I met Frank outside his house and smiled when I saw he had a chocolate bar. We split it in half and walked towards the school.

"Let's skip," he said.

"Really?" I asked.

Frank smiled and nodded, walking with me past the school to a park. We sat on the swings and I swung slowly back and forth. The two of us ate quietly, listening to birds chirp.

"I feel bad for leaving Jamia," Frank said.

"Oh, she's sick, it worked out perfectly," I said.

Frank smiled softly, looking around.

"So, let's play twenty questions," he said.

"Why?" I asked as I ate my chocolate.

"I don't know, to fill up this empty silence," he said.

"I like silence," I said.

"Well, I am going to lose my mind so twenty questions," Frank said. "Um, have you ever had a pet?"

"I used to have a lizard," I said. "Um...how many times have you moved?"

"Four times," he said. "Have you ever been to a concert?"

"Yeah, I went to one with Jamia one time," I answered. "Do you actually like it here?"

"Yeah, this place is pretty great," he replied. "How long have you lived here?"

"All my life," I said. "Um...shit, I don't know, we're running out of questions."

Frank sighed, looking down. I couldn't believe how awkward it had come between us in just a few seconds as I chewed on my chocolate. Frank had finished his long ago and was currently playing with the frayed edges of his skeleton gloves.

I finished my candy, stuffing the wrapper into my pocket. It was quiet between us as we both just focused on other things. It wasn't a peaceful silence either, just an awkward one.

We looked up at each other and I bit my lip, looking away. Frank chuckled softly, the chain of his swing clinking gently.

"Tell you one thing I miss," Frank said, "In my old town we had the best fucking ice cream shop ever. It was owned by this old lady and all the ice cream was homemade."

"One time I made homemade ice cream in my chemistry class and it was amazing," I said.

"Let's make some," Frank said. "My mom leaves for work in ten minutes and we can head back to my place then."

I nodded, swinging back and forth. We talked quietly until finally heading back to Frank's house.

"Alright, how do we make ice cream?" Frank asked.

"Look it up I guess," I said.

Frank grabbed his laptop and searched something up.

"You want the recipe for pineapple mint ice cream?" Frank asked.

I scrunched my nose up, shaking my head quickly.

"Well, we probably only have the stuff for vanilla anyways," he said. "Oh my god, it takes an hour? I thought it would only take about twenty minutes."

Frank grabbed the ingredients, laying them out on the counter. It was going great until Frank dumped the cream into the container, making it splatter up onto us. I gasped as Frank giggled.

"Oops," he mumbled.

I scooped up some of the spilled cream on the counter, pushing it into his face.

"Hey!" Frank exclaimed.

He scooped some out and I gasped, going to hurry away from him. Frank chase me around the island until I felt a cold splatter on the back of my neck. I shrieked and turned back to face him. Frank smirked at me, crossing his arms. I wiped the cream off and threw it at him, giggling quietly.

Frank reached for me, grabbing my arm. I went to step backwards but tripped over my own foot, falling backwards as I pulled Frank with me. I landed on the ground and looked up with wide eyes as Frank landed on top of me.

This isn't real.

I must be dreaming.

This kind of shit only happens in the movies.

But yet here we were, him laying between my legs on the floor, the two of us surprised and covered in cream. But yet, Frank didn't move. In fact, he only moved closer. My heart was racing as his head tilted slightly, both our eyes shutting. His lips brushed against mine gently and it was like my brain just went completely numb with feelings.

I could taste the cream on his lips, it was so sweet. Our lips seemed to move in sync together as I tangled my hands in his hair. He held my hips gently, both with need yet affection. There were sparks between us as we kissed, I thought my heart might actually burst out of my chest. For a moment I actually believed Frank, maybe fate is real.

I pushed Frank off me, standing up quickly. I grabbed my phone and my backpack, running a hand through my sticky hair.

"I-I need to go," I said.

"I'm sorry, Gee," Frank said, following me to the door. "I shouldn't have kissed you, I'm so sorry. Please don't go."

I shook my head, walking out the door.

"Gee!" Frank called and I heard him hurrying after me. "Please, let's just talk, don't leave."

Frank grabbed my arm but I turned and pushed him to the ground. He looked up at me, looking both surprised and worried.

"Don't talk to me ever again," I said.

I ran back to my house, sobbing as I shut the door. I don't know why I pushed him away. I loved the feelings of his lips on mine, I loved how safe I felt in his arms.

But there was that small voice inside my head that told me no. Frank was my friend and I didn't want to lose him. He would hate me if he dated me, I would do something wrong, I just know it.

But I don't even get him as a friend anymore. I told him to never talk to me again. Why would I say that?

I sobbed, falling down onto the bathroom floor. Frank's been here barely a month and he already had this much of an impact on me. I couldn't lose him but I already fucked it up. Frank doesn't want me anymore.

I dug through the cabinet and found my small, shiny metal razor. My hands were shaking because I was crying so hard.

I dragged the metal across my wrist, biting my lip from the pain. I let out a small sob as I watched the blood drip down my arm. I cut twice more before my phone rang. I wouldn't have answered it if it wasn't Jamia, she cares about me so much.

"Gee? What's going on?" She asked.

I sniffled, looking down at my wrist. How does she know?

"Frank called to tell me that you two kissed and then you flipped out suddenly, what's wrong?" She asked.

"I-I cut," I whispered.

I heard rustling on the other end before the call disconnected. I hugged my knees to my chest as I sobbed heavily. I heard the front door open and Jamia ran in.

She was still in her pajamas, her hair a mess. She looked pale and her nose was a bit red, she was definitely still feeling pretty sick.

"What are you covered in?" She asked, kneeling beside me.

"C-cream," I whimpered.

Jamia turned on the shower and helped me get undressed. She cleaned and dried me off, bandaging up my wrist. She kissed my temple gently and I sniffled.

"You're okay," she whispered. "I've got you, Gee."

Jamia got me some soft sweatpants and a big hoodie and the two of us curled up in my bed together.

"Why?" She asked. "It seemed like you were really starting to like Frank."

"I don't know," I cried. "I just got so scared. I-I like him, I don't want him to break my heart."

"He wouldn't do that," she said, holding me in her arms.

I sobbed, burying my face into the crook of her neck.

"I don't know why I did it," I sobbed.

"Let's call him over," Jamia said.

I shook my head, hugging her tighter.

Oh god, I don't think I would ever be able to even look him in the eye again. We kissed and it was probably one of the best kisses in my life. And then I stopped it and pushed him to the ground. Why would I do that? Why am I always just so fucking stupid?

"Stupid, fucking stupid," I muttered. "I hate myself, why do I always ruin everything? Why can't I just let myself be happy?"

"You're not stupid," she denies. "You're perfect, you're so perfect. You're just guarded is all and that's perfectly understandable, you don't want a repeat of freshman year."

Freshman year was awful. There was a guy at school who asked me to the prom. He was a senior and the little freshman me was so excited that someone like him could possibly have an interest in me so of course I said yes.

But that left me standing outside my house all dressed up in my suit. He was supposed to pick me up, he was supposed to pick me up. He never came, though. Instead, his friends drove by and shot me with water guns full of piss and fake blood, filming and posting the whole thing.

After that I never let anyone get close to me like that again. I didn't want my heart broken, I was so humiliated I didn't return to school again for two weeks. It surprised me when I let Frank in so quickly, like he meant something to me in just a month. Maybe Frank was right, maybe fate is real.

"You're perfect, Gee," Jamia whispered. "And I love you more than anything else in the world. Every single inch of you is perfect. I love you, Gee, and Frank cares about you too. Maybe you can just let him in, he won't break your heart. And even if he tries to break your heart then I'll punch him in the face."

I let out a sound that was a mix of a sob and a laugh. Jamia held me in her arms until I calmed down, falling asleep slowly.