While some coaches eased up on practices and conditioning after landing a spot in the playoffs late in the season, the Royals certainly didn't. Sure, if someone wasn't feeling one hundred percent—whether that be a new injury or old—they'd sit out, but getting the best seed possible was just as important as getting into the playoffs in the first place.

Which meant that as the season wound down, I was watching game tape with my new teammates, hitting the gym for longer than normal, and working with the offensive coach after practices on ways to even better amalgamate myself with my line mates.

It was hard work, but hopefully it'd pay off in the form of a Stanley Cup come June.

But before that, there were still three more regular season games to play, and since the team was flying up to Edmonton early tomorrow morning, Coach had more or less instructed us all to relax tonight. For the first time in over two weeks, I was ready to leave the arena before five 'o'clock.

"Yo, Wellsley," Quinn said, stepping out of the showers with a towel wrapped around his waist. "You up for pizza and video games at my place in an hour?"

Having already dressed, I nodded, digging through my bag for my phone. "Sure, man. I'll just—" I paused as I glanced down at my phone, which had been tucked away all day, to see two back-to-back phone calls from Lia around eleven this morning. And considering we mostly texted while she was at work, a bit of an uneasy feeling slithered into the pit of my stomach. "On second thought, I might take a rain check on that."

He lifted a brow. "Everything okay?"

"I'm not sure," I replied, raking a hand through my damp hair. "I have a few missed calls from Lia this afternoon, so I'm gonna head home and try to get a hold of her."

Another one of my teammates nudged me playfully in the side. "What'cha do that could've got you in hot water?"

"Nothing."

At least I was pretty sure I hadn't done anything that could've upset her.

"Don't worry," Quinn said, shoving my other teammate away to clap me on the shoulder. "I'm sure it's nothing. Or she could just be struggling with the long-distance thing. What's it been, like two or three weeks since you've seen each other?"

"Going on three, yeah."

"Then if it's anything, and I'm not saying it is, she probably just had a spare minute at work and was missing you."

"You should take this one's word on it," Ruderman said, jumping in as he passed us on the way out of the locker room. "After all, he's been tangled up with a woman in Texas for three years."

"I'm telling Bree you said that," Quinn mused, watching as Ruderman shrugged and waved goodbye.

"Your girlfriend lives in Texas?" I asked.

"Fiancée," he corrected.

"No shit."

He chuckled. "Some of the guys give me shit about it, especially because, other than a handful of weekends and holidays, we only really see each other on the off season. But we've made it work. Besides—" He shrugged. "—I know I'm not going to be in the league forever, she has a great job, and I know that she's the one for me. Every relationship is different, and when things are long distance, it just means communication is all the more important."

As I nodded, he moved to his locker to get change while I packed up and headed out to my truck, wondering if Lia and I's relationship was on the same path as Quinn's. Not that we were anywhere close to an engagement, hell no, but if the 'living-apart-for-years' path was the only avenue for long-distance relationships when both people had careers they were passionate about, then what did our future hold?

Would we be playing phone tag with one another for years to come? Or never be able to physically be in the same city, or even on the same coast, when one of us needed the other? Would we miss birthdays? Could I... could we... be in a relationship that was second string to the rest of our lives until we could devote more time to one another?

Was that fair to me? To her?

The whole way back to my condo, I had one foot on the gas and the other tapping anxiously along to the radio, and my hands were clenched around the steering wheel. I didn't like the thoughts swirling around my head. Not one bit. And for a moment, wished I'd left the locker room a few minutes earlier. If only I had, I might've missed Quinn's views on long-distance.

Because while they worked for him, I wasn't sure they worked for me.

By the time I reached my place, my mind was a mess, and when I pulled my phone out of my bag, I saw another missed call from Lia.

Collapsing on the couch, I raked my fingers through my hair as I called her back.

She answered on the third ring.

"Hello."

"Hey you," I drawled. Just the sound of her voice had a small weight lifting off my chest.

If she were here, I imagined myself wrapping my arms loosely around her waist, my hands skimming over her ass while I pulled her body closer. Then I'd dip my head and kiss her smile, content in enjoying the company and affection of the amazing woman that stumbled into my path—quite literally—a few months back.

Instead, I sat alone, waiting to hear her speak again.

"How was your day?" she asked after a few moments. "I'm guessing things were busy?"

I hesitated with my answer, noticing her voice had taken on a monotone note. "They were," I said cautiously, "but are you okay? I saw you'd called a few times this afternoon. Did something happen at work? Are you sick?"

My chest tightened when her dry, tear-filled laugh traveled over the speaker. "How can you do that? How can you just tell that something's wrong?"

"Because, babe, I've been paying attention," I replied softly. "I'm going to hang up and call you back with video."

I heard her say 'okay' before the line went dead, and I quickly opened FaceTime, clicking on her name from my recent call list.

Once the call connected and her face popped up on my screen, her distress was even more evident. She was laying in bed—which, after yesterday, should've been something that got my gears going—but it didn't. Not one bit. Instead, I wished I could jump to the east coast, because she was wearing pajamas, blankets wrapped around her, hair piled messily atop her head, and her eyes were on the red side; cheeks stained with tears.

But despite that, I noticed she tried to muster a smile.

"Hey." My voice was soft and gentle, hopefully a source of comfort for her. "Do you want to talk about it?"

I didn't know what'd happened, but it was clear that something had caused her day to go up in flames.

"You remember Miles?" she asked, a hiccup punctuating her words.

I nodded. "Yeah..."

"Well," she started, sniffling before launching into a recount of her morning. How it'd been Miles day to present his defense to the department and she'd gone to support him. How he'd done a great job and seemed to really impress everyone in the room. And then, how he'd somehow gotten a hold of her latest research findings. How he'd used the work she'd spent the last month on to end his presentation on a high note, and how she'd been so taken aback that, as soon as she could, she bolted from the room.

"What the fuck?" I asked, my nostrils flaring as anger bubbled in my veins. "That's complete and utter bullshit. Can he get away with that?"

"I don't know," she replied, her chin quivering as she burrowed further in her blankets. "I-I don't think so, but the idea for that research sprouted after reviewing his results in the first place. He could claim that it was an extension of his own work."

"Did anyone in your department know what you were working on?"

She nodded. "Our supervising professor did," she replied.

"Well, then she can confirm the work was yours, right?"

"I hope so, but I didn't get a chance to talk to her before I left." Her voice cracked, and tears began to fill her eyes. "My thoughts were going haywire and I couldn't take the chance that he'd come back to our office because I honestly might've lost it on him."

"Which is fair," I said. "You shouldn't have to deal with him, Lia. That guy's an asshole."

"And to think, everyone always thought that he was into me." A bitter laugh escaped her lips. "Now we know that he was just using my friendship as a way to exploit my work and push himself further ahead."

The blunt sarcasm was a sharp contrast to her whispered words of anguish, and it felt like a hand was tightening around my heart watching her sadness shift to anger.

It threw me back to the middle of February, when the rumors surrounding my trade were ramping up. When I'd been closed off and infuriated by the hand I'd been dealt. How the team that'd truly built up my career had all but thrown me out with the trash when I was no longer of use to them.

Only her situation was worse because she hadn't seen the betrayal coming.

And I couldn't be there for her like she'd been for me.

"I'm sorry," I said softly. "I don't really know what to say to make you feel better, or if I can say anything at all. I just wish I was there with you."

"Except you're not."

Taken aback by her directness, I was stunned speechless, and watched as her eyes widened once she realized what had slipped out.

"I'm sorry," she whispered, squeezing her eyes shut for a moment. "I'm just frustrated and—"

"Lia, it's okay," I cut in. "I want to know when you're upset, even when it's with me."

All of a sudden, the thoughts surrounding Quinn and long-distance relationships—which had been slowly making their way to the back corner of my mind—were once again front and center. Devilish and haunting, warping my ability to think clearly.

"But look," I started again, carefully trying to search her features before sighing, "if you're having regrets about us..."

"About us?" Lia repeated. Her forehead creased and a shot of surprise flickered in her irises. "Why would I be regretting us?"

I must've looked like a deer caught in a set of headlights as I stammered through my response. "Isn't that what you were saying? That you're upset I can't be there for you?"

"No, Derrick," she said sharply. "I'm emotional because Miles could've fucked up everything I've worked hard for over the last five years. If I can't rely on my latest research, then my defense won't be nearly as strong as it could've been, and if I don't nail it, the department can easily choose another candidate for the lecturing position. I'm upset and worried about my career, but now you're telling me I should also be worried about this relationship between us not working out?"

I flinched at her words. "That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?" she asked. "Because it sure sounded like you were suddenly having second thoughts about long-distance being able to work."

"I'm—"

"Does it suck that you're not here right now? Sure. But I knew that would be a part of this going in. And I thought you did too, considering you're the one that brought up the idea of continuing to see one another despite the fact you're now based in Los Angeles."

"I did know that."

"Yet I still vividly remember you also saying that your last relationship failed because your ex thought you couldn't balance your feelings and the distance. And maybe she was right." Those words hurt like a shot to the chest. "Clearly you still have some deep-rooted issues about being able to handle a relationship, so maybe you should get those sorted out before trying to offer your shoulder for me to cry on."

There was nothing left for me to say, mostly because she clearly didn't want to hear it. Disconnecting the chat from her end, my phone screen went black, and I was left looking at the guilt seeping into my expression.

Tossing my phone aside, I groaned loudly, leaning forward as I combed my fingers through my hair with frustration. Because if there was one thing I knew for certain, it was that I'd royally fucked that up. 

a/n: don't hate me, lmao

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