"taehyung?"

jimin took a seat beside him, wrapping his arms around his legs on the couch. taehyung sat curled into himself with a blanket draped over his frail body.

"do you want to sneak out with us tonight?"

taehyung raised an eyebrow. "us?"

"we're all going out together, cause we're all allowed one night out," jimin said. "i asked them all what they thought about bringing you along and they thought it was a cool idea."

"you're going to help me sneak out?"

"yeah, it's easy," jimin said. "just jump out the window and we'll catch you."

taehyung nearly jumped out of his seat, eyes widening. "are you fucking kidding me? i thought you'd dress me up and run out with me or some shit."

"that's too fucking mainstream," jimin argued. "let's do some daredevil parkour shit."

"yeah, it would sound like a hell of a fun ride if it wasn't my life being put at risk."

jimin smiled, putting his chin on taehyung's knees. "so, are you in?"

taehyung nodded, grinning back.

he was going to do something fun for once; maybe he would be able to enjoy a few hours of his life before he died.

"i'm in."

* * *

at eight'o'clock, the six boys left the house, waving goodbye to taehyung and bogum.

taehyung left to the second floor saying that he was going to wash up and go to bed early, and bogum let him go with absolutely no suspicion. once in his room, taehyung put on a heavy sweatshirt and sat by his window waiting for one of the other boys to send him a signal.

a flashlight flashed outside, three times.

taehyung smiled to himself and opened his window, shivering as the cold air hit him. he looked down from his window and bit his lip, the idea of jumping out of a second floor window finally dawning on him.

up ahead, snow lightly dusted trees and rooftops, and cars whizzed down the road one by one. the night was dark, slowly swallowing up everything in its path like an invasive parasite, devouring the light and colors that the sun spit out from its rays of light. taehyung looked down again, the flashlight blinking twice: the signal for him to jump.

cold air blew his hair across his face, and he shivered again, hearing his heart beating incredibly quickly against his ribcage.

"i'm scared!" he called down.

"we'll get you! just jump!" jungkook called back.

"at most you'll only break a leg!" jimin added.

"oh fuck you," taehyung muttered under his breath, lifting one leg up onto the windowsill. he leaned forward slightly, testing the waters.

slowly, he brought his other leg up, turning his body so that he faced his bedroom. he held tightly onto the window, bringing each leg, one by one, onto what felt like the window below him.

"i'm going to jump! trust fall?"

"we're ready!" seokjin yelled. "just fall when you're ready, but count down from three first!"

taehyung took a deep breath, fingers already icy cold from the biting wind.

"three! two!" he paused, looking back at his room: at the clothes that once fit him perfectly now messily sewn tighter to fit his emaciated body laying on the floor, at the three books that he read over and over again, highlighting and underlining the same few quotes repeatedly until they remained branded into his heart... he looked away. "one!"

he fell, and the air was harsh and cold, biting at his fingertips as he fell and ripping through his clothing like a rabid wolf. he almost yelled out, suddenly unsure and afraid that the boys underneath wouldn't manage to catch him.

he hit three pairs of arms, and one of them tumbled with him as they lost balance. taehyung fell on top of him and rolled straight off. he opened his eyes, shut in fear and anxiety, meeting gazes with jimin.

immediately, jimin smiled.

taehyung smiled back, suddenly feeling free and liberated; he was no longer in the confines of the treatment home.

"ready to go?"

jimin stood up, reaching out a hand for taehyung to hold.

"ready as i'll ever be."

taehyung grinned at the others that stood waiting.

"up the road?" taehyung asked.

"up the road," namjoon repeated.

they ran then, up the road, opposite the places that were familiar to them. they ran past trees and cars, stepping through a thin layer of snow that covered the ground. the night was dark and invasive, but they were bright, and light is always stronger than the dark.

as they ran, laughing and talking loudly, taehyung's thoughts went elsewhere. he thought about his family, how he was nothing but a burden to them, nothing but a chore for them. he remembered the way his parents would look at him, with disappointment written all over their faces, the hatred they had for him skillfully hidden but still visible to the boy they hated so much.

he then turned to look at jimin, who smiled at him as he ran.

jimin, jungkook, yoongi, namjoon, hoseok, seokjin... they were all just like him. subtle differences made them different people, but the not so subtle similarities brought them together.

taehyung then slowed to a stop as he took in his surroundings.

the others stopped with him, breathing heavily.

around them was a dark, vacant field with a single lone tree in the midst of it all.

the road sat as a barrier between the field and a few large hills. taehyung wandered into the field, the darkness making it eerie but at the same time welcoming. he ran his fingers over the rough bark of the tree.

"why is it all alone?"

everything about the tree seemed lonely, from the bare branches as a result of the winter eating away at its leaves, to its lone location in an empty field.

"it's like us," namjoon said, quietly. he smiled a bitter smile. "alone."

"but we're not alone anymore, are we?" hoseok said. "we've got each other now. we're all a little sick and we're all kind of dying, but we've got each other."

"thought i was jealous of a tree just a few days ago," jimin said. "but this ones not all that different from us, huh?"

taehyung sat down, exhaustion eating away at his lungs. "fuck, forgot i haven't eaten in like, a week," he scoffed. "i ran a little too fast."

jimin laughed knowingly. "anorexia sucks ass."

they all sat down then, leaning against the tree or laying in the lightly frosted grass. it was still so dark and so quiet; the only evidence of life in the field was the dead tree and the dying boys.

"when i die... there's a little box under my bed," yoongi said. "can you bury that here? that way, the tree won't be alone anymore."

taehyung's heart lurched, and he could imagine that the hearts of the other boys did the same.

"when you die?" seokjin asked. "you're going to die?"

yoongi smiled, sadness hidden beneath the gesture of joy. "soon."

"you want to be free, yeah?" taehyung asked.

"yeah."

silence resonated between them all, like the sound of mourning after the death of a loved one.

a/n: [may or may not delete this horribly depressing author's note depending on how things go]

so i might consider taking a quick break from this story.

first off, school has literally been killing me lmao. it's never been so stressful and my winter break is nearly over and it honestly just sounds like such a daunting task oml :,-)))

also, my mental health has been taking a turn for the worse lol. my eating habits have been all over the place and i've just been really unstable recently; there were so many triggering situations lately and it's all been hitting me at once lmao. it's the new year now - 2018 - and i can't even find it in myself to hope for a good year at this point.

usually writing is my emotional outlet and shit, but i've literally lost all my will to live right now haha-- if my updates get slower i really hope you understand; i'll try to keep up with this story as much as i can!! this is just an fyi kind of thing, so whether i take a break or not all depends on how i'm feeling for the next few weeks.

thanks for reading this story regardless and i'll hopefully be back with another update soon!!