-After Sirius had been killed-

Remus sat at home, head in his hands. The image of Sirius being hit with the killing curse played in a loop inside his head. He had looked strong on the outside after Sirius disappeared into the veil, but that was for Harry. Inside, he broke down, emotions spiraling out of control.

Holding an old photo of him and Sirius when they were kids, he wondered how long it would be until they saw each other again. A day, a week, several years? He didn't know. All he knew was that his love for Sirius would never die, but that with every passing day, it would grow stronger. The memories he would cherish forever, until the day he died. One memory he would always think about; the first time they kissed.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was a cold winter at Hogwarts when they were in their 3rd year. They had just cornered Snape and froze him. Laughing and grinning, they went to hide in their secret hiding place; the Shrieking Shack.

Shoulder to shoulder, they crawled through the secret passage way to The Shrieking Shack. They finally emerged, still grinning. They climbed up the old, rotten wooden stairs. They sat on the rotting and moldy bed on the top floor.

"That was brilliant Padfoot. Hitting him from the back." He had said.

"You weren't too bad yourself Moony. I can't believe he fell for that fake love note" Sirius had said through his laughing fit.

Remus's face dropped.

"What love note?" He had asked.

"The one you sent to lure him to the courtyard, pretending to be Lily. The one from charms class." Sirius had said, his smile slowing diapering.

"I didn't send him any note. What did it say?" Remus replied.

"For many years I have liked you as a friend,

But now that time has come to an end,

I love you more than I can say,

I love you more with everyday,

My hearts yearns for you,

I need you,

I can't live without you,

Every time we are apart, it is a nightmare,

So this is the place I want to meet you were,

I will finally tell you what's been forever in my heart and on my mind,

Because with my lies you are almost blind,

Meet me at the courtyard after hours,

Then maybe we could go up to the forbidden towers,

With much love and pain L" Sirius said.

Remus stared at the floor. He knew he had to tell him. He was going to find out sooner or later.

"That note I sent wasn't for him. It was for someone else" Remus said quietly.

"What! Who?" Asked Sirius eagerly

"It was for ... uh ... you." Remus sighed.

Sirius face went blank. He stood up and paced. His thinking face was on, and it was a deep thought. Remus stood as well. He wasn't sure what to do now that his friend knew.

"Please-" Remus began before he was interrupted.

Sirius had stepped forward and placed his lips upon Remus's. Remus was stunned. For a few seconds he just stood there, wide eyed. But he then started to kiss Sirius back. It wasn't that long, but the emotion in the kiss said it all; Sirius was in love with Remus as well.

They broke away. Sirius was blushing, Remus was still shocked.

"You were saying." Sirius said with a smile.

"But ... wait ... you just ... I ... was ... what." Remus stammered.

"You said 'Please'."

"Don't tell James or Peter about what happened." Remus said.

"Which part, the note or ... that we kissed?" Sirius replied

"Both." Remus smiled.

Remus sat on the bed. The kiss was real, but it didn't feel like it. His head and emotions were all over the place. Sirius stood in front of him. Looking up, Remus saw the desire in his friend's eyes. Sirius leaned down and kissed Remus again. Wrapping his arms around Sirius's waist, Remus pulled his friend on top of his body. They lay on the bed, kissing passionately while in each other's arms. Sirius lifted his head.

"What does this mean now?" Remus asked.

'It means that we have a few new secrets to keep; us, what happened here, and the note Snape read which was actually for me." Sirius replied.

"I love you Padfoot."

"I love you to.......Moony"

Remus smiled at the thought of that night. James never knew, even in death he was still oblivious. Fresh tears streamed down Remus's face. He couldn't believe that the last thing he said to Padfoot was, 'I'll be right back'. He couldn't have said that he loved him, but that would have blown their secret.

He stared down longingly at the photo of Sirius. How he was going to get through each day without seeing him? He stood up, knees creaking from their lack of use. He walked in a trance to the back door. Opening it quietly, he stared up at the moon. Walking slowly, he dragged himself onto the shore of a nearby lake. He looked around at the starry sky and peacful woods. He broke down in tears. This was Sirius's favorite place whenever he visited. But he wasn't there to join him on a beautiful night. He was killed by his cousin. HIS OWN COUSIN!!!!

Remus sunk onto his knees. He raised his head and screamed at the moon clear night sky. He screamed, roared and wailed until he could no longer make a sound. He lay on his back staring at the stars through his blurry eyes. His face was wet and sticky from crying, his throat burned like fire,but he didn't care. Nothing mattered to him anymore. The one person he had truly ever loved was gone. He remembered something Sirius said to him one night as they lay, in each others arms.....

"You know Remus, I think we were made or each other. We are always together, if not physically, then mentally. I want you to know that wherever I am, you'll always be the person I think of."

He closed his eyes and sighed deeply. Lost in his memories of their great times spent together, he didn't realize that it had started raining heavily. He opened his eye. Remus gasped at how cold he had suddenly become. He leaped up and ran back to his house. Remus stripped down to his boxers as he ran, leaving his soaking clothes on the floor. He lay on his soft bed. His scarred, muscly body wet, his chest rising and falling fast. Many things were going through his mind, too many to analyze. His breathing slowed as he relaxed to the sound of the rain.

Sleep soon came, but it brought more memories of Sirius, which meant more tears of sorrow and regret...

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I hoped you liked it. Comment any fanfics you would like and I will write them. By the way, sorry for the terrible poem, I can't write good poems.....