chapter sixty-three
feelings
[anya rose mendes]
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"hey gorgeous, wake up," shawn coos, as i scrunch my face up in confusion, opening my eyes slowly. "happy birthday lovely, come on, i made you breakfast." i smile widely at him, as he leans down, kissing my lips softly.

"thanks shawn," i say to him, slowly getting out of bed, my bare feet sinking into the cream carpet. "i'm sorry i woke you up earlier, little mendes here is getting a little cranky." i say, placing my hands over my abdomen, as shawn laughs, wrapping his arms around my waist, his hands resting over mine.

"little mendes, stop making your mother be sick." shawn laughs, feeling around my hands. "why isn't she moving?"

"shawn we don't even know the gender yet, i don't think i'm even a month into the pregnancy yet." i giggle, as shawn shrugs, walking around me.

"she's gonna be a baby girl, and i get my mini anya." he grins, before pressing a kiss to my cheek, his stubble scraping against it.

"okay then i'm saying he's a baby boy, and i get my mini shawn." i imitate back, following shawn down the steps of our home and into the kitchen.

"god, i can't wait," shawn sighs in bliss, grabbing a plate from the cabinet to lay out my breakfast on. i smile, noticing he's made pancakes, which he's suddenly become really good at making.

actually, he's suddenly become really good at cooking, which is a huge change from when he was 18 and into his early 20s.

"i made extra because i bet avery's pretty hungry in there." he jokes, pushing the plate across the island table, the food landing in front of me.

"well i'm pretty sure liam's pretty hungry in there but anyway." i shrug, imitating him back. "thanks shawn, i'm so glad you can cook now." i sigh in bliss, as i begin to eat the pancakes.

"oh wow, thanks," he says sarcastically, sitting next to me on a bar stool. "so aaliyah's coming over with lucas in a couple hours." shawn mumbles, as i let out a small laugh, rolling my eyes.

"shawn, stop getting annoyed. aaliyah's twenty-one, and you got married at twenty-one, so please lay off her." i laugh.

"she's my little sister, anya." he groans. "you remember when she told us? when we literally got back from our honeymoon?"

"you do realise she told me about him when she was like 15, right?"

"15?" shawn bursts, shocked completely. "15?!"

"oh shawn, calm down, it's not like you weren't interested in girls at 15."

"yeah, with girls who were 16!" he bursts, making me laugh again, as i finish off my breakfast. "i can't believe she didn't tell me."

"shush shawn, this is the reason why she didn't tell you, and it was only a crush back then." i snicker, as shawn groans again, settling down in his seat. "shawn, come on, we first got engaged at 18, then 20, don't be annoyed at her."

"fine." he grumbles, clearly annoyed at me winning this debate. i smirk in achievement, leaning back in my bar stool, and resting my hand over my stomach. shawn sighs, picking up my plate as he leans over me. i grin, leaning up and pressing my lips to his forehead.

"i love you." shawn lets out a smile, looking straight into my eyes.

"i love you," he responds, making me laugh softly. "go get dressed, beautiful, i'll be up in a minute."
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"hey!" i cheer, greeting jasmine and nate, who are being followed by kelsey, peter, a seven year old matthew, and a new addition to the family, a three year old eleanor, clutching onto kelsey's hand.

"happy birthday anya!" matt says, crashing into me with a hug. i laugh, hugging him back as i greet my cousins.

"happy birthday," jasmine says to me, embracing me in a hug. "how's being 26 treating you?"

"well it's been good, let's just say that." i laugh, as they enter the house, matt and eleanor running up to shawn and jumping onto him, making me smile.

"hey mom, come help me in the kitchen with something?" i ask my mom, who's engaging in a deep conversation with karen. "and you too karen." they both turn their heads to me and smile, following me into the kitchen, where i pass shawn and drag him by the hand.

"what do you need help with sweetie?" my mom asks, as shawn links his arm around my waist, and i bite my lower lip anxiously.

"we need to tell you both something before we tell everyone else." i begin, looking up at shawn. he nods at me, sending me a smile. "you two are gonna be grandmothers soon."

"what?" karen shouts in shock, as shawn laughs, quickly quietening her down.

"shh, mum!" shawn laughs, placing his hands on her shoulders.

"how long have you two known?" my mom asks me, a huge smile on her face. "oh my god, congratulations! i'm so happy!"

"we found out last week." shawn answers, a huge smile on his face. "we wanted you two to be the first ones to know."

"i'm so proud of you two." karen smiles, embracing us in her arms. i smile gently, shutting my eyes as my mom joins in with the hug, before the four of us laugh.

"when's your first appointment?" my mom asks, clutching onto my hand.

"tomorrow." i blush, as shawn squeezes my waist gently. "we're going to that and then straight to the airport, since he goes back on tour the day after."

"oh yeah, i completely forgot about that!" karen laughs, as shawn scoffs, rolling his eyes. "if you both need any help what so ever, don't hesitate to call, yeah?"

"got it mum, thank you so much." shawn replies, kissing his mums cheek. "okay, we should really go back into the garden. we're planning to tell everyone after dinner."

"this is so exciting! oh and shawn, make sure your dad helps out with the barbecue." karen laughs, as shawn and i both reply with a chuckle, shawn nodding.

the four of us walk into the garden, shawn leaning down to peck my lips as he mumbles a few words to me telling me he's going to start cooking the meat. i nod at him, before joining aaliyah who's sipping on a drink lightly, laughing at something with jasmine and kelsey. i walk over to them, grabbing a glass of water on my way.

"hey birthday girl." aaliyah teases, nudging my side gently. "how's your day going?"

"honestly great, i'm so glad you guys were able to come over tonight." i smile back, sipping on my water.

"anya where the heck is your wine? it's your birthday!" kelsey jokes at me, as my cheeks flush. i let out a small laugh, before taking another sip of my water.

"not in the mood to drink." i shrug, gazing at shawn who's in a serious conversation with tommy, who surprisingly isn't on his phone. jasmine gasps, putting her wine glass down on the table next to us.

"no way!" she gasps, pushing her hand up to her mouth.

"shh!" i quickly say, pushing her hand further to her mouth so she shuts up. "don't spill it yet!"

"anya!" aaliyah and kelsey squeal, as sophie and poppy notice something going on, the two of them strolling over to us, lauren following them, her two year old clutched to her hip.

"does shawn know?" aaliyah asks me excitedly, putting her drink down.

"know what?" poppy asks us confused.

"anya's-"

"happy that you're all here!" i quickly say, glaring at aaliyah. "have i told you how much i love you guys?"

"anya, fucking tell us." sophie says, folding her arms. i sigh, my eyes moving down to my flat stomach. "holy shit!"

"guys please shut up about it, you're the only ones who know, apart from shawn and i, and our mothers, we're telling everyone else after dinner."

"oh my god!" sophie squeals, hugging me quickly. "i am so happy for you!"

"thanks," i chuckle, hugging her back. "but seriously girls, no spilling it, not even to your significant others."

"got it." jasmine nods, a smile bursting on her lips. "oh my goodness i'm so excited, have you thought about names yet?" we all move to an area of the garden at which no one can hear us talking.

"avery-sierra for a girl, or liam-noah for a boy." i smile, my cheeks pinched pink. "shawn thinks it's a girl, so he's already calling the baby avery."

"that's adorable!" aaliyah squeals. "but you should really call her aaliyah."

"very funny." i roll my eyes, laughing at her. "honestly, i'm pretty sure shawn wouldn't object."

"really? he's already got one aaliyah annoying him, i'm pretty sure he doesn't need another." aaliyah chuckles.

"trust me, he would love another. you're growing up too fast for him." aaliyah and i both look at shawn, who's now shaking hands with lucas, who looks slightly threatened, even though he's taller than shawn.

"oh gosh, excuse me, i'm about to go slap my brother." aaliyah groans, taking her drink and walking straight to shawn, where she hits the back of his head, glaring at him and folding her arms.

"well tonight should be entertaining." poppy smirks, as the rest of us let out a small laugh, whilst shawn gets lectured by aaliyah, and then apologising to lucas shortly after, before excusing himself and walking inside.

"shit, i'm gonna go see if he's okay." i quickly notice, pushing myself away from the group and back inside the house, where i see shawn walking into the living room. i follow him there, as i see him sit down on the couch, placing his head in his hands, as he tugs at his curls.

"hey gorgeous, what's up?" i ask quietly, sitting next to him, and placing my hand on his back.

"she's really grown up." he says softly, as i chuckle softly, moving my hand down to his hand, and clutching it in mine. "anya, she's really grown up."

"shawn, she is 21, she was bound to grow up at some stage." i say reassuringly to him, as he shakes his head, looking up at me with teary eyes.

"she's really being looked after now by another guy, anya, lucas asked me for her hand in marriage." i gasp, smiling sadly at shawn.

"you should be happy for her, shawn. she's in love, and has been for years now." i reassure him, wiping away the tear that has fallen down his cheek. "don't worry, shawn, she'll always be your little sister."

"really? because she just told me that she isn't." he says, his voice cracking at the end. "just because i fucking said no-"

"wait, you said no?" i ask him confused. "why?"

"because i don't want to face the fact she's grown up! heck, i don't want to face the fact i'm 26! that's so old anya, i can't even-"

"shawn, shut up for a second." i chuckle at him, as he sighs, holding back a smile. "you're not old, yeah? you're just tied down at an early age, that's all, and aaliyah's happy with lucas, he treats her well, and she really does love him. if he wants to propose then let him, because i can't think of anyone better to be there for aaliyah when you can't."

"you really think it's like that?" shawn asks in a small voice. i nod, leaning over to kiss his cheek.

"it definitely is like that, now stop crying, and go talk to your sister and your future brother in law, okay?"

"yeah, okay." he sighs, standing up, and kissing my cheek. "thanks anya, i needed that."

"no problem, and remember, i will always be here for you."
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