a.n. don't forget to comment and vote

• • •

Harry Styles

As much as living in New York was something I enjoyed, there was no way it could have compared to London. It was my home, it was the place where I felt most comfortable and it truly dawned up on me how much I missed it when I woke up in my own bed. Not that I could enjoy it for a long time because by the time I got myself out of the sheets, I had to be ready and in the back of the car, on my way to the destination of the party.

Renleigh was supposed to be ready by the time I got to her place but she made me wait ten extra minutes. I sat in the car in my pink suit because as far as Zayn knew, I wanted him to have a girl even though I knew he was gonna have a boy. I had no idea why it affected me so much but it did and I just prayed that I would have a girl first. I just wanted a mini Renleigh, I needed her in a cute, baby version, everything about her mushed into a tiny creature. I wanted her to have her mummy's eyes and her cheekbones, I wanted her to have her mummy's smart mind and outlook on life and chances so when she finds something, she is so passionate about, she is ready to take on the world.

"How rude is it that my man can't even open the car door for me?" I heard her voice from right next to me, her perfume all around me in an instant. The car started up and we were on our way.

"Hey," I smiled at her and pressed a kiss on her lips, my right hand on her thigh closest to me. I couldn't help but squeeze her flesh hidden under the material of her blue trousers that matched the blazer she wore as well as the lacy top. She had a massive belt around her waist which made her sit up straight and it was the funniest thing ever. Although, this meant that her chest was all out and, in my face, and I could only think of burying my face between her pretty tits later tonight.

"Wipe the smirk off your lips," she commented although her attention was somewhere else.

"Can I not appreciate my breathtakingly gorgeous girlfriend?"

"You are sucking up to me... you want something."

Damn it.

"I'm complimenting you," I argued.

"You said breathtakingly gorgeous. You only use those two words together when you want something."

"That's not true."

"So, you don't want anything?" she asked.

"Don't put me on the spot like that, woman!"

"You know, for a man as confident as you are, you definitely shy away from asking for something you want."

"Maybe because even a year later you intimidate the fuck out of me," I rolled my eyes as I leaned my head against the head rest, my knees apart. I kept my hand on her thigh and drew little circles on it. I knew I was going to have to stop touching her and having my arm around her during the party—mostly because we were the hosts—and so I enjoyed this moment while I could.

"That's not my problem."

"You sure as shit don't make it easy for me," I said.

"I thought you liked a challenge and I have been told I'm one."

"Yes, I do and you are," I nodded. "Guess I'm sorted for life."

"Good for you," she commented in a cocky tone and it made me smirk. "Now, tell me what you think Zayn's reaction will be when he finds out he's not having a girl as his first born."

• • •

There were so many of Zayn's and Charlotte's friends and family and it felt so weird to be around people who I didn't know. I mean, they had all these people in their lives and Ren and I were the lucky ones who got to plan this whole thing and be the godparents for the little guy.

Speaking of the little guy, everyone was over the moon when the news were revealed. I even saw Zayn tear up as he hugged his girlfriend and he barely wanted to let go of her. It was one of the purest and most beautiful moments I have had the chance to be a part of. He was so, so happy and so was she and I really couldn't have thought of other people who deserved this more than them.

The party was an overall success and everyone left in a good mood. A good few people came over and thanked Ren and I for everything we did and continue to do for Zayn and Charlotte and that was one of the best parts of the night.

Later, when there was only four of us, I walked over to my girl and Charlotte talking, Ren with a glass of wine in her hand. I had no idea where she got it from but she was drinking it and laughing at whatever they discussed. I could tell she had fun today, it was a very relaxed time even though it felt fast paced.

Charlotte excused herself when she caught me coming, smiled at me as she passed and that left me alone with my girl.

"Hey, handsome," Renleigh grinned at me and placed her arms around my neck as soon as she spotted me. Her perfume smelt strong and it made me feel at peace because it was the Renleigh scent I loved. "You prepared for smelly nappies?"

I chuckled and shook my head then instead of answering, I kissed her pretty lips. I wanted today to be over and done with so we could go home and just cuddle in bed until we fall asleep. I felt the jetlag tug on me and no amount of sleep or staying up was able to turn my body-clock to adjust to the time difference.

"I, uh, I wanted to tell you something but seeing how tipsy you are, I don't think it's the right time," I mentioned. My words made her eyebrows dip and head tilt to the side gently. She was curious and I knew I shouldn't have said anything at all because she was going to bug me until she pulled it out of me.

"Share," she asked.

"Uh... later, yeah?"

"Can I guess at least?"

"Sure," I allowed.

"You won't come back to New York with me, right?" damn it. How the hell did she hit the nail on the head? I didn't give her any clues as to what I would want to talk to her about and yet she just read me like an open book. "Shit. I'm right, aren't I?"

"Yes."

"Damn it," she whispered and then pressed her lips into a thin line, not happy about the fact that she was right.

"The thing is that I didn't want to tell you here because it didn't feel right but keeping it from you for so long was also something that didn't feel right," I explained. "How did you manage to guess it, anyway?"

"Well..." she sighed and dropped her arms from around me. I watched her sit down and adjust her belt so it didn't cut into her stomach. Then, she leaned back on the chair, legs apart and her hands between her thighs. "It was bound to happen. I'm tied to being in New York for at least another year to ensure that everything runs smoothly and I want to be the one who brings in new clients and gets that branch going. Then... I guess after that I'll be okay with handing it off to someone else to look over. And I just can't force you to stay with me and work from there when you are probably needed in person."

"I would never ask you to stay home with me, either and you know that. But I have to stay and sort things out with my employees. I could manage paper work from New York but there are some meetings that have to be had and I usually do sit in for performance reviews so I am needed."

"What do you want me to say?" she shrugged. "I get it. You have to go and do your job. I can't stop you from it."

"I'm glad you understand," I reassured. "And trust me, I will be visiting you if I don't end up going back for a while but I have a feeling we'll both be so swamped with stuff to do that we won't even realise we miss each other."

"Wrong."

"Hm?"

"I miss you already," she pouted. "I always do. You know that."

"I do," I smiled at her softly. I squatted down in front of her and placed my hands on her knees to keep my balance. Her fingers ran over mine and she knocked her nail on one of my rings then sighed and looked back up at me. "But we will be fine. We are always fine."

"True," she nodded. "As long as I won't have to pretend that you broke up with me, I think I will manage to get through work without driving myself insane."

"Speaking of which—I spoke to your PA a lot and we came up with the idea that he will be giving you orders on what you need to do as opposed to you giving him orders."

"No."

"Just listen to me," I sushed her when she tried to argue. I knew she didn't like the sound of it.

"No way, Harry. I'm the boss for a reason—hate being told what to do. Not gonna let him boss me around."

"Baby..."

"I don't want to fight over this so I'm just going to let this go," she said quickly. "I'm gonna say bye to Z and Charlotte and then meet you at the car, yeah? Too tired to stay any longer."

So that's what she did. I stayed there for a while and looked around. The staff already began to pack up the place, clean it up and all. Today was nice. Even though I had to fight my jetlag, it really was good to see all of our hard work in person and everyone liking it. Then, I did the same as Renleigh and said goodbye to the lucky parents-to-be. I couldn't lie, I felt a tiny bit jealous because every time someone is able to start a family and it is successful, that's a wonderful thing. I thought I was ready—mentally and financially. Those were the most important things, at least to me. But I knew Renleigh couldn't have thought of anything worse than a baby right now so I didn't even bother bringing it up,

The ride home—this time back to my place—was quick or maybe I just dozed off in the car because all I remembered was sitting in the backseat then getting out. The first thing I did was lay down on the couch and give my feet some time off. I had been on them all fucking day and I felt them pulsate as I laid there. I was all peaceful and shit when my phone went off and it was on full volume since I wanted to make sure I heard it at the party.

"Yes?" I mumbled as I held it to my ear with only my index finger holding it. I had my left arm over my eyes, the bend of my elbow right on them.

"You coming up?" Renleigh asked in a tired, muffled voice. It sounded like she was half asleep and half-awake which was honestly the same situation I was in. I could have easily fell asleep on my couch. 

"Need to shower," I replied just as slowly. I was laying in the dark and it would have made it just that much easier for me to give in to the temptation.

"Hurry then."

"You in bed?" I asked.

"Mhm."

"Showered?"

"Yep," she mumbled. "I'm really knackered all of a sudden. Can you come cuddle me for god's sake?"

"I'm sweaty... help me shower?"

"I'm in bed."

"How did you shower so fast?"

"With water?"

"Oh."

"Do you have a stuffed animal or something I can cuddle?"

"Yeah."

"For real?"

"Mhm-hm."

"Where?"

"In my wardrobe," I replied.

"Too far," she said. "Well, goodnight then."

"No," I cried. "Come down here, please."

"Fuck off."

"Pretty please pretty girl."

"Repeating the word pretty won't make me do anything."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"So, you're not coming down, then?"

"No."

"Can you wait for me until I shower?"

"Keep me on," she yawned. "Talk to me while you undress."

"You want to have phone sex?"

"Oh, baby yeah," she moaned mockingly and I chuckled under my breath. "Tell me... are you wearing your stripey boxers or your sheep one?"

I actually decided to look because I felt like she got me. And when the coloured lines under the band of my pink trousers got my attention, I had to laugh.

"Stripe, baby."

"Ugh, so sexy," she carried on. "What about your socks? Do they match?"

"No... just black and mysterious," I replied in a seductive voice.

"So sexy," she groaned. And then burst out laughing. I followed after her soon enough and we were just laughing in the house, our annoyingly loud voices mixed together. I could hear her from upstairs and I knew she could hear me. "Okay—I'm really so tired. Feel like I haven't slept in eight days and three hours."

"That's oddly specific."

"I can be more specific if you want me to be."

"The only 'you to be' I want you to be is my soon to be wife."

"Sounds dreamy."

"I can see you walking down the isle in a tight fitted dress, titties out and proud with a diamond necklace around your neck. Your dress wouldn't have a back and your hair would be out but like the top would be nicely done, you know. Like a crown type of thing... can't explain it but I'll show you a photo when I can be arsed to go upstairs."

"Nah, think it'd be in a pony tail but like in a nice pony tail. Like, loosely styled but something that looks really pretty and professionally made. And then a few strands left out and curled or something. I don't know."

"What about your dress?"

"Definitely one with straps and like a balcony kind of bra bit. I would be the one to flash in front of all of our families if I had a strapless dress, trust me," she scoffed. "Somehow, I'd trip or try to lean down or something and boom—tits on show with piercings and all."

"That would be hot—I mean, not in front of kids and grandparents and parents and friends. But privately. Just getting you out of the dress finally and fucking you into marriage. Yeah. Probably gonna do that for the whole month of our honeymoon."

"So, we're still going for a month?"

"Yeah... we can always extend it if we want to," I mumbled. "Lately, I've been wanting to go to Japan. I mean, I have been before and I loved it there. I know my way around, sort of, so if we do decide to include it in our itinerary then I will be your tour guide."

"Thought you'll fuck me into marriage and all throughout our honeymoon?"

"I mean, we can have on an off days? One day inside, one day out."

"How would I walk?" she asked back. "You can be rough sometimes."

"Hm... I guess then we'd spend two days inside and one out."

"I don't even want to think about how many boxes of condom we'd need, fucking hell," she chuckled. "We go through a box in two weeks if we're both free."

"So, we'll need two boxes. Or maybe none."

"Oh, no, you wanna knock me up on our honeymoon?"

"I can try?"

"Please, don't," she laughed. "I think I'd wanna enjoy being married if we ever get around to it. I do think people rush it sometimes either because they are already pregnant or have a kid or because they want to start a family as soon as possible but they need to be married for that."

"I know what you mean."

"Also, if I ever say yes to you, I don't want a wedding literally the next week. I kind of just want to enjoy the bliss of being engaged and get used to the idea of us actually tying the knot," she explained slowly, her voice deeper than it was when she called me. We were both extremely tired yet sleeping without the other just felt weird.

"Does that have anything to do with your last time failing miserably?"

"First of all, how rude of you to bring that up," she fought me jokingly. "Second of all, I didn't even think of that until you mentioned it. So, I don't think it has anything to do with it. I have always wanted to stay engaged longer before getting married. I like things like that spaced out, I don't see why we'd need to rush if we're already okay with the idea of spending the rest of our lives together."

"True."

"I know."

"Are you still not coming down to sleep here with me?"

"When I have your massive bed with this soft ass mattress all to myself? It smells like you, too, so I think I will be fine. I can make myself believe you're in bed with me."

"Do you do that a lot? Imagine me sleeping next to you when I'm not."

"Well, we have been sleeping together more than not so I don't have to use my imagination a lot. Then again, you're like a fucking radiator sometimes when you cling to me."

"I do not cling to you!" I got defensive.

"You wrap yourself around me like a fucking koala please just accept it before I go down there and smack you."

"You always wanna hurt me," I pouted. "But I'm down if you'll come sleep here."

"That was a nice one, didn't even realise I gave you the chance there," she chuckled. "But no. Goodnight, Styles."

"No!" I shouted. And then Dax barked. "If I shower quick, will you wait up for me?"

"You asked me that already and I said I would if you keep me on the phone."

"You're gonna fall asleep, won't you?"

"Probably."

"Damn it," I mumbled. "I think I'll sleep down here and shower in the morning. Too tired to get up."

"Whatever floats your boat. You're not sleeping next to me so you can shower whenever you want," she let me know. She had this thing about showering and smelling fresh and to be fair, I did, too. It was basic hygiene. But sometimes, I was just exhausted to the point where I couldn't give a fuck.

"You could've waited for me..."

"Don't start this with me."

"M'just saying."

"Hm."

"You already sleeping?"

"Trying to."

"Without saying goodnight to your favourite person?"

"I said goodnight over three hundred and sixty-one times."

"That was specific, too."

"It was," she muttered. "Night, I love you."

...

I'm sorry.

What?

I heard her slap her hand on her mouth and a sudden movement was also something that I could make out through the phone. She most likely sat up in bed when she realised what she said and I was in the same position.

"You-," I started.

"Shit," she mumbled.

"Wow."

"I-,"

"I will literally kiss you in one," I started counting as I ran towards the stairs. "Two," I carried on once I was up them all and ran along the hallway until I reached my bedroom. "Three," and then I jumped on my bed, threw my phone on the side and kissed her a bit too harshly. My teeth bumped into hers and I somehow managed to trap my lip between them so it hurt like a motherfucker.

"You idiot," she slapped my shoulder as she pressed her fingers against her mouth.

"You just said those words and I know you meant them and felt them all along but hearing them... Renleigh, I don't know if I-could I... could you maybe please say them again?" I asked hurriedly, excited over the thought of being able to hear her say them to my face.

I turned on the bed side lamp and shook off my blazer that landed somewhere on the floor.

"I..."

"Yes," I nodded with eyes wide and heart ramming in my chest.

"Need you to get in the shower," she burst out laughing and I groaned as I fell back on the bed.

"Renleigh," I grunted. She was messing with me because she knew she could.

"I'm kidding!" she poked my stomach. She then quickly leaned down to my ear and chuckled before she whispered, "I love you."

I glanced up at her, my mouth slightly apart with a soft grin spreading across it and making me close it fully. This was the moment I have been waiting for, for so long. For her to finally have the courage to tell me she loved me. Knowing she did and hearing it from her, hit differently. It was more impactful, it had much more meaning somehow. Coming straight from her mouth, it felt like the nicest three words ever spoken.

"I'm sorry—what did you say? Didn't quite catch that," I replied with a grin on my face.

"I said: I love you," she repeated with the same facial expression.

"Goddamn it, that is the best thing you have ever said to me."

"Is it really?" she scrunched up her nose. "Think I've said better things."

"Nah, impossible," I denied. "That one phrase outdid all of them... mind saying it one more time?"

"I love you," she smiled. "I love you. I love you. And, Harry?"

"Yes, baby?"

"I love you."

• • •

a.n.

that was highkey one of my favourite parts to write like it was so married behaviour and they just adore and know the other so much ugh who would have thought miss 'do i look like i need one' would be so in love with a mans and mr 'nothing but a competitor' would be wanting to knock her up every other hour of the day but in a loving kinda way

tears luvs.... there are tears.

also harry on the cover of rolling stone...... magical. we're eating good. we will be eating good. hs2 is coming 😴

xoxo