My curtain opened a little and a tall girl with chocolate-brown skin, hazelnut eyes, short black hair and green circular glasses. It's like there's something about her, something lively and upbeat that made me feel great. 

" Hiya, I'm Lily. You must be Melinda. But I always think that a person should get a right to speak for themselves and not have these stupid whiteboard things. So I changed my whiteboard thing, come see? "

She spoke it all in a fast, high-pitched voice. I glanced around for Jana but she wasn't in the ward so I slipped into Lily's room. It was much more homely, as if she'd been here for a while because of the stuffed closet, the clothes everywhere, bars of chocolate, a horde of books and fuzzy koalas?

" So? Come on, look at my whiteboard! " I looked up and saw that it was filled with pretty illustrations and drawings.

Surprising! I mean her, a drawer? And a reader? And a fashionista? How many things can one person be? 

" Well you like? " She goes impatiently," I mean, I hope you do. I did them myself, I'm trying to be like Grandma. She was a great. She drew endlessly beautiful drawings in five minutes flat. Oh I miss her. And Mum, and Dad. " 

She goes quieter when she talks about her family and my fears start piercing me like daggers again. 

" Sorry, I'm being stupid. It was years ago. " 

I take her hand," We're not in here because we're ill are we? "

" No, we're not. It's because we, or at least I, have a stupid, stupid life. " She sighs bitterly.

" Go on, " I say gently.

" Enough of my sob story, you first, " she says, guesturing at her bed. We sit down.

My story sounds stupid, stupid compared to hers. I mean, she's lost all her family. It sounds great, but really? Mum and Dad do all the things I can never do, cook, the laundry ( not cook the laundry ), buy me stuff- Basically e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g, who did she get the cooking, the laundry, the shopping, the e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g from? 

" It's not that bad- " I try to shrug it off, and I feel tighter and tighter, my brain aches from all the overload of grief and pain crammed inside it.

" Lily! " Jana appears inside," Linda! We were looking for you! No, no, Lily you've worked yourself up into a state! Here, come on. "

I watch in horror as Jana hands Lily half of a white pill. Are they drugging her? Lily gobbles it down and sighs in relief as she rolls over on her bed.

" Linda! " Scolded Jana," She can't be worked up into a state, she was reducing the amount of pills! Oh Linda- "

" I wanted some company for a change! " I said angrily," You're drugging her, aren't you? "

" Quiet down! " Jana glared," People have gone through a lot more than you, brat. It's a sleeping pill! She'll be perfectly fine. Now, out, she needs that sleep! "

Jana ushers me out and into my room. Stewart winks and mouths, 'Don't mess with her,' or something lame like that.

I think of Helena.

" Jana? " I look at her.

" Hmm? "

" Do you know how Helena is? "

" If it's good news I'd've told you. But it's not bad news . . . she's the same as before. Now, I'm sorry but you should probably leave all the children alone. Good news is that  you can go soon. So, how are you? "

Honestly? How are you? Lily's family. My family. My kidnapping. My BROTHER? MY SISTER? My LIFE! Everything. Someone almost sacrificing herself for ME. Everything. Is. So. Wrong.

" I'm -" Scared? Worried? Sad? Overloaded with information I can't take? Have been through so much in what, four days than I have in my ENTIRE life? Or even fine, perfectly fine.

" I could be better, " there, that's alright isn't it.

" Uh-huh, I get that, I just mean, what's wrong? "

" The world is. " I finish.

" No, come on, what is wrong? You can tell me, you're not the only one who's been through a bad time. " I look up at her and see her eyes are glittering with emotion.

" Jana, I'll tell you, if you tell me. "

" Oh come on, " she teased," Don't blackmail me. "

" I'm afraid I am, " I said seriously.

" I'm afraid it's a no. Look, I don't need you to tell me, I know you're parents have a few clues, but you really don't want me knowing the wrong side of the story, do you? " 

" I guess not. "

" Then tell me. "

" Thing is I told my parents most of it, and whatever I told them isn't the wrong side- "

" About your new siblings, I know the rest. And your parents know one half of the story, probably the bad half. "

" I-I don't like it, it's not fair. I don't want Mum and Dad to love someone else, when it's not even their own child! They're ignoring their true child! They love the ones that have been dumped and have nowhere to go but they start ignoring the one that's actually theirs! " 

Jana stroked my hair," I know how that feels. "

I shove her hand off, " No, you don't! "

" No, about the sibling thing. I have a twin, I thought she was a horrible brat, I did things I'd do anything to forget, Linda. You can't let yourself make my mistakes. If I tell you this, you promise me not to become like me? "

I swallow a lump in my throat and nod.

" I was a criminal, Linda," she whispered, her face red in shame," I am a monster- "

" You aren't, " I confirm, but feel scared now I know Jana was a criminal, but then I think of Cora and relax," It's okay, my friend's an ex-criminal. "

She laughs," What did she do? Steal a candy then never did it again? Nah, I was much worse- "

" She was a kidnapper, I persuaded her to change. "

Jana looks stunned then giggles," Hmm and who could that be? "

" How do you think I escaped being kidnapped- "

" You were kidnapped? "

" You haven't been told that! "

" I was told that you've had a tough time, in hospital must be hard, have new siblings. That was it, come on then? " She looks at me, all eager.

I couldn't resist that face, I told her e-v-e-r-y-t-h-i-n-g. 

" But I'm a monster. I'm a murderer of Helena's. And I really hate how Mum and Dad are totally loving kids who aren't their own, they should enjoy the kid who's truly theirs, the one they had. They should be happy with their own and so should Kick and Clara-girl's parents. "

" Linda, it's not what you think- I can't tell you this, you'll find out later on, but . . . You're parents can't have children. Any at all. "

" But they had me. "

Jana looks at me sorrowfully, and shakes her head," One day you'll know. "

Know what? The rest of the day passed in a blur.