Harry Styles

She kissed me.

She fully leaned in, placed her sweet lips on mine and boom.

We kissed.

In my uncle's kitchen.

Just five minutes ago.

I still felt her lips on mine, the way they tingled against each other and they felt hot. Much like when I ate chili peppers and they put my mouth on fire. It felt just like that. It was madness. I thought about kissing her too fucking much and now it happened. I actually felt her lips on mine.

Even after we kissed, I still did. And I wanted to. Over and over and over and over again. So badly. But I had no idea if I could. What if it was only the wine? Hell, I knew it was the wine. She would not have kissed me had she been sober.

"Hal! Pick me up, can't see," my sister tugged on my shirt to get my attention once I was outside. Literally everyone was there, singing Happy Birthday to Romeo.

Family things were mad.

Curiously, I looked around the crowd – it was literally a massive sea of people surrounding my cousin – to find Kensington. With my sister in my arms and somewhat singing with the others, I felt my smirk grow on my lips once she got in my line of vision. She stood with my brother, her arm around his shoulder and his around her waist.

Why did that make my heart go crazy?

They both looked so comfortable around each other and like they had known each other for ages. Kensington seemed really relaxed and happy and so fucking different to how she was usually. There was not a single crease on her forehead or a line between her brows from furrowing them so much. There was no sign of a scowl or a grimace. It was all clear and smiley and so... different.

Had I known all she needed was to be around a family and attend a gathering, I would have freaking planned one for her. But I didn't. Because I knew nothing about her. Other than the few things she liked and enjoyed. It seemed as though she was a family person yet I had never seen a photo of her with her parents or brother – because she has a brother, too. I didn't even know his name.

And yet, she was out here being proper mates with my siblings. She knew so much about me but nothing at the same time. I let her in so close in such a short amount of time that it kind of scared me. I mean, she was around my family. My close family. Mother, father, siblings, grandparents, cousins...

"I fucking love your girlfriend," Mason said as soon as he walked up to me. I rolled my eyes and sighed, my arms crossed and he smirked. "No. Really. She smells good, too."

"She's not my girlfriend, Mason," I told him, slightly annoyed. At him. At the fact that she really was not my girlfriend.

"I might ask her out... she's so clever even when she's pissed. And she's stunning. Her eyes are all glossy and bring out the green in the-," then he quickly shut up as his eyes averted from me. Next to me. "Heyy", he said, a bit embarrassed.

Fuck off.

He had a proper crush on Kensington.

"I saw someone mix vodka in a massive jug of orange juice. Let me tell you, I'm buzzing," she laughed and my eyes widened. Like, they actually grew wider. The way she just... changed because she was pissed was so different. I mean, yeah, she got tipsy when we were in Italy and that day, she was cranky. But now... "Mason, you're sixteen, right?"

"Yeah. Why?" he asked curiously. Oh, no. Hell fucking no. She was not about to give alcohol to my brother.

"Kensington," I called her name and she whipped her head in my direction. She tilted her head, a cheeky smile on her lips as she tried to act like she wasn't about to do what we all knew she was about to do. I shook my head disapprovingly.

"Oh, come on!" she rolled her eyes. "When was the first time you had your first drink?"

"That doesn't..." I began.

"Exactly. Lay off of him," she sighed.

"Excuse me?" I asked, a little offended. The fact that she wanted my brother to consume something alcoholic was just maddening to me.

"Do you really think he hasn't had a drink before this? Or even today?" she laughed at me. "Handsome, I may be pissed off of my arse but I know a tipsy boy when I see one... wait, that sounded wrong. Anyway. I just mean that you shouldn't be so hard on him if you know you were in the same boat as him once. Or whatever they say. I don't know. I'm not a parent. I'm the cool Aunt, aren't I?" she nudged Mason's arm and he just laughed.

He couldn't do much. I was there. And stared right in his soul.

Why did I just learn that my brother could have potentially drank before? Or even gotten drunk? Also, why did that shock me so much when he had gotten high before? And, obviously, ended up at the hospital.

I still wasn't over that.

"Yeah, no, I don't care," I said flat out, emotionless. "Last time he did something he shouldn't have, I ended up getting a call from a hospital. If I can stop him from getting there again, then I will."

"There's nothing to stop. He already has alcohol in his system. Get over it, Styles," she rolled her eyes. "But whatever. You go lock him up in a cell or something since he can't do shit. I'm gonna go try that drink. Have fun," she threw up a peace sign. A fucking peace sign. And then left.

"Um..." Mason said and I looked at him with a deathly glare in my eyes.

"Shut up," I told him and he did. I reckon even the breath got stuck in his throat. Perhaps this was one of the reasons why I was so hard on him. He was so... uncontrollable sometimes. "I don't want to see you today at all."

"What?" he asked, clearly shocked as his facial expression showed a bit of hurt. It did cause my heart to miss a beat, kind of painfully because I was the cause of his sadness. But it infuriated me.

My little fucking brother was drinking. And smoking weed. What the fuck.

"Are you seriously mad over me having something to drink?" he asked me.

"Yes. And over the fact that you're skipping class to get high with your fucking friends. And for paying for their shit. I'm just overall really unhappy with you and you poor decisions lately," I said, out of frustration. Maybe I went too far with it. But I had to get it out of me.

"Is this really how I can trust you?" he questioned. "Is this really what's going to happen each time I tell you something? Because if so, then you best believe I won't come to you for anything."

"Someone has to put you in your place, Mason. Clearly, our parents don't give a fuck. I'm the closest thing you've had to a father figure in your life in forever."

"That doesn't mean you should throw my problems back in my face! I trusted you with my friends using me and- and- and you're just going to blame me for it? When I thought... no, fuck this," he said with teary eyes and sniffled before he walked off. I yanked his arm back which caused me to turn around and so we swapped positions.

"Don't you dare walk off on me, Mason."

"Why? I don't want to listen to you, Harry. I don't want to hear about how fucking stupid I am, okay? Not from someone who I have always looked up to so much and adore and trusted and love and- and- wanted to be like. Just... no. I don't want to hear you be mean to me. And if you really won't let me do shit then at least give me this one thing: let me walk the fuck off if I feel like you're treating me poorly," he said with silent tears down his cheeks. My heart broke in half at his sad tone and overall appearance.

My words clearly had an impact on him and he didn't take it well.

Before I could have said anything else, he was gone. I swallowed thickly as I closed my open mouth and inhaled through my nose.

How the hell did I manage to piss two people off in the span of five minutes?

Well done, Harry.

To make me feel even more shit, the first thing I saw when I walked closer to the house was Kensington hugging my brother. She had her arms around his upper body and he wrapped his around her middle with his head on her chest and hers on top of his. Again, she showed such a caring side to my sibling and it was so strange. I was truly so used to her cold persona.

"So, when can I meet the wife?" my uncle asked curiously as he took a seat next to me. He had a beer in his hand and he passed me one as well. Usually, I didn't drink beer because it messed with my diet plan but I let it slide for this occasion.

"Why does everyone think I have any kind of relationship with that woman?" I grumbled.

"Oh, no. Trouble in paradise already?" he laughed.

"Please," I sighed. "She's so difficult."

"That's women for you, lad," he roughly rubbed his hand against my shoulder and then leaned back on the swing. "What happened? She seems to be in a proper fun mood. Talked to her before, sound one, that one."

"Yeah... we just had a disagreement. Let's just say she doesn't take shit from anyone."

"Good for her," he said. "Isn't she the CEO you're always pinned against? She runs that Co company, doesn't she?"

"Kensington and Co, yeah," I nodded as I took a sip of my beer.

"Yeah, Vic mentioned how she was wearing one of her dresses today," he told me.

"The fact that my family prefers her stuff over mine is actually alarming," I laughed and he joined.

"Guess I need to sort my wife out, too," he sighed. "How was today, by the way? Is your mother still a pain in the arse?"

"I don't know. I haven't talked to her in ages," I shrugged. "She's your sister. You should know how she is then again, she will never change so – yes. She's still a pain in my arse."

"Honestly don't understand her sometimes," he said in a disapproving tone. "You, Liv and Mas deserve better."

"Yeah, well, we've managed to survive without them this far. I'm sure we'll be fine."

We spoke some more about how shitty of a mother I had, not that she was a better sister. Uncle David wasn't that big of a fan of her but had to somewhat tolerate her because no one wanted to deal with her annoying ass. I know, it's terrible how we talk about her but honestly. She wasn't a good mother. Or sister.

I loved talking to Uncle Dave. He was the father figure for me. I looked up to him a lot and trusted him a lot. I wanted to be like him. Which made me sound exactly like my brother. He felt that way about me. And I disappointed him today.

Somehow, it felt like hours later, but I managed to make it inside. And then I fell asleep on the couch. The drinks I have had and all the food I ate must have had that effect on me plus the sleepless night that I had that happened due to my excitement to see Kensington and spend time with her.

I kind of felt terrible once I woke up. There were no one downstairs. But I heard the telly was on, and other than that it was complete darkness.

"Three and a half hours."

It took me a little bit to recognise the voice. It was Kensington. Dramatically, she turned on the lamp that she sat next to and it turned the living room into an orange coloured room. She sat with her legs crossed, without her boots, in her black socks, jeans and black shirt.

"What?" I croaked.

"You took a three-hour long nap," she told me. "Most of your family is gone home. Your cousins are in bed, apart from Brooklyn. Their parents are in the other living room chatting to Nana Rose and whoever else is still here."

"What about Livvy and Mason?" I asked. Eventually, I sat up only just then noticed the soft, black coloured blanket on my legs. I pulled it up as I crossed my legs and hid my arms under the material as I leaned back.

"Gone, too," she said.

"What did you and Mason chat about?" I decided to ask her. My head was pounding and I thought maybe it was from the alcohol.

"Stuff."

"Like?"

"You."

"Why?"

"Because."

"Elaborate."

"No."

"Why?"

"Why should I?"

"Hah, you broke the chain," I smirked at her and she rolled her eyes.

"Your fault."

"How would it be my fault?!"

"How would it not be your fault?" she asked back.

"It was up to you to carry on with the argument but you decided to mess it up. So, it's your fault."

"That's what your brain wants you to think."

"No, my brain wants me to think about our kiss from before."

"Don't let it," she said right away.

"Why?"

"Because it shouldn't have happened," the words were so casual and basic, it really shouldn't have hurt me. But it did cause my chest to go through some pain. Some serious pain. "Anyway. Your uncle said you can make yourself comfortable on the couch if you wake up but if you won't I should just leave you and get some sleep in one of the guest rooms. I waited, you're awake, you know what's going on so I will see you in the morning when we can leave and get back to our normal lives."

"Hold on, hold on, hold on..." I shook my head as I lifted my arms from under the blanket. My forehead was in creases and my eyebrows pulled together as I tried to process every word that left her mouth.

"I've got no time to wait around..."

"No, fuck, just... just wait," I said. "What do you mean we shouldn't have kissed? What do you mean it shouldn't have happened?"

"It means exactly what I said. It should not have happened," she said easily.

"You kissed me!"

"Yes, I know. What is your point?"

"You kissed me and now you're saying it shouldn't have happened?" I looked at her like she was crazy. She sounded crazy. What the hell was this woman thinking? "Maybe you should've controlled yourself."

"Yeah, maybe I should have," she hummed. "It was all in the moment. It was nothing more than a simple kiss."

"Is that what you think?"

"What else should I think? You're my competition, Styles. There will never be anything between you and I."

"Oh, here we fucking go again with this work shit... I'm honestly so over this."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Every time we go a little out of your comfort zone, every time we do something more than talk about work, you go all bitchy on me. Tell me how I'm nothing but your competition and how I'll never be anything more. Well, why the fuck are you letting me in then? Why the fuck are you agreeing to all these outings with me? You could so easily say no."

"Out of the two of us, you're the one who's letting me in. As for your little outings, I was curious the first time you asked, drunk the second time you asked me and I agreed and now I just felt bad," she spat. That, again, hit a bit hard. She felt bad for me. I didn't need her to feel bad.

"Is that it?" I laughed. "You felt bad? You? Renleigh Kensington? Having and showing emotions?"

"Yes, I did. You said all your friends fucked you off and that's why you asked me. That made me feel bad for you so even though I never do anyone any favours, I thought, why not? I don't leave people in the shit even though they have left me there, countless times. You wouldn't have come to me with this had you not needed someone desperately," she explained. But that wasn't it. That was nowhere near the reason why I asked her.

"Do you want to know something?" I asked her but didn't wait for a response. "My friends didn't cancel on me – I never asked them to come in the first place. I wanted you to come with me. I wanted you here. I wanted to spend time with you, away from work and the busy life we live. When you agreed... fucking hell. When you agreed to come, I thought, okay, maybe this will be good for us – for her, you. But look at us! We're fucking arguing over literally fuck all! How is that even good for anyone?"

"You fucking came at me, all offended when I said we shouldn't have kissed. I don't know why it hurt your ego so much... perhaps because you can't have everyone and everything, I'm not sure. That kiss was a silly, drunken mistake. In case you didn't clock on yet, you are not the first person I've kissed for the fun of it. I have no deep feelings for you, I don't consider you a friend, I don't know you. Hell, I know your brother better than you and I only spent time with that boy properly today."

"Whose fault is that?" I bit back. "Not that you have the right to say that. You know a lot about me. Perhaps not stuff about my past or basic information that friends know about each other. But I let you into my family life. The most important part of my life. You hung out with my siblings, literally the only people who keep me sane and keep me from doing stupid shit. My grandmother, the only woman who had ever really cared for me. My uncle, the only father figure I have ever had in my life. You know them people. You talked to them. They accepted you. They never fucking like anyone I am associated with because they protect me too much. And then there you are, somehow crossed all of their barriers and managed to make them like you."

"How is that stuff to know about you? They are just your family. They are not you."

"But they are the people who shaped me into who I am, Kensington! For fuck's sake. Can you not see how much I fucking wan-, no, fuck off. I'm not even going to bother. Clearly, there's no way I will ever be able to get through your thick skull to make you understand. Let's just call it a night, I'll see you tomorrow when I drop you off at work or wherever the fuck you want me to take you. Because clearly, you don't trust me as much as I trust you – you don't even fucking trust me, I bet." 

Then she left.

Looked me in the eye for a while, then stood up and left.

My head was a mess, it hurt and I was dizzy. I went off on her pretty badly but I was so frustrated. She didn't fucking like the kiss, she didn't fucking like me and she didn't fucking see how much I adored her.

I literally knew nothing about her but I was falling for her. Pretty fucking hard.

The sad thing was that she didn't wait for me at the bottom, to catch me in her arms when the fall came to an end. She just watched me fall and break into pieces.

• • •

a.n.
hehehehehehe soz guys but that kiss was all you's are getting for a bit although wbk that renleigh is difficult she ain't gonna give in that easily 🥵

lmk how u liked it anyway i personally love when mason and liv are included cos they make harry fall for ren a bit more when she interacts w them lol

but anygays the next one is coming on sunday ✌🏼