Asad

When Nadir's first text came in, I had just finished making my way to the living room at my parents' house, ready to settle in for the evening. My phone buzzed, the notification lighting up the screen.

Bro, things are heating up here. You won't believe what's being discussed.

I frowned slightly, my thumb hovering over the screen.

Seconds later, another text came in.

They're talking about tying it today.

My heart stuttered at the words, a strange mix of exhilaration and nervousness tightening in my chest. For a moment, I just stared at the message. Tying it today. The very idea sent my thoughts spiraling. I leaned back against the sofa, staring blankly at the ceiling as my mind raced.

It wasn't like I didn't want this, it was, after all, exactly what I had hoped for when I sent that proposal through Malik. From the moment I met Layla, even briefly, I had known I wanted her in my life. Her presence, her voice, and the way she spoke had all left a mark on me, one I couldn't shake even if I tried. And after Malik delivered my proposal, the idea of having her as my wife wasn't just a passing thought anymore. It had become something tangible, something I truly desired.

But this? Now? I hadn't expected it to happen this fast. Still, as I reread Nadir's words, a quiet, unspoken part of me was thrilled. My brother kept texting, detailing snippets of the elders' conversations. As I absorbed each message, I found myself silently praying that they'd follow through with it.

Some of the uncles are saying it's better to just get it done.

Nadir wrote, followed by another.

They are saying no point in dragging things out, right? 

They were echoing exactly what I had been thinking. Marriage didn't have to be as complicated as this generation made it seem. Too many unnecessary steps, and endless formalities, it all felt like a distraction from what truly mattered. I wasn't one to overanalyze or overcomplicate things. To me, getting married quickly, and avoiding the drawn-out chaos, seemed logical. Efficient. Right.

I have always hated Nadir's style of texting one sentence in one text because it was very unnecessary but right there, I found myself happily waiting for them.

When Nadir's final text came through, confirming that the elders had made the decision and were moving forward with the marriage, I was caught between two overwhelming ends. Relief because this was what I wanted. And guilt because I suddenly wasn't sure if it was what Layla wanted. 

And then it happened. Just like that, we were married. A simple nikah, officiated in the living room of her family's house, with the elders. I wasn't even there when it was finalized. Nadir sent me a quick text.

Congrats, bro. You're a married man now.

Married. 

The word didn't feel real, even as I read it on my screen. My heart raced, but my thoughts felt oddly numb. I hadn't processed it, not fully. An hour had passed since it happened, and yet the reality of it still hadn't sunk in. 

Was this a good thing? I didn't know. 

I hesitated before sending her a text.

Layla? Are you okay?

No reply. 

And suddenly, that quiet thrill I had been feeling started to waver. I couldn't help but think about her silence as usually replied immediately. Was she overwhelmed? Upset? Did she feel like she was being forced into this? The thought tightened my chest, an uncomfortable knot forming there. I wanted this, there was no doubt in my mind. But I didn't want her to feel like she had no say in the matter. That wasn't the kind of start I envisioned for us.

The minutes dragged on, each one stretching into an eternity. I tried to reassure myself, telling myself that she was probably busy or caught up in the discussions. But deep down, I couldn't shake the gnawing worry. I tried again.

I hope you're not too upset about what's happening.

Still nothing. 

Maybe it was because I expected her to respond instantly, but the silence felt heavier with each passing moment. I tapped the phone against my knee, debating whether to call her. After a few moments of hesitation, I pressed her name in my contact list. The line rang, once, twice, and then, nothing. No answer.

I tried again, this time more urgently. But instead of the ringing tone, I was met with a dull message, "The number you are trying to reach is unavailable."

The knot in my chest tightened further, turning into something almost suffocating. I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees, my phone still clutched tightly in my hand. What did it mean? Was she angry? Did she hate the idea of this impromptu marriage? My mind spiraled through a thousand possibilities, none of them comforting. 

I was happy, of course, I was. This was what I wanted from the beginning. But there was a weight to it now, one I hadn't anticipated.

I wasn't good at deciphering people's emotions, it was something I had always struggled with. Even now, I couldn't pinpoint what she might be feeling, and it frustrated me. All I knew was that her silence wasn't a good sign. 

I went on my knees and prostrated regardless.

With my heart brimming with gratitude and a deep sense of tranquility, I felt an unshakable calm settle over me. The smile on my face wasn't just a fleeting expression, it was a reflection of the deep joy and contentment that was engraved within me. It felt as though my very soul was smiling that couldn't be hidden even if I tried. In my heart, everything felt perfectly aligned, as though the the blessings of Allah was wrapping me in an embrace.

It felt like the longest hour of my life.

-------------

It felt like the longest hour of my life.

Sitting in the living room of my parent's house, I tried to make sense of everything that had happened. When Nadir told me about the elders' decision, I had barely managed to keep a straight face. I stayed composed, even as my mind raced. Married? Just like that? Not tomorrow, not next month, but today?

It felt surreal. One moment, we were exchanging polite pleasantries before they left for the introduction, and the next, my uncles and hers had decided to knot the marriage on the spot. An impulsive decision dressed in tradition and respect, but one I couldn't quite wrap my head around yet.

I leaned back in the plush armchair, the familiar scent of home grounding me. It was the weekend, and I'd spent the night here as I often did but I had late-night conversations with Uncle Ahmad yesterday. He had only just landed after a long trip from Saudi, and though he was visibly tired last night, we stayed up catching up even after I kept pressing that he went and rested.

The sound of soft footsteps snapped me out of my thoughts. Ammi walked into the living room, her expression a mix of stress and something else I couldn't quite place. Worry, perhaps.

"Habibi," she began, her voice gentle but heavy. She sat across from me, "I know you're probably still processing everything..."

I stayed silent, sensing she wasn't done.

"I just want to say... this decision, it happened so quickly. Your uncles and father..." She paused, glancing at me, clearly trying to find the right words. "I know you. And I know you've always been... thoughtful about these things. You take time, Asad. And now, with everything..."

Her voice trailed off, but her eyes spoke volumes.

"Ammi," I said softly, leaning forward. "I wanted this."

She frowned slightly, searching my face for something. "You wanted to marry her, yes. But like this? So suddenly? You weren't given the time to think it through." Her voice remained calm, but I could hear the tension beneath it.

I moved closer, slowly taking her hand in mine. "Ammi, please don't stress yourself over this. I've been sure about Layla from the start."

Her lips pressed into a thin line, but she let me guide her to sit down properly beside me. "It's not just about the marriage," She murmured, her tone quieter now. "It's about you. Your... I just want what's best for you, Asad."

I exhaled deeply, trying to keep my composure. "I know, Ammi. And I understand why you're worried. But trust me, please. This is a good thing. I'll handle it."

Her eyes glistened as I kissed her forehead. "You're so much like your father sometimes," She whispered.

Before I could respond, the door creaked open, and Abu walked in. His presence always filled a room, quiet yet commanding. He and my uncles had just gotten back from Layla's home. He glanced between Ammi and me, his brow furrowed slightly.

"Malam," He said, his voice steady, "I need to talk to you."

I stood, about to follow him, but Ammi's voice cut through the tension like a blade.

"You two can talk after we're done," She said, her tone sharp but controlled. She turned to Abu, her expression firmer now. "This is important."

Abu raised an eyebrow, clearly taken aback by her assertiveness, but he nodded and left the room without another word.

I left the room, my mind racing. As I performed wudu and prayed, I couldn't shake the unease settling in my chest. When I returned to the hallway outside the living room, I heard raised voices. Ammi's voice.

That was unusual.

I paused, my hand hovering over the door, but the words filtered through.

"This isn't fair," Ammi was saying, her voice strained. "You know Asad. You know how he is with... with people. He needs time to adjust. You can't just throw something like this at him and expect him to be fine."

Abu's reply was calm but firm. "He's not a child, my love. He's a man. He wanted this marriage. And he will rise to the occasion."

"But you know how he struggles. You know." Her voice cracked slightly, and I felt a pang of guilt.

"I do," Abu said, his tone softening. "But I also know my son. He's stronger than you give him credit for."

Their words hit me harder than I expected. They were talking about me, of course, about how I navigate the world, how I adjust, or don't, to change.

I knocked lightly on the door, signaling my presence. The voices quieted, and Ammi called me in.

She looked at me, her eyes filled with a mix of worry and love. "Habibi, come sit."

I stepped inside, my heart heavy but determined.

Ammi paced the room, her hands tightly clutching her dress, her face a mixture of worry and frustration. She hadn't even sat back down after her initial outburst, and I could feel the weight of her emotions. She had concerns for Layla now too and they were genuine, pouring out in a way that made me momentarily forget my own jumbled thoughts.

"I can't stop thinking about Layla," She started, her voice trembling slightly. "Do you know how many dreams girls have about their weddings? Their day. Their special day! It's supposed to be filled with excitement, laughter, and memories that last a lifetime. And instead..." She paused, her eyes darting to Abu and then to me, as if willing us to understand the gravity of the situation. "Instead no warning, no celebration, no... no nothing!"

I tried to interject, raising my hand slightly. "Ammi, I—"

But she waved me off, her words spilling out faster than I could keep up. "No, let me finish. That poor girl might have dreamt of wearing a beautiful dress, having her family around, maybe even choosing flowers or a cake. Do you know how many little things girls plan in their minds? How can we expect her to be happy about this? Do you think she'll ever look back at this moment fondly?"

Her voice cracked at the last sentence, and I felt a pang of guilt deep in my chest. I had considered Layla's feelings in that way. Sure, I knew this wasn't the ideal situation, but Ammi's words and Layla's silence painted a stark picture of the loss Layla might be feeling right now.

Abu cleared his throat softly, but before he could speak, Ammi turned to him. "And you!" She pointed a finger at him, though her tone wasn't accusatory, just exasperated. "You men!"

Her gaze softened as she looked at me again. "Habibi, I had so many plans for your wedding." Her voice was heavy with emotion now, her frustration giving way to sadness. "I imagined a big celebration. And now... this. It's been taken from me too."

I opened my mouth to reassure her, but she raised a hand, stopping me. "And what about Layla's family? Do you think they're thrilled about this either?"

Abu leaned back in his chair, trying to speak again, but Ammi cut him off once more. "Don't even start. I know what you're going to say, but you can't just bulldoze over everyone's feelings and expect it to work out perfectly."

She sighed heavily, her shoulders slumping as she finally sat down on the edge of the sofa. "And back to you," She said, looking directly at me, "you're just standing there so calm, but I know you. How could they make this decision for you without even asking?"

Her words hit me like a tidal wave. It wasn't often that Ammi spoke so openly about me like this, and I could feel the sincerity in her voice.

I moved closer to her and knelt beside the sofa, gently taking her hand in mine. "Ammi, I understand what you're saying," I said softly, my voice calm but firm. "But you have to trust me. I wanted this. Maybe not in this way, but I did want this. I promise you, I'll do my best to make things right, for Layla and for us."

She looked at me, her eyes searching mine for any sign of hesitation. "You say that now, Asad, but what about later? What happens if things get difficult? Will you still feel the same?"

"I will. Ammi, I am really a grown man, you seem to be forgetting that." I joked, squeezing her hand gently. "I know this isn't ideal, but I'm willing to take responsibility for this. Layla deserves someone who will try, and I'll try, Ammi. I'll give it my all."

She exhaled deeply, her expression softening just slightly. But before I could feel any sense of relief, she stood abruptly, pulling her hand away. "Well, I'm not going to sit here and do nothing," She said, more to herself than to us. "I need to fix this. I don't know how, but I have to make things better for her, for both of you."

With that, she swept out of the room, leaving a trail of tension in her wake. My eyebrows furrowed in confusion at her last words. Abu and I sat in silence for a moment, her words hanging heavily in the air.

Finally, Abu sighed, leaning back in his chair with a tired smile. "See what I told you?" He said his tone light despite the situation. "Women. Always full of fire."

I couldn't help but chuckle under my breath, shaking my head as I stood to follow him. "You're not wrong, Abu," I said, my voice tinged with affection. But deep down, I couldn't ignore the weight of Ammi's words and the daunting task ahead.

Nonetheless, a smile threatened to reveal itself, I tried to suppress it but it still appeared.

———————
Hello readers,

Hope this met everyone in the best of health💕

You guys waited for this and the next chapter but I'm sure it's totally worth it😅 I love the dms and comments you all dropped in these past few days and appreciated every single one of them, knew i had to write 2 chapters to show gratitude💕

Now, off you go to the next chapter😅💕

Let's connect on IG: @husna_thewriter