Chapter 27

Han Jisung

"Hyung!" Jeongin greeted me, surprisingly before I can even enter inside the dance studio. I smiled at him.

"You're back! How was the gig?" My smile disappeared when I remembered what happened earlier.

"It was great. Where's Minho hyung?" I tried plastering a fake smile on my face. Chan gestured inside before pointing at Minho who was sleeping.

"He's been sulking ever since Woojin and I went here. He even threw his hoodie. Here." My heart ached when he gave me the hoodie that I gave as a gift to Minho earlier this day.

"T-thank you, hyung." I stuttered. I slowly walked towards where Minho is. I dropped my bag on the ground before sitting down.

"I'm sorry, hyung..." My eyes got teary as I continue looking at him. I was startled when his eyes started opening.

My tear flowed when he looked at me with no joy in his eyes, not like every time he looks at me. He stood up, not pulling his mask down.

He looks at me with disgusted eyes. Everything connected like puzzle pieces.

He stood up and left, not saying any word. I felt my world started to fall. More tears flowed out of my eyes as I look down at my hands.

Not you too, Minho.

I can't lose you too.

———

It's been a few days and Minho still doesn't talk to me. The others are starting to get worried and concerned about what happened between us too.

Felix always wanted to talk things over but I can't manage to speak when he asks me. My mind went blank and all I can remember is Minho's eyes whenever he sees me.

My mood goes down these past days. The group was so quiet since both Minho and I are not talking to each other and not even hanging out with the others. My mental health started to go down too.

I've been attending the hospital secretly. No one knows. Only our manager knows and I pleaded him to not tell the others.

My depression came back. This time, a lot worse. I kept pulling myself away from things that can trigger my depression, make me go off, and start hurting myself.

I sighed. I wrapped my towel on the lower half of my body before going out of the bathroom. The younger ones hanged out with each other so I was left alone in the room.

———

Lee Minho

It's been a while...

I can feel Jisung's breakdown. We're the same.

I shake my head before walking to my room. I walked past Jisung's room. His door was opened so I can't help myself but look inside.

I saw him looking at his self in the mirror, crying. My eyes went to his bareback and there I saw multiple bruises. My eyes widened at the sight.

My eyes then went back to his reflection in the mirror. He was holding a blade in line with his wrist. I panicked and before I even knew what I'm doing, I burst inside.

"Jisung, stop!" I grabbed the blade he was holding. He looked at me with despair in his eyes.

He looks so broken...

My heart broke at the sight of my boyfriend. That's when I realized everything I've been doing. I've been so harsh at him.

"H-hyung... W-what are you d-doing here..." He said in between his loud sobs.

My mind went back to the sight of his beaten back. I could only see red when I remembered what I saw.

"Who did that?" I tried my hardest to calm down.

"If-fell down a-at the stairs y-yesterday." He put his shirt on in a rush. It feels suspicious but I didn't mind it for now. He sat down at his bed.

He's still crying so bad. I couldn't help but feel guilty. I should've been here comforting him but why did I even put him in so much pain?!

"Jisungie... Tell me what's wrong..." I sat beside him. I rubbed his back, only for him to hiss when I accidentally pressed hard on his bruise.

"I'm sorry!" I quickly apologized. He just shook his head while his sobs became loud.

"Hyung... I m-missed you..." He pulled me in a tight hug. He cried so much in my chest that I almost feel my shirt soaking with his tears.

"Don't worry. I won't ignore you again. Now tell me what's wrong." Someone's been hurting him aside from me. Physically and mentally. I can feel it.

He cries harder. He was sobbing uncontrollably. His body started shaking. I panicked at the feeling of him shaking in my arms.

"Jisung, calm down! Hyung is here. Breathe!" I tried my hardest to calm him down.

I whispered calming words at his ear, starting to feel tears in my eyes. I couldn't help but cry too. He's been in so much pain that he can't take it anymore and I've been putting him down too.

I hugged him tight when he stopped shaking. We just stayed like that for what feels like an eternity before I heard his soft snores.

I slowly pulled away before carefully lifting him. I lay him down on his bed. I sat down beside him, brushing his cheek while wiping his tears with my thumb.

What I saw today is too much. He never cried that much. He never attempted suiciding after he joined Stray Kids. He was always happy. He always smiles.

I never knew he was going through so much. I've been a very useless boyfriend. I even added more pain by ignoring him.

"I love you, Jisung..." I whispered before wiping my tears that started to race down my face.

"I'm sorry, hyung..." He mumbled in his sleep. A tear slipped out of his closed eyes. I leaned in before kissing the tear away.

"You're forgiven, baby..." I muttered with my broken voice. I can't help but cry while looking at my boyfriend's face.

Please tell me what's wrong.

———

"You saw the rumors, didn't you." Jisung sarcastically laughed while tears form in his eyes.

"I didn't expect you to believe that especially you know Taegwang more than how I know him." He scoffed as he learned back the headboard of his bed.

"Jisung, I became careless, okay? Jealousy ate me." I sighed. I didn't know talking to him was this hard.

"I was given a gig by the company. The gig, however, wasn't premiered on the national tv since my rumors popped out." He shrugged, disappointment

"I did go to Taegwang in a restaurant. But not for what those rumors said." He sadly smiles at me.

"He just dragged me there to threatened me. He knew how fragile my state is. He toyed with my condition. He made my depression came back. Then I just realized the other reason he pulled me there is to make that rumors spread and break me." His tears flowed out.

I immediately pulled him in a hug. I can't help but silently cry out of frustration. I'm frustrated because I should've protected him instead of hurting him. I'm frustrated because I should've comforted him instead of ignoring him.

"I'm sorry, Jisung... I'm such a useless boyfriend!" I buried my face in his neck.

"No, you're not and that's why I love you..."