Should I put this in my Life Stories book? Maybe. But I haven't updated that since 2019 so... Besides, this is mostly fandom related stuff.

So... 2020, right? Insanity. And while it may have had it's small ups and steep downs, it's not *all* awful.

I mean, sure, global pandemic, unfortunately needlessly violent protests, I lost my grandma, the world lost so many familiar faces practically from the get go, the world was basically brought to a halt. For real, the last movie I saw in theaters was Jojo frickin Rabbit, to my memory. We were supposed to get so much cool stuff, like Black Widow...

But it's a new year, and we'll get a whole bunch of new stuff. I would argue it will mean even more after the long wait we had to go through together. Like, WandaVision is coming in TWO WEEKS. I'm beyond stoked, and May will be here before we know it. We're not gonna be in this slump forever, I promise.

But while we wait for all of those awesome things that are just around the corner, maybe we should look back at the good of 2020.

More personal things, while losing my dear grandma practically as soon as the school year started sucked, she's at peace now, wherever she ended up. She wasn't herself and was suffering for years. Now she's with my late grandpa and her mom watching over me (and my insanity) and the rest of my family. I miss her, but I'm glad she's happy now.

I had to deal with relationship issues for the first time, breaking up with my first and only boyfriend in late February. It was hard, but necessary. After months, we're still bros. We rant about The Mandalorian a lot lmao.

Over the summer I usually do a theatre camp at an old art center in the downtown of my city. It was supposed to be Shrek, but we instead did this little cabaret of different shows and turned it into our own show. Everyone got a little emotional because my performance was the first actual theatre that place had seen in months. And holy Jesus's balls, it was fun. Not to mention, at the end of February, we still were fortunate enough to schedule our school's spring musical before shit hit the fan, and that was one of the best experiences I've had because I worked my way up from simply a background character to a small role because of how I had been performing previously.

Barely a week after the summer show, I got my wisdom teeth removed. I barely remember the day of because my surgeon had an emergency in a town about 45 minutes away that he had to deal with. I had my IV in for like, an hour and a half longer than the average person so I was drugged as hell. I slept a lot that day and it was probably my most relaxing week in a long ass time. I could eat in my room, I got a TV in there to watch Galavant (for the last time before it was taken off of Netflix ;-;) and The Avengers... Over and over and over again for like, a week straight which sparked some new things I'll get to in a little bit. (I had the TV in here for a few days after I fully recovered). I watched my first ever episode of Spongebob because I was never allowed to as a kid bc it annoyed the shit out of my parents. But I needed something mindless for that night because I was having a bad reaction to the pain meds. I binged the entire season of Cursed, and my awesome little brother spent time while I was gone in surgery to put pictures of Loki all over my room... Some of them are still up and that was in July.

And bros, while I absolutely abhor online school, I did awesome. I brag about it to this day, but I only missed one question on my Roman Empire test in History class. I'll never know that one question, but still... One question. Bros, I got 110% on my AP English final because of the work I do on this platform.

Admittedly, my 16th birthday was kind of... Meh because my birthday was like, the day the cases were the worst in my area during the first spike. It snowed, and we went on a zoom call with my dad's brother's families that we... Literally never see because they live across the country... And because there's a lot of issues on that side of the family, but that's not related. Though, it *is* kind of cool how everyone put the past aside for my birthday because all three brothers' families haven't spoken like that since like, my parents' wedding almost 20 years ago. Regardless, I'm hoping my 17th will be better.

I got my licence, and with it the freedom to belt showtunes in my car whenever I please (there were a few issues, but shhhh... We live and learn). Not to mention my car smells amazing because of the Febreeze AC pods we put in.

Ya girl realized her bisexuality and is hella proud of it. Come at me :)

We're trudging along to perform our "fall" play at school, and one of the best days was when I walked in and two dudes were literally performing the High Ground scene on the half built set. My one regret is that I didn't offer to be Padmé for a scene because I shamelessly have all of her second half dialogue memorized. Though, to this day, my department doesn't know that two days before the kickoff banquet was when my grandma died because I didn't wanna be the raincloud on everyone's reunions... I'm planning on bringing it up during our prayer circle that we do before each show since enough time has passed. We're scheduled to perform on Feb. 5th, so here's hoping.

And just in general, my whole family still remains healthy despite the fact that both my parents are essential workers that are constantly out and about or are around other people. I wish the same on y'all.

Now, more personal fandom related things, because that's why I posted this in my fandom book.

We may have been dry as far as Marvel content in 2020, but with the extra time came so much time to write in my Avengers book, my pride and joy on this profile. 48 new chapters, not including the chapters based on the MCU movies because those are clumped together and I couldn't even begin to tell you what year I wrote half of those because I edit them so much. Guys, that's like, 2/3 of that book I wrote in 2020. And I'm gonna continue to write in that book because it's just fun. Even if only one or two people read it, it's worth it because at the end of the day, as long as I enjoy it, it's something I love to do.

Going deeper into it, I got to explore so many different tropes and realities in that book, thereby leading me to grow as a writer. I wrote AUs based on some of my favorite movies, musicals, and shows that made me appreciate the original material even more (and may have damaged my ability to perceive the characters properly, but that's what happens). It helped to bring me out of my post TROS slump and realize that while the Sequels are good, Revenge of the Sith will always be my favorite. Reylo is my OTP, but Anidala is my like, support ship. Reylo is good but my god, is it emotionally draining.

That was a digression. My point is that my four part Star Wars AU in my Avengers book is one of my proudest things because of all the characters and how it's twice as long as my usual AUs. It was sad, but I really just wanted an excuse to listen to Across the Stars with more purpose.

My writing also gave me a larger appreciation for the Multiverse, which considering the premise of the Loki series, is a good thing to appreciate. I enjoy the flexibility of writing different stories with the same characters. I am the master of my own little quadrant of the Multiverse and I enjoy it.

2020 also blessed me in the form of discovering probably my favorite of my Multiverses. Remember how I said I watched The Avengers for a week straight while recovering from my surgery? After watching it so many times, I started to imagine... Alternate scenarios. Now, granted, I had the groundwork months before when I wrote my "Alternate Avengers" chapter in mid February. But watching The Avengers so much made me think deeper into what the "after" would look like.

Thus, Multiverse 412 was born.

Well, maybe not "born." My philosophy with the Multiverse is that since it's infinite, every reality you write or imagine does exist somewhere. So you didn't necessarily "create" that Multiverse, you "discovered" it. Sort of like discovering evidence of an ancient civilization. It existed without you, but since you "discovered" it, you're credited with it's discovery and can make your own interpretations of how it works and operates. So that one X Reader you wrote a while back? That's a Multiverse you discovered.

It's also a nice way of thinking about it because it means no one Marvel media is strictly "canon." If you don't like something that happened in "canon," then you can imagine a world where that didn't happen, and it's your canonical Multiverse. So, if you don't like something that happens in let's say, the Loki series, there's a universe where that something didn't happen. That's just the Multiverse story that Marvel chose to tell.

That was a digression, my bad.

Anyways, my 412 Multiverse is like, my baby. It's a Multiverse where really bad shit happens, but it's such an interesting story to tell. It's allowed me to do so much worldbuilding. Not to mention, it allows me the chance to explore the darker side of Olivia, my OC. It shows that everyone is equally capable of great good and great evil. Granted, there's some freaky shit going on behind the scenes that even she's not totally aware of, or at least doesn't fully understand.

I could go on for hours about the creative process and even the most minute of details about 412, but that's for a later chapter dedicated strictly to it. But it did have impacts on my outside life, too. I often joke with my friends that "2020 would suck less if Loki had just taken over in 2012." My dad, on the other hand, he often says that "I, for one, would accept our new alien overlords were an invasion to occur in 2020." It's a completely unrelated alien invasion that he thinks of, but I often agree with him for different reasons. If he's ever suspicious of how detailed I get with imagining our extraterrestrially oppressed lives, he doesn't show it.

Secondly, remember that 110% on my English final? The assignment I chose (there were several options) was to write an alternate ending for Dracula, the book we had been reading and analyzing for months. I decided to change the ending to see what would happen if Mina had become a vampire and fought against Jonathan. I even had to cut down my ending because I wrote too much for my teacher. But I was able to accurately describe a previously good character "turning to the dark side" because I had been writing and conceptualizing 412 for four months prior to that.

(Psst, if y'all ever wanna read my unedited "Stephen King" cut of my alternate ending, let me know! I call it that because Stephen King was known to write way too much that he had to pare down)

Anyways, point is, 2020 was a GREAT year for me when it came to my Avengers writing. I wish you all good wishes for writing in 2021.

I also joined some new fandoms in 2020!

After years of wriggling around it (Idk why, I tried it and never went back to it years ago before Netflix), I finally watched Avatar: The Last Airbender. Holy shit, I had heard good things, but my god is it amazing. The story is amazing, the characters are well written, and it's just visually stunning. Zuko's redemption arc is what Ben Solo's arc should have been. I do think Season 3 is my favorite overall.

If I had to pick a top 3 episodes, I'd have to go with:

3) The Beach

2) Sozin's Comet

1) The Ember Island Players

Honorable mention goes to "Zuko Alone" because I'm an absolute sucker for backstory episodes, especially backstory episodes dealing with harsh pasts.

Ember Island Players is just *peak* comedy and was a great penultimate episode to the series. It seems like if there was a full script, it would be a fun high school show.

Sozin's Comet is the series finale and has some of my favorite moments in the series like the very end when the war is over and Zuko and Azula's Agni Kai. It also provided some great writing inspiration.

The Beach? Again, hilarious. It's a compilation of some of my favorite characters just trying to be normal kids for once, and it ends hilariously.

As far as characters, here are my top 3:

3) Uncle Iroh

2) Zuko

1) Azula

Honorable Mentions go to Katara and Mai. And my god is it hard to pick favorites because all the characters are just SO GOOD. Though I guess there's a Fire Nation trend...

Uncle Iroh I don't think I need to explain.

Zuko, again, pretty self explanatory. I am an absolute sucker for tragic, dark haired characters, and his redemption is well earned and just *chef's kiss* perfection.

Azula is like, my girl. Again, the tragic character thing, but a) my squad tends to associate me with her so much that in our group chat where we are called by our Avatar Character likenesses as decided by our peers, I'm Azula, and it was a very unanimous and very quick deduction. B) she's a GREAT character study, and is a great writing inspiration. And C) my bi ass. That's it.

Galavant still reigns as my favorite TV series ever, but ATLA is like, #2.

Now, the other major fandom I joined is a relatively small one, but a fandom nonetheless.

Y'all ever just watch a movie and just get that gut feeling like, "This one... This is my favorite movie. It's just *perfect* and any flaws it has are so small or so easy to overlook that it adds to the experience."

That was me in mid June while watching the cinematic MASTERPIECE that is Crimson Peak.

Y'all, I don't know where to even BEGIN with this movie. It's one of those movies that you might like, watch when you can't find anything else because it's not *super* well known. Which is unfortunate and that's mostly because the marketing betrayed it and people got mad that they didn't "get the movie they paid for." It was advertized as your run of the mill horror movie when it's closer to a Gothic Romantic Tragedy... That just happens to have ghosts in it. And even then, the ghosts aren't the real horror of the movie, the psychotic SISTER is.

Again, I could talk for hours about all the nuances and details of this movie, but we don't have time. It's witty, it's beautiful, it made me cry. The characters are just SO well written. They're not bland and linear, they have motivations, they have goals, they have emotions. And Edith, the main character, is interesting because she doesn't have a character arc that is integral to the story. Her biggest arc is learning that it's okay to love and she adds to a major theme of letting go of the past. She learns that by the first act of the movie.

But protagonists don't always have to undergo a change in their stories, they can also be a force for change in others. Edith wasn't the one who needed the arc, Thomas did. He needed to learn the same things, just to a far more severe degree. What Lucille was telling him was love wasn't love. It was toxic and manipulative protectiveness that she misconstrued as love. Letting go of the past for Thomas meant a lot of the same things as learning to love. It's okay to love someone else and leave behind the things that are a negative influence. Butterflies, lights, darkness, and moths are major symbols and themes in the movie.

Edith is both butterfly and light. Lucille is both moth and darkness. Thomas is the balance of both. Thomas needs Edith's light to draw him out of Lucille's darkness so that he can change or metamorphasize from a moth to a butterfly. Again, I could talk for a while about thematic details and nuances in this movie, and I might because it's just so well written. The novelization also touches onto these themes in a more literary degree and is an absolutely fantastic read. It personifies the *house*, another metaphor for the past, it gets into other unseen concepts like Edith and Thomas' quaint little wedding, and it deadass calls Lucille a spawn of Satan.

I don't agree with the very ending though because it forces Edith and Alan together not even an hour after Thomas dies. Why can't they just remain friends?? I'm all for a childhood friends to lovers trope, it's what my Avengers writing is built off of, but it's not an end all be all trope. Again, I could go on.

Point is, 2020 gave me this amazing movie to watch and adore. Go watch it, it is so much more than it's rated. It's got action, feminist undertones that aren't all preachy or in your face, a riveting plot with sympathetic antagonists, and a *really great ass.*

Lol I watched this movie with Shipsrlife2 before she moved away and we had a BLAST. So many butt and Alabama jokes... She also watched It with me, which led me to ask for and get the book for Christmas and also a bunch of Beverly and Poison jokes (cos Jessica Chastain, who by the way KILLS it in Crimson Peak, both literally and figuratively.)

If y'all want an even more in depth analysis, check out this video I found, it's FANTASTIC:

Anyways, my overall point of this chapter was to highlight the fact that for every bad 2020 had, it had it's good moments. I wish you all the best for 2021, and I *know* it's going to be better. We'll be fine, we will get out of this and come out better than ever.

Happy New Year!!!