Chapter 17 ~ The Confession

[Louis]

The rest of that day was pretty uneventful other than the fact that people kept staring at me. My friends and Hannah didn't bring up Harry again, which I was happy about. Additionally, I didn't see him another time that school day either.

Once the last bell of the day rang, I went to my locker to get my backpack and jacket before heading towards the exits. I'd told Hannah that she didn't have to wait for me since I wasn't going home. I needed to think, and there was only one place where I could really do that, and that was where I was heading.

Once I had hopped onto the right bus, I sat down in an empty seat. Thankfully, the place wasn't far away, so only five minutes later, I was exiting the bus again. The second I saw the lake, a smile crept to my face. Sure, it didn't look like it did in my mind considering snow was covering the ground now, but it was still my favorite place.

I walked out on the dock and sat down, exactly on the spot where Harry and I used to sit and enjoy each other's company all those years ago. The memory made another smile spread on my lips. Fuck, I shouldn't think this way. However, I just couldn't forget about it all. He just meant so much to me... or did.

"You still come here?"

My insides froze to ice by that voice. No, it couldn't be.

I turned around only to see none other than Harry Styles himself walking towards me. He was only a few feet away, looking at me with no emotion on his face. My heart started racing. This was not what I had expected when I first decided to go here. Not at all.

When I didn't answer him, he let out a sigh and sat down beside me. He kept some distance between us, which I was happy about. I wouldn't be able to handle it if he were closer. We were silent for at least three minutes until he broke it.

"Louis?"

"What? What do you want?" I asked, my voice flat.

He looked out at the icy lake, running a hand through his brown curls. "I... I don't know where to start."

I raised my eyebrows, looking at the side of his face. "What are you even doing here? This place can't possibly mean anything to you anymore."

He let out another sigh, turning his head so he was looking at me. This time, he had a concerned look on his face. "I know I've been acting like an asshole."

Letting out a humorless laugh, I shook my head. "You know what? I don't even know why I'm letting you talk to me. After the way you've treated me the past two years, you shouldn't even deserve to be this close to me." I attempted to stand up and walk away from him, but he pulled me back down by grabbing my forearm.

"Please, Lou."

The nickname made an electric shock go through my heart. No, he couldn't do this. With a frown on my face, I shook my head again. "Don't you dare use that name."

He shut his eyes, his head turned down. "You're still wearing the bracelet," he confirmed, changing the topic.

I didn't reply to him this time either. There was nothing to say. We had both seen each other's bracelets at the party. I could tell it frustrated him that I wouldn't answer his questions by the way he kept squirming. That was another thing I knew about him.

"Why won't you reply to me?" He grumbled.

His words made me knit my eyebrows together. "Because! You don't deserve to get any answers! Did I get any from you when you were away for two years? No! You wouldn't even interact with me!"

I didn't mean to start screaming, but I was angry. So angry. It was like all the anger that had been building up within me during these years was finally exploding in my body.

He bit his bottom lip. "I know. I... but that was wrong of me. I shouldn't have--" He cut himself off by shaking his head.

"What made you even realize that? Last time I talked to you, you were about to hit me. You even told me that I was no one. How come you're talking like this to me now?" I snorted.

He let his eyes fall shut again. "I... I was just mad that you replied to that girl the way you did. I never really thought of the fact that I had changed until I came here and saw the sadness in my mom's eyes... and yours. You've never looked at me the way you did when I first met you at my house. But, I understand. I would be a fool not to. I knew what I did, and there's nothing I can do to ever deserve your forgiveness for that."

"No, there isn't. You don't know how much pain I've been going through during these past two years just because of you. I had no one when you left. I had to start making new friends with the fact that my only friend in my entire life had left me without a word on my mind. Your absence made me so weak, and I hated it. I would never want to go back to that time in my life ever again."

He didn't say anything for a few seconds, and I assumed that was because he was trying to take it all in.

"And then you all of a sudden come back and it turns out you actually are the asshole I had assumed you were. You've never treated me the way you've done the last couple of weeks."

"I made a mistake, Louis. I realize that now. Ever since I came back, everything has started getting back to me. Just the presence of you made my head spin. I couldn't think clearly. But, it wasn't until I noticed you were still wearing the bracelet that I really started realizing what a huge mistake I had made."

I let out a dry laugh. "Funny, isn't it?"

His eyebrows pulled together. "What do you mean?"

Rolling my eyes, I shook my head. "That you realize things two years too late. What you did to me... it's unforgivable. I mean, I don't even know why you decided to abandon me in the first place. Was I not famous enough for you? Was I not worthy of being your boyfriend anymore? Is that it?"

Harry's face was now scrunched up in pain. "No, that's not it. I... I don't know."

"You don't know?" I laughed. "Certainly, there must be some reason why you left me without a word."

He ran his hands over his face, shaking his head. "I was so blind. I was blinded by everything that happened around me. I thought I would be better off without you, that you would just hold me back from everything. It's stupid, I know. So, I tried not to think about you and pushed you to the back of my head."

"And it must've worked considering you never talked to me once. Wow, it feels so much better now, knowing how much I really meant to you."

Again, I attempted to stand up and walk away from him, and this time I managed to because he didn't see it coming.

"Wait, Louis!" He shouted after me, getting up himself.

I turned around, letting out a sigh. "It doesn't matter, Harry. We've both moved on, haven't we? I've got Hannah and you've got Liam. Let's just put our past behind us, yeah? That's what you wanted anyway."

Spinning around again, I started making my way home, not bothering to look back to see if he was following me. I noticed that he was though, considering he spoke up behind me just a minute later.

"We broke up... Liam and I. We broke up."

Well, that had me falter in my steps. They what? When?

"What?" I said, turning around to look at him.

He was looking down at the ground while scratching the back of his neck. "Or, he broke up with me... after the interview on Saturday. He said that I clearly wasn't over you so it wouldn't be fair to himself if he stayed with me."

To say I was surprised would be an understatement. I was speechless. I didn't know what to say. I never saw this coming. Well, at least not that Liam would be the one to break up with him. Not after the way Liam had threatened me the other day. I thought he was more of a fighter than that.

"I... Well, it doesn't change anything though. Ever since you left, I've been trying to move on, and you coming back won't stop me from doing so." With that said, I picked up my pace and ran away from him.

I couldn't see his face after saying those words because I knew I would probably take them back, but it needed to be said. It was the truth. He couldn't come back here and think that things would just go back to how they were before just because he realized he made a mistake. No. I was not that weak.

-

The second I got home, I decided to call Niall. I needed to talk to someone after everything that had happened, and he was the only one who would actually listen to me and not overreact. Sure, Hannah wouldn't probably either, but it felt wrong to talk to her about this.

I was lying on my bed, the phone pressed against my ear.

"Hello?"

"Niall?"

"The one and only."

I chuckled at his response, taking in a deep breath. "How are you?"

"Just dandy. Why are you calling? What happened?"

I rolled my eyes. Did something need to have happened for me to call him? Sure, he was right this time though. "You know I can call you just to talk, right?"

He was quiet for a second on the other end before he spoke up. "I know, but I have a feeling you're calling me for a certain reason right now."

I let out a sigh. "Okay, you're right," I confessed. "Harry followed me after school to talk to me."

Niall let out a gasp. "No way. What did he do? Don't tell me he tried to take you back. I swear, I'm gonna beat the sh--"

"Niall, please," I laughed. "I can stand up for myself. And, well, he kind of did try to apologize for his behavior, but I told him I wouldn't have it."

Again, he was quiet for a second. "I'm proud of you, Louis. To be honest, I think all three of Zayn, Hannah and I were sure that he was going to try and make a move sometime. I mean, you're irresistible, Louis. It was bound to happen."

Rolling my eyes, I shook my head. "Stop it. That's not true."

"It is, and you know it. However, I'm proud because I never thought you would be able to resist him once he realized his huge mistake. Just watching you trying to move on from him made both me and Zayn nervous. I guess that was why we were so protective in the beginning. Obviously, there was no use, though. You handled it all by yourself."

You could even hear the proudness in his voice, making me almost blush. If he only knew what my mind was thinking whenever I was near the curly haired boy... He wouldn't be so proud then.

"Thank you, but I don't deserve it. I was just so shocked that he just turned like that. Sure, I had my suspicions a few weeks ago, but then he got angry with me again, and I thought I had mistaken. It's just hard to take in the fact that he doesn't hate me..." I trailed off.

Niall hummed on the other hand. "Yeah, but you shouldn't trust every word he says either. You know how he's treated you before. What if this is just some stupid trick to try and get you back just to break you again? I mean, he's going to leave sometime, right?"

To be honest, I hadn't really thought about that. What if he was right? What if Harry was just sad that Liam had broken up with him and wanted some kind of rebound? What if his plan was to break it off with me once he was going back on tour?

"I never really thought about that," I confessed, biting my bottom lip.

"Well, then I am more than happy to hear that you decided to make the right decision without that thought on your mind," he chuckled.

I nodded even though he couldn't see me. "Yeah..."

After staying quiet for a while, I noticed that Niall was about to say something else. "You know you made the right decision, right?"

I didn't need to think twice before replying to him. "Yes, of course."

"Hannah really does like you. She's good for you."

"I know."

"Good because you two are really cute together. I'm happy you found her in the mess you were in. I think she's one of the reasons why you managed to move on as you did from Harry," he said, and you could hear in his voice that he really meant it.

A smile spread on my lips. "I guess. It all just confuses me so much. First, he comes back from nowhere and then now he apologizes... It's just so hard to take it all in. I'm sorry to bug you with this, Niall."

He snorted on the other end. "Don't even start, Louis. I'm happy you're talking to me. You really do have to talk to someone right now, and I'm feeling blessed to be that person. Plus, I understand that you have a hard time registering everything. I would have too if I were in your situation. However, as long as you know what the right thing to do is, I don't think it'll be a problem. You're strong, Louis. Much stronger than either of Zayn or I expected you to be. Keep that in mind."

The smile I had on my face widened by his words. "Thank you, Niall. I kind of needed to hear that right now. You're a really great friend, you know that?"

"Pfft, of course I do," he bragged, making me laugh.

"Great."

After exchanging a few other words, we hung up on each other. Mom had called down for dinner and Niall said his mom had done the same, so it was probably best to listen to them.

Once I had gotten up from the bed, I exited my room and went down the stairs only to notice that my other family members were already sitting at the kitchen table, mom placing the saucepan on the table. When I entered the room, she turned to me with a smile on her face.

"There you are, Lou. Anne just called a few minutes ago. She wanted to talk to you."

Oh, crap.

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Hello guys! It's been a little while since I updated... I've been really busy with both school and work. I apologize. I hope you liked the chapter though.

Pauline .xx