Phone Guy...

You calling Main Character of the Game, or in this Story's case

Me!

IT'S YOU, WHO IS SON OF A BITCH!

I'LL RIP THAT PHONE FOR THE HEAD OF YOURS AND PLACE INTO YOUR ASSHOLE!

And I'm not a filthy Animal!

You're a filthy Animal!

... Where did you get that weapon!

Hey, hey, hey, hey!

THE FUCK YOU'RE DOING?!

PUT IT ON THE FLOOR!

*Bang*

Phone Guy: Merry Christmas, bitches