FOURTEEN

boarded-up windows

How evergreen, our group of friends
Don't think we'll say that word again
And soon they'll have the nerve to deck the halls
That we once walked through

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CAS WALKED DOWN THE HALLWAY, A bag in her hand. The guards to the throne room let her in when she smiled at the guards. She saw Loki on the throne, his head resting on his fist as he looked outside.

"Loki," Cas said, a soft smile on her face as Loki looked at her. She turned her head slightly. "Are you okay?"

"hm?" He said, turning to face her. "Oh yes. I'm alright." Cas narrowed her eyes, not believing him. she didn't prod, she was leaving him. she didn't want to leave him on a potential argument.

"You're leaving," Loki said, stepping off the throne. Cas nodded as he hugged her, his breath soft on her shoulder.

"I love you," She murmured, pressing her lips to his. "I'll be back soon, I promise."

Loki nodded, and Cas walked out the door, looking back at him as she did. He was back on the throne, assuming the previous position.

There was something wrong with Loki, Cas just couldn't tell what.

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CAS WANTED TO LEAVE THE NIGHT after Thor was Corenated king. Things, Cas realized wouldn't be going as planned. But she really needed to go, the tips of her fingers were turning slightly black. It hadn't ever gotten this bad. She also had never lived in another god's pantheon and been away for so long.

As soon as she stepped onto Midgard, she felt a world better. She was in new york, the world around her bright and loud with the bustle of traffic. She shoved her hands in her pockets, walking past a red-haired woman carrying a little girl and cooing as they walked together, another woman holding the redhead's hand.

"Madelyn's getting cold Ames," the woman said. Cas smiled, walking past them. She didn't say anything, she only thought their dynamic was cute, that maybe she would get that someday.

She, of course, was getting ahead of herself

Cas smiled softly as she headed down towards the new york sanctum, which could deliver her to Greece, where she could get home easier than going to California. She could have had Heimdal send her with the Bifrost to California or Greece, but Cas loved new york and wished for a visit. So she did the latter and told her father (mentally) to deal with it.

"Good morning Cas," The ancient one said. "how have you been?" She was already getting Cas tea and preparing chairs as soon as Cas stepped inside.

"I've been really well," Cas said, her voice a breathy chuckle. "you were right."

"Last I heard you were getting married," The ancient one said, handing Cas tea and sitting down before her. "how did that work for you?"

"it didn't end up happening," Cas said. "I realized that I was in love with someone else."

Cas told the story. She talked about Loki, and then mentioned how odd he was acting today. The ancient one only nodded, hiding something from Cas. She narrowed her eyes at the Ancient one but didn't delve deeper.

"I should get going," Cas aid, looking at her fingertips, a faded gray that would go away the second she stepped down there.

"Of course," The Ancient one said, allowing Cas to leave.

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CAS HAD STOOD BEFORE THE GATES OF DEATH many times before.

"Cas!" Charon called, making the girl turn around and wave at him. "you're home!"

"Asgard is my home," Cas hissed under her breath before smiling at Charon. "Only for about a year."

"You're going back out?" He asked, tilting his head. Cas nodded with pursed lips, walking through the gates to see one of the only things she was excited to see.

"Cerberus, baby," She cooed, walking towards him with a smile. "How've you been?" He sent one of his heads on Cas' shoulder, as she tried her best to pet the other two heads, before getting to the third one. "I missed you." He whimpered as Cas walked away, blowing the dog three kisses as she headed up the hill to Hestia's palace.

It was close to the solstice so Hestia wouldn't be in, she set her things down in her room, and wandered around the house for a bit. She didn't recognize herself in the mirror, red hair and faded freckles, her skin yellowed and pale, and the shape of life gone from her features.

She crossed the Styx with a sigh and headed into the gates of the place that would mark the top of her list as the worst place to be.

As she passed the gardens of Persephone, the flowers began to gain color. She smiled, even with the stygian ichor in her body, she sill could make life. She could keep plants alive, much to the shock of many people who knew her. It was almost funny how her magic contradicted itself.

Persephone was gone, it was June and she was above ground for the summer, leaving Cas with poorly planned father time. She kept reminding herself that it was only six months. only six months. only six months.

She sat down on the bench, squeezing her eyes closed, closing her hand into a fist, breathing out as she released it, leaning back and letting herself relax. She was putting off the impending, trying to ground herself on the black marble bench.

The place before her was beautiful ebony lined with gold. It was beautiful, unrivaled however to that of Asgard. She loved the way Asgard felt, the atmosphere was, to put it bluntly, more alive. She summoned enough courage to stand and walk into the palace, turning the heads of guards who showed her to the throne room.

"Cas," Her father's voice said, shock laced in his tone.

"Hello dad," She said, tilting her head slightly.

END OF ACT TWO

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AUTHOR SPEAKS!

so this is 2011, about a year before Amara died. just an FYI for the timeline in case you were wondering (Maddy would be five or six here)

also, the pacing and times of evermore are a very hot mess don't trust it I just don't have it in me to rewrite it and my creative writing teacher would probably crucify me if I started another project