I don't even remember driving the almost 2 hours away to the morgue. My head was up in the clouds. I just remember Ava's hand on my knee the whole time telling me it was going to be okay. I was glad that she was there with me. This could wind up being the worst night of my life.
Ava waited in the car while me and my parents were led into an office by the Chief Medical Examiner, a woman named Amanda. She was very warm and welcoming- I would assume you'd have to be to have the kind of job that she has.
She sat us down at a round table in a dimly lit room that had book shelves and certifications on the wall. I didn't even know what time it was at this point, but I knew it was late.
I saw photos face down on the table. I had been expecting to go into a cold, dark dungeon-like  morgue, not an office. I stared at the face down photos. They could be my sister.
"Would any of you like anything to drink before we begin?" Amanda asked.
We all shook our heads no. Even though my throat was bone dry. I just wanted to do this. I felt like I was going to throw up. This was one of those moments that I just needed to get through- no matter what the outcome.
"The photos you are about to see are of a body, but they aren't graphic." Amanda started, "The cause of death for the body in these photos was strangulation. So there are no deformities. But the body has decomposed, it was found out in the woods. So that is why we need identification."
"And this body...it seems to match April's description?" my mom asked.
"It does. But there was no identification."
"Can you tell by the teeth?" my mom asked Amanda. This moment must've been terrifying for her. She was possibly going to identify her daughter.
"The teeth have been removed, it seems. Whoever did this, they've done it before to people." Amanda shook her head. "Let me know when you're ready to identify. Please, take all the time you need though."
I looked at my parents. My dad was looking down. And my mom was staring at the photos.
"Turn them over." she said.
Amanda turned over the first photo, which was a close up of the face. The ghostly pale, almost blue face. I really didn't want to see it. And I felt like I was going to throw up my whole dinner as she turned the photo over. And my stomach lurched when I saw long, dark brown, almost black hair.
But it was clear as day to me- this was not April. I felt tears spring to my eyes. For the first time in my life these were tears of relief. I looked at my mom to see tears rolling down her cheeks.
"It's not her." my mom said.
"What is giving it away that it is not her?" Amanda asked.
"Different facial features. Especially the nose." my mom said, as my dad nodded.
"Can we see the body?" I asked. I had to be sure this wasn't April. And I could identify that from her tattoos.
Amanda nodded. "Yes, I can show you a picture of the front and back of the body. I do want to warn you that the body is nude, and you will be able to see everything."
"Okay." I nodded.
Relief flooded me when I looked at the females legs. She didn't have the tattoo April had on her thigh, of a rose.
"She doesn't have April's thigh tattoo." I said.
Amanda nodded. "This must be a huge relief for you. I am sorry to have had you drive so far."
"It's fine." my dad said, "I'd rather know it isn't April."
As we walked out into the cold February night, I still felt relief. But it didn't last for long. Because for all I knew, April could be out there- not alive. And I also felt terrible for the young woman who we did just look at photos of.
Ava was walking toward me as I walked out of the morgue.
"It wasn't her." I said, and Ava immediately enveloped me in a hug.
We stood there for what felt like a very long time in the parking lot hugging. I was feeling exhausted, but didn't want to let go of her.
My parents were watching us as we pulled away. I could see my mom wiping tears from her eyes. And to my great surprise, she gave Ava a hug. And so did my dad.
"Thank you for being here for my Jo." my dad said to her.
When Ava and I got back into my car I looked at my dashboard. It was already past midnight.
"Do you want me to drive us back?" Ava asked me, "You must be exhausted."
"I am, but I will drive." I said, starting my car. "This drive back is about to feel a lot different than the drive here."
And it did. It felt much more peaceful. There was hardly anyone out on the highway, and I played music as I drove Ava and I back to her house. When we finally got there, and went up to her bedroom, it was like we were both sexually charged. I think we just needed a release from this emotional night.
I was on top of Ava, we were both naked, and I was about to start making my way further down with my mouth when she shook her head. "No."
"Is something wrong?" I asked her.
"Let me take care of you." she said, getting out from under me.
"You know I like to do that for you." I said, kissing her neck.
"I don't care right now. Ava said, "Get on your back and relax."
There was something really hot about her taking control so I did as she said. And she started kissing me, and then made her way down lower. By the excitement I was feeling between my thighs, I knew I wasn't going to last long when she got her tongue down there.
"Fuck." I gasped as she used her tongue lightly on me.
I looked down at her. She looked like she was thoroughly enjoying going down on me.
As I predicted, I didn't last very long. I grabbed on to her hair as I came, my back arching.
"Are you going to let me return the favor?" I asked her as she came up to kiss me.
"I am horny just from watching you cum." she said in response, and I grabbed her legs and moved her up toward me.
"Ride my face." I said.
Ava had done this before, but she raised her eyebrows at me. "Are you sure?"
"Of course." I said, grabbing her thighs. I wanted all of her in my mouth.
It didn't take her long to cum either.
"Oh...my god." she said, moving back and forth and I could feel my face getting wet.
After we finished we laid down next to each other. "I love you." I said, looking at Ava. "I'm sorry this Valentine's Day didn't turn out exactly as planned."
"Don't even think about apologizing." Ava said to me, "I had a wonderful night with you, despite the detour."
I laid there for a moment in the darkness.
"What are you thinking about?" Ava asked me.
"I really have to find April." I said, "It's fucking killing me, everything being unanswered."
"I know it is."
"I'm going to kick this into high gear. I need to find her. Whether she is dead or alive." I said, getting chills.
"I'm going to help you." Ava said to me.
"We are going to solve this." I said. I was determined. More than I had been for anything in my entire life.