-:-:-

Cause what about, what about, what about angels?

"It's not about, not about, not about angels."

-Not about angels, Birdy

------------------------------------------------

It was my first day of therapy, I didn't really want too come but my family, the lads, and Eleanor wanted me too. And yes, I said Eleanor, she may have passed on but I still feel her presence with me, stoping me from making rash decisions like she had. I arrived at door 76, Dr Mason, the sign said., I opened it checking my watch, 11:28, the session started at 11:30. I examined the room there were two chairs, two side tables, and a lamp in one corner, depressing if you ask me. At 11:30 Dr. Mason came in, he was a balding man, around the age of 50. 

"Hello, Mr. Tomlinsom, I'm doctor Mason."

"It's Louis." I replied shaking his hand. "So, you want me too express my feelings or something?" I said, feeling rather silly. 

"Well, I suppose. Have a seat in the chair." He pointed to the chair opposite of his, it was fairly comfortable which was good, because I was expecting an uncomfortable hospital chair, or worse one of those couch things you see one T.V shows or movies. 

"So, what have you felt today?"

"Tired, hungry, and hungry again." I said smiling.

"This is serious Mr. Tomlinson." He said annoyed.

"Oh, sorry, I guess a bit sad?" I said more as a question then an answer.

"And why were you sad?"

"I don't really know." I replied shrugging.

"Could it be because of you diseased, friend?"

"Girlfriend, and I don't believe so."

"And why not?"

"Well, I guess because you can't miss someone if you still feel their presence."

"So, you still feel her presence?" He said is if it was the most interesting thing, and jotting something down on his clipboard I just realized he was holding.

"Yes, I mean, I have tried to end my own life or at least thought about it, and something always stops me, and sometimes I can picture her with me."

"Do you picture like a ghost, or?"

"Not a ghost, but possibly an angel." I said, it finally dawning on me, maybe she was some sort of guardian angel that I had heard about in Sunday school.

"You do know, Mr. Tomlinson, that is easy for someone as close to the diseased, as yourself can start having hallucinations of them."

"They're not hallucinations." I said firmly. Who was he to come and try and tell me that my connection too Eleanor was a halluctionation. 

"Okay then, well, Mr. Tomlinson, have you been seeing her a lot?"

"No, not really, but she is not a hallucination."

"Mr. Tomlinson, we don't know if their hallucinations of, what was her name?"

"Eleanor, Eleanor Jane Calder." I said smiling.

"Okay, well we don't know if you hallucinating Miss Calder."

"I think I know if they're not hallucinations." I said becoming annoyed with him.

"Now, listen too me-." I cut him off.

"They are not hallucinations." I said gruffly standing up. "She is not a trick my mind is playing on me, she may not fully be here anymore, but I think I would know if I was crazy or not. If you want a scientific term for what's happening then I give you this, an angel, that's what she is, my guardian angel." With that I walked out of the office slamming the door behind me. Doctor Mason was lucky I hadn't started throwing the few things he had in his officein his office around like I had done in my flat the first few weeks she had left. 

After my session with Doctor Mason, I got a new therapist and Eleanor didn't leave. 

-------

[MoaningLouis author's note] 

these one shots are killing me omg