Dean and Castiel are in the middle of a very heated debate over Spuffy versus Bangel when someone rings the doorbell a bunch of times. Samandriel gets the door so they don't have to get up, and instantly, Charlie bursts into view.

"Where's Castiel? Oh, thank god," she breathes. "I keep hearing people say you're dead and I was starting to freak out."

Castiel just laughs. "People are taking this social media thing way too far. I'm not dead, just hacked."

"You have no idea how much of a relief this is," she tells him. "Plus, I finally get to see Dean again, so life's pretty good right now."

"Oh, so you can see me," Dean says in a jokingly accusing way. "You were just ignoring me. Great. I see how it is."

"Well, next time there are rumors going around that Castiel is dead, I'll make sure to say hi to you first," Charlie says sarcastically. "Oh, and congrats on the Super Bowl."

"Thanks," he replies. "I mean, you're three months late, but thanks anyway."

"Would it make you feel better if I congratulated you on everything I've missed?" Charlie asks jokingly.

"Yeah, I think it would."

Charlie shakes her head at him in amusement. "Well, from most recent backwards, congrats on winning Castiel back, and congrats on your second Super Bowl, and congrats on winning Castiel back the first time, and congrats on winning your first Super Bowl, and congrats on your first Patriots win and congrats on being on the team in general, and congrats on graduating college and congrats on your first college football win. Was that good? Did I miss anything?"

"Well, there was my first Patriots game," Dean tells her.

"I said that one!" she protests.

"No, you said my first win. I didn't win my first game."

"Whatever. Technicalities."

"How long has it been since you two saw each other?" Castiel asks, because that went back a long time.

They share a look, trying to determine how long it was.

"Five years ago?" Charlie guesses.

"Maybe six?" Dean estimates.

"Unless you count the reunion last year, but we didn't really talk," she adds.

Looking back at Castiel, Dean adds, "You think we were apart long? I lost touch with everyone from high school months earlier."

"Even Sam and Gabriel?" Charlie asks.

"Well, not Sam because he's my brother, but I don't even think I still have Gabriel's number."

"Wow, Dean. That's low," Castiel replies with a joking smile.

"Something tells me Gabriel doesn't care," Dean replies. "But back to the more important matter at hand. You're apparently dead now?"

Castiel chuckles. "Yeah, people think I killed myself and that's why my social media accounts disappeared."

"Shouldn't you, like, make sure people know you're not dead?"

Castiel shrugs. "Nah. I'm good."

As if Chuck is trying to convince him otherwise, he gets a text from Gabriel at that moment.

Gabriel: Hey, Castiel. You free?

Castiel chuckles. "Gabriel found out."

Dean looks over his shoulder at the message. "Wouldn't he be asking if you're alive, not just free?"

"No, he's learned not to trust the rumors, so he wouldn't outright say it," Castiel explains. "But sometimes the rumors are true, so obviously he's going to check."

"Can I answer?" Dean asks, taking the phone without waiting for permission. Castiel waits impatiently for him to hand it back, which takes a few minutes, until he can read the conversation himself. Charlie crawls on the top of the couch and reads it over his shoulder.

Gabriel: Hey, Castiel. You free?

Castiel: I've got to tell you something, but you can't tell anyone else. Promise?

Gabriel: Obviously. You're my little bro. I got you. What's up?

Castiel: This isn't Castiel. It's Lucifer.

Castiel looks over at Dean with an amused smile on his face. "Throwing him under the bus, I see?"

Dean shrugs. "It's payback for all the times I've had to listen to the Bee Movie."

Castiel laughs to himself and continues reading.

Gabriel: ... Okay? I mean, it's far from the first time you've stolen his phone. Not sure why you want me to keep it a secret.

Castiel: No, that's not it. I don't really know how to say it, but... Cas is dead.

Castiel gapes at him. "Dean! You can't just go around telling people I'm dead!" he yells.

Dean bursts out laughing. "No, keep going. It gets better."

Gabriel: WHAT?!

Castiel: Yeah, he died last night. Idk if you've noticed, but we got rid of his social media as a sign of respect. I don't want people being assholes to him, especially not now. He deserves better.

Gabriel: But what happened?

Castiel: He killed himself.

Gabriel: Why? Do you know? Was there at least a note this time?

Castiel can't help but laugh. Seeing Dean's questioning look, he clarifies, "'Was there at least a note this time?' Like this is just something I do a lot. I don't know why, I just find that hilarious."

"My god, you're a freak," Dean jokes.

Castiel: Yeah, but I don't know if you really want to know what he wrote.

Gabriel: Are you fucking with me? Of course I want to know!

Castiel: All he said was, 'Don't give Gabriel my dog. He'll kill the damn thing.'

Castiel bursts out laughing at that. "Dean! Oh my god, why? Why are you like this?"

"Ah, you love it," he replies with a grin.

"Yeah, I do," he agrees, giving him a quick kiss before returning to the conversation.

Gabriel: DAMMIT DEAN THAT ISN'T FUNNY!

Castiel: It totally was tbh

Gabriel: MY GOD YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE

Castiel: That was awesome! Dude I totally had you going for a while there.

Gabriel: I THOUGHT MY BROTHER WAS DEAD HOW IS THAT FUNNY?

Castiel: *shrugs* it's funny from here

Castiel: Are you just ignoring me now?

Castiel: Great, thanks. Nice talking to you, too.

Castiel decides he should probably text Gabriel an apology, but instead, he asks a question Dean probably should have asked.

Castiel: How'd you know it was Dean?

Castiel: And this is actually Castiel this time, I swear.

Gabriel: Your boyfriend is an asshole and you have to go dump him now.

Castiel: Yeah yeah. How'd you know it was him?

Gabriel: He called you Cas. I figured it out when I realized you weren't dead.

Gabriel: AND NEVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN OKAY I WAS FREAKING OUT

Castiel: Hey, it's not my fault he took my phone.

Gabriel: Well what's up with your Twitter and insta and everything?

Castiel: Hacked & deleted. I figure I'll just leave everyone to wonder about the mysterious disappearance of Castiel Novak for a while, just to see what they make of it.

Gabriel: You better be telling all your friends tho because I just had a panic attack

Castiel: I'm beginning to think that's a good idea. Charlie came over to check on me too.

"Tell him I say hi!" Charlie says, still looking at the phone.

"Will do."

Gabriel: I don't blame her. I would've too if I didn't live halfway across the country.

Castiel: Charlie says hi

Gabriel: Gabriel says hi back.

"Hey, Cas." Dean hands him his own phone, which he takes questioningly. He was apparently texting someone named "King Moose." Seeing his confused expression, he clarifies, "It's Sam. Old joke."

Sam: I think Gabriel is plotting your murder

Dean: Did he tell you what happened?

Sam: Obviously. I'm sitting right next to him. He needed someone to vent to.

Dean: Wasn't is awesome?

Sam: NO!

Sam: Well, okay, maybe a little.

Sam: Wait brb

Dean: Okay?

Sam: I can't tell if he's laughing or crying rn

Sam: Wait

Sam: He's laughing. You're in the clear.

Dean: Thank god. I almost felt kinda sorta a little guiltyish

Sam: Wow, you're so nice.

Dean: I know :)

Sam: Wait

Dean: Again?! Gawd Sammy

Sam: He's planning your murder

Sam: He's gonna make it look like an accident

Sam: So idek anymore

Dean: Oh god. I dun goofed, didn't I?

Sam: Big time.

Dean: Well fuck me.

Handing the phone back, all Castiel says is, "I'll take you up on that offer if you want."

Dean chuckles and gives him a kiss on the cheek. "Tempting, Cas. Really tempting."

And thus, Charlie died on fangirling.