I was alone.

Daryl was gone. He decided to go back to the Hilltop and risk his safety. I decided to stay here at the Kingdom, where I know that I will at least be safe. At least, for the time-being. It had been two days so far, though.

I wanted to leave here, to be honest, and go back to where I fept like I belonged. I wanted to go back to Alexandria. That is home to me, where all of my family and friends are, too.

Waking up this morning, I took the ultimate chance and packed all of my stuff up. I sat it to the side before turning my attention to the mirror on the dresser, seeing myself for the first time in a long time.

I was growing weaker, paler, and more useless — especially looking at myself in the face. I hate looking at my body when nude, especially when I shower and feel the water run over me — like how I wish that my sins would do. I had scars as long as my arm stretched all over my body, which can be easily hidden with the proper clothing.

I am not the same woman that I was once.

So, this is why I decided to take the women's eyeshadow that I had found in one of the dresser drawers and smeared it all over my face. The black eyeshadow was left on my fingertips and would have to be scrubbed off later. I did not want to look at myself anymore and I did not want anyone else, too, neither.

What I have done is smear the black eyeshadow all over my face and black clothing to cover my body to hide the fact that I am already dressed for my own funeral. I made sure that my hair was perfectly braided in the back and that it could not be snatched later.

I kneeled down next to my things and checked to make sure that I had everything that I needed. My gun was safe and sound, with plenty of ammo in store, while I took my machete and placed it in the sheath that was located across my back. I could easily grab it and strike in a hurry.

Then, I slowly looked over to what was beside my bag — which was a little gift that I had been received from the Kingdom as a whole. It was my first and only bow-and-arrow, plus a whole lot of arrows with it, too.

I was ready to go, but I did not feel like explaining myself on the way out. Yet, I know that I would be stopped and asked where I was going. I knew this, but I had to feel the wrath.

Once that I had my things on my back and my new bow-and-arrow in hand, I knew that it was time to go. I was going to follow in Daryl's footsteps, yet I am going home instead of heading to Hilltop. It was not long until it would get dark, so I better use the soon-to-be darkness to my advantage.

As I headed up to the front gates, everyone's eyes were on me in question and fear. Even the people that did not know me, they were still very concerned as the black make-up smeared across my face was probably throwing them off some. I could not blame them.

"Open it up. I'm leaving. For good," I said to the people that were working the front gates. They slowly began to open their doors without any question about it.

"Tess? Tess! Wait up!" I heard my name being called out from behind me and I stopped, turning around to find both Morgan and Ben running up to me. They were obviously frightened, and confusion was written all across their faces.

"What?" I blankly asked Morgan, who was taller than me. "You can't stop me, Morgan."

"Where the hell are you going?" Morgan asked, breathing weirdly after having to run to catch me before I leave. "You can't leave."

"I am," I blinked and sucked up my guilt. "I have to."

"You going to the Hilltop, too?" Ben questioned, making his way into our conversation. "Just like Daryl?"

I shook my head, looked down at my boots for a moment, before returning my gaze back up to them. "No, I'm not," I simply said and their faces said it all. They wanted to know where else that I would go at a time like this. "I'm going back home. They're gonna need me when Negan and the Saviors come back. I'm going back."

I slightly turned my back on them before Morgan placed his hand on my right shoulder and spun me back around to face him. "Why? You'll just get killed for being there and escaping from Negan."

"Why, Morgan? Why? Uh, because," I paused and raised my tone somewhat. "My life won't mean shit if they don't survive, too. Negan is bad and, yeah, he's vicious — but he doesn't stand a chance against us. I have to be there for that... When it all goes down."

"Tess, you don't have to—"

"No, I do," I quickly cut him off and our eyes met once again.

He shook his head and corrected himself, "No, Tess, what I was going to say is that... You don't have to feel guilty anymore." He had paused, but so did my breathing, too. Don't you dare, Morgan... "You have conquered your fears and demons already. Don't fall back into that same old pattern. You are going to beat them. The demons that you let consume you on a daily basis... They can no longer hurt you, Tess. You know that."

I wanted to cry, but I felt no emotion anymore because, for the most part, Morgan was right. Actually, he was wrong about one thing, though.

"You're wrong about one thing, Morgan," I chirped out and he gave me a sideways look. "I haven't conquered all my demons just yet. I haven't conquered Negan yet." I took a moment to acknowledge both his and Ben's new facial expressions. "And, you know what else? It won't be over until he's dead. Then, I can finally sleep at night."

"But, Tess, wait—"

"I have to be there for when it all goes down," I interrupted him once again and he acknowledged my serious glare. "I owe that to Abraham and Glenn. I owe that to Denise. I owe that to Spencer and Olivia. I owe that to Maggie and her own unborn child. I owe that, Morgan... To myself. I have to be there."

With that said, he finally nodded, but did not look like he wanted to let me to go. This may be the last time that we see each other and this is why it was so hard to go. Morgan knew that, so this is why — when I went to leave — I turned back and hugged him as tight as I could manage. We embraced and the hug was sincere and meaningful.

This time, Morgan gave me a reassuring nod and smile before I went over to Ben and hug the kid for dear life, too. We had become close over the past few days. He was just a kid, who was so wise for his age. Yet, his good heart would cost him in the end.

"I'm going to miss you, Tess," Ben whispered in my ear as he hung his arms tightly around my neck.

I pressed him back and, with my eyes closed, I whispered back, "I'll miss you, too, kid."

Finally, we released and everything felt right in the world for once. I do not know why, but I felt that we were all at peace with one another. Somehow, this reassured me that everything was going to be okay.

As I waved goodbye to them and they did the same with me, I called out to Morgan, "Mind telling the King that I have decided to go home? Thank him, too, for me, would yah?"

Morgan nodded and agreed, "Of course. Safe travels, Tess."

I nodded back and returned, "Thank you, Morgan. Safe travels for you, too."

Finally, I turned my back on them just as the gates closed behind me and I felt like it was actually going to be okay... In the end. Plus, I cannot wait until I get home.

—

WITHOUT running into any trouble, surprising enough, I returned home in the fashion that I left the Kingdom in. I was alright.

Taking watch tonight was Tobin, who pulled out his rifle as soon as he spotted my dark silhouette approach the gate. "Who goes there?"

"Not dead," I simply said and raised my right arm high in the air. The light from behind him shined onto me. "Hey, it's me."

"Tess?" Tobin breathed out and slowly began to lower his rifle. "What the... What the hell are you doing back here?"

"I've come back home. Isn't it obvious?" I laughed, trying to joke around with him. "So, you gonna let me in or let me stand out here in the cold?"

Before he could say anything, the gate suddenly opened, but without him being down there to do it. He was not alone, apparently.

The gate opened and there stood Rick. Not just Rick, though, but everyone else, too. Standing behind Rick was Tara, Rosita, Carl, Michonne, Gabriel, and Carl, too. Then... I saw Daryl in the very back.

He was here! He was home! Everything was okay, after all! I knew it!

"Tess," Rick breathed out in disbelief and happiness, too.

Immediately, I ran and collided into his arms as we hugged it out. "I'm home," I squeaked out and almost had a tear slip out in happiness.

After our embrace, I went over to Daryl and hugged him, too, and mostly out of habit. "I had to come back and I'm glad that I did now," I said to him and I am not sure if anyone else heard.

"We're glad that you're here, too," he whispered in my hair before letting me go. "We have something to show you."

I do not know why, but my heart fell into the pit of my stomach. Let me guess... Nothing was alright, was it? I had fooled myself, apparently.

Then, this is when Rick led the way. Everything is okay, I kept repeating in my head as Rick led us to one of the houses that we never use. It did not have any furniture in it, even though it was very nice from the outside and emptied inside, too.

We got further in when I realized that this was the house that Morgan had built that jailhouse-cage in. We stepped inside and Rick waited on me, but everybody hung back for a moment. The light from the little window outside from the moon seemed to just shine in this room.

I stepped towards the cage and was concerned, looking back at Rick for answers, but he kept quiet until I seen an actual figure in there. I wanted it to be Negan so bad. Maybe they had captured him and he was finally defeated. They would wait until I got here to kill him, but not without Maggie, though, neither, or Sasha.

Then, my mouth dropped and my stomach twisted in turns that made the butterflies finally wake up and flutter away. "Dwight?"

"...Tess?" Dwight came into the light while barricaded behind the locked cage. I could not believe it. He was here, but why, though? "Thank God that you're okay."

"Yeah," I breathed out, still in complete and utter disbelief. "Um... W-What the fuck are you doing here?"

Before he could answer, Rick approached me and stood off to my left side. "Rosita and Sasha went to the Sanctuary, but... Sasha went in by herself. Without Rosita."

Prior to reacting, I was already in Rosita's face and about to kick her ass. "I swear to God, if you left her there to die just because—"

"I didn't," Rosita cut me off before I could do anything that I would later regret. "She locked the fence behind her and told me that it... It wasn't my time."

Slowly, I regrouped with Rick, standing back in front of Dwight. "No... No, she's...," I tried to talk myself out of the inevitable. "They'll... They'll kill her. That's it. We're done."

"That's the thing, Tess," Rick continued, shaking his head. "Dwight caught up with Rosita as she was leaving and... He wants to help. He wants to join us."

"Are you... Are you serious right now?" This is when I turned to Dwight for him to explain further. "Explain. You really want to?"

He nodded and agreed, "I do."

I could not believe it. Really and truly, I could not. I was so happy, though, since he is the one Savior that I actually did not want to die by the end of this war.

To be honest... I have actually really missed him.

With that said, I smiled back at him and extended my hand, placing it over his that was wrapped around one of the bars. "I'll go fetch you a pillow. But... Thank you, D."

I was about to leave when he pulled me back and kept his hand wrapped over mine. "No. Thank you, Tess."