Chapter 177

The reactions for that interview are mixed, but overall, it's more positive than he expected. A lot of Twitter users are upset that he said his favorite app was Instagram, but Dean refuses to skip that question because he knew the answer and wanted to up his win-lose ratio. Otherwise, Twitter is fairly positive.

"OH MY GAWD THEY'RE SO PRECIOUS!"

"I know I'm the number one anti-Dean person but this was kinda cute."

"Everyone: Dean sucks! Dean: *appears* Everyone: YASSS QUEEN SLAY WE LOVE YOU!!!"

"That entire thing was just Castiel talking to Dean like wtf no that's not what I signed up for."

"If this is what a normal conversation between Castiel and Dean sounds like, they need to do this more often."

"Dean threw so much shade at the other pop stars and I am LIVING."

"Dean just seems kinda rude. Like those questions were annoying. Why couldn't he just shut up and play the game?"

"'They're going to think I have a soul' why am I Dean tho?"

"THAT DATE SOUNDS SO CUTE THO LIKE WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT IT WAS DEAN THAT WOULD DECIDE HEY, LETS GO WATCH THE SUNSET?"

"So much shade was thrown at Lucifer today and idk if they're joking or if they're just acting like they're joking but some shit actually did go down."

"I had literally heard the entire album by 1:00 this morning wtf Dean talk about not being supportive."

"LUCIFER TEXTS DEAN COUNTRY SONGS THIS IS ADORABLE!"

"Tell me this wasn't the cutest interview in Castiel history, I fucking dare you."

"He seemed so much more chill today than usual wyd Castiel why you like that?"

"I'm living for the fact that Lucifer's contact for Dean is Bullwinkle."

"Is it bad that I don't actually remember any of Castiel's answers and just remember the back-and-forth because that was the cute part."

"Dean thinks Castiel likes Kansas more than Bon Jovi and I want to smack him with a pan."

"I'm loving Dean and Lucifer's friendship. Dean has a 100% approval rating from me just for that."

"Idk who this Ketch guy is but I hate him. Only we get to call Castiel a princess."

"Defensive Castiel is my fav like yee boi you go stand up for your siblings."

"They never mentioned Charlie but they mentioned high school and now I'm wondering if Dean doesn't like Charlie."

"I can just see Lucifer texting Dean the link to a country song with no context whatsoever."

"Are we just going to ignore how Dean doesn't know how many albums Castiel has?"

"Castiel saying he wanted to talk to his dad more than anyone else made me cry ngl."

"Dean writing sh*t instead of just not swearing is such a mood."

"JUST GET MARRIED ALREADY GOD DAMMIT!"

"I bet their relationship is staged just cuz we kept telling him to get a bf. Castiel doesn't watch football and Dean knows nothing about Castiel's music and it seems wrong."

"The album is great obvi but it gets better every time so imagine how much better a normal album would've been if Dean hadn't been around."

"What happened to Dean's dad? 'I've been there too a few times' gave me waaaay too many feels."

"The only way to make that better would be to get rid of Dean and redo that entire interview without him."

"It's nice that Jody was so chill about Castiel and Dean basically ignoring her on her own show."

"Petition for Castiel and Dean to start their own reality tv show."

"Is it bad that I totally forgot Dean played football until he said that he just throws a football around? I always forget he exists outside the Casdom."

"As the number one Lucifer stan, the number of times they mentioned him made me so freaking happy."

Speaking of Lucifer, Castiel should probably see what's up with his guinea pig so this entire chapter isn't just tweets because this is getting boring. He checks his messages, finding a picture of a fat Guinea pig with large patches of orange, black, and white fur along his back sitting on Lucifer's shoulder. The only message he sent was, "I'm a real pirate now."

Castiel chuckles. Of course Lucifer would someone equate his rodent to a bird.

Castiel: I want to ask its name but I'm scared to know what you named it.

Lucifer: Ok but do you want me to tell you his name or are you content living in ignorance?

Castiel: I'm gonna regret this but what's his name?

Lucifer: So

Lucifer: My first thought

Lucifer: Was Peggy

Lucifer: But Mikey said no

Lucifer: Cuz he said it's a girl name

Lucifer: And people would wrongly assume he's a girl.

Lucifer: Even though Peggy is short for Pegasus

Lucifer: Obviously

Lucifer: And Pegasus is gender neutral

Lucifer: But whatever

Lucifer: So

Lucifer: Instead

Lucifer: I named him

Lucifer: *drum roll*

Lucifer: *awesome drum solo*

Lucifer: *breaks drums*

Lucifer: Mark.

Lucifer: His name is Mark.

Castiel just stares at his phone for a minute. After all that, he just named his guinea pig Mark?

Castiel: For real?

Lucifer: Yep. It's my bby Mark. He's really precious. He keeps squeaking at me.

Castiel: Is there a reason you have a guinea pig?

Lucifer: Well

Lucifer: I was making a video

Lucifer: And my tripod squeaked

Lucifer: And I thought it was a ghost

Lucifer: But then I thought

Lucifer: What if the ghost didn't mess with the tripod to make it squeak

Lucifer: And actually squeaked itself

Lucifer: So my first thought was a mouse

Lucifer: A ghost mouse

Lucifer: But then I thought about it

Lucifer: And mice have such a bad reputation

Lucifer: So then I wondered

Lucifer: What did the mice do wrong?

Lucifer: They're just rodents trying to live their rodent lives.

Lucifer: And then I wondered

Lucifer: What makes a mouse different than a guinea pig?

Lucifer: They're both rodents

Lucifer: So I decided to google it

Lucifer: Until I realized

Lucifer: There really isn't anything to google for that

Lucifer: So

Lucifer: I just googled guinea pigs

Lucifer: And I somehow found an animal shelter site

Lucifer: And they had a really cute guinea pig

Lucifer: But his name was Michael and I wasn't going to get a Guinea pig with the same name as my brother

Lucifer: But he was really cute

Lucifer: And I miss Misha

Lucifer: So I went to the animal shelter

Lucifer: And I bought him

Lucifer: And changed the name to Peggy

Lucifer: And then Michael saw my guinea pig

Lucifer: And he didn't like it

Lucifer: But Claire and Samandriel liked my guinea pig, so we outnumbered Michael

Lucifer: So Michael said we could keep him

Lucifer: But only if we changed the name

Lucifer: Because he's sexist

Lucifer: So I named him Mark

Lucifer: And we went to the pet store

Lucifer: And got him a big cage and food and stuff

Lucifer: And now there's a guinea pig living in your old room.

Castiel chuckles. That's not quite the story he was expecting, but he's long since learned not to expect anything from his brother. If he wants to talk about the house being haunted by the ghost of a guinea pig, it really shouldn't be a surprise.

Castiel: Okay then. You be you, Lucifer. Just don't kill the pig, okay?

Lucifer: I'll try but no promises.

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