The rain pours down all around me, getting steadily heavier. It is nice, feeling the coolness of the constant moisture on my skin, but I know I can't stay out here forever.

The moon shines down on me. For the first time in forever, I wish that I was not a werewolf. To have enough control over my life where I do not feel this itch of rut coming over me. It will only get stronger as the moon rises higher in the sky. But I do not want to spend a heat with my mates.

Mom had cornered me earlier today, asking about what I am going to do, and I honestly have no idea. My wolf is strong, way too close to the surface at the moment. The only thing grounding me is the coolness of the rain. It gives me something to focus on, cools off the raging heat spreading through my body.

This is so unlike any other rut I have felt before. It isn't just a tingling like all of my previous ruts. As the night passes, my skin begins to feel more and more like fire. It wouldn't be surprised it the rain falling on me began to steam.

"Rowan?" a voice calls out.

My wolf claws inside me, and I whip around, easily finding the person who belongs to the voice. Matty is slowly approaching me, his hair pressed flat against his face from the rain.

"You got my letter?"

My hands clench in the muddied grass, physically holding myself back from lunging at him. To hurt him or ravish him, I have no idea, and I am scared to find out.

Swallowing down the growl that is trying to emerge, I meet his eyes. "What letter?"

He comes closer then, stopping about a meter in front of me. His brows are scrunched in confusion. "I put a letter in your tent pocket. I- I thought that was why you were out here."

"No, I didn't get a letter. I-I haven't been home all day."

He nods then, arms crossing over his chest. The movement causes his soaking wet shirt to pull tight across his stomach.

And...

And there's a definite roundness there. One that has never been there before.

Matty clears his throat, cheeks turning bright red as he notices where my gaze is settled. "That's what I needed to talk to you about."

"Are- Are you...?"

He nods, voice a bit breathless. "Yeah. Twelve or so weeks." When I don't say anything, he looks away from me, rambling to fill my absence. "I didn't know how to tell you. And I didn't want you to be forced to be with me. So, I would understand if you didn't want anything to do with me- with us. I- I just thought you should know, since the baby is part of you too."

"Matty..."

As soon as he looks at me, something in me snaps. The wolf I have been trying so hard to keep under control rises to the surface, and I practically throw myself at him. We both tumble to the ground, Matty landing on top of me since I twisted in midair.

"Rowan, what the hell?" he murmurs, pushing himself up so that he is straddling my thighs.

My hands find their way from his hips over to his stomach, pushing away the damp piece of clothing so that I can touch the warm skin. There is barely anything there, just a tightness that had not been there previously.

My wolf seems split, one part wanting to push Matty away in order to go find my mates, but the other part just wants to pull Matty close, breathe in his scent of home and family. My want to be with Matty eventually wins out, and I just lean forward, pressing a kiss to his stomach before pulling him down into a messy kiss.

"Rowan," Matty whispers, pulling away from me enough so that he can look in my eyes. "Are you sure you want me?" When I try to talk, he just shakes his head. "No, you have to be really sure. Because I can't do this back and forth thing anymore. I either need you by my side and to have a real relationship, or for us to stay away from each other. It's hurting both of us too much to keep doing what we are doing."

His words cause me to pause, forcing my wolf back. Without the pull of my wolf, I am able to take a real look at Matty. There are dark circles under his eyes, making it obvious that he hasn't been sleeping. And the dejected slump of his shoulders has my heart aching.

"I want you," I push myself up, so that Matty is sitting in my lap. "And this baby. I want to be a family with you."

Matty's eyes are wide, and he doesn't say anything for a few seconds, just stares at me. After what seems like forever, he gives a small nod of his head. "I want that so badly," he whispers, "I want to be with you for the rest of my life and be happy together."

"Then that is exactly what we are going to do," I tell him, hand coming up to push the damp strands from his face. "Because that's all I want, too."

A shaky smile spreads across Matty's face before his hands settle behind my neck, pulling me into a deep kiss. The warmth of him pressed against me, causes my rut to come back into full focus. No longer can I ignore it.

Reluctantly, I break the kiss. "I'm in rut, love."

"I know," he tells me, eyes questioning.

"Are you sure you want to spend it with me? My wolf seems stronger than before, and I don't want to risk hurting you."

He smiles, leaning in to give me a chaste kiss on my lips. "I don't think you'll hurt me at all." He kisses me again. "Come back to my tent. I'd rather spend the night having sex on a real bed instead of out here in the mud."

No more encouragement is needed, and I stand up, hands falling to cup Matty's ass as I hold him up.

His eyes widen in shock before he falls into laughter, causing the heat inside me to increase ten-fold.

"I can walk, you know," he says.

"No," I murmur, leaning in to bury my nose in his neck. His scent is wonderfully warm and all him.

"Well, if you're going to carry me, you better get a move on," he says, and he rubs against me, our cocks only separated by thin layers of cloth. "Because I needed you inside me days ago."

A growl settles in my chest, and I pull myself together enough so that I can move towards Matty's tent. Thank everything out there that his tent is so close to the orchard, way closer than mine. It only takes about five minutes to get there, and no one else is around, making it feel as if we have the world to ourselves.

Matty's tent is wonderfully warm, a fire crackling in the makeshift woodstove in the corner. Reluctantly, I put Matty down so that we can both strip out of our clothes. The damp pile of clothes is forgotten as Matty grabs my hand, pulling me over to the mattress.

The scent of him overwhelms me as I sink down onto the bed. Matty pushes me on my back climbing on top of me so that he is straddling my hips. Bare skin is touching bare skin, and my rut rages inside me.

"God, Matty," I growl, hands tightening on my hips.

He just hums, leaning over me to grab a small vial before sitting back again. When I reach for it he just pulls it away, a coy smile on his face. "Uh-uh. You get to just watch."

Leaning back, I force my hands above by grabbing onto the sheets. The sight before me- Matty's bare skin on display- has my cock uncomfortably hard. All I want to do is be inside him already, but I force myself to wait and let him take control.

Matty bites his lip, eyes half-lidded as he works a slicked up finer inside of him. His fingers are out of sight, but I can see his arm moving as he works himself open. By the time that he must have at least three fingers inside him, I can feel my control slipping.

"Matty."

He hums, throwing the vial to the side and sliding up my body. Reaching down, he coats my cock with the rest of the lube on his hand before straddling me. The sight of him holding me while he slowly slinks down onto my cock has by knot already starting to grow.

Heat surrounds me, the tightness seeming perfect for my cock. Matty rests his hands on my chest as he rocks against me, seeming to revel in the feeling of being full.

"Touch me," Matty breathes, eyes meeting mine. "Please."

He doesn't have to ask me again. My hands are on him in a second, reveling in his smooth skin. Eventually, one hand settles on his stomach, while the other wraps around his cock. A small moan slips out of him as I pump his cock, and finally, he begins to do more than rock his hips. The sensation of him pulling off of my cock and sinking back down has my toes curling, the please something I haven't felt in weeks.

"So amazing," I whisper, planting my feet on the bed. Matty moans again when I start to meet his movements, the extra friction doing wonders. "So beautiful, my two loves."

Matty whimpers when my hand brushes against his stomach again, and he speeds up his thrusts. My knot is filling sooner than I like, but when I put my hands on Matty's waist to slow down his thrusts, he just looks down at me. The heat in his eyes has my hands falling away, letting him do whatever he wants with me.

He grinds down on me just as my knot fills completely, locking us together. But then he comes all over my stomach and chest, completely untouched, something that I have never seen him do before.

Wrapping my arms around him, I pull him gently to my chest, rolling us to our sides. Matty snuggles into me as I pull a blanket over us, fighting off the cold that is trying to keep into the tent.

The rain is still pounding outside, but I feel more at peace than I was at the beginning of the night. My wolf is calm, and for the first time in awhile, I feel completely in control of myself.

Matty dozes against me, and I revel in his closeness, hand running along his skin before settling on his slight baby bump. There is barely anything there, but I can't help but smile anyway. Before this, I had never even thought of being a parent. Now, I can't imagine not knowing about this baby that Matty and I created.

Relaxing into the bed, I pull the blanket tighter around us. My eyes crinkle slightly when I see the familiar fabric, and it takes me a second to put together what I am seeing. "Is this my blanket?"

Matty brings a finger up, resting it on my lips. "Shh, sleeping." A smile is on his face, and I can't help but to smile back, pulling him impossibly closer and breathing in the scent of family.

*****

Sorry for the late update, life is hectic.