Chapter 36 – Harry’s P.O.V.

            I’m freaking the fuck out.

            As if leaving tomorrow wasn’t bad enough, Valerie had to go and stop breathing. Stupid shitty lungs of hers. I wish there was more I could do, but the only thing I’m able to do is sit in a hospital chair by her bed, squeezing her hand. I haven’t cried… yet, but I feel like it’s bound to happen as soon as she wakes up. She’s got this oxygen mask on, wires hooked in every section of her exposed arms. She looks pitiful.

            The nurse called her parents, of course, and they came by not too long ago. Her mother was practically falling asleep sitting up, after telling me how frequent this used to occur. Her father just looked depressed, neither of them speaking as they kept to themselves. They both looked exhausted, so I was being the gentleman I am and told them I’d stay with Valerie so they could go home and rest. Her mother didn’t seem too sure to leave at first, but I promised I’d call if anything happened.

            I guess they trusted me.

            After the boys woke up with the sirens and freaked out at the unconscious Valerie in my arms, I told them to go to bed as well. They promised to come first thing in the morning, and even then it took more convincing that she’d be fine. From the paramedic, that is. I was one of the ones thinking negatively, although I know I shouldn’t be. Valerie’s strong; she can do this.

            …Right?

            As I’ve said plenty of times since I’ve laid eyes on Valerie, I don’t know what’s happening to me. This girl, this girl I’ve known for merely three weeks now has been such a huge part of my life, it’s indescribable. Yes, it’s about time I’ve admitted it, honestly…

            I’m in love with Valerie Marie Anderson.

            So soon, you ask? Hell, I asked myself the same thing. I’ve heard of people being “in love” within two days of knowing each other, but that’s ridiculous to me. Sure I haven’t known Valerie long, but I sure as hell have been through a lot with her in two and a half weeks. With management and all, not to mention I literally spent my entire break with her. She tried to do some makeup work, but I just wouldn’t allow it. I wanted her to spend time with me. Only me.

            Possessive? Oh well, I can’t help it.

            To drag me out of my swirling thoughts, Valerie let out a low grunt as her eyes pinched tighter together. It was almost instinctive to immediately turn to look at her, just because the fact that she’s still breathing is enough to make me ecstatic.

            “Harry,” she murmured in a hoarse voice, and I’d be lying if I said that didn’t make me happy. I’m the first person she wants to see when she wakes up? The thought alone put a smile on my fact.

            “I’m right here,” I assured her, running my thumb across her knuckles as she gripped my hand.

            “My heart hurts,” she grumbled.

            This wasn’t the time when Valerie said that because she was fangirling over some celebrity. No, this was because she meant it. That deranged heart of hers has put her into a world of trouble, and for that I feel sorry for her. Honestly, I’d switch hearts with her any day just so she wouldn’t have to feel any pain. She doesn’t deserve it.

            “I’m sorry, baby. Do you need anything?”

            Fuck. I wanted to shoot myself just for calling her that petty name out loud. Of course I’ve slipped up and said it before, but this time… it held actual meaning. I’m fucking in love with this girl.

            Valerie slowly shook her head, her now open eyes welling with tears. Her grip tightened on my hand, a lone tear rolling down her cheek. I fucking hate seeing her in this much pain; I hate it.

            “I don’t want to leave you tomorrow,” I whispered as I felt the emotions lumping in my throat. It was actually two in the morning right now, but I didn’t care. I just wanted to be with her and make her pain go away. I felt like a failure, truthfully, just because I couldn’t do the one thing she needed. I couldn’t heal her, and that made me feel like absolute shit.

            “You have too,” she whispered back, giving me a pained smile as she held my hand. “Conquer the world, right?”

            I managed a weak laugh, shaking my head. “That’s why.”

            Valerie frowned, blinking her agonizing tears away. “What’s why?”

            Sucking in a shaky breath, I looked up at Valerie with a small smile tugging at my lips. I knew I had to tell her now that it’s confirmed; she deserves to know. “Why I fell in love with you,” I said softly, not even caring how pathetic I sounded.

            Valerie’s face drained of the little color it contained (she was already pale from her fainting ability back in the hotel—fun, right?), her eyes widening slightly as she stared at me, her tears returned. “You… You what?” she breathed out in utter disbelief, the oxygen mask fogging up with her words.

            “I do. I’ve recently come to this… this conclusion, I guess you could call it. I was shocked myself, honestly, but I don’t regret it. This feeling is new to me, Valerie, but I’m glad it’s with you. Since we’re already being pretty cheesy right now, I’ll just spill the beans,” I said, earning a faint smile from Valerie as she started crying once more. I smiled back before saying, “I love you, Valerie. I love your hair, your eyes, your laugh, and even that insane fangirl side of you. I’ll admit that I get jealous when I see you freaking out over other people, because I want to be the only one. Maybe that sounds possessive, but I want to have that honor of making you smile. I want to be in charge of keeping that gorgeous grin on your face. Your crazy, bubbly, downright adorable personality is what really made me cave, I think.

            “Maybe this is insane or a little early, but what’s wrong with being different, right? You’re different, but I like that about you. I know—even though you think differently—that I’d never in my wildest dreams find anyone like you. You’re one of a kind, Valerie. And I want that one of a kind to be mine. I want all of you; your flaws, your giggles, your incessant rambling, all of it.” I let out a faint laugh, shaking my head to myself before looking back up at the now full-out sobbing Valerie. “I’m in love with you, Valerie.”

            I hadn’t meant to whisper the last sentence, but I nearly felt out of breath from my speech. I felt like Valerie, honestly, since she always seems to just spill out words. But I love that about her; I adore it.

            Valerie was quiet a long moment, just crying and gripping my hand and I had that uneasy feeling where I said something wrong. I didn’t want her to reject me, to tell me it was too soon. That would absolutely crush me. I’ve never felt this way towards anyone; this strong attraction where all I want to do is be around her. I just want her near twenty-four-seven. I just want to hold her at night. I just want to kiss her every chance I get. I just… I want her, more than anything in my life.

            “I can’t…” Valerie choked on her words with a faint giggle. “I can’t believe you just said all of that.”

            “You hated it, didn’t you? Shit, I knew I would screw up.” I raked a nervous hand through my hair.

            “No, no!” Valerie said immediately, lifting our locked hands to gather my attention once more. Valerie smiled, wiping her cheeks where the oxygen mask wasn’t covering. “You said all the right things, Harry. I just… No one has ever said anything like that to me before,” she said quietly before her tears picked up again. “It’s just… a shock, I guess. I never thought you’d feel that way towards me.”

            “I didn’t know either, honestly. But like I said, I’m glad I do,” I said with a smile.

            Valerie laughed faintly, shaking her head. “You’re incredible. I can’t even.”

            I laughed at her fangirl language, grinning to myself before a thought hit me. I know it’s a pathetic thought, but I can’t help it; she hasn’t said it back.

            As if reading my mind (or sad expression—I couldn’t tell), Valerie smiled at me. “I love you, too, Harry Styles.”

            I’m sure my face lit up like an idiot, but I couldn’t help it. “You do?”

            Valerie nodded. “I do, and I promise not just because you’re famous. I read an article that said you don’t want to be used, but God, I’d love you anyway. Probably even if you were just a hobo on the streets.”

            I laughed, knowing exactly that this was still the same Valerie, heart disease or not. This was the true girl I fell in love with, the one that always speaks her mind, the one that never lies, not even to her biggest idols. She doesn’t try to flaunt anything, nor does she try to be someone she isn’t for attention. She’s Valerie. My Valerie. No one could change this girl, not even if they wanted to. I loved that about her.

            “How are you feeling, love?”

            “My chest still hurts,” she answered with a sigh. Then she looked at me with concerned eyes. “You need to get some sleep, Harry. You have to be on a plan in a few hours, don’t you?”

            I smiled. “That’s why I just sleep on the plane. I can’t go to sleep with only a few hours left with you.”

            Valerie smiled, then scrunched her face as I assumed her chest was hurting again. “I fucking hate this thing,” she growled under her breath as she motioned to the oxygen mask.

            “You need it, love. Although it does make you look pretty pitiful.”

            “Whale, thanks.”

            “Whale, you’re welcome,” I teased.

            Valerie giggled before slapping me playfully in the shoulder. Her face went serious again as she gave my hand a light squeeze. “I’m sorry for waking you up because of this.”

            I shook my head. “Valerie, you are the only person I know that would apologize for fainting.”

            Valerie chuckled lightly. “I can’t help it. I feel bad.”

            “Don’t, dammit. You didn’t do anything wrong. You can’t help that screwed up heart of yours,” I reminded her.

            “I know,” Valerie said, sighing straight after. “Have my parents been here yet?”

            “Yeah, they said they’ll be back in the morning.”

            She nodded.

            Valerie looked as if she were dozing off again, but her grip on my hand hadn’t loosened. “Will you stay with me?” she asked quietly, her lips barely moving with her words as sleep was slowly coming for her.

            I smiled, leaning up and kissing her temple before sitting back down, my hand still in hers. “Always,” I said without the slightest hesitation.

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A/N: So, that happened xD I really don't have much more to say, except that the next update should be Friday <3

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