It was now the end of May. A month had passed since I found out April was alive. Keeping it a secret from my family was just about the hardest thing ever. Watching them wonder where she was and not know if she was alive- yet I knew she was- it was killing me.
It helped that Ava knew. It helped immensely. The whole month of May we hung out consistently. And it was definitely weird- because I knew she still wanted me. And of course I wanted her. But I think what was most important during that time was just having her company. A lot of the time together we spent just hanging out and not even talking- but it wasn't awkward. It was a comfortable silence. So much had happened- we needed the peace.
Katie moved back home after graduation. She was still going strong with Connor. He lived about 45 minutes away, but they were determined to make it work.
My mom wanted to have a small get together for Memorial Day weekend. She barbecued a bunch of food, and made drinks. I invited Ava, who happily said she would come.
I remembered last Memorial Day at my house- April got positively wasted and had to wind up sleeping in her old room. She was the life of the party, of course. I now knew she was out there somewhere, but I hoped she was okay- and doing something for Memorial Day weekend.
Much to my chagrin, Candace and Kenny came to be barbecue. My mom of course was buddy buddy with Candace the whole time. I noticed my dad didn't even acknowledge Kenny, and he didn't acknowledge my dad. I didn't even look his way. But I noticed Candace kept looking my way.
At one point I got up from my spot on the porch to go grab another vegetable kebab. I couldn't get enough of them. And Candace walked right up to where I was, and put more food on her plate. She looked put together and glamorous, of course.
"The food your mom made is delicious." she said.
"Yeah." I nodded.
"Josephine...I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for how Kenny behaved at the bar that night." Candace turned and looked at me.
"You shouldn't have to apologize on behalf of your boyfriend." I said, turning to look right at her. Out of the corner of my eye I could see Ava looking at us.
"You're right- I shouldn't. But he feels bad. We both feel awful." Candace said.
Now that I knew Ryan- I didn't have as much hate toward Candace and Kenny. I wanted April to come back and be with Ryan- not Kenny.
"I guess you guys can't help that you fell in love." I said.
"We can't help it. I wish we could, but we can't."
"Just know you're in for a storm when April comes back." I said, and then I realized what exactly I said. When.
Candace looked at me, "When she gets back?"
"Yeah. Because I know she's going to be coming back." I said, "I still have hope." I had to catch myself.
Candace nodded. "I want to. But it's really hard to."
She's alive. She's alive.
When I sat back down, I kept thinking about this creeping thought that was in the back of my mind- that Gabi was playing me. That she didn't know anything about April. Or that she had something to do with it. I kept telling myself it was just my anxiety. I literally heard Gabi on the phone that night. But I didn't hear April. And I hadn't heard much from Gabi since she told me about April.
In the midst of my thoughts, my phone rang. When I looked down and saw it was Gabi, I grabbed my phone.
"Run. Go answer it." Ava encouraged me.
I ran inside my house and up to my room. I slammed my door shut.
"Gabi, what's up?" I answered, out of breath.
"Are you okay? You sound like you ran a marathon." Gabi said.
"I'm fine. What's up?"
"April said I can tell you what happened to her. And where she is."
I felt my heart start to beat faster, "Okay." was all I could say.
"But I can't tell you over the phone. It has to be in person."
"Can I come over tonight?"
"Sure. What time are you thinking?"
"Does 10 work?"
"Yep. And I know Ava knows, but come alone." Gabi said.
I told Ava about how Gabi wanted me to come over.
"You have to." Ava said, "But Gabi better not be fucking with you."
"Believe me, I'm nervous about the same thing." I said.
My family was pretty drunk. Enough that they barely even noticed Ava and I leave. But I sent Katie a text saying I was going over Ava's. Connor was at the get together, and she seemed smitten. He also seemed really into her- and I was happy for her.
Ava stood with me in front of my car before I got in.
"Come over after you are done with Gabi?" she asked me.
I nodded, "Okay. It might be really late."
"I don't care. I won't be sleeping."
"I'll be there." I said. I looked at Ava- the girl I loved. She looked so pretty in a short sleeved red dress that came down to her mid thigh. I noticed she was looking at me as well.
And then she came up a step closer, and kissed me. It was gentle, and soft. But it lit a fire inside me.
She pulled away and gave me a small smile.
"What was that for?" I asked her.
"Just be safe, okay?"
I nodded. "I will."
The whole ride to Gabi's I felt like I was going to throw up. Was she playing me? What was I about to find out.
When I parked, I had adrenaline rushing through me. I knocked on her door.
I must've knocked hard because she answered, "Jeez. You're going to wake up my neighbors, Josephine. Come in."
I walked in, and started pacing, "Gabi, you better not be playing me. You better actually know April is alive."
Gabi walked up to me and put her hands on my shoulders. "Look at me." she said.
I looked her in the eyes.
"Josephine, I am not playing you. I swear to god." she then let go of my shoulders, "Come sit down and listen to something."
I followed her to the sofa and she pulled her phone out of her pocket.
"I had a missed call today. I was just ending work. And listen to who it was from." Gabi said. She then pressed a button on her phone.
And my heart almost stopped when I heard the voice come through.
"Hey, Gabi. I've decided it's okay if you tell Josie what happened. But you can't go into too much detail. But I want her to know- I'll be ready to see her soon."
April's voice. Her calling me Josie. It was too much for me in that moment. I broke down. Right there on the couch.
And to my surprise, Gabi came over and just put her arms around me. "It's okay, Josephine." she said.
I was just overcome with emotion. I could not help myself. I was a sniffling mess when I finally came up for air.
Gabi grabbed me a tissue from the box on the coffee table. "Here." she said.
"Thank you." I said, and blew my nose.
"I'm going to tell you first how it came about that I am talking to April." Gabi said.
"Okay." I nodded. I was scared to hear this. But ready.
"April is working as a stripper in Philly." Gabi said, and my heart dropped when she said that. "And you know, I like a good strip club from time to time." she chuckled. "Especially if the girls look anything like April."
"Okay, continue." I said.
"Sorry. So this was back in the end of November. After work one night I went to a strip club with my friends from work. And this one girl, she's giving me a lap dance. And I notice her features look familiar. But she's blonde. And she has bigger lips. And different colored eyes than April- but when she came up and started looking me in the eyes while dancing on me- I knew. It was April."
"Oh my god." was all I could say.
"So naturally, I was like 'April?', and she immediately covered my mouth and dragged me across the room basically. That's when she told me to never call her that. To call her Honey."
"Honey? What a fucking stripper name."
"I know, she could've been more original I think. But anyway, she kept denying it was her. And keep in mind- this was a few days after I met you. So I told her- I met your sister. She came storming into the apartment." Gabi said, "And she froze. Asked which sister, and I told her that it was you. I immediately saw her eyes soften. And she caved. Since then, I've been in contact with her. I've seen her a few times."
"Thank you, Gabi. For telling her I came to the apartment." I said. "Who does she live with?"
"Another girl she strips with, Callie. They live in an apartment. She's a recluse basically, she only comes out at night to the strip club." Gabi said.
"Can you tell me why she is in so much danger?" I asked, terrified to know the answer.
Gabi looked me straight in the eyes, "Josephine- someone you know tried to kill her."
What.