+-10 more chapters left Fearless Beasties😢😢 Hopefully you guys are still enjoying 😊 ENJOYED reading the feedback on previous chapter 😊😊

"I get you, you don't know how you feel.
Well, I will tell you this...
The world doesn't make much sense
without the people you love"

✘✘✘

"I honestly thought we were done with this" my mom whispered as we moved into the house and well she could tell by my face I wasn't here to have a fun visit.

I had basically left Brock stranded by flying out to my mom and knew I would be having to deal with the Beast once I returned home. I hoped that he would be busy doing whatever he had been doing before he had decided to fulfill my clingy needs by being at home with me everyday.

"I did too, but everything is just too much right now. I just needed to get away.." I shrugged.

"Everything? I must say you lasted longer in isolation than I expected. JJ said you'd be out of there sooner" She frowned and I laughed a bit.

"No, I still love it there. I'm not the one who wants to leave, Brock and I had this fight because he wants to relocate to Canada" I sighed as I sat down on the carpet as she sat with Josie, who I guess she was taking care of while Bryan and Brie were on the road.

"And you don't want that?" She gave a small smile knowing that I obviously didn't.

"I'm happy here mom.." I whispered.

"You thought you were happy in Tampa and San Diego, being close to the beach. Then you moved in with Brock practically on a farm in the middle of nowhere and you have been your happiest there despite your brother giving his input. I saw how much you just enjoyed letting go Nicole. Maybe you will be even happier up there"

I sighed as with the baby coming I figured my mom would be able to come back and spend sometime at the farm again to help me out. I realized it would be her first grandchild so I knew she would want to be involved.

I guess being separated from my mom during that time was one of the reasons I was feeling hopeless. While the others were just floating around right now due to Brock confronting me causing me to actually set them free in my mind.

"I know but uhm I need to tell you something" I whispered realizing maybe I needed to tell someone and speak to someone other than Brock. I was afraid to say certain things to him because I didn't want to hurt him which was too late now as I already had I guess..

"You don't like your ring?" She teased as she glanced at it.

"No I love it, wait did you help him pick it out?" I narrowed my eyes as I had been praising him ever since the morning he surprised me with diamonds instead of gooey sweetness.

"Actually no, he didn't show it to me. So this is the first time I'm actually seeing it. " She smiled.

"Who knew a Beast could pick out a ring?" I smiled staring at it, briefly forgetting that my fiance was somewhere currently pissed off at me.

"Well I didn't think the Beast could be marrying my daughter... what do you have to tell me?" I sighed as we had drifted from it and now I wasn't sure.

I had prevented Brock from telling his parents and now here I was about to tell my mom without him even here?

Let's just add onto the list more ways to upset the man you love , shall we?

"Well let's just keep in mind when he proposed I had not known what I know now. Or we know now, we being me and Brock"

"Okay?" She laughed a bit and I glanced at Josie.

"Well this is something you probably expected from everyone else but me. But I'm pregnant" I gave a small smile.

She placed her hand over her mouth before she pulled me into a hug and I saw her eyes fill with tears. I wasn't sure if that was how I should have broken the news but her reaction just made me smile.

"Oh my word. I am so happy for you Nicole, I knew Brock would give you everything you wanted. He just keeps surprising us, the last we spoke you weren't sure he wanted anything..."

"I wasn't, until all of it just happened.." I shrugged as she leaned back.

"And he is happy about it?" She raised her eyebrow guessing maybe that was the reason I seemed so down.

"Yes, Brock is genuinely happy and I was, I mean I am too. Its just, Brock knows me so well and I thought I have been hiding it well as I have been pushing it so far back in my mind for the last few weeks but he noticed."

"And what did he notice?"

"I'm not truly happy and I feel so bad because I'm not" I croaked.

"Why not?"

I shrugged, "I just had this plan. I had a couple more months to work on myself and I hoped I would be making a return at the Royal Rumble with maybe Brock by my side. I don't know and then this, I just had a plan and now I'm just feeling lost"

"Nicole, sometimes these things just happen. I didn't plan for you and Brie. Here you are and I couldn't be prouder, I know despite this being all you ever wanted it is scary. I don't understand why you just don't express this to Brock. He has two boys of his own, he will understand that you are feeling some anxiety at dealing with this."

I knew what my mom was saying was right but me expressing this to him would only feed his doubts that shouldn't have been there.

"But its not just that, I'm not ready to say goodbye to wrestling. I fucking got stretchered out on my last match, I still have so much to prove. I don't want to close the door on that life, I want to be back there in January on the road and get my title. I don't want to be at home and I feel so bad but there is so much that I haven't done yet."

I felt like screaming out in frustration but I had no energy to.

"You're ambitious and I know that is what Brock loves about you. You want to prove everyone wrong and you did Nicole. You have worked so hard in honour of Pop pop and now look at you. He would be so proud of you Nicole, you have been so successful. You and Brianna ventured into this as a way of distracting yourselves after you lost him and you have grown to love this with everything in you. With you even more so, when things with Nick ended you left the business to get away and wrestled in other promotions and you threw yourself in and made that your first love. Even when you were with John I saw how happy winning that championship made you, the championship was your baby because you were in love with wrestling. But now you are in love with Brock and you are having a real bundle of joy Nicole. Its always been this that you wanted remember that..."

"I'm just afraid that I'll be living with regret because I am not finished. I still have so much more to offer the business mom and I can't do that with a baby. I just feel like I don't deserve to be pregnant right now because I know I am being so fucking ungrateful but I'm just feeling so sad because I might as well have retired the night I gave up my championship" I shook my head as I ran my hands through my hair.

"So are you saying that if you were given a choice between being engaged to Brock and being pregnant or being in the ring with that championship around your waist?"

"Mom..." I sighed.

"I'm just trying to make you see that you have had a championship before, and yes you were happy but not as happy as you are being with him. You are engaged..."

"What if he doesn't really want to marry me? What if he just put this ring on my finger to shut me up?" I questioned as the thoughts consumed me.

"Nicole.."

"Mom, I don't understand what's happening. I went from having a man who didn't want marriage and kids who was meant to be my prince charming but just made my life miserable to being with a Beast who on paper is supposed to do just that but he.."

"He?"

"He makes me laugh, he makes me smile. He makes everything perfect, he proposed in the most unconventional way while I was just normal. Not dressed up, not in a fancy restaurant surrounded by people clapping because you said yes after having a five course meal and..."

"Is that how you always pictured it happening?" My eyes widened and my mom gave a slight smile as I heard Brock's voice.

"Brock. I have to take Josie for a walk so I will see you two later" he gave a nod.

"How did you even know I was here?" I whispered as I wiped my tears.

"After I came back from my walk. Saw the car gone, I gave the pilot a call. I don't know who else you would come to Phoenix for ..."

"So you just walk into my mom's house.." I raised an eyebrow hating that he caught me off guard.

I thought I would have the flight back to work through my thoughts before being confronted by him.

"What's going on Nicole?" He asked calmly as his face gave nothing away.

"I'm honestly just afraid that I will be forgotten about. Out of sight, out of mind. I know I shouldn't be thinking about that while I am carrying our baby but its not you Brock. I love the fact that I am carrying your baby, I love that I am engaged to you. I don't want to have this with anyone else. When I get that look its not because of you its because I am afraid that everything I have worked for , for all these years was just ripped away in one night. And I can't fix it like I planned.." I sniffed and he frowned a bit as he crouched in front of me.

"What are you saying, you don't want this baby?"

"I don't know" I shrugged and I prepared myself for him to get up and leave as I wasn't making sense to myself at all.

I felt his lips on my cheek and frowned, as his fingers wiped them, due to my surprise.

"Come on" he stood up and extended his hand.

"What?" I frowned as I stared up at him.

"We're going to make you some of that tea shit so you can calm down." He sighed and helped me to my feet.

I smiled a bit as we walked into the kitchen and I directed him to where everything was, amused but still unsure how to act or feel as I couldn't get a sense of his mood.

"My mom forced me to make her every fucking day back when I was in high school. Didn't matter how fucking butch I was" he shook his head and I smiled a bit not sure where this was heading.

I just knew Brock making me tea couldn't be ending well.

"Each time I have to remind you of the words you told me when we first began dating. It would just be me and you in this relationship, I get that you maybe feel more comfortable speaking to your mom but I would appreciate it if I were the one you turned to. You expect me to say shit to you but when I question you, you don't answer me and you leave me in a place I would rather not be..." He sighed as he set the cup in front of me.

"I'm sorry, I just didn't want to fight with you. And I didn't want to make you feel like I wasn't happy with you because I am Brock, so fucking happy with you. Its just hard realizing that my happiness comes at a price of me giving up something. If I were to choose I would choose this over anything but it doesn't take away that I feel a bit empty not being able to do what I wanted..." I stared at him hesitantly despite feeling better about getting it all out.

Brock was unpredictable so I couldn't be sure how he would react to my moods and more so what would be going on in that head of his due to them.

"There ain't nothing stopping you from going back to the company after, Nicole. And about the moving shit? I'm sorry I just figured it would be a great place to just raise our kids out of the spotlight"

I nodded slowly as he leaned onto the counter while I had actually forgotten about how it all started. I decided to not get into the fact that he hadn't discussed it with me since he was being so understanding regarding my fears.

"If we move to Canada I just see it as you trying to turn me into Rena. I can't picture myself just being a stay at home mom. Rena is amazing, she is doing her business and all but I can't move up there away from everyone. Rena never loved this business as much as I do but she supported you in everything. And while I will continue to be there for you whenever you return I can't just be a cheerleader for you Brock. On the sidelines.. "

"While picturing you in that outfit gets a rise out of me. I don't want you to be one baby, I know I wouldn't be happy trying to be kept back by something so I get where you are coming from. You are the Female Beast" he smirked.

"You really paid attention during that show?" I rolled my eyes as all traces of my tears were gone once he had wiped them away.

"Yeah, like I said I happen to like listening to you. Look Nicole, I know I ain't the best person to talk to sometimes cause I go off on you but we're going to be married and I need you to communicate with me. Having our baby doesn't mean the end, its just putting it on hold. If you still want to go back after our baby is born, I won't be stopping you. You ain't completely happy because while we didn't want to plan with our relationship you planned with your career instead and now those plans ain't working out so that makes you unhappy. Doesn't make you a bad person or make me love you any less or mean that you love this baby any less. I'm happy because I was afraid that you didn't want this..."

I reached across the counter and traced my thumb over his cheek with a small smile before responding..

"Maybe I am completely happy and I'm just fighting it because I'm scared I will just wake up and I will be Nikki Bella, alone at the top. And all this will be gone, my life doesn't feel real to me. That's what I was telling my mom, you made all my dreams come true and I loved you before you did but now I love you more.. It feels like a dream, I just accepted along time ago that maybe I didn't deserve any of this one day and if I'm not completely happy I am able to prepare myself that way.. " I rambled out my thoughts that he had somehow helped clear with what he said.

"Well how about I fuck you when we get home, throw some pinching in there" he winked .

"My nipples are sensitive already" I rolled my eyes fighting a smile.

He chuckled before reaching for my hand and tracing his finger over my ring.

"Did you hate my proposal?"

I frowned but remembered what he had walked in on.

"No I loved it. I love you, it wasn't expected it was just perfect. It wasn't something I could have envisioned because it was like my life with you each day, unexpected. In your t-shirt staring at the sunrise, very Brocky of you.. "

He moved around the counter and moved between my legs.

"As long as you ain't doubting your life with me. I just see that look in your eyes and I am not sure you are happy with the life you have now with a fucking redneck" he searched my eyes and looking into those blue orbs made me wonder how he could think that were possible.

"I am happy I just needed to let go of it all. I'm not making sense am I?" I laughed a bit hoping he would believe me because this time I meant it.

"You are baby, your mom will be home soon. I'll get some dinner ready..."

"What an amazing son-in-law you will be" I bit my lip as my hands moved underneath the T-shirt he wore and traced over his lower back.

"Figured she made us enough dinners while she stayed with us" he shrugged as he kissed my forehead before moving away from me, but Of course I soon joined in.

"Brock?" I whispered after watching him move around for a bit next to me.

"Yeah?"

"I honestly wouldn't want this life with anyone but you. Whatever my eyes say, just know that I am completely happy with you and if there are doubts its with my career never with you"

He turned and smiled the biggest smile and I felt my heart melt.

"Well I was hoping you'd say that cause I got you some shit"

"Some shit?" I laughed as I saw him disappear without a word before going back to my chopping.

Speaking to my mom and Brock had helped clear the thoughts, maybe I didn't feel fully fulfilled because having this bundle of joy meant sacrificing my other bundle of joy but in the end my mom and well Brock made me realize that I wouldn't be happier there than this.

And with those blue orbs lighting up due to my words I knew she was right...

"Don't turn around Barbie! " I heard him and frowned.

"You shouldn't have said that because now I really want to "

"I'm almost done "

I sighed despite smiling at the amusement filling his voice.

"You can look now"

I squealed as I turned around.

"You actually bought me doughnuts! " I smiled as he moved to me after begging him so many times while we were at home.

"I bought it to soften you up. Thought you would be real mad at my ass" he chuckled and I loved how happiness filled his eyes as he had known how happy I would be.

I pulled on his tee and kissed him and his arms wrapped around me pulling me close and I smiled into the kiss. It might have been something small but just picturing how annoyed he must've been going into the store made me appreciate it more.

"You Brock Lesnar are whipped! " I whispered into his lips.

"I have been for awhile" he smirked before turning me away from him and hitting my behind.

"Lets get some real food in you first. Can't be feeding our kid doughnuts for dinner " he winked while I rolled my eyes and got back to helping him, trying to distract myself from the sweet heaven behind me..