I can't wait until winter is over omfg my car got stuck in the snow today I had to get out and push it hella early in the morning and someone behind me came and helped thankfully but I'm gonna slide into a ditch and die I swear I already almost took out a stop sign after sliding completely across an intersection

~~

Frank reached over to hold my hand under the table and I quickly pulled my hand away. He looked a little sad but didn't say anything as the teacher continued on with the lecture. Class ended and I sighed as we walked out of the room. We went outside and started walking back home.

"I'm sorry for not holding your hand," I said quietly.

"It's okay, I know you're not really into PDA or anything," Frank said.

"I-I just wish I could hold hands with you in public and kiss you without feeling like I would throw up," I said.

"It's fine, Baby, I'm just glad to be with you at all," he said. "Come on, let's go home and play some video games or something."

"I don't know, I have homework to do," I said.

"Are you sure?" Frank asked. "We can go order a pizza and drink soda."

"I'm fine, I-I just kinda wanna go home," I said.

"Alright, are you sure you're okay?" Frank asked nervously.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said.

I smiled, looking around before I gave him a soft kiss.

"So you're really fine then?" He asked nervously.

"I'm fine," I insisted.

"Alright, call me if you need anything at all," he said.

I nodded, giving Frank one last kiss before I walked inside my house. I looked around and found it unsurprisingly empty. As soon as I was in my room I flopped down onto my bed, closing my eyes.

It felt like years before I actually opened my eyes again but when I looked at the clock I saw it had only been fifteen minutes. I looked out my window into Frank's room, watching him play guitar. I cracked my window open and I could hear him through his open window. He was singing and it sounded so beautiful.

I watched him like I was caught in a daydream. He was even more beautiful than his music. He was enchanting almost, I couldn't stop watching. I smiled softly as I watched him. He was mine, really mine. For the first time ever I had someone who really cared about me. Someone who liked me just as much as I liked them.

O-or maybe he didn't really like me. Maybe he's just faking all of this.

No, that's stupid, why would he waste his time faking this?

But...what if he is?

I sniffled as I laid down, listening to Frank's music. The song he was playing sounded familiar. What was the name again? Fuck, I don't know. It sounded kind of like a song by the Beatles. Either way it sounded so beautiful. I closed my eyes, feeling like I was in a dream.

I frowned softly when the music stopped. There were soft voices before it was quiet again. I could hear Frank's window up wider.

"Hey, Gerard, my mom made pizza rolls!" Frank shouted out the window. "You want some?"

I couldn't help but giggle as I sat up. God he's such a dork.

"Come on, they're still hot," Frank said.

I smiled, giggling happily as I walked over to Frank's house. He pulled me up to his room where a plate of pizza rolls sat on his desk.

"I heard you playing," I said as I sat beside him on the bed. "It was really good."

"Thanks, I'm trying to practice because the school's having a talent show and I thought I might audition for it," He said. "What do you think? Is it just a waste of time?"

"You'd be amazing," I said.

"You should join me, you can sing while I play guitar," he said.

"N-no, I can't," I denied. "That's really not my thing."

"You would be amazing up on that stage," he said.

"No, I-I can't," I denied.

Frank smiled and gave me a soft kiss. I felt my heart flutter and I rest my head on his shoulder. Frank turned on some funny videos on his laptop while we ate. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and I could feel a small blush form on my face.  I looked over at him, smiling softly.

"You're really pretty," I mumbled.

"You're really pretty too," he said.

I smiled, cuddling up close to him as we watched videos on youtube.

"I think we should just watch videos of cute little kittens," Frank said. "Everyone just needs cute little kittens to make everything seem better."

"You like kittens?" I asked.

"Yeah, but I guess I'm really more of a dog person," he said.  "When I grow up I just wanna play music and get a bunch of dogs, that's my dream."

"Dogs and music, I can get on with that," I said.

"Good because you're in my dream too," Frank said. "It'll just be you, me, dogs and music."

I smiled happily, looking over at Frank.

"That sounds perfect," I said. "I-I really couldn't think of anything better."

"Soon we're gonna be living together in a little house and I'll be a psychologist and  you can take care of the dogs and then we'll get married and maybe even have some kids too," he said. "Do you want kids, Gee?"

"Yeah I guess, maybe only one or too," I said.

"I could imagine the two of us adopting a little kid," he said. "I can imagine us all cuddled up on the couch watching movies and on Christmas morning and getting family matching costumes for Halloween."

I chuckled softly, as he ran his fingers through my hair.

"I can't wait until I have cute little kids running around the house," he said. "Maybe two or three. Although my mom always told me to never have three kids because then you have a middle kid and she was a middle kid growing up and apparently it sucked. So she always tells me that I can't have three kids because then one would be the middle child. But I don't know, I'm not really gonna adopt the number of kids just based on my mom's opinions. I've always wanted kids, I've wanted kids ever since I was a kid.

"I remember when I was little my favorite game used to be 'daddy', which people nowadays have practically changed the entire meaning of the word. But anyways, I used to have this one baby doll when I was a little toddler and I would pretend to be its dad and take care of her. I used to carry her around everywhere. At the foot of my bed I had a pillow and every night I would lay her on it and use a little blanket and tuck her in."

"That's adorable," I said with a small chuckle.

"Yeah, I've just always wanted kids," he said. "I think they're the sweetest."

I held his hand and he smiled, giving me a kiss.

"Can I listen to you play?" I asked.

Frank smiled and nodded, going over to sit in his desk chair as he picked up his guitar. I bit my lip, watching his hands on the strings as he played. He wasn't singing and I wasn't sure why but decided not to question it. Frank closed his eyes and I smiled, he looked so at peace like this. I could really see him doing this for a living.

"You should start a band," I said.

Frank stopped playing as he looked over at me.

"We should start a band together," he said. "I've heard you sing, you're good. You can sing and I can play guitar. Maybe it'd just be like a two man band. We can get married and be just like The White Stripes."

"You know they got divorced, right?" I asked.

"Oh, I didn't actually know that," Frank said. "Okay, maybe we can just start a band and get some other people to join too."

"Who else would join?" I asked. "In case you haven't noticed not many people like me."

"Jamia can join," he said.

"She doesn't play an instrument," I replied

"We can teach her to play drums," Frank said. "I know a bit and I've got my grandpa's old drum kit upstairs in the attic."

"Yeah, I'm not sure if she's gonna be down with that," I said.

"We can put some posters up at a nearby college," he said. "O-Or maybe when I go off to university I can ask some other people who are in the music program down there if they wanna join our band."

"I-I don't," I mumbled. "I'm not really so good at performing in front of people."

"Baby, you have a beautiful voice," he said, moving over to sit next to me on the couch. "And I bet you that people would pay millions and millions of dollars just to be able to hear you sing."

"No they wouldn't," I mumbled.

"Are you kidding me? You're one of the best singers I have ever heard," he said. "I bet you would be an amazing performer. Imagine being onstage, lights on you as crowds full of people cheered for you and sang along to the songs you wrote, knowing every single word by heart. Imagine being able to help people through your music."

I smiled softly, holding his hand.

"But I thought you wanted to be a psychologist, not a musician," I said.

"I do want to be a psychologist but I also just want to be a musician on the side," he said. "I wouldn't do, like, really long, month long tours or anything like that but I could release music and do local shows and occasionally just go away for weekends to do shows farther away."

I smiled, giving Frank a kiss.

"I-I don't know," I said quietly. "I don't know if I would really be able to do all that. I mean, I've never even written a song before and now I would have to write an entire album? I couldn't even stand the poetry units in school. I don't know how to write a song."

Frank chuckled, squeezing my hand.

"Don't worry, we can write them together, I'll help you," he said.

I sighed quietly. "C-Can I think about it?"

"Of course you can, you don't have to join a band with me, it was just an option," he said.

I smiled, giving him a soft kiss. Maybe everything really could be perfect in the future, maybe I can really be happy with Frank.