A/N Super long chapter not because anything really happens but because I had no easy chapter breaks and it was fun to write.

Castiel has been dropping subtle hints that his Instagram account is his own for nearly four weeks now. He always answers questions about himself by saying something along he lines of, "I bet Castiel..." He only posts pictures and videos he takes himself, so they're all his originals now.

No one has begun to question it, despite his follower count reaching over one thousand — which sounds like a lot, but it's pretty easy to gain followers like that on fan account, especially now that rumors of his album have stirred. Once he announces his first single, he'll see a lot more people temporarily joining the fan Instagram world for him, too, and his followers will grow more.

He decides to take a quick video of the party so far, subtle enough that no one else would notice, mid conversation so he's speaking and it can really be considered something worthy of being on his fan account, not just something he's present at but silent and invisible. He does it a lot, and no one has picked up on it yet, online or in person.

"But pie is so good!" Dean insists for the millionth time.

"But it doesn't have frosting!" Castiel protests. "That's what makes cake so good! There's a reason they have pie on family holidays and cake at the fun parties."

"Because fun parties are already good enough that you don't need the pie to cheer you up?" Dean substitutes.

"No, because pie would kill the mood, but cake makes it better," Castiel corrects him.

"I don't get why you're arguing about this," Sam tells them. "They're practically the same thing."

"Aw hell no!" both Dean and Castiel say at once, a perfect place to end the video. He doesn't post it yet, instead just locking his phone and placing it in his lap, continuing the conversation as if nothing happened.

It's a few minutes later he gets around to actually posting it. He struggles with the caption, finally just saying that cake is better, and sends it out onto the universe. Per usual, he gets a lot of likes immediately — he has about ten within three minutes. It's not a lot by his old standards, but the life of a noncelebrity is a bit different. As he waits for someone to comment, he scrolls through his feed, admiring the captions again.

"Am I the only one who just randomly starts thinking about Castiel and wondering what he's doing?"

Castiel hesitates before moving on, finally deciding to comment, "I bet he's just sitting on the floor like a little kid and scrolling through social media." Woah, would you look at that? He's completely right! How surprising!

The next caption he reads is on a picture of Castiel, Taylor Swift, and Selena Gomez from some awards show a while back, and the caption is, "I know we all miss Caslor but at the same time, they're both perfect angels, and if something happened to make them not like each other anymore, it has to have been bad for them not to forgive each other. As much as I hate to say it, Taylor does have a reputation as a snake with other celebs. Maybe they're right, and maybe she finally struck Castiel, too."

Castiel's head tilts involuntarily, eyes squinting slightly. Is this really what people think happened? He wishes he could shut the rumor down immediately, but he has no more credibility than this account that posted it, so he just has to hope his logic speaks to people when he says, "Castiel has just been out of the spotlight for a few months. Maybe he just hasn't had the occasion to see Taylor again."

Deciding to clear this up once and for all, he takes a screenshot of the caption and crops everything else out, then heads over to Twitter. He tweets the picture, saying, "Y'all gotta chill. Tay & I are still good."

He doesn't bother waiting for responses, instead switching back to Instagram to continue scrolling through his feed. He's become rather obsessed with this; this idea that he's basically an undercover spy, and he finally gets to see what people think about him without the bias of them trying to please him when they know he's looking.

"All I want rn is for Castiel to come back to Instagram and to get a tumblr account," the next caption reads. It's a common request, and one he's content ignoring. He already has his secret Instagram and has no intention of making a tumblr because he doesn't understand how to use it.

"I hope you all have a good day knowing that Castiel came back from LA after a month and whatever he was working on is probably done."

Well, they're not wrong. The music video is done, at least. The album is still in the works, but for the most part, he's finished that, too.

"How come Castiel is never on Twitter anymore? I mean, I get that he went to LA and he was probably busy, but he never used to go more than two days without tweeting, and even one day was rare. Now he's going a week or so at a time? And he doesn't have any other accounts, so he's not talking to us there, either. He always hypes us up before an album release. Now he's disappearing, and I'm actually really worried."

Castiel sighs. How does he respond to this? As @CastielNovak, there are so many things he could say to them, but as @StanningMishaCollins, his comments mean nothing. He can try to bring about a little clarity, but no one has to believe him. He tries it anyway, in an almost desperate move to make his fans feel better.

"I think we've all agreed he's been working on the new album. I bet it takes a lot of time out of his schedule. Maybe once he announces the first single off it, we'll be seeing a bit more of him."

He would rather not give them a bit more time on Twitter, honestly. The community there is too toxic for him. He already knows he'll be getting a lot of hate for the new song and album and literally everything he does ever, but on Instagram, even people who don't like some of his songs or life choices in general are nice about it. He's yet to see anyone tell someone to commit suicide, which in his mind is a miracle, but on Twitter, a day without a tweet like that is almost unheard of.

"Is that all you ever do?" Charlie asks, flopping on the couch behind him.

He quickly exits Instagram so she can't see that he has an account, opening Twitter instead. He might as well check his replies and hope they aren't too rude.

"Wait, if you weren't on Twitter, what were you doing?" Charlie asks, confused.

"Wattpad," he lies. He knows she knows what it is. She's the one who introduced him to the app in the first place. He's sure she'll believe it.

"Ooh, any good fanfics lately?" she asks excitedly.

"Not yet, no," Castiel replies. "Nothing extraordinarily good, at least. A lot more of them are incorporating Dean into them, though, which is cool."

"Am I in a lot of them?" she asks hopefully. "I mean, I'm, like, your bestest best friend, so I better be."

"Sometimes," he replies. "A lot of them, no, because a lot of people don't seem to know you exist, but you definitely make your way into some of them.

"Awesome," she whispers.

He laughs. Only Charlie would get that excited over having a fan fiction about herself, or even just including her.

"Can I eavesdrop on your Twitter conversations?" she asks.

"Sure," he replies with a careless shrug. "Did you see the tweet?"

"Nope."

He shows it to her quickly, then scrolls down to the replies, shown from most to least popular.

"CASTIEL IS LURKING INSTAGRAM!"

"WHAT? WHEN DID YOU COME BACK TO INSTAGRAM?"

"GUYS DOES CASTIEL HAVE AN ACTUAL ACCOUNT?!"

"WHOEVER POSTED THIS IS A LEGEND FOR REVEALING CASTIEL'S SECRET INSTA."

"Is anyone even gonna mention how Caslor lives on, or are we just going to freak out over his Instagram?"

"So THAT'S where he's been! Instagram!"

"Twitter is better than Instagram don't @ me."

Castiel chuckles and gives that tweet a like, not because he agrees — he definitely doesn't — but because something about it is just funny.

"Is ThAt InStAgRaM?¿?¿"

"Do you have an Instagram?" Charlie asks him.

He nods. "Yep. I'm stalking people anonymously."

Charlie laughs. "Of course you are. You know, only you would do that."

"I know," he replies with a grin.

He returns his attention to Twitter to continue scrolling through responses.

"GUYS LOOK THATS A FAN ACCOUNT HES LOOKING AT FAN ACCOUNTS WHAT IS THIS?"

"Oh goodie. So now he's apparently a stalker, too. Why does anyone actually like this guy?"

Castiel rolls his eyes and passes the tweet. At least he knows that his fans actually like the idea of him "stalking" their accounts, even if not everyone agrees.

"I feel like there's something fishy going on now..."

"What if he's actually seen all our accounts on Instagram and we just don't know?"

"I can't believe he's looking @ his own fan accounts. Such a fucking narcissist."

Castiel's thumb hovers above the tweet for a moment, about to reply, but he stops himself. He's not getting into it with them. Not right now. He has better things to do.

"Is Castiel ditching us Twitter fans for Instagram fans cuz if so I'm gonna be pissed."

This one he does reply to. "I'm still here for you guys, don't worry." He adds a smiley face emoji at the end just because before moving on.

"He just totally threw them under the bus. Everyone's gonna go harass that account now. Such an ass."

Castiel pauses on that tweet. They wouldn't bother that account just for that, right? He quickly exits Twitter and opens Instagram instead. He sees a bunch of likes, 3 new followers, and four comments, none of which he takes the time to look at yet. Instead, he scrolls through his feed to find the account that posted that post to check the replies.

He hops over to the account that made it in his tweet, and their most recent post is, unsurprisingly, the tweet in question. He doesn't hesitate to check the caption on that one.

"GUYS HE SAW MY POST WTF NO STOP WHY DID IT HAVE TO BE THE ONE HE DISAGREED WITH THIS IS SO AWKWARD MAKE IT STOP PLEASE KILL ME NOW."

Seeing that it's his duty to make his fan not feel awkward, he screenshots that caption as well and tweets it, saying, "Not just that one. Your account is lit. Good luck finding me in your 17k followers ;)."

He hits post before he can talk himself out of it. There. Now people are going to be on the lookout for his secret account, and it's more likely any hints he drops will be picked up on quicker. Four weeks is too long to go about it quietly.

"You're stalking your fans, aren't you?" Charlie asks.

"I'm interacting with them," Castiel replies. "I wanted a more unbiased view of what they think of me and want from me than I would have gotten if they knew I was creeping around. Plus, I've made some pretty cool friends, see?"

He shows her his message tab, how to seven individual conversations with other fans and one group chat with the maximum number of fans possible for one chat. Naturally, that group chat is blowing up due to those tweets he just posted.

"Well dang, Mr. Popular," she laughs. "They're gonna flip when they see it's you they've been talking to."

"That's the plan," Castiel replies with a grin.

He never used to DM people when he had his old account. He doesn't even know if it was possible with a verified account. It's cool, chatting with his fans, especially because to them, he's just another fan. They don't even talk about him very much anymore — it was weird, so he tried to move the conversation from one between fans to one between friends within the first two days.

He really does consider them friends. He never realized how much of a community his fans had until he joined it himself. Everyone is so supportive, not just of him but of each other. He sees so many people chatting in the comments with such familiarity, and their bios will say one person lives in Argentina and the other lives in France, and they clearly met through the fandom. He just finds it so sweet.

Almost as if on cue, one of those friends DMs him then. He doesn't hesitate to check it, and immediately, Charlie "Awww"s.

"Hmm?" Castiel asks, glancing back at her.

"You two are so cute!" she gushes.

Castiel chuckles. "She's really sweet. I would send her your way, but, ya know, with Gilda and all..."

Lucifer's head whips up, disrupting his conversation with Gabriel and Sam. "Who's Gilda? Is she a girlfriend? Do you have a girlfriend?"

"Shh!" Charlie shushes him, turning a faint red color. "Everyone's looking!"

"Oh, boo hoo," Lucifer says sarcastically. "Gimme details."

While Charlie fills him in on Gilda, Castiel turns his attention to his DMs, this conversation with a girl named Macie because that's the author's dog's name and she deserves a cameo here.

Macie: CASSIUS DID YOU SEE CASTIELS TWEET?!

Ah, there's the excitement he knows that announcement would bring. Now time to pretend he's just now aware of this.

Castiel OH MY GOD YES!!!

Macie: HE HAS AN INSTAGRAM! HE'S BEEN STALKING OUR FAN ACCOUNTS! LITERALLY ANYONE COULD BE HIM AT THIS POINT!

Ah, she gets it. Interesting that it doesn't occur to her to ask if it's him. The pseudonym Cassius does seem to be a bit suspicious in his mind, but maybe it's just him.

Castiel: WE COULD HAVE BEEN TALKING TO HIM AND NEVER KNEW!

Very subtle, righty?

Macie: AND NOW I WANNA GO LOOKING INTO EVERY DETAIL OF EVERY ACCOUNT FOLLOWING HER AND LOOK FOR ANY SUBTLE CLUES BUT THIS IS CASTIEL NOT TAYLOR AND CASTIEL ISN'T SUPER TRICKY AND SMART LIKE THAT HES JUST A DORK AND IDK HOW WELL WEIRDOS THINK THINGS THROUGH!

"Castiel isn't super tricky and smart." It's phrases like these that he would never hear from fans if they knew they were talking directly to him. He knows exactly what Macie means — while celebrities like Taylor, whom the author stans very hard, think through things and leave tiny hints in well thought out places about literally everything, Castiel just kind of goes for it. "Dork" and "weirdo" are some of the nicest compliments he ever receives.

Castiel: I bet he's just pretending to be such a Castiel stan and chatting with his fans like it's nothing special and they have no idea.

Macie: I bet he's been stalking us here since he remade his Twitter and he's acknowledged so many of us but we'll never get to speak to him again because by the time we figure out who he is he'll already be super popular and barely acknowledging anyone.

He didn't even think about how long people would think he's been around. Instead of commenting on that, he remarks on the other part of the message.

Castiel: What? No way. He's gonna end up following 150k fans and popping in all the time to see what's up.

Macie: How can you be sure?

Castiel: Because they guy loves his fans. Give him the benefit of the doubt.

Macie: I want to, but that's a lot to ask. He's one of the most famous people on the planet. He's gotta be busy. You can't expect him to spend all his time online.

Castiel has to bite back a laugh. Him, busy? What a joke. He basically already is online all the time. Until time comes to start planning his tour — if not this year than probably next — he'll disappear again for a while, but otherwise, he's basically always online.

Castiel: Well, he obviously has time to tweet 24/7 and/or go through people's instagrams. I'm still holding out hope that he'll get to all of us.

Macie: I hope but idk. Not getting my hopes up.

An idea springing to mind, he tells her he has to go, then scrolls through her account for a post to comment on. Obviously, everyone has already been posting like crazy about his tweet, so it's not surprising to see she has, too. There are a few captions about it, none coming as a surprise to him. From oldest to newest, they read:

"HE HAS AN INSTAGRAM!"

"I wonder how many people he's noticed."

"How many people do you think he follows that just don't know?"

"Should we just go through every private account following the account he tweeted and look for one that could be him?"

That's the post he screenshots, hopping over to Twitter. He tweets that picture with the words, "Not private. Some of you guys follow me. <3 you, Macie :)"

And now, time to watch the fangirling.

He doesn't wait for Twitter responses, instead going straight to Macie's account. She obviously has his tweet notifications on, so she should be seeing it immediately. As he waits for a post from her about it, he scrolls through his feed, full of new posts since his tweet. As always, the captions are his favorite things ever.

"GUYS HE HAS AN INSTAGRAM HES BEEN STALKING OUR INSTAGRAMS I DONT KNOW WHETHER TO BE EXCITED OR SCARED."

"Castiel has been on our Instagrams. Castiel knows all our secrets. Castiel knows all."

"Do you think it's just a personal account, or is he secretly a fangirl over himself?"

"He could be any of us. He could be looking at this post right now. He could like this post and no one would ever know."

Obviously, he had to like that post just for that.

"I don't trust any of you anymore. I hope you know that."

"I bet so many people have been noticed by him so far and have no idea."

"I'm going to say that Castiel knows my account just because you can't say he doesn't."

Castiel has to go tweet about this one, too, of course. He screenshots it, posting, "And now you can prove I do."

He finally decides to check the responses to his tweet, because hopping between apps so much is going to give him whiplash. The top tweets are arguably as entertaining as the captains on Instagram.

"We all just know Castiel is sitting at home laughing his ass off because we're all freaking out over this."

He chuckles quietly and gives the tweet a like.

"But you're not laughing," Charlie points out.

Instead of questioning when she started reading over his shoulder again, he says, "I'm laughing on the inside, and that's what counts."

"I think the fandom exploded when they saw this tbh."

"The first tweet was kinda meh but the implications of this one are freaking huge."

"IM FOLLOWING ALL HER FOLLOWERS SO I KNOW IM FOLLOWING CASTIEL TOO."

"BUT ARE YOU PUBLIC OR PRIVATE?! WE NEED ANSWERS!"

Maybe he should look at the responses to the tweet saying he's a public account instead of just that he's following fan accounts. That's what he does, starting at the most popular tweets again.

"HOLY SHIT HE'S PUBLIC."

"Some of us follow him? Guys. He has a fan account. He runs his own fan account."

The first reply to that is, "Because he's a fucking narcissist. Why are you excited about it?"

Interested in how people responded to that, he immediately checks the replies.

"What? No, Castiel, ignore them," Charlie says. "They're just trolls. Don't feed the fire."

"I'm not acknowledging their tweet," Castiel assures her, not taking his eyes off his screen. He can't help but smile at the responses to the so-called troll, almost all of which are positive, before returning to the responses to his own tweet.

"This is kind of weird and kind of awesome. So, basically, it's a very Castiel thing to do."

"So many instas are talking about Bela. He can't not see her."

Castiel hesitates, debating whether to respond to people finally stop asking. He could say something simple, like, "I see her." That would answer everyone's question without starting something. Instead of making a big deal out of it, he just likes the tweet. They'll get the message.

"How much free time does he have? I know from experience that fan accounts take a lot of time."

Castiel replies to this one, saying, "ATM, a lot. Want a new follower? What's your user?"

"This is honestly golden," Charlie laughs. "Won't that give away what account is yours, though?"

"Not if I wait a few hours," Castiel replies. "Other people will see it and follow them. Not a lot, but some. Plus, some people will follow them because of Instagram itself, not Twitter at all." He glances over his shoulder to see Charlie looking confused. "I have this whole thing worked out, don't worry."

"Okay?" she says uncertainly. "Can I follow you, though?"

"Okay, that would give it away," Castiel replies.

"I'm already following a bunch of fan accounts," she tells him. "A lot of my best internet friends are your fan accounts. It won't be suspicious at all."

Castiel hesitates, then nods. "I'll DM you and you can follow me."

That's what he does, typing in a bunch of gibberish to send her from his fan account so she'll know which one it is before flipping back to Twitter and continue looking at responses.

"Can we all agree that Castiel is the only celebrity weird enough to make a fan account for himself? XD."

He can't disagree. He prides himself on being the weirdest celebrity out there, mostly for his fans' sake. No one has to know that in reality, he's just kind of average, except with a flock of people following him just about everywhere he goes.

"*Makes fan account and hopes Castiel will follow me*"

Castiel debates asking for their user, but he never knows if the actions on the asterisks are jokes and exaggerations or if they actually happened, so he doesn't.

"Do you think if we asked his account if it's him, he'd tell us?"

Castiel quotes the tweet, saying, "Are you kidding? This is way too much fun to just stop now. If someone says they're me, they're lying."

He decides to stop hopping between apps, tweeting out, "It occurs to me that a party is not the right place to tweet nonstop so I'm gonna go. See you on insta?"

He clicks his phone off and drops it in his lap carelessly before turning to look at Charlie. "This is a social event. Let's social."