Fantasmer (verb) to fantasize

Despite Shreesa's inn marking the halfway point between my chateau and Marius's, the second leg of our journey was slow. The colder it got, the more we needed to stop and allow the humans in our company time to warm themselves, and the more blood my vampires required.

This far north, the sun's rays were dulled by heavy clouds, but traveling during the day depleted us. For a week, we'd made camp at dusk. And each night, after my nightly meeting with my council, I returned to my tent to greedily feed from Claire as she laid upon a mountain of furs.

Truthfully, I didn't need to eat every day, but I couldn't stop myself. Not when she was right there, so warm and soft, and feeding had become my excuse just to be close to her.

If I was feeding, I could throw her trembling legs over my shoulder. I could kiss her thigh. I could twist our fingers together. I could wipe clean the wound and ensure she ate. I could keep her company and learn more about her before she drifted off to sleep.

But touching her and holding her and stealing laughs with her late into the night wasn't the only thing I wanted.

I needed her. All of her. Needed to be inside her. Claiming her. Pleasuring her. Fucking her. Coaxing more than little whimpers from her lips. Giving myself to her over and over. I needed to hear her scream my name. Needed to feel those soft thighs around my waist as I came deep inside her.

But those were only the things I imagined. It was harder to ignore reality.

Smelling Claire's desire was nothing compared to seeing it soaked through her undergarments every single night when my face was between her legs. It was torture. If only my enemies had this information, they'd know exactly how to bring me to my knees.

I'd give up blood for a month just for a taste of her sweet pussy. I'd sacrifice my life to make her smile.

The slow smile that had spread across my face shrank, and I cursed myself for being so weak-minded. It was truly pathetic how desperate I'd become.

Claiming her was an instinct I had to ignore, but doing so was like holding a lid over a boiling pot. The pressure building inside of me was unbearable.

At times of weakness, I considered showing her my bloodstone and confessing the truth. That we were meant to be, if only we wanted it.

But I kept the words behind my teeth, because I didn't want it. Couldn't want it. There was too much on the line, and Tyson's presence was a constant reminder of my oath to protect. If I gave in and told her, I'd lose it all. To him. And he was incapable of doing my job.

But at the same time, she was all I could think about. Even now, as I sat in this very important meeting with people I cared about and respected, I was distracted. Keeping my senses focused in the direction of my tent in case anything happened to her in my absence.

Comforted only by the steady rhythm of her heartbeat vibrating against my breastbone.

I wanted to know what she was doing right now. If she was thinking of me. If she was...touching herself. Satisfying that ache I knew she had.

I gritted my teeth just imagining the scene, wanting to relieve that ache for her. But it was impossible. I couldn't deepen my feelings for Claire more than they already were.

No, they weren't feelings. They were primal instincts. Urges put in my head by the gods that got the better of me each time I tried to keep them in check.

"Bastien!" Natalia shouted, slamming her hand down on the table. "We need your thoughts on the matter."

Every eye around the table was on me. Curious stares that portrayed confusion or disappointment.

I shook my head slightly, trying to bring my focus back to the meeting, and looking around for context clues. Another map had been rolled out in front of me, one that was of the south, specifically the land around Chateau Blanc, and I didn't know why the conversation had turned south of the capital.

I rubbed at my temples, realizing I hadn't heard a word that was said for some time.

I was distracted, which seemed to be my new normal.

Natalia sighed then pushed up her glasses. "What do we tell Josse? He has requested you attend his Sangination Ball four months' time, which he's hosting at his chateau. Will we be making the trip?"

I cleared my throat and turned my attention back to the map, trying to order my thoughts. My first inclination was to say no. I'd be leading a host into the Lawless Lands, and that might take a month. Maybe two. Traveling to Josse's castle would take another month.

It was cutting it too close, if truth be told, and Natalia wouldn't even have broached the subject with me if Josse hadn't been one of my favorite brothers.

I knew she longed to return to Blanc Lyon to see her family, which we hadn't done in some time.

Josse's land also encompassed the Nightfall Convent, which meant I might be able to take Claire to see her sister. Our scouts claimed the girl had reached the convent last week and had donated all the coin I'd given her to the sisters.

I had kept this news from Claire for fear of disappointing her.

I lifted my gaze to my council and folded my hands. "Perhaps the promise of warmer weather will give strength to our swords while we're freezing our asses off in the Lawless Lands."

A few chuckles went around the table. These men didn't need the promise of warm weather and dancing balls to motivate them, that's why they were on my council, but others did enjoy the time off.

I watched Natalia make a note in her journal before calling for a page to send a raven to Blanc Lyon. She was trying to hide her excitement. And so was I. Claire would be happy to hear this news, and I wanted to make her happy.

Once the task was handled, and I hoped all business had been finished, Natalia glanced around the table.

"Well?" I prompted, rubbing at my temples.

"What of Shreesa's plea?" Natalia asked. "How are we handling allegations that the Witches of the Light are doubling down on their pursuit of artifacts? She claims another has been taken by the Proctor coven. They are worried."

My hand tensed into a tight fist. After all that was sacrificed to make the Blood Treaty, I was growing weary of these continued hostilities. "We'll make good on our promise to bring more from the Lawless Lands."

This was my only solution for keeping the balance of power. Taking magick from the Witches of the Lawless Lands, who still made deals with demons.

"That will only last so long if they are being targeted!" Natalia practically shouted. "Shreesa says they don't have enough magick to bind familiars any longer, and all the beasts have died."

I stared at the map, thinking hard. As much as I wanted to hold the entire realm together by sheer force of will, I couldn't.

"Angelina Proctor doesn't have the resources or the support to make things worse," I said. "I'll speak to Marius about sending a larger patrol to keep peace north of the capital."

She nodded. "Very well."

After, I dismissed my council, ready to get back to her, but Natalia lingered. Her journal was still open, and her quill was in her hand, which meant she had something else for me.

"What is it?" I asked.

She gave me a half-grin that I didn't like.

"We arrive in Roselyn tomorrow, and we haven't discussed any details about how best to take care of your new orphan."

I reached for the edge of the leather map and started rolling it up, feigning indifference. I knew Natalia was suspicious of how protective I'd grown of Claire, and how much time I was spending with her.

"Claire will be cared for just like any other," I said, offhandedly, fixing the leather strap around the map and reaching for the next one. "She'll take the room adjoining mine, and will have attendants, and dresses, and anything else she desires."

Natalia hummed as she scribbled notes. I stood, ready to leave, when Natalia said, "And what about her harem? Tibitha's men are more than willing to stay on staff, if the lady wishes."

I froze midstep. Every protective instinct I had reared inside me. Despite knowing I shouldn't give this order, I did gladly. "Dismiss them. All of them."

Natalia let out a chuckle. "I'm tired. It's been a long trip on horseback. I'm not in the mood for your dark humor at the moment, Bastien."

I turned around, temper rising. I didn't like that she thought this was a joke. I'd never been more serious about anything in my life. No one would touch Claire. No one.

"It was not a joke. She will not have a harem."

Natalia was intrigued now. I could tell by the way she tipped her head to the side. She was twice as smart as any man on my council and equally as observant. "And why not?"

I knew I had to think logically here. I couldn't risk Natalia discovering the truth. As a member of the vampire nobility, if she knew Claire was my mate and did nothing, she'd be culpable in my crimes, and I didn't want that for her.

I had chosen to take my mate as my sanguine partner, against the laws, and I was the only one who would suffer for it.

"Because," I explained, "I don't think she wants one."

Natalia narrowed her eyes. "Did she tell you that?"

I considered lying, but instead, gritted out, "No."

This was an impossible situation, and I was beginning to understand why there were laws around leaving your post and returning to the capital when you found your mate. Having them around made a vampire impulsive and distracted.

But I was strong enough to keep my urges in check. I wasn't giving in to her. I was just...watching over her. Keeping her safe. When a year was up, I'd send her away to a palatial palace in the south where she could live a happy and well cared for life far away from me.

"Bastien, not that I trust this woman or even really like her, but it's your job to ensure she has all her needs met. That includes this particular need. You can't have her sneaking around with random strangers in dark corners, putting herself in mortal jeopardy. Or trying to leave the castle for a midnight rendezvous."

I turned away from her, trying to imagine a situation where Claire ran into the arms of another man, and I didn't rip that man to shreds.

"If she has a harem," Natalia continued, "her lovers will be well-vetted and paid handsomely for their services. And we can collect information about her from them."

My hands were shaking and I shoved them in my pockets to keep her from seeing how angry I was. But how could I say no when every other one of my sanguine partners had a harem? It would show Natalia I thought Claire was different, and I couldn't have that.

"Fine," I said at last. "Make the arrangements. But this is the last I want to hear of it."

Natalia made a note, then closed her book. "Very well. I will meet with Claire when we arrive at Chateau Rose, and we will get down to brass tacks." She laughed, and I gritted my teeth together. "I always enjoy this part of my job. Selecting the harem."

"I'm sure you do."

I pushed open the heavy tent flaps and stormed out. I stared at my tent for a few moments, breathing hard, trying to decide what to do or how to proceed. Did I go in the tent and feed from her, knowing that any day now, she was have another man between her legs? Feasting on parts of her that I wasn't allowed to taste?

I didn't return to my tent. Instead, I secluded myself in one of the tents designated for feedings.

I needed to release some of the pressure building inside me before I saw her again. I needed to work out this primal urge to fuck her. That's all this was. An urge. An urge that I could satisfy myself.

Undoing the buttons on my pants and letting them fall to my ankles, I sank onto one of the cushions. My stiff cock sprang free, ready and waiting.

Fisting my length, I told myself this was truly unhelpful to my cause. Imagining Claire's hands and mouth, so supple and sweet, fitted around me, wouldn't make being around her any easier. But despite everything, it's what I wanted, what I needed.

Slowly stroking myself, I gave in to every desire I had about my mate.

My body trembled with pleasure as I imagined pulling her into my lap and watching her ride me. Her tits bounce up and down as my hips bucked into her sweet center. Again and again. 

Claiming her as mine. Mine. All mine. Hearing her moaning my name as I sucked one of her nipples into my mouth.

"Claire," I whispered, working my stiff length harder. Faster. "I'm going to cum so deep inside you. I'm going to give you all of me." 

With that fantasy playing in my head, a few more hard jerks was all it took, and I was pushed over the edge. Coming harder than I'd ever remembered coming before.

I knew this was as close as we'd ever get.

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Oh who thinks every man in her harem is going to end up 🔪🔪🔪 🤣🤣🤣

Question: How much world building do you like in books? Some? A lot? Just give me the smut and forget about the stupid world?

There are no wrong answers. 🫶