Chapter Four: Just Trying to Survive


~Dawn's POV~

We had been making our way back towards the castle for a while before I glanced at the still smiling Uni and decided to ask some questions.

"So, Arty right?" I asked. Uni glared at me.

"Look, I panicked when I first met her. It was the best I could come up with on the spot."

I chuckled. "When did you first meet her? I must say, I'm surprised I didn't know about her."

"You don't know everything about me." Uni replied mysteriously. "Besides, is it so hard to believe that I have a personal life outside of you?"

"Considering that it is my job to always know where you are and what you're doing, as well as to be by your side at every hour of every day, yes, it is difficult to believe." I stated. "Not to mention that you don't exactly have the best track record of being able to talk to people you like."

"Wha---!? Ok, first of all, I don't like her. Second, what do you mean I can't talk to people?! I'm a great conversationalist!"

"Oh, so was all the red on your face simply allergies?" I asked. Uni pushed his glasses up.

"No, I've just been in the sun too long, that's all." He lied.

"Alright, fine, but what about all your stuttering around her? Was that also an effect of the sun?"

Uni shrugged. "This coming from the man I've known for all twenty years of my life who, in all that time, has rarely spoken a sentence that's more than ten words? In fact, this is the most I've heard you say all week. "

It was my turn to shrug. "Touché."

We continued walking in silence, not really paying attention to where we were going. I followed Uni through backroads and alleys, leaving behind the main part of town as the market noises grew quieter. I found the near silence refreshing and focused on our footsteps against the cobblestone roads. I could just make out the sound of someone playing a stringed instrument in the distance and I smiled as it reminded me of a song Jon liked to play on his lute. Uni sighed, bringing my attention to him and continued talking.

"To answer your earlier question, I met her about two months ago. I forget where you were, I think you may have been sick or something, perhaps it was a training day." Uni waved the matter aside. "Anyway, I was bored and the guard my father had assigned to watch me was a newbie, totally unsure of what to do. I easily got past him and decided to go explore town a bit. I wandered around for a good half hour before finding Lucy's shop. She didn't recognize me as the prince, so I gave her a fake name and we struck up a conversation."

I noticed Uni smiling fondly as he spoke, lost in the memory. I cleared my throat to get his attention. The prince would often get caught up in his dream worlds, distracting himself from the reality going on around him.

"What happened next?" I prompted.

"Oh, when I got back to the castle, the knight was in a complete state of panic! He hadn't told anyone I was missing out of fear of getting demoted. The look on his face when I walked into my room, fit as a fiddle, was hilarious!" Uni laughed. "He looked like he couldn't decide whether to be angry or relieved, so it came out as this really confused and stressed look. I told him that I had just went for a walk around the castle grounds, but I think he could tell I was lying. We ended up making a deal; I wouldn't tell anyone that he had failed his duties, and he wouldn't tell my father that I had gone off doing who knows what for half the day."

I nodded, though something still bothered me. Thankfully, I didn't have to ask my question because Uni continued talking. That was a good thing about him. If you want to know something, all you have to do is stay silent for long enough and he's bound to tell you at some point. He was great at carrying our conversations.

"Since then I've visited Lucy maybe six, seven times, whenever I could really." He stopped walking and turned towards me. I hadn't noticed until now, but in the time that we had been walking the street had become completely empty. I shivered as I realized we had ended up near the outskirts of the village, right next to the tall defence wall that surrounded the kingdom. The music had grown louder, creating a peaceful atmosphere in the late afternoon sun, but I knew that this part of town had quite a different side than the one that prompted the false sense of security it was currently portraying, a side we would see if we stayed around until nightfall. It was the sort of place where hoodlums and troublemakers hung about, and I was starting to regret coming this way. Uni, on the other hand, seemed unaware of our sketchy surroundings and continued chatting carelessly.

"The only reason I didn't tell you is because I didn't want you to have to keep the secret." He rubbed the back of his neck nervously. "Since, you know, it's kind of your job to make sure I don't do things like this.... I only brought you with today because I hadn't seen Lucy in so long and it was too good of an opportunity to pass up, what with lessons being canceled and me running out of ink." He sighed and looked down, but I didn't immediately realize that he was waiting for some sort of affirmation that I would keep his secret. I was too busy scanning the nearby buildings, searching for a set of unfriendly eyes peering out a window or a threatening figure lurking in the shadows.

I couldn't shake off the sudden feeling that we were being watched. I have often been accused of being overly paranoid, but I honestly couldn't help it. It was my job to make sure nothing bad happened to the prince, the future of Nera, which was quite a heavy responsibility for someone of only twenty one years of age. It had caused me to grow tense and cautious, so I really couldn't be blamed if I came off as on edge.

I looked at Uni who was staring at me expectantly and I realized I had been only half listening to him. I felt a small pang of guilt, which I quickly shoved away and continued walking, suddenly wanting to just get back to the castle as soon as possible.

"It-it's completely fine, Uni. I'm not mad at you and I understand your reasons behind keeping this from me." We walked around a corner, now walking right next to the stone wall. I sighed, knowing I would probably regret my next sentence later. "I promise I won't tell anyone, as long as you promise that you'll bring me with you from now on when you want to go somewhere like this. If I'm with you I can at least have a better chance of keeping you out of trouble."

Uni smiled and opened his mouth to respond, only to be cut off by an unfamiliar voice.

'Aww, that's so sweet! Enough to make a brutha cry."

We both spun around, me jumping in front of Uni and instinctively reaching towards the dagger I had hidden in my cloak. The voice had come from a boy, sitting casually against the stone wall, plucking on a lute like instrument. He reached up and wiped a fake tear from his eye before continuing to brush his fingers against the strings, as if we weren't even there.

"Who are you?" I asked, keeping my voice calm. The boy responded with a laugh.

"Heh, that's what we're all tryna figure out, ain't it brutha?" And then, to both my and Uni's surprise, he started to sing.

"Who are you?

Oh who am I?

Perhaps I knew,

In a day gone by.

Maybe one day, I'll discover what it means to feel alive,

But until then, I'm just trying to survive."

Uni and I exchanged a glance and I could tell that we were both thinking that this man was crazy. While he strummed his lute I took a moment to examine his appearance. He wore a simple white shirt with a black sash across his chest and a pair of brown travelers pants that were cut off just below the knee and looked as if someone had done so with a knife. In addition to this, he had a brown trenchcoat with the sleeves rolled up, revealing bandage like wraps covering his forearms. He had a large knife strapped to his arm, brown fingerless leather gloves, and simple black shoes. There was a piece of cloth spread out in front of him which held a few coins. As he nodded his head to his song, I caught a glimpse of a gold hoop in his ear. Perhaps the strangest thing about him was the maniacal smile lighting up his light grey eyes, reinforcing my suspicions about his lack of sanity. He finished his song and smiled at us, and I noticed a yellow mask lying on top of his short, curly, dirty blonde hair.

"If ya wanna hear another song, you're gonna have to pay." He said while smirking. I stared at him blankly for a moment before shaking my head. For some reason, I was having trouble communicating my thoughts. Something about this man's whole presence just threw me off.

"No, actually we-"

"Ah, not fans of music? Shame, it seems like no one's into anything good these days, it's all about fighting and working." He said, cutting me off. "No one's got time for the sweeter things in life."

"No, we like music.." Uni said, slightly confused. Suddenly the man jumped up and started shouting angrily at us.

"Ah, so you're too good for it, huh? My music not worthy of your coins? Well, I don't want your filthy money anyway, you cream dips!"

Uni took a step back, caught off guard by the man's erratic behavior. "Wha-? No, that's not it at all! We jus-"

"Look, we don't want any trouble." I said, holding my dagger out in front of me, eyeing the knife strapped to the man's arm. "We are just passing through." Instead of looking scared or angry or pulling out his own weapon, the smiling man just laughed and sat back down against the wall.

"Heh, trouble, trouble. Funny thing about trouble, no one wants, but it still finds some unfortunate freak and latches on to them." He murmured. He looked up at us. "Guess that's what happened to me, huh?" Without waiting for an answer, he looked back down and went back to playing his lute.

I slowly lowered my dagger and glanced at Uni. He shrugged at me, seemingly as confused about our situation as I was.

"Just get out of here. Leave poor old Tom all alone, no one cares about him." The man said sadly.

"So... uh, Tom, is that your name?" Uni asked, hesitantly stepping closer. The man stopped playing and looked up at Uni as if he had grown a second head.

"Cripes, how'd you know!?" He jumped up excitedly and held out his hand. "You can call me Tommy." Uni glanced at the man uncertainly before slowly taking his hand. I stood close by, ready to attack the second Tommy made any move.

"H-hello Thomas, it's nice to meet you." Uni said. "You play the lute very well." Tommy dropped Uni's hand.

"Woah brutha, first things first, this is no lute, this is a cittern." He tapped his cittern and played a chord. "Second, the name's Tommy. The last person who called me Thomas was my ex wife, and let's just say that's the last time she called me anything." He winked at me and laughed before turning back to Uni. He looked Uni up and down and glanced at me.

"Judging from your fancy clothes and stylish hair, I'm guessing you're a royal, the prince, right?"

Uni looked at Tommy in shock and I groaned inwardly. I told him adding a cloak would not be a sufficient disguise, but does he listen to me, nooo.

"Yeah, I don't really do that whole 'bowing' crap, bad knees and all." Tommy said "That and I got this whole thing against the government." Tommy looked at me and saw the concern in my face. He held up his hands in a soothing gesture. "Not that you need to worry bud, I don't got nothing against your friend here personally, just the system in general.

The strange man sat back down against the wall and once again picked up his instrument. Uni and I just watched as the man fiddled with the strings, too shocked to find words. Tommy glanced at the sky before yawning, as if bored by the sun.

"You two should hurry if you want to get back to your castle before dark. This place isn't the nicest towards strangers at night, or to anyone really. You're lucky you ran into me and not one of the nastier Wanderers."

"Wanderers?" I asked, unfamiliar with the term as used in this context.

"Wanderers." Tommy repeated. "People like me, guys and gals without assignments or 'purposes' I guess, whatever you wanna call those things given by the Seer person. Some of us never got em, and others got ones that didn't fit, so we left em and started wandering, trying to find a place that does fit."

"You mean, you don't have an assignment?" I asked, surprise clear in my voice.

"Nope." He strummed his cittern. "I broke free from the political restraints, brutha."

"I didn't realize that was possible." Uni muttered behind me.

"But, how do you live?" I asked, completely perplexed by the situation.

"I already told ya, I don't. I'm just surviving."

"But aren't those the same thing?" I asked, furrowing my brow.

"Maybe to a small creaniumed cream weasel like yourself, but me? I know better."

I blinked, unsure whether to feel insulted or not. Tommy now had his eyes closed and was somehow playing his cittern in a way that carried its melody through the air around us. "So, what about you?" He said suddenly, keeping his eyes closed.

"Pardon?"

"What about you. Do you live or survive?" He opened one eye and stared at me.

"I'm still unsure of how those two terms are different." I said. Tommy sighed, seeming disappointed in me. "Could you try explaining the question in more detail?"

Tommy shook his head. "That kind of wisdom doesn't come free, brutha." Tommy closed his eyes again. I felt someone tap my shoulder and turned around to see Uni.

"As interesting as this is, we should really get going." He said.

"He's right." Tommy said. I looked back at him. He had pulled his mask down so it was now covering his face. It was yellow and had a big grin and shifty eyes, just as insane looking as his real ones.

Before we walked away I dug into my pocket and pulled out a couple of knots. I walked over to the man and quietly placed them on the brown cloth in front of him. I still had more questions for the odd man, but instead of asking them I turned to walk away.

"Hey, thanks man!" Tommy called after me. I didn't know how he had seen me through his mask, but I concluded that it must have holes for his eyes, even though I couldn't see any. I smiled at him.

"My name is Dawn." I said. He nodded. As Uni and I walked away, he started to sing again, his voice following us around bends and through the echoey streets, long after we had lost sight of him. His words were clear, and the melody was eerily pleasant.


"Wandering souls, flood the streets, as darkness fills the sky,

A million questions in my head, but I can never find out why.

Was this the way I was made, or do I suck at drawing straws,

Who rolled the die,

Who read the cards,

Who created all these laws?

And who are they to get to choose, what kind of person I can be

What makes them so special, so much 'mightier than thee',

Cause at the end of the day, we're all just worms on natures skin,

And if being free is a crime, than brutha, you know I love to sin.

It's not my fault if I don't fit into your perfectly made shell,

So take your expectations and your regulations, and leave me in this hell,

Cause I may not be what you wanted, but who knows what I can be,

I got no idea about my future, but I'm happy currently!

Even though I don't got no place where people say I belong,

Who needs a so called home when you've got music and a song,

And as people walk by they're laughing at the mask I wear,

But as the fools walk by I laugh at how much they seem to care

Who I am...

Oh, who I am.

But, who are you?

Oh who am I?

Perhaps I knew,

In a day gone by.

Maybe one day, I'll discover what it means to feel alive,

But until then, I'm just trying to survive.

Until then, I'm just trying to survive."


I chuckled as the music faded away. What a strange man, I thought.

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