She asked him to take her to it, her headstone. The one they made for her when she (Or rather 'Connie Maheswaran') supposedly died. She didn't exactly know why she wanted to see it; maybe it would jog some memories of who she was before becoming ' Sara's grand jewel' ...Before becoming 'Sheva.' Even the thought of those times enrages her to no end; how Connie was used as a tool of murder, espionage, seduction, and entrapment.

"Connie, you ok?"

Steven's voice, sweet, protective, and lovingly caring, as was his grip on her shoulder. The way her name ( Connie's name) came out of his voice sent waves of affection throughout her nervous system. Even after a month of traveling together, she still wasn't used to the new [old] moniker, nor did she feel she deserved it, but she wasn't going to stop Steven from calling her that.

"Connie?"

"Y-Yeah!" It came out brokenly harsh, more than initially intended.

"Sorry, Connie."

The guilt in his voice, slight as it was, hurt her heart immensely.

"No-nonono! You're ok! I promise, and I'm stupid, pleasekeepholdingmyshoulders !"

She covered her mouth and turned around before she became more of a babbling mess, something that has been becoming more common.

Ever since that dream...Hell, ever since they reunited (met), told her his name, and ripped that collar off of her; that spark of need, of craving...Of humanity seem to grow brighter gradually with every smile, touch, or kind deed her hero sent her way and how scared it made her to lose him. The adoration he sent her way, how it warmed her heart to the point of feeling burned.

How she would excuse herself before breaking into full-on bawling on more than one occasion. Steven was wasting it on her; she couldn't even understand natural human affection anymore.

She was so broken.

Connie breathed out before turning to him. "I'm...sorry that was weird of me...I'm strange...And umm... Nervous."

"I would believe so," He gave her a ginger smirk, holding his hand out to her," We're about to visit your memorial. "

"Connie's memorial." She snided before she could stop herself. "Ah..I-"

"One and the same." Steven interrupted, kissing her hand softly before massaging it with his thumb as he interlaced his hands with hers, giving her a small but loving smile. "Come on. You don't want anyone to find us, right?" He whispered, wiping her cheek of a runaway tear.

She could only nod and offer him a silent smile. He was right; she didn't want any of the residents of his (and hers as well, she figured) hometown to know they were here(her nervousness, caused by him).

It was twilight when they traveled to the cliff overlooking Beach City and Little Homeworld (spending most of their day at an abandoned lighthouse), remaining unnoticed by the populace (their attention on something called ' Beach-a-palooza'). What greeted them was not a simple headstone.

In her sights was a statue of who she was...Of ' Connie Maheswaran.' Made of marble, Ice and layered by some illuminated solid of cobalt stood a picture-perfect image of herself(?)Brandishing a naked blade on her shoulder with a star hilt, silky hair flowing down to her upper-back with some resting on her shoulders and an attractive bang, dressed in a crop letterman jacket with a star on the breast over a sporty halter top, low-rise Bermuda shorts, a pair of thigh-high stockings some loosely laced boots but obviously secured.

'Well...At least, they didn't take my fashion sense.' She mused, taking a look at her current outfit, a mimic of the statues (ironic or inherited, she didn't know). Looking back up, she focused on the differences.

'Connie's' hair was loose, free, and weightless, while hers was in a tightly braided and heavy reaching her waist.

'Connie's eyes were determined, fiery, full of life and light. In contrast, her eyes were duller, colder, and steeled by guilt (though being with Steven has brightened them up a bit.)

The most contrasting thing would have to be the smile.

Looking at her past self, at 'Connie's' bright and confident grin that displayed her teeth and radiated victory and promise, made her feel small. Seeing that kind of smile on that face, on their face, was so foreign and daunting to her. Someone who hasn't truly smiled or laughed until a month ago, which was due to killing her tormentor (who she still has sob evoking nightmares about). Even still, her smiles were weakly small, few, and full of painful appreciation.

Connie's' laughing, even more so.

"She's beautiful," Connie spoke in reverence to the memorial as she walked into the small garden on Bluebells, Hibiscus, and Orchids with various pictures of her past life that surrounded the statue. Photos of trips with human and gem friends, graduations, various other accomplishments...Moments of bliss with Steven(some with a pink lion).

"She had her whole future ahead of her."

"You can still have a bright future." Steven's voice from behind her.

"Heh." She scoffed, "You're sweet." She turned her eyes to the description under the statue.

- Connie Maheswaran

Student, Friend, Daughter, Sister,

Cherished Crystal Gem & Adored Jambud.

Our valorous knight, who outshines diamonds and stars alike.-

"It's hard to believe that I was her."

" Are ...You are her."

Connie shook her head, "we aren't the same."

"Connie?"

"I don't have that smile."

"You do."

"I'm not that strong."

"You are."

"I can't be as warm as her."

"You can."

"NO, I CAN'T !" Connie yelled, holding herself tightly, "I'm tainted, Steven...Broken. '' she rolled up the back of her top, exposing the numerous shards integrated into her brown back.

"A pile of shards upon flesh from years of experimentation and 'education ,' made into a masterpiece of murder, of violence, of spying, of abduction, of sex." She spat in disgust, nostrils flaring in anger. " How dare you?"

"Connie?" Steven took a step towards the angered ex-weapon.

"How dare you say that about her?" She hiked her breath as a sob came out." How dare you insult her by saying we're the same!? "

"Connie!" Steven turned her to face him. " Rather you want to admit it or not; it doesn't change the fact... You are her!" He said sternly.

"No..." she shook her head. "I can't believe that I can't."

"Connie?"

"She wouldn't do the things I've done."

"You can't blame yourself...You..." He tightened his hold on her shoulders, "they violated you, abused you...You are a victim in this."

"Exactly..."

Steven looked as she stepped out of his hold and pointed to the statue. Her fist clenched and face down. "She's not a victim..."

"Connie..."

"She would never have been a victim. Captured and made into a weapon...a tool." She started to laugh, a shallow sob still in her throat. "This is stupid...I came looking for ways to jog my memory and now, that face to face with it. I wanna reject it."

Steven kept silent as he pulled her in his torso, his arms around Connie's back and nape, keeping her close as she soaked his shirt.

"I'm jealous..."

Steven gazed at the top of her head as she gripped his shirt.

"I'm jealous..." Connie admitted through closed eyes, gritting teeth, trembling lips, and running tears. "I'm jealous at how determined I was. How accomplished I was. How large and bright my smile was..." she looked up at him. " How easy it was to reciprocate your love." It took all her will not to run when he wiped her eyes of tears." She did it so easy, right?"

"You..." He corrected, "You did..."

"Of course.. bet she didn't run from your affection. Lock herself away to cry...Cause she didn't know how to deal with honest adoration...It wasted on me, Steven." She gave him a broken smile, "even now I wanna run away, cause I can't fathom your warmth...I don't deserve you...but I'm afraid that I'll lose you."

"Silly Strawberry." Steven breathed, cupping her cheeks and resting his forehead on hers. "I searched for too long for you and gone through too much to just leave...My heart is yours, Connie."

Connie's fist started trembling as her face glowed in maroon, her heart pounding, and her black eyes seemed to dilate. Before looking down,00, "P-Please...Don't let me go...I really wanna go and hide right now...S-See hehehe...Weak. I'm so weak."

"You're far from weak. A weak person wouldn't take her life back from those who took it."

"Only because you provided a chance with the breaking of the shock collar and of Sara's jaw."

"Still took the chance." He argued. "Don't diminish your courage."

She didn't answer him at first. "I killed her...I threatened you with the same fate right after. How can you not be mad at me? How can you accept me? How can you love me?"

"You're Connie Maheswaran." He answered truthfully, "Not just in the physical way, the night I saved you. The defiant look on your face as I approached." Steven grinned gently, "That more than proves you and her are one and same. It's not hard to love you when I never stopped."

Connie remained silent at his words, but she was decidedly more heated than before as she leaned into his facial hold, holding his hands in her own. "Can you...Can you promise not to leave me alone?

She didn't expect him to answer her question the way he did.

Steven lips caressing hers in a gentle, tender, heartwarmingly familiar lip lock. The feeling

Of his suckling upon her top lip, mixed with the massage of his tongue onto and across her own, made her shiver and evoked moans of need towards him as she gripped his shirt, pulling him closer.

After a few moments, they broke their kiss, breathing a shared breath deeply as he placed his forehead on hers.

"You can't leave me." She pleaded, nuzzling against the bridge of his nose with her own.

Steven answered by pecking her once more, getting a trembling -squeak!- in return.

"I promise that I..."

-Koff!-

Connie could only watch in horror as Steven blood met her face from a wet cough.

Shocked tears ran from his brown eyes down as he took a step back before coughing up more blood. His back in a wet pain. His sight going hazy, watching her look at him with tears streaming down.

"I won't leave......"

Was the last thing he said before the light left his eyes. His last image was something pink joining her side.