Running...

I miss Glenn.

Sweating...

I miss Abraham.

Panting...

I miss my brother.

Escaping...

I miss my home.

— ♕ —

"This way," Brie ordered, holding the heavy door to the stairwell opened while keeping a look-out while I threw my backpack on my back. "Hurry up."

"I'm coming," I hissed back as I ran past her, halfway down the stairs before she finally closed the door behind us. Then, she began to shuffle down the stairs behind me, too.

She had figured out that I was lying about what Sherry had said to me — I don't know how, though. She wanted to leave, too, and I'm not sure if this is a trick or not — but, I have done warned her that if it is... I would kill her, no questions asked.

"If you put myself and, above all, my home in danger," I had said to her after she agreed to leave with me and Daryl, "I will kill you, Brie, no questions asked. Don't make me, though."

She had her own small backpack on her back with some of her things inside while mine held about the same stuff, too. We had only stuffed in our bags things such as our toothbrushes, toothpaste, few clothes folded, bandages, weapons, and ammo, etc. Just some basic survival gear, just in case.

I couldn't legitimately wait until I was on the outside with Daryl and to hold onto him for as long as I wanted — without some dumbass over my shoulder, telling me not to. I hate Negan, man. I absolutely hate and despise that son-of-a-bitch.

The side-door entrance was in the clear view, but before we could get there, I stopped real quick to grab my gun out. Brie almost didn't stop, clearly out of breath and wanting to get out as soon as we could, too.

"Hold on," I whispered, pulling out my PPK Stainless Steel with a silencer on it. It's small, but it's steady and it's a good weight for me. It's a .22 and it holds up to eleven rounds, which is pretty good for me.

"Hey," I heard somebody suddenly call out, and the voice didn't belong to Brie, either.

It was a man and I looked up just in time for him to holt right in front of the door. I recognized him, too, from the night that both Abraham and Glenn died. He was one of the ones, among the rest, that stood close by while my two friends died.

He was clearly confused as to what we were doing, with his mouth in an O. Then, he slowly trailed his eyes to our backpacks, nervous and hurried facial features, and the gun in my hand. He soon put two-and-two together.

"W-What are you two doing?" he nervously asked, just as I had sunken down to my old-self. I began to practically run up to him, placing a pep in my step. "I-I'll tell Negan! Don't you leave! I'll tell him when he comes ba—"

"No, you won't," I simply said, just as I had placed the front of the silencer underneath his chin and squeezed the trigger.

The bullet flew through the whole gun and silencer, too, and through the bottom of his head clean through the top. Almost like it was all in slow-motion, his now deceased body hit the ground knees-first and, then, the front of his body hit the concrete underneath him. A blood puddle began to form from his head, where I shot him at.

Brie had her back pressed to the cold concrete wall, watching in horror as I had just killed an unarmed man, who just happened to pass by while we were getting ready to leave. Underneath my black boots, the blood had wandered over there as I would leave stains behind now.

"W-What did you—?"

"Let's go," I simply barked out, having my eyes still down on the man that I just killed. I have killed before and would do it again, too, in a heartbreak to protect my own.

Brie went before me and used the strength of her back to open the door open, as I now seen the spotlight of the light from the outside now on my feet and the blood. I stared down the dead man one last time before I turned my back on him — and the place, in general — before exiting out of the door.

I nearly stumped back when I spotted someone, unfamiliar to me from the backside, bludgeons Fat Joey to death with a pipe. Blood was spraying everywhere from the busted-up face of Joey as I held my breath until the man spun around, ready to use the pipe on myself and Brie, too.

I placed my hand over my chest before noticing that it was just Daryl. This was it, I thought, feeling the tears in my eyes. I could finally hold onto him for as long as I want to. So, I did.

I jumped into his bloody arms without caring and wrapped my arms around his ribs. To my surprise, he held onto me as well, but our embrace only lasted for a minute before he asked me what she — as in Brie — was doing with me. "She's going with us," I reassured him, slowly nodding. "She's okay. And, if this ends up being some sick joke, I'll kill her."

Then, once again, Daryl spun around and continued to bash in Joey's head, just for good measure. I watched as Daryl continued to drive that pipe in his head over and over again.

However, in the midst of all this, something in the back of my head told me to look up. And, so, I did — but very slowly. And, when I did, I nearly fell to my knees in disbelief.

"Tess?" Jesus breathed out, almost crying, himself. "Oh, my God."

"Paul," I cried and, before I knew it, I found myself running over to him. I immediately wrapped my arms around my twin brother and cried on his shoulder, while feeling his warm embrace back. "You're here. Oh, thank God that you're here."

"I would never let them keep you," he whispered back in my ear, trying to keep himself from crying on my shoulder, too. "I'll always be there to help you."

Then, Jesus noticed the bloody scene behind us as he looked to Daryl, who was being anything but merciful. "Daryl," came Jesus' warning tone, carefully watching him. He couldn't believe the scene while Daryl stopped for a moment and was breathing heavily. "Daryl."

He seemed to have had enough as he threw the pipe to the side. Squinting his eyes down to something that Joey had somewhat underneath him, he bent down and quickly grabbed it. I immediately recognized it to be Rick's very own Colt Python. Joey had it this whole time, apparently.

"It ain't just about gettin' by here," Daryl suddenly said down to Joey's deceased and bloody body. He placed the gun on his side before looking up to me and Jesus. "It's about gettin' it all."

In one swift motion, Daryl had hopped on a motorcycle, began to back it up with his feet, and almost hit Brie in the process. Jesus picked up the walkie-talkie that Joey was carrying, too, while I was still standing there in total and utter disbelief.

Daryl looked over to me and grunted: "I got the key. Let's go."

"How are we all gonna fit on one bike?" Brie found herself to finally ask the ideal question here.

"I have a key, too," I replied, hopping on the one next to Daryl's. "Brie and I will go on this one while Paul and Daryl go on the other."

Without further or due, there was no time to discuss it. Brie, without question, hopped on the back of ours while Jesus was on the back of Daryl's. I knew the way from here to home, so I wasn't about to waste any time in doing so.

"Brie and I know the way out of here," I called out to both Daryl and Jesus over my engine roared to life. It was loud, so I had to yell. "Follow us."

Daryl somewhat nodded before calling back: "Lead the way."

Eventually, I had to begin to follow them. I hadn't driven a motorcycle in so long. I didn't know where we were going now, though, but didn't question it as anywhere but Negan's place would be great.

Then, just as I noticed the old dirt road, I knew exactly where we were going now and the place wasn't so far in the distance, either. There it was. The Hilltop, the one place on this Earth that won't allow me to be at. Yet, I'm hoping that they will just for a minute.

We rode up to the closed gates as Jesus called for them to let us in, seeing Cal being one of the ones on look-out still. I still hate that ass-cheek for what he did to me, but I'll let it go since I did survive it. I'm not sure how Daryl's forgiveness has changed any, though.

They opened the gates and we road the bikes in until we were good enough inside. They closed the gates behind us as several people, everyone that I had once knew, began to surrounded us. I had placed a beanie on my head to keep the cold away and it had worked, as I straightened it up.

"Tess?" I heard somebody almost cry out as I spun around to see Maggie not far away from me.

She was alive, after all. She looked better than she did that night, but she was still crying. I was scared to death, seeing as she may know about myself being all in love with her husband and all.

However, before I could even react, she had drove a line through the crowd and ambushed me with a strong embrace. We held each other for a good minute or so. Maggie was crying on my shoulder as, for once, I couldn't find the tears to shred. Honestly, I was just so happy that she was okay.

"How's the baby?" I whispered in her ear, seeing as that night had to relate to some baby problems.

She tightened her grip around my neck and replied: "It's good. We're okay. It's okay." Then, that's when she began to pull apart from me as we faced one another. She was now smiling through her red eyes and tears. "Glenn's here."

When she said that, I nearly passed out due to the shock. Yet, I somewhat knew what she meant. "They're both here," she continued, looking over me at Daryl, too. "Abraham and Glenn. We buried them over here."

"C-Can I see them? Please?" I didn't want to sound like I was begging, but let's be honest, I was. I needed to see them both before it was too late. I wish that I had been here for when they buried them in the ground together.

"Of course," Maggie slowly nodded her head through the tears. She placed her hand on my back and began to lead the way for me and Daryl, who had followed up behind us. Brie has stayed back, unaware of what to do or say.

Before we even left where we were, somebody had walked out of one of the trailers, with another familiar-looking girl behind her, and that's when I immediately recognized her face. "Sasha?!"

She looked up, sort of caught off-guard by the sudden outburst of her name being called, then took a moment to look at me. Her mouth dropped as she could no longer keep it together. "Tess?! Oh, my God! You're okay!"

I held my arms open as she ran into them, crushing her body to mine as we just held each other for a good minute there. Enid wasn't far behind her, who I smiled at while holding onto Sasha.

Slowly, but surly, the tears were coming together. It wasn't just because of Sasha, but because of Maggie, too. It was because of Glenn and Abraham being buried right over there. It was because we had finally escaped Negan's Sanctuary and because I had reunited with my brother, too. It was everything.

"I'm taking her and Daryl to go see them," Maggie had said over my shoulder to Sasha, who now noticed Daryl. She slowly nodded before embracing him behind me.

My family was back together again... But we were still missing a few people, though. Two of them were still dead, though, unfortunately.

Then, altogether, we began to narrow down over to where the graves were at. I held my breath, then gulped, and found myself suddenly stopping. The train of people behind me had to stop, too, as Maggie held her left hand onto my shoulder for dear life.

"It's okay," I heard her say in my ear, just as I slowly looked back at her. She was still smiling. "It's okay, I promise."

Then, once again, we picked the train back up as we slowly ached right to the graves. You could tell that they were in there with the crosses over each one, marking them as one being Glenn's and the other being Abraham's. The dirt was high on both somewhat tall graves.

My legs felt like jelly, like how they were before when Glenn was unjustly taken away from us and when I was taken to where he was killed at, too. I found myself falling to the ground underneath me after Maggie couldn't save me from falling down. I sat there in the orange clay between the two graves, digging into the dirt in front of me.

My mouth hung open, but no words could come out. I didn't realize that I was crying until a single tear had fallen down my cheek from just my left eye, alone. It felt like a bullet had flew through my hand when it hit it down below. Daryl had taken a knee from beside me, not doing much of anything at the moment.

I sunk down, driving my elbows into the dirt, and placing my head into the palm of my hands. I knew that I was crying now, letting the tears tear through my fingertips. They were very hot and felt like they were a pound each.

Then, when I noticed the green balloon hanging above one of the two graves, I knew which one belonged to who. So, then, my head fell into the ground until I saved it with my folded arms underneath my arms now. "Why? Oh, God... Why? Why did it have to be them? Abe... Glenn... Why?!"

That's when I felt a heavy hand land on my right shoulder and, without looking, I knew who it belonged to. Daryl rubbed it with his thumb before he stood up, and — somehow, I knew that he was upset, before he took off through Maggie, Sasha, and Enid, leaving us alone.

I was still crying so bad before I heard some footsteps disappear. I finally helped myself up to see that Sasha and Enid had left, too. Maggie was still there with me, though.

Sniffling, I looked up to her — while I still sat on the my knees on the ground — and asked through a veil of tears: "Maggie, c-could you leave me alone with them real quick? Please?"

She gulped and nodded. "Sure, honey. Take all the time that you need."

With that said, she turned around on her heel and walked away, leaving me alone with the dead. I knew what I had to say to them both, especially Glenn, so I was just going to go ahead and just say it.

"This is it, guys," I huffed, still allowing the tears to fall. "This is the very last time that I cry over you two. I'm not doing it anymore after this. I'm finally going to let the past go, I promise."

Of course, it was going to be dead silent here since I was all by myself with the ghosts. "Abraham, I miss your jokes. I miss your laugh. I miss you. You made everyone happy and, above all, you made Sasha so happy, too. You deserved better."

Taking a deep breath, I looked down at Glenn's grave and thought about crying again. So, finally, I used the back of my dirty hands to wipe the tears away. I shook as I had to, finally not crying anymore. I felt almost brand-new. Almost. This time, I was going to finally suck it up and ask for forgiveness.

"Glenn," I began, slowly standing up to my own two feet and gulped to keep the tears away. "I miss you. A lot. So does everybody else, but I feel like that I do the most — which is really unfair to Maggie. I should've told you how I felt while you were still alive. I felt so guilty when I walked in and seen Maggie, how happy she actually was when she seen that I was alive. She should know the truth, after all, that I was — without a doubt — in love with her husband, you. I hope that you can find it in your own heart to forgive me, because..."

I sucked in another breath before I let it out once again while having my eyes closed, too. It is now or never, Tess, the little voice in my head said to do. Out with it already.

"I finally forgive myself," I found myself blurting out, after taking a deep breath. "I can finally say that I can forgive myself for not saving you and Abraham. I won't feel complete until he's dead. Until then, I'm not going to cry anymore. I'm a big girl... And, big girls don't cry."

Slipping something out of my back pocket, it was a necklace that I had found back at the Sanctuary before leaving. It was just a simple silver necklace with a cross on it. So, I looped it over his own cross and stood back, to take another deep breath.

I felt good for once. This is the first that I have felt somewhat complete in weeks. For once, everything was going to be okay.

"You were in love with him?" I suddenly heard somebody whisper behind me, almost not hearing them at all.

I spun around and, to my surprise, saw Maggie standing there with a look of complete disbelief on her face. My mouth dropped, yet I still didn't know what to say.

"M-Maggie, I—"

"You were in love with him?" she repeated herself, taking a step back when I pounced at her. "Just tell me. Were you?"

She was somewhat calm about this, which made me believe that she didn't want the others to hear our little argument. I tried to reach out to her, but she wasn't having any of it as she hopped backwards again.

"Maggie, please," I tried to beg of her, on the verge of tears again. "Please don't do this to me."

"Do this to you?!" She nearly screamed, but piped-down once again to keep this between just us two. "What have I done to you? Did I hog my husband or something? Is that it?"

"No, Maggie. No, it's not—"

"You loved him," she almost cried out, her eyes red once again. "And you couldn't tell me, and you never were if I hadn't came back to check on you."

She had turned around and I went to grab her arm to stop her from leaving. I had gotten a good grip on her before she had flew back around and, before I knew it, she had slapped me across the face as hard as she possibly could. It stung, like a bee had done it, as I believed that her handprint would be what's left afterwards.

I threw my hand over where she had slapped me and looked up at her in total disbelief. She couldn't believe that she had done it, either, but — as soon as my arms had met hers — she didn't care anymore. "I don't want you here anymore," she simply said, in a demanding tone.

Before I could utter another word, she had already started to stomp away before she was gone altogether. And, nothing was okay again.

Daryl, Brie, and myself were allowed to stay at the Hilltop over night. I had to put an ice-pack and cold rag to my face after Maggie had fucked it up yesterday. I couldn't blame her. I was actually in favor of her over myself, to be honest.

Paul had gotten to know Brie, immediately trusting her within a few minutes of meeting her. Early this morning, she had told us that she was going to head to the Kingdom, where she knew that she would be welcomed at with open arms. As we both knew, the Saviors can never step foot into there, so she took her bags and left.

I had just gotten dressed when I heard the front gates squeak up. I was with Daryl and Jesus when we came around one of the barns, seeing a whole group of people standing there with Maggie. I almost ran away, immediately thinking that it was the Saviors and Negan there to kill us.

Then, I seen something else than darkness... I seen the light. Standing there was Rick, Michonne, Carl, Rosita, and Tara, completely unaware that Daryl and myself was even here. They were all alive, especially Tara!

Without meaning to, I began to cry when Tara glanced over at me, turned away, and again when she recognized that it was really me. "Tess!" she screamed, nearly knocking down Rick when we began to run for each other.

We crashed into each other's arms, crying as hard as we both could. From the corner of my eye, I seen that Daryl and Rick were in the process of hugging it out, actually crying on one another's shoulders. I couldn't believe all of this as I breathed in Tara's recognizable scent, squeezing her as tight as I could.

To be honest, I could've sworn that I seen Maggie smiling about all of this, too, but I knew that it was too early to tell. She wasn't going to forgive me so easily.

Finally, I opened my eyes — while stills hugging Tara — and noticed Carl standing there, holding out his arms for me. I immediately ambushed him, leaving Tara's arms for his, squeezing him as tight as I could.

"I'm so glad that you're okay, kiddo," I said above his head since I was still taller than him. "I knew that you would be."

"All thanks to you," Carl credited as we released one another, tipping his hat off to me.

Then, I made my rounds when I hugged Michonne as well, not wanting to leave anyone out of this hug-fest. Rosita, however, didn't care to be held, but I still hugged her, nevertheless, and she actually held me back, too.

We all hugged one another, as Tara made an effort to embrace Daryl, and that's when I turned around to face Rick. He was silent, yet his bloodshot eyes told another story.

He looked at me and lowered his head, not believing the sight in front of him. I knew that he now knew that I was right all along about when going up against the Negan and the Saviors.

However, he couldn't find the correct words to say it, but I didn't care. I only took two steps forward and wrapped my arms around his upper body, nestling my head underneath his beard. He wrapped his arms over me, too, as we just held onto one another for dear life.

I rested my head there, squeezing my eyes at one point, until I heard Rick whisper to me: "You were right, Tess. You were right. I should've listened to you. I'm so sorry."

"It's alright, Rick," I reassured him, getting as much as this embrace that I could. "We'll get them and, this time, we'll get them good. I can promise you that."

"We promised Glenn and Abe that, too," he whispered back before we slowly separated. We both turned around to face Daryl, who slowly revealed the Colt Python to Rick — his gun. Rick was in awe as he seemed to not recognize it like he did before, but he accepted it, anyways, thanks to Daryl.

Rick, then, faced us — the rest of his trusted and close group, with fresh tears in his eyes and his face as red as a tomato. Nevertheless, we all found it in ourselves to look back at Rick with all smiles and gratitude. I had never felt so belonged in a group before, not even here at the Hilltop all those years. Yet, when I'm with people like Rick and Daryl — and even Tara and Carl, too — I feel more at home and myself like the world can't stop us now.

I reunited with Tara as we stood there next to one another, still with the emotion of bubbly tears, we all knew what was next. Even Jesus did, who never agreed to attacking the Saviors at all. He believed that everyone should live, even the evil in life. Yet, I was hopeful that he wouldn't see it that way anymore — as I sure didn't.

Without saying a word, Rick turned around on his heels and began to stride towards the mansion of the Hilltop. He knew that we would all follow in suit...

And we did, as a unified team and family.

• Y'all... This fucking chapter took the LIFE out of me, no joke. Like, y'all... I'm honestly NOT OKAY right now, tbh w/ y'all. This shit hurt WORSE than it should've, tbh. I mean... I was WAILING from the first sentence to the last. And, can we please REAL QUICK agree that Tess is a complete BAD-ASS now more than ever before?! I mean, the way that she took out that guy like it was no problem at all... She's the best, hands down. Negan would be impressed, wouldn't y'all say?! 😂 I especially cried when Tess reunited the team, especially with Tara. Their friendship is gonna be cute af 😭 #TnT is their "ship name" cuz there's not MUCH you can do with Tess/Tara as a ship name, so I like that up there 🙃 Nevertheless... The shit is gonna hit the fan soon enough. With who, you may ask? With Negan and the Saviors? With the Kingdom? With the Hilltop? With... Maggie? 🤔 You'll all know this and more... All the love .xx 💋 •