a/n: i won't be updating this story for a while, so if you want to see some of my better writing (that i will be updating) check out my new story "of planets and playlists"!

Dedicated to: @jennamark

(A/N: NO HATE IN THIS CHAPTER, PLEASE. THIS INSECURITY IS SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE FEEL, OKAY?

"You're in love with him?"

Emma, Samara and Florence screeched. We were all gathered in my room in the chalet and Emma was face timing us. It was an hour after I was sitting with Harper on the sofa. I winced.

"Guys, shut up! He'll hear you!" I hissed.

Florence rolled her eyes. "His room is on the other side of the chalet. But seriously, Noelle? You love him?"

I nodded shyly and blushed. Emma whooped from my computer screen.

"I fucking knew it!" She screamed, bouncing up and down on her chair. "The ship is sailing!"

"Please, the ship has already sailed and reached the destination." Samara replied, flapping her hands around in excitement.

What interesting friends I have.

Why did I tell them first, again?

That's right, because you don't want Mom and Maggie to cause an uproar.

I turned cautiously to Florence. "What do you think?" I asked quietly. She was looking down at her Tiffany and Co ring infested fingers.

"I don't know." She began. "I mean, me? I prefer not to fall in love with guys. That's not my thing. But I can't say for you. Just, Noelle- " she finally looked up at me. "Don't get your heart broken, okay?"

I smiled softly. "I can't promise that. We're not even dating."

"Yet," Emma added. Samara nodded and I glared.

"Probably not." I sighed, pulling at my pyjamas.

"Can I be the first to tell her that everything she's saying is complete- " Florence cut Emma off with a glare.

"Fine," Emma huffed.

"Do you know for sure you're in love?" Samara asked. I nodded immediately.

"I know it. I don't know how, but I do. Whenever he looks at me- "

"Ew!" Florence yelled. "I don't want to know the details, not all that sappy stuff! I'm leaving!"

And with that, she dashed out of my room in her sheepskin Uggs. I laughed and Samara and Emma couldn't help but grin.

"So... what's your next step?" Samara turned to me.

"Next step?"

"What are you going to do now that you've realised your in love?"

I blushed. "Nothing, I guess. Just see where everything takes me." I paused. "That's what they do in books anyway, right?"   

---------------------------

"Good morning!" Someone yelled in my ear. I screamed, falling out of bed and landing on the floor, dragging half the bed's blankets off as I moaned in pain. The yelling was backed up by a huge outburst of laughter.

I opened my eyes warily to see Harper staring down at me, amusement dancing in his eyes.

"You idiot," I groaned, pulling the duvet over my head to try and block out the morning sunlight. "Why the hell did you wake me up?"

Harper ignored my question. "You're not seriously going to sleep on the floor, are you?"

I grumpily pulled the blanket away from my face. "I will if you don't answer my question."

He sighed. "Well maybe because it happens to be one in the afternoon and it's your birthday."

Oh my gods!

I completely forgot!

You know, what with all the I-figured-out-I'm-in-love-with-Harper stuff.

"Seriously?!" I shrieked, sitting up quickly on the floor. Harper nodded.

"It's December the 12th, baby doll."

"Why didn't you wake me up sooner, you baboon?" I yelled, jumping up from the ground and grabbing Harper's hand.

"I'd say I'm a quite bit more attractive than a baboon," Harper huffed under his breath. I ignored him, pulling him out of the room and rushing down the stairs. I rushed into the kitchen, only to find everyone sitting there.

"Happy birthday!" They all yelled. I grinned, tossing myself onto the sofa.

"Thank you." I replied.

Time to tone down the craziness.

"You're the same age as me now, baby doll." Harper said, sitting down on the sofa next to me, pulling an arm around my shoulder.

"When are you turning eighteen?" I asked.

"July 15th."

My mom walked in at that, large vanilla cake in hand, a fandom sign decorated on the cake.

Cake.

Mmmmm...

A few minutes later, we were all curled up on the sofas after singing me happy birthday, eating cake. I had somehow moved closer to Harper in this time, so I was resting against his side, spooning the vanilla-y goodness into my mouth that seemed to have a faint undertone of cotton candy which was surely due to my mother.

"So... tonight we decided that we should all go swimming, Noelle. You know, for your birthday." Mom said.

I choked on my cake.

"What? It's below freezing outside, we'll die!" I protested.

"Noelle, she meant the hot jacuzzi." Florence called out.

"Oh." I blushed. "Right."

"And then we're going for dinner at the hotel's main restaurant nearby." Maggie added. I nodded.

Insert awkward silence here, where nobody knows what to say.

"Come on, baby doll, you're seventeen. It's about time you learnt how to bake something." Harper stood up, looking down at me. I raised an eyebrow.

"You know how to bake?" I questioned, amused.

Harper narrowed his eyes. "You sound doubtful."

"That's because I am," I replied. I turned to my mom. "Do I have to?"

Before she could reply, Harper had picked me up, slinging me over a shoulder as if I weighed nothing. He positioned me so I was facing his back. I heard Mom and Maggie laughing.

"Put me down!" I yelled in anger, shock and surprise. After all, I'm not used to be slung over hot boy's shoulders. "Harper Andrews, I demand you, unhand me!" I pummelled my fists into his back.

We were now out of the living room, walking down the long corridor to the kitchen.

"Tell me, baby doll, what amazing reason should I put you down for?" Harper chuckled.

"Because," I said through gritted teeth. "It's my freaking birthday! I have rights!" And everyone also probably saw up my sleeping shorts- they're really short, in case you haven't noticed!"

God, boys.

"Oh, trust me baby doll, I've noticed." I could almost sense Harper's smirk. "And don't worry. Nobody can see up your shorts."

Thank god.

"Good," I sighed in relief, leaning my elbows against Harper's back and resting my head in my hands.

Wait...

"You looked?!" I demanded. Harper chuckled.

"Oh, look! We've reached the kitchen!" He exclaimed, setting me down so I was sitting on a counter. I glared at him, trying not to blush from embarrassment.

"Answer my question, jerk," I said firmly. Well, I tried to say firmly. "Did you look?"

Harper grinned and ran a hand through his messy hair. "Maybe."

I groaned, turning to the fridge. "Pervert," I muttered.

"Only for you, babe." Harper answered quickly. I rolled my eyes, nevertheless I couldn't help the small smile that grew on my face.

I ignored him and went through the fridge pulling out ingredients. "What do we need?" I asked him. Harper rattled off a list of ingredients and I took them out and set them on the counter.

"And eggs," he finally finished. I nodded, grabbing two eggs from the fridge and turning to him. But, being the clumsy person I am, I just had to slip.

And where did the eggs that I was holding end up when I fell?

Harper's sweater.

I stood up, gaping at Harper. His black sweater now had egg running down it, parts of the shell sticking to the sleeves. His face was of utter horror as he stared in shock down at his sweater.

Drama queen.

A small giggle escaped my mouth. Harper looked up, an evil look on his face.

"You didn't." He grinned.

"I did." I challenged back.

Harper reached out behind me, grabbing an egg and smashing it on my head. In turn, I grabbed the flour and poured it over his.

"That's it, baby doll." Harper grabbed the tomatoes and threw them at me. I leaped across the kitchen, grinning, and grabbing the jug of orange juice.

"I'm going to win this!" I yelled.

"Good luck with that!" Harper replied sarcastically.

He's going down.

I let out a battle cry and vaulted towards him, landing on Harper and pushing him down so he was lying on the floor. I cried out and removed the top of the jug, pouring the orange juice over his head. I cackled as he tried to spit away the orange juice.

"What on earth do you think you're doing?"

Oh no.

I stopped pouring the orange juice and Harper and I both faced to see my mom in the doorway, arms crossed sternly. I quickly jumped off Harper and stood up. Harper tried to stand up but slipped in the orange juice, falling back to the floor again. I awkwardly helped him up.

"I repeat- what are you doing?"

Harper and I both glanced at each other.

"Baking?" I weakly attempted.

My mom's face darkened.

Brace yourself.

The storm didn't come.

Mom sighed. "Go upstairs and get yourself cleaned up, you two. Go watch a movie or something. I'll clean up the mess with Maggie. We're bored, anyway."

I gaped at her. "What?"

"It's your birthday, darling. Plus, you're a teenager. I suppose I shouldn't be mad at you for having a food fight, at least it's not drugs or something. Just leave before I change my mind."

Woahhhhh.

Today must be a really good day for her.

"Um, are you sure, Ms Richards? It would be no trouble- " Harper cut in. She shook her head, laughing, before turning to me.

"You've got yourself a good catch there, Noelle." She winked at me and gestured to Harper. I flamed red. "It's okay, kids. Just go."

I nodded and sprinted off, not wanting to see Harper's reaction.

------------------------

"Good catch?"

Harper asked, smirking and walking into my room, towelling off his hair. I groaned and buried my face into my pillow, inhaling the scent of the detergent.

"I don't like you, just in case you were wondering." I lied, my voice muffled by the pillow. I looked up at Harper. His expression shattered for a moment, before it was replaced by the smirk. He put a hand over his heart.

"You should be careful with my feelings, baby doll. They're precious, you know." He patted his chest and sat down next to me on my bed, tucking his feet up, before laying his head on my lap.

Oh my gods.

"What are you doing?" I asked in alarm. He grinned.

"What?" Harper answered innocently.

I groaned. "Get off, you baboon." I shoved his head off.

"You're no fun." He pouted.

"Yes, I am no fun. Now shut up and put on a movie."

Harper stood up and slipped something into the disk player. He sat down next to me and I waited.

The words Mockingjay Part I came up on the screen.

I screamed.

"Oh my gods!" I screeched, grabbing Harper's arm. "Where did you get it? Thank you so much!" I hugged him.

Harper chuckled. "Since we didn't get to see the movie together, I bought it for you. I knew how excited you were."

Boyfriend goals.

"Thank you!" I yelled, shaking him violently as the first scene appeared. "This is an amazing birthday present! No really, Harper. Thanks."

"No problem, baby doll." Harper slung an arm over my shoulder. I was immediately reminded if the day before, when I realized I loved him.

I love him.

The words sent butterflies through my stomach.

"And this isn't your only birthday present from me," he chuckled. I stared at him wide eyed. "I was waiting till later, but- " he pulled out a small box from his pocket and handed it to me. "Here."

I glanced up at him quickly, before opening the box.

Inside it was a rose gold chain bracelet lying on a grey cushion. Attached to it were several different charms. An 'N' for Noelle, a multi-fandom sign, a Deathly Hallows symbol, Harry Potter's glasses, a golden snitch, and a closed book. The charms were tiny, and so very intricately designed. I gaped up at Harper.

"This is for me?" I asked, disbelieving. He ran a hand through his hair anxiously.

"Do you like it? Because if you don't, I can always return it- "

"Don't worry you idiot, I love it!" I shouted, flinging myself at him. I wrapped myself around him in a giant bear hug. I heard him laugh in my ear and hug me back.

I pulled away, taking the bracelet gently out of the box. "Thank you."

"Stop saying that, baby doll. I told you. This is the least of the things that I would do for you."

I grinned shyly and tried to clasp the metal onto my wrist.

"Woah, woah, woah," Harper interrupted, taking the bracelet from me.

"I'm a gentleman, so I must put it on for you." He protested.

"Fine, Mr Gentleman," I teased. "Do it."

He wrapped the chain around my wrist, before pausing and frowning, as if he had no idea what to do. Then, hesitantly, he clasped it.

I smiled, then hesitantly leaned up to peck him on the cheek.

-----------------------

"Woah, what happened to her?" Florence asked, looking down at me in disdain. Mockingjay had just finished and I was lying at the foot of the TV sobbing, Harper awkwardly trying to comfort me.

"Peeta," I wailed.

"I have no fucking idea," Harper shook his head. He glanced down at me. "It's not that bad, Noelle. At least he's not dead."

What did that muggle say?

I glared at him.

They never understand.

"You have ten seconds to run." I hissed. Harper moved away, alarmed.

"Bye." He quickly said to Florence, before rushing out of my room.

Good.

Florence chuckled. "Good going, baby sister. Now get changed."

I pushed myself up from the floor to look at her in all her Gucci clad glory.

"What?"

"We're going to the jacuzzi soon. Get changed into your swim suit- Mom packed it for you. Go now, Mom said that the rest of us will be there in an hour; Samara didn't have time to get you a present so we're all going now." Florence rattled off. I nodded and she left my room. I crawled to my suitcase, rummaging through it, pulling out a certain turquoise swim suit. I stared at it in horror.

Actually, not a swimsuit.

A freaking bikini.

I frantically searched through my suitcase, fervently hunting for something else. The only thing I could retrieve was a white swim top. I groaned.

I bet Emma was behind this.

I sighed and got changed into the bikini and slipped the swim top on top. I awkwardly readjusted it and walked to the jacuzzi room.

That's right. The chalet had a jacuzzi room.

The first thing I saw was the jacuzzi. It was quite big, fitting maybe eight people. And there, sat in the jacuzzi, was Harper.

Shirtless.

Oh gods.

I screamed and awkwardly crossed my arms over my body, feeling self conscious in my bikini and slightly see-through white swim top.

I don't wear bikinis. I feel insecure and self conscious in them. My body isn't perfect- I have scars, and bruises, and stretch marks- I can't stand the thought of people watching me and judging me for it.

You could say I was scared of wearing bikinis.

"Hey." Harper grinned. "Come in."

I awkwardly slipped into the warm water beside him. "I thought you were going with everyone else to get Samara's gift for me?"

He raised an eyebrow and gave me a weird look. "No...?"

Mom.

Of course.

"Our moms set this up, didn't they?" I asked Harper, frustrated, leaning my head back. He nodded. "Most probably."

I saw Harper's eyes quickly skimming my body, before tinting with disappointment.

I sighed, bringing my knees up to my chest in an attempt to cover my torso.

"Well what do we do now?"

Harper pondered for a moment. "Truth or truth?"

I shrugged.

Harper smirked. "Truth or truth, m'lady?" I grinned at his terrible attempt of a British accent.

"Truth."

"Have you lived in California all your life?" Harper asked. I nodded.

My turn.

"Why did you move to California from Dallas?"

"Mom's job moved. She had a choice between California or Florida." He answered back, casually. I nodded for him to continue.

"Are you happy she chose California?" Harper asked me, smirking a little.

That was unexpected.

I shifted in my seat, unsure of how to answer.

Well, obviously, idiot, I'm in love with you.

But I couldn't say that.

"Yeah." I nodded slowly. "You're a good friend." I almost choked.

That actually physically pained me to say.

Harper smiled quickly, before looking down at his fingers. It was then when I noticed how much more attractive Harper had seemed to me since I told myself I loved him. He used to seem to glow in my eyes before, but now he seemed as radiant as the sun.

That means that if you get too close you'll get burnt.

It was meant to be my turn, by Harper asked the next question.

"Why do you wear that shirt over your bikini?" He asked bluntly.

I blushed uncontrollably. "Um... it's comfortable?"

Harper shook his head, his eyes blazing. "I'm serious, Noelle."

"S- so am I," I countered back, nervously.

He moved closer to me in the water. "Noelle, I know that's not the real reason. Why do you do it? Every girl likes to show off their body, but you- you don't. And I can't help but wonder why." He chuckled darkly. "I sound like a pedophile, don't I? Sorry, but I'm going to sound like that for the rest of the conversation."

I nodded numbly.

Do I tell him?

No, you'll seem like a freak.

As if reading my thoughts, Harper spoke. "Don't worry, I won't think of you any differently if you do decide to tell me. It's your choice."

I awkwardly twiddled with the ends of my hair.

Do it.

He's helped you with tons of stuff before, hasn't he? He can help you now.

Shut up, Noelle! You're not some damsel in distress!

I just need to get this off my chest.

"I don't like showing off my body," I mumbled quietly. The tension in the air thickened when Harper stayed quiet. "I don't want the world to see my body. I don't like my body. I'm not happy with it."

"Why not?" Harper asked quietly. I didn't hear anything in his voice.

"Because it's ugly." Tears of frustration rose in my eyes. "It's bruised, and scarred, and has stretch marks, and isn't perfect at all- "

"I think you're perfect." Harper said softly. I stopped, surprised, and looked at him.

"What?"

"I don't think you should be insecure, Noelle. Nobody should. I don't care what you're body looks like- if you're overweight, you're thin, hell, I don't care if you have green skin. It doesn't matter to me. It won't change anything, to me." Harper finished, taking in a deep breath, his green eyes burning mine.

I froze.

"You're beautiful just like that." He added.

I couldn't speak.

"Harper- "

He nodded.

Slowly, hesitantly, I reached for the edge of the swim top, pulling it over my head. The bikini wasn't revealing, perfectly normally sized.

Nevertheless, my I could hear my heart beat as Harper stared at me. He didn't look at my body, just staring intently at my face.

He doesn't care what you look like, Noelle.

Harper was much closer now, somehow, he had moved without me noticing. Whereas I was sitting on the tile bench thing in the jacuzzi, he was kneeling on the floor in front of me, still taller than me by a few inches despite his position.

I watched his eyes scan my face, from my eyes, to my nose, to finally my lips.

I held my breath.

His face was so close to mine, I could feel his cool breath on my skin. His hands were at my waist, sending sparks jolting up my spine. My breathing was short and shallow, the golden flecks in his eyes dancing through the sea of green, teasing me playfully. From this close, I noticed the light freckles adorning his face, and I awkwardly shifted my hands in the water so they were clasped together tightly.

I didn't want Harper to notice them shaking.

He inched closer.

My heart was quickly launched into overdrive, hammering against my chest.

His lips.

Oh my gods, his lips.

They were so close to mine. I couldn't breathe anymore, Harper had stolen away what little oxygen I had, merely from being near to me. He had yet to look back up at my eyes, his gaze purely focused on my lips.

My heart was yelling, screaming, threatening to explode.

He's going to kill me, one day.

Better sooner than later.

Finally, I couldn't take it anymore.

"Harper?" I pleaded desperately.

"Yeah?" He murmured, flicking his eyes up for just a second, eyes glinting hopefully.

"Kiss me."

And so he did.

SO IT HAPPENED

YASSSSS GUYS YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Goal: 80 votes?

Dedication: feelings on this chapter ;)

REMEMBER TO:

VOTE

COMMENT

FOLLOW

SHARE

-A xx