Dante:*looks at the picture of Eva*

Dominic: Staring at it won't bring her back.

Dante: Whatever. I keep it for the memories.

Dominic: Like what?

Dante: Remember that time mom punished dad for something he did like..a long time ago before they hooked up?

Dominic: Oh yeah. I wonder what it was.

Dante: Probably she heard a Schnee was being born.

Dominic: Heh, how much of a mind fuck would it be if we were related to them?

Dante: Hey we could easily pass as a Schnee. We just got more sunlight than them.

Dominic: And our family isn't in complete shambles.

Dante: Yeah yeah...hey remember when she came down from heaven when you and Lady were dating?

Dominic: God don't remind me.

Dante: She was so happy that you two were together. Then you two broke up and she thought you cheated on Lady and beat you with a spoon.

Dominic: Yeah that's a beating I'll never forget.

Dante: Hah. So how's the pussy slaying going?

Dominic: Eugh don't call it that.

Dante: Well what else would you call it?? You've about slept with every girl in highschool. Me and the guys even made up the term "Judgment Nut".

Dominic: Judgment what?

Dante: Well we thought that you just use judgment cut but...with your nut. Your load. Your splooge.

Dominic: Oh! No! God no. Where's the fun in that?

Dante: Yeah I agree. Hey, honest to God question. If you could get back with Lady would you do it?

Dominic:*exhales* Wow....uh...I had a good time with Mary. Shit I remember waking up after you took me off of Malet island and there she was. So...uh...if I could then yeah. Who knows? Maybe things would be different.

Dante: How sweet~

Dominic: Oh be quiet you catgirl lover.

Dante: Hey I'm not the one who keeps on getting memes and fanart of him made!

Dominic: It just means I'm more popular than you..

Dante: Yeah well take your popularity in private cause I was on the internet the other day and someone leaked a photo of you and Lady tounging each other down.

Dante pulls out a photocopied image and throws it to Dominic's side of the room

Dominic:*squint* I don't remember this...

Dante: Well you have your black coat on so it happened recently. You dog.

Dominic: Just don't show it to Mary or else she's gonna blow my ass kingdom come.

Dante: Ssssss...!

Dominic: You didn't....

Dante: I..kind of sent it to a group chat of everyone we know...

Dominic: You..monster..!

Dante: Good luck with the messages and Lady probably hunting your ass like a game animal.

The sound of a motorcycle screeching to a halt outside and then the sound of a gun being cocked is heard as well which signals Dominic to GTFO and run upstairs and barracade himself in his room

Lady:*kicks down the front door*

Dante: Hey it's lover girl!

Lady:*shoots Dante in the head* Ass..

Lady stomps up the stairs and grabs the door handle of Dominic's bedroom door and she flings it open

Dominic: Oh fuck my door opens from the other way!

Dante:*wiping the blood from his forehead* Damn that stings..!

Lady drops all of her weapons save for a knife she pulls out and walks towards Dominic with menacingly as he hides under his bedsheets

Lady: I..am going to paint your walls..red..

Dante: Heh, bet she got hers painted white when they were together.*chuckles* Ah I kill myself sometimes.

Dante grabs his coffee mug and takes a sip of it as the sound of Dominic screaming and Lady grunting and slicing was heard from upstairs. The owner of Devil May Cry puts on some headphones and nods his head to his music