Charlie Mortdecai x reader X Jack Sparrow

They say getting children to carve a pumpkin is no easy task,but what if I told you there is something much harder to do. I am attempting to teach two grown men how to carve a pumpkin,yes that does sound fairly easy but what if I tell you that the men are more like grown children instead. Then the task at hand becomes a lot harder. For you see Charlie Mortdecai and Captain Jack Sparrow are not the easiest guys to work with,but I love them both so I will work with them.

If I can just get the two of them too focus at the task at hand,then I think we will be onto something. What I should have expected when I had left the room to answer the phone,was for chaos to descend in the kitchen
"What's going on here?" I say as walk back into the kitchen to see Jack trying to hack at his pumpkin with his sword and Charlie is trying to cut a moustache into his
"I couldn't do anything with that tiny blade,so I'm using me own love" Jack explained slicing his pumpkin in half"Oops"

"That's why I gave you the small blade Jack,so that wouldn't happen" I told him, removing the in half pumpkin and replacing it with a new whole one. Whilst I had been dealing with Jack, Charlie had raided the fridge for a drink
"Excuse you Charlie I said no alcohol until after the pumpkin has been carved,I don't think I fully trust you to use a blade under the influence "I tell him
"Have no fear my dear Y/n,for all Mortdecai are experts with blades of any size " Charlie said confident
"Is that so" Jack said" Think you can handle a sword better than a pirate?"

"I used to fence at school,so yes I am better than some common pirate" Charlie said,Jack looked at him shocked
"Before either of you try to cut eachother in half,may I remind you both have pumpkins to carve first " I tell the two men
"But love this is much more important " Jack said to me
"For you maybe but the two of you did promise to do this with me,and leave your petty problems until afterwards " I remind them
"Fair enough my good lady " Charlie said" We shall complete this task,and then I shall best you at swords"

"Ha your own" Jack said, thankfully after that the two of them got to work on the pumpkins and there was no more argument's between them, although after they where done the two of them went outside to see who indeed is better with a sword,I stayed inside for that bit. Knowing the outcome already,ten minutes later the two men came back inside
"Finished already?" I ask them
"He cheated" Charlie said pointing to Jack
"Pirate."