That mentioned person here,

Rizwana_Rizu,with your permission,

I took the lines.

This is for you!!

[P.S: Rizu,dont interfere with my fictional characters, especially, Shane.😂]

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My eyes hit as flowers blossomed in the desert. My sweat buds feel like fading in the sky, which then would be stored in the vapour to rain the epitome of excitement. As I am good at framing, I put up a facade of strength and squeals at him, "eeyyyy...Budha saving a girl doesn't repay flirting!!!beautiful it seems".

Before he can say anything I whoosh of, as I reach a certain extent which would say, far but not so, I swirl around to see him having that same spooky smile. In no time I close my almond sights which are swamped with excitement as well as humiliation. If you ask why I'm moved, queasily don't know, but that feeling at teenage when someone remarks us as 'intelligent, 'gorgeous 'sometimes fells into the ground.

I find others sharing how funnily they escaped from Vikram as they drank every sip of cola. As I join, for my blow, Fin questioned me, "while we were behind the cafeteria, where were you lurking?".I blink my eyes twice making a moment to think, I drink a sip and elegantly tells,' was sandwiched between vans'.

Making them arduous to believe Tessy throw me out by her words, "why would someone do that?".Tessy, in terms of character, the one who doesn't know about her much will say,'' oh...how cool!! I want to be like her ''.If the Aladdin ever happens to appear and commands a wish to switch both the body and personality to Tessy, after a short while, I guarantee, they will be like, ''oh please...Get me out of this hell!! This isn't what I meant'.

"As if I lied", I shout, which makes her mouth shut. In words, there isn't any problem if I say what exactly happened. It's not the problem when I say them, the exact problem is after that.'——————'As the loudy announce its 5th period, that officers-boots whoosh into our class with that devil facade. Jessica turned to whisper, "waste-bunking...SURPRISE!!".As for me, it was almost like producing a grenade and during the war, it doesn't work at all. How embarrassing is that?.

I frankly don't know how greedy Bennet is. Apart from being present on his hour, he wants to be present on other teachers' hours too which is equal to having an iPhone and then again borrowing one from your sister.

'I have a dream that's worth more than my sleep', I see it written on Tessy's notebook. Dreams?. Ah! I wish I could find it. People say everyone will eventually find their dreams but never said how and when will I.peopel say everyone's dreams will come true but never said how to.I'm not stuck in the fictitious world, I'm stuck in the real world with fictions thoughts. As for the society, teenage years are referred to, where we find our dreams and by the age of 20 or 30 done!!. Its been years, I wish that someone would help me to seek it, okay even if it's a demon, cause all I want is finding it.

"I know his name", breaking me from my solemness Richard whisper who sits just in front of me on the next bench. As he is always bragging, I did not heed instead, looks right where the windowpane embraced the touches of the heavy serene flurry.

"I do seriously know his name", he then reiterates." Don't make Bennet throw me outside just like yesterday. Done with notes yaar...come to the point. Know who's name?", I write in a paper that passes it on. But I do likes standing outside, the cool breeze, and all, but the after-effects of it are' insomniac nights'."You are beautiful", he passes it on me."Get lost", I think twice before I write this because it must be his another time receiving these so mean words from a girl. He used to tell how profoundly he liked her but never revealed her name.

I knew this would happen, and I'm all ready to endure the after-effects.' His name is Shane Michael'.It resonates in my mind a few times but never to pierce.

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Sometimes, I don't really concede the reason of my existence. Nor why I breathe. I envy everyone in this world, for being living better than me. I envy how they breathe. I envy how they speak. I envy everything about everyone. But, my pals asserts to me as 'very opened speaking girl', I'm damn not.

Each of my friends thinks that. I never shared truths' meant about me, cause my heart never accepted my best friend, Alina, whose name comes first when I'm being asked about my best friend. But she never really is. I've never shared my feelings, my covets but still, she thinks I do share everything. I always feel bad at myself, because that, I trusted no one. I didn't know whether it is a part of teenage feelings.

I always fear friends changing into foe later in the future turning against the tool that I fear the most, 'my secrets'.What if later they shout out my secrets to the world?. It's not that, it could destroy the world but it would definitely destroy me. I wouldn't be able to overcome it."Naira.....Naira......Naira.......!!!!!. Dammit!!! can't you hear me? ",  Anna is shouting at me as I sit on the window side of the van." What the damn??".

"Look left".'

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"Are you alright?", this same question was asked by Anna as I couldn't even recognize that reached home. I answer with a shaky smile that I'm fine and lie that had a hard day. As I drape myself in after the shower, while my eyes are showering too. Takes a look at the mirror to notice that my eyes have become red so is my cheeks...

Being an HSP [high sensitive person] people around me has a lot to do with my current mood. Pulling out my thoughts I tried to get back at sleep but the feelings didn't. I'm not what people see. My pals see me as an energetic, courageous, accurate, and inspire even a few told me so. Deep inside I'm a pale, broken HSP and negative. I tried a million times to get back normal, I damn didn't know that, whether these thoughts would end up if I become an adult.

Every time I thought to be normal, I meant, to show the real me, deep inside me the hardcore had hit me hard saying both yes and no. Acting like smart, I did try to know whether other teenagers are frightened to show up the real. I believe somewhere or something that will make every human masked.

Just like my predicament I have seen, teenagers coping up hard. I try to pull aside my thoughts but they are flowing like the never-ending sea with the semibreves of cluelessness.

"Life gets exhausted when you act differently from what you are when it's for the society it gets like hell", engulfed in thoughts I roll here, and there on my bed to find a paper lying on the drawer which lies left to it. I bring up a pen and pours into it

Everybody expects me to be someone that is not...it's hard to be a different person for a society who even knows me barely... And if I don't behave according to their wish... I am put into the list of bad teenagers...Everyone says that teenage is a phase in my life where am tend to make big mistakes that gonna leave a scar forever... to the extent it is true, but they don't understand that I can control myself from doing something bad...the constant reminder: you are a teenager... It lacks my confidence every time I try to do something new, like being doing the right thing... What if it is a mistake??. I wish I had a gene to let me know which and who are true and false."

This is why I'm afraid to make plans. People often ask me, ' what are your future plans?'.' FUTURE PLANS BELONGS TO FUTURE, 'I wanted to say but I don't cause this will put me in bad teenagers list. I AM MAKING UP MYSELF GOOD, I'M MAKING MYSELF DO WHAT I DONT WANT TO. Is this what I suppose to do?. Is this what all teenagers suppose to do?."

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was so excited about this current novel, because it's all about teenagers. Please let me know any mistakes, content error anything. Did you like it so far?.Relateable?.

I hope you liked the chapter.

~VOTE*REVIEWS~

love you all.

Your Author,

Mariyam Ridha