Sirius' death meant that Remus went along in life without thinking, now.

He ignored the ache deep in his throat, the burn in his head. If his fingers shook now and then, no one said anything.

Because everyone knew.

Tonks watched him through the corner of her eye, a few months after the battle in the Ministry. Except was it really death, if the spell's light had been red?

Although she was still weak from the fight, Tonks tried to look after Remus. Tried to make sure he didn't fall behind his own veil as he turned away from the one sticking to his thoughts.

He was so thin. Thin, pale, broken - he was a manifestation of agony. His bones pressed through his skin, his eyes blank and tired.

And it hurt. Tonks couldn't bare seeing him hurt like this.

"Remus?"

"Yes?" he replied absently.

A sad smile tried to touch her face. "You can talk to me, you know."

There was a moment of waiting, his back turned to her, his shoulders tight. "I can't talk to anyone."

"I know," she whispered.

"No, I don't think you do." He faced her, clearly exhausted. "I don't think anyone knows, not really."

"You loved him."

"That obvious?"

"And he loved you," she added quietly.

He froze, then exhaled. Turning fully, Remus let a smile pass through his face. "I know."

***

They didn't mention it again, not until almost a year later. But they talked of other things - distractions, meagre distractions, and yet his hair seemed to grey a little slower.

Tonks studied the wedding ring on her finger. It was plain gold, a small inscription on the inside in a language she didn't know.

Remus sat on her left, reading. His hand rested beside hers - they were barely touching.

Of course, they both knew Remus didn't love her, not like he loved Sirius. His heart had been taken away to somewhere beyond anyone's reach, never to be touched again.

But Tonks knew she didn't love him, either. And yet between them was a small string of hope, of support, that they wound around their fingers and kept close to them.

It wasn't love in the all encompassing sense. It was barely love at all. But in a weird way, it was still enough. Enough to keep him alive and her sane.

"What does it say?"

He looked up. "Sorry?"

"It says sorry?"

"What says sorry?"

She blinked, and tried again. "What does the ring say?"

Realisation dawned on his face. "Oh, that." He turned back to his book.

Tonks waited for further reply. "Well?"

Smirking, Remus turned a page. "You'll just have to find out."

She huffed, scowling at the floor. He said nothing, but let their fingers brush together just a little more.

***

Tonk didn't know whether to be angry or not.

Well, she was definitely angry, but she didn't want to be. Because she'd also been afraid, and therefore knew she wasn't in entire control of her emotions.

"Where have you been?" she said quietly, her voice shaking.

Remus stood a few feet before her, head bowed. "I went after them."

"And why did you do that?"

A pause. "I wanted to go with them."

She'd already known that. "And you didn't even consider telling me?"

"You wouldn't have let me go."

"Yes, I would have, actually," she corrected. Her eyes burned. "If you'd asked."

He looked up, startled. "You would have?"

Sighing, she sat down, placing a hand over her bump. "Remus, I know you love them. And they'd be safer with you, and maybe even come back earlier."

"Harry sent me back."

"Of course he did."

"He was right."

She frowned. "About what?"

"I shouldn't have left you." His shoulders shook, and he pressed a hand against his face. "I'm a coward, and I'm sorry."

Tonks watched him as he tried not to fall apart. "Remus..."

"I'm not good enough, Tonks," he whispered, words muffled against his fingers. "I couldn't protect him, or James, or Lily, or anyone, and I won't be able to protect you or our child."

"That's not true."

"You know it is. Anyone who comes close to me gets hurt - I can't let you hurt like that."

She got up (slowly, but she managed) and walked over to him. Remus still covered his face. Tonks could see little rivulets of water slipping down his skin.

"Remus, please look at me."

After a moment, he did. His eyes were bloodshot. "I'm sorry I'm so weak."

"I don't love you," she whispered. His eyes widened, but she kept talking. "At least, not how he loved you. And you don't love me."

"Tonks..."

"But that's okay," she interrupted. "It's okay, because that doesn't mean I can't be here for you. And it doesn't mean you can't be there for me."

A moment. And perhaps another one. Remus swallowed, staring at her, and Tonks stared back at him.

Then suddenly, he leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead. She smiled, placing her hands on his shoulders.

"I'm a mess, aren't I?" he laughed, albeit sadly.

"We're both messes, but we'll be okay."

"Don't bet on it."

"I won't."

***

They were going to die.

They were going to, she knew they were, because that dryness was sticking to their lungs and looking forwards only brought darkness into her vision.

Remus stood beside her, their hands gently held together.

"I'm glad Harry's his godfather," he muttered, readying his wand as they watched the night from a balcony in Hogwarts.

Tonks smiled. "Me too."

The cold slipped beneath their clothes as a cannon echoed in the distance. She shivered, and he stepped a bit closer to her.

"What does the ring say?"

He raised his eyebrows. "It's been almost a year and you still don't know?"

"I've been busy!"

"Doing what?"

"Erm... being pregnant?"

Remus blinked. "Oh, yeah. Fair point."

Another cannon, much closer. And suddenly she was sad, because she would probably never tuck Teddy into bed again or see him get his Hogwarts letter or fall over and scrape his knee or -

BOOM!

It was too close, and she swallowed back her regret. "Remus, tell me what it said."

Footsteps raced across stone flooring somewhere nearby. There was a scream, and then a crash.

Remus lifted his wand, staring at the door. His face was blank.

"Remus, please," she begged. Her heart throbbed in her throat.

"It says thank you." He looked at her, and smiled. "Thank you."

And because she somehow knew that it was their last night alive, because she didn't want to die feeling sad, Tonks smiled back. "Well, then, you're welcome."

With that, they charged through the door, and straight into thick streams of green light.

***

The first thing Remus saw when he woke up again was Tonks smiling at him. That, and a lot of soft, pale light.

"What... are we dead?"

"Yep," she answered cheerfully. "And you'll never guess who's here to meet you."

He wracked his brains. Who would want to meet him, of all people?

Then familiar footsteps fell somewhere to his left. Getting up, Remus turned and his eyes widened. His heart raced faster at the soft smile on the other's face.

"Sirius."