some sort of difficult task for her to do with the bruised ribs. But all was fine with him if Ghazal was with him.

"You know what that nurse said to me?"

"What?" Haaris asked taking her hand in his, sitting on the chair facing her.

"She said I am lucky to have such a loving husband who didn't leave my side in these days."

"Yeah, that's true. You are so much lucky." Ghazal rolled her eyes and Haaris kissed her knuckles in adoration. She was still managing to talk though her words were breaking.

"She was looking so much impressed with you just like those silly ladies in my hospital who used to get crazy by only seeing you."

"Am I sniffing some kind of jealousy, Mrs. Haaris?"

"Why will I be jealous? They can stare at you all they want, you are stuck with me." Her witty reply was enough for him to split into amused chuckles. There would be nobody to handle him properly except her, his Ghazal.

"Yeah, that's the point. "

Haaris kissed her forehead, his heart grateful for many things at that time especially for the life of the lady in front of him.