The afternoon glow was beginning to seep in through the library windows, and as I sat alone at a table with a few books sprawled about and overlooking Paradise from the window at my side, I really started to appreciate the sight.

The way the orange light got darker as the seconds passed, covering the pages as I heard the rustle and shuffle of books being read and moved about, and even though the library looked so well kept the air had a light presence of dust, no doubt to add to the aesthetic of the place and make it seem like a much more mystical library than it really was.

As I found myself staring out at the sunset after a whole afternoon's worth of reading, idly rolling a pencil between my fingers for the sake of doing something, I came to the conclusion that I had absolutely nothing to do.

I was at a standstill when it came to Li, unable to get more information lest I wanted to be tortured again. The trap door we found in the forest still filled me with confusion, and I had no ideas on how to trigger any more memories.

Apart from maybe exposing myself to dangerous situations and hoping for the best, but I wasn't that stupid.

Not yet, at least.

Regardless, the fact was that I was spending this day in the library by myself.

...Now that I thought about it, it wasn't such a bad thing.

I still needed to do something, and that something wasn't staying here all night.

I put everything away and went back to 1-A, going through with what I said.

Helping Antoinette wasn't something I thought I'd willingly be doing, so the fact I was even out here still surprised me.

I decided to walk back instead of teleporting, knowing it wouldn't be that long of a trip anyway.

As I walked and felt the cool breeze against my face, I wondered again about Antoinette. Why had I decided to help? It was a thing of moment, I suppose, but there was something else.

What that was, I'm not sure, but it was there.
All I knew was that if she'd be doing this by herself with her own terrible idea, then it would absolutely backfire; we both knew how stupid it was.

Maybe that's why I went the extra mile to figure out a way to actually help her, we were friends and I didn't want her to fail.

I reached that conclusion when I arrived at 1-A ten minutes later.

I wouldn't know until much later that that wasn't the reason why I was doing this.

But for the time being, I entered 1-A to find Antoinette sleeping at the table with a half finished cup of coffee at her side. It was cold.

I would have woken her up then and there, but she looked so peaceful that I decided against it. The apartment was quiet, meaning Kristina and Claire must still be out, and that this silence would be temporary.

With a sigh, I decided to call it a night as well and sleep, but not before covering her with the bedsheet from her own bed, so that she'd at least spend the night without freezing.

The inside of my room was empty and silent. I briefly wondered where Kristina and Claire were, but as I got into bed I realized I didn't really mind. There was something mythical about this silence.

I don't know how much time passed before I started with a jolt, hearing a screech from the other room.

I fell off the bed and ran to the living room, tripping over myself in my haste and from how dark it still was.

When I arrived, I distinguished Antoinette's shadowy silhouette kicking at someone from the floor as she screeched.

"Who's- get out of here, out!" she shouted.

"No, no, it's me! It's me, Claire!"

The other shadowy figure started taking a familiar form, Antoinette carefully stopped her flailing when she noticed it as well.

"Claire?" she asked - shouted. "What are you - what the hell's the matter with you? Sebastian, turn - turn the damn lights on, I can't see shit like this - what time is it?!"

Claire laughed sheepishly. I rubbed the bridge of my nose and turned the lights on, seeing the screen fade to life for a second to display the time: 4 AM.

Claire was standing with a hand over her stomach and a painful smile on her face. Antoinette was with her back against the chair, glaring and breathing heavily. My focus went to her, but I addressed the other first.

"Claire, it is four in the morning, what are you doing?"

"You better have a damn good reason," said Antoinette, fuming.

Claire laughed, an apologetic sounding one, and said.

"I just came by to pick something up, it's no big deal! Kristina asked me to cause I'm the strong one out of us two. But I couldn't do it..."

The choice of words made me wary, but when I looked at Antoinette she seemed to have reached the same conclusion I had.

"What the hell - were you planning on kidnapping me?"

"Just for a little while!"

Claire's innocent way of answering was almost as off-putting as what she was planning on doing.

"That doesn't make it any better, you idiot! Why the hell would you think that would be a good idea?"

"It was a decision of the moment," she whined. "We were out preparing for the party tomorrow night and thought it'd be cool to get you a date or something, so we were gonna hook you up with one of my friends! He plays the guitar, you know?"

"Get out of here!"

She threw a pillow at Claire, who yelped and caught it with her face.

With an apologetic Claire and a frustrated Antoinette who stormed back to her room, the rest of the night passed with little more happening.

The following morning, when I woke up five hours after that incident, I entered the living room to the general silence of 1-A.

I thought nothing of it, or tried to anyway, and as I did realized that it the living room was empty and in the state we'd left it last night: the pillow on the floor and the blanket near it.

Part of it concerned me. I knew it might have been strange to think about that, but I was really starting to realize just how Antoinette didn't get along with Claire and Kristina.

Being in 1-A together should mean they were meant to click, but the more I saw their relationship the less I believed it.

In a sick way I was glad it meant that Li wasn't as perfect as everyone seemed to think.

...I'd have to bring this up to Antoinette later.
Minutes pass, and as I'm having breakfast I hear Li's obnoxious voice coming from the screen.

"Good morning, everyone! A reminder that tonight, from 7 PM onwards, the event hall will be open for the Christmas party. Please remember to keep civility to make it an enjoyable experience for all!" is what it said, before returning to silence.

A frown grew on my face as soon as it was done.
I tried to ignore the screen's existence and, after finishing breakfast, went to wake up Antoinette.

"Fuck off, I'm tired," she had mumbled, still half asleep when I tried.

Ten minutes later we were both sitting at the living room table. I could tell just by looking at Antoinette's face that she didn't like this idea, but if she was looking at my face, then she would realize I would go through with it anyway. I didn't spend all yesterday researching about this stuff just for her to say no.

I also did it because I have no friends and that was the easiest way to pass the time, but that's another point.

It might have been a mistake for what I knew, but honestly, if Antoinette wants to score with some random kid, then I at least have to help her become more, well... more likeable. The grouchy attitude she has may be attractive to me, but I don't think it would work for many others.

"The first thing we need to talk about is your aggressive attitude."

"What? Screw you, I don't have an aggressive attitude."

The more time we passed doing this, the more I realized that Antoinette wasn't cut out for this.
In all the books I'd read, it put a great emphasis on acting ladylike, on taking initiative, on following a so called protocol that I, personally, found ridiculous. but at a lack of a better source figured it was the best path.

According to these books, Antoinette was exactly the sort of girl that would be "undesirable to male eyes", which was a curious thing; everything the books said were bad were all things I found were part of her charm: proud, hot headed, direct but sort of awkward around strangers - not in a "cute" way, and definitely not feminine, which was a controversial word to begin with.

Many times I found myself doubting the words in these books, but it's not like I had time to look for sources I agreed with, so I assumed these as the truth.

We went at it non-stop for the whole day, only stopping twice to rest a bit. With the party looming over us as the screen shows us the time (6:00 Pm), I felt as if my crash course on how to get guys to like you went in one ear and flew out the other... The only things that were different were that we were both tired, and that Antoinette learned how not to be salty if something annoyed her. But even that was a work in progress...

"I'm gonna go get ready," she said once I finished my speech of smooth talking. She seemed to be in a rush, which I found stupid, considering we still had at least an hour before it started, but didn't press on it.

We didn't see Claire nor Kristina during the whole day, and when the night time arrived, we had stopped caring anyway. I didn't want to bring it up; every time i thought about it, last night's scene popped into my head.

When the time was drawing nearer, Antoinette was once again being stubborn about going, apparently willing to let my efforts go to waste.

"It's a bad idea anyway, there's no way this can end well," she said, completely contradicting her earliest statement, "Either he rejects me, or - or he makes fun of me, or I make things incredibly awkward - there's no way I can win in this."

It was good to know her undying optimism was still at large. But at the same time, this really was harder than I thought.

"Antoinette, it's just one guy, you're being dramatic."

"You don't understand, this might be my only chance at establishing relationships outside of 1-A. I can't mess this up."

I raised an eyebrow. She continued.

"This guy - he doesn't look at me like I'm a weird person like everyone else does."

"I thought you didn't care what other people think about you."

She let out a sound of frustration.

"Of course I care, I'm not some heartless jerk... Sure, I don't care about what a lot of people think of me because as long as I'm sure of what I'm doing then that should be enough, right? Right - but that doesn't mean I want to be alone."

I was taken back. That was a surprising amount of emotion from Antoinette.

Carefully, I said:

"Then don't be...? This is your chance to not be alone, so - go make a friend, or a boyfriend or whatever. Come on, you can't tell me you're afraid now, didn't you say you didn't like cowards?"

"When did I say that?"

"You didn't, it just seemed like something you would."

She didn't respond to that like I thought, but instead kept a focused stare on me, as though carefully thinking over her options.

She groaned and leaned against the wall, mumbling a curse and a stubborn: "Fine, I'll go."