Chapter 18
The whole apartment fell silent. Save for the odd dialogue Hiro would mumble as he plays with his toys, but they were faint. Everything around me swirled together, merging with one another as I look around, scrunching my eyes shut as my head feels light. I could pass out in any second, but I couldn't bring my self to do that. My whole body felt numb. My hands shaking by my sides as I cocoon myself in the blue blanket I found laying on the floor, a huge stain occupying the corner of it.
I hadn't felt like this since the news of Toya 'supposedly' dying...
My heart hammering in my chest, threatening to break out of my chest in a matter of seconds. My hands beginning to feel clammy. My eyes staring at the dark abyss of the television screen. My breathing choked and ragged. My whole body shook in complete fear, my bottom lip quivering the more I stared at the blank screen of the tv. My ears felt numb. My nails digging into the blanket the more and more I thought about it.
The betrayal. The lies. He knew. He had to know. Dabi had to know. And he never said anything to me! How could I continue to trust him if he still pulled shit like this?
The thought of my father laying in a hospital, close to death, losing his quirk, all lonely, worried about me and Hiro. Having his whole career ripped away from him like it didn't even matter. I wasn't there. I couldn't be there for him. It didn't matter to me that he wasn't there for me when I needed him the most... but he needed me more than ever... I couldn't just let him stew in his own sadness. He must be crushed. He needed me. My dad needed me and I'm not there for him...
This was a mistake. I should have left when I had the chance. I grew too attached. Once again, my feelings are what gets caught in all this mess. I get caught in this mess. Hiro doesn't deserve any of this. I should have escaped. I shouldn't have been so hung up on him and just dated Keigo... Ran away without looking back with Hiro in my arms.
At least then, I could be there for my father and not feel like utter shit... Then I wouldn't be the one hurt in all of this.
It's selfish but... what could I do?
The sound of the front door opening catches me off guard. My whole body jumping gently as it's shut rather violently. The sound of boots being kicked off sounded so close yet so far away. Hanging his leather jacket up on the hook before I heard his feet patter into the living room.
I couldn't even bring myself to look at him...
"Hey, babe, I thought we could order — Hey... what's wrong? What's happened?" He asks, instantly by my side, trying to pull me into him but sighs as I push him away, yanking the blanket away from me as I storm away from him, my eyes focused on the small cracks in wall, not even giving him the satisfaction of looking toward him, "Babe, what's going on?"
I couldn't even respond to him, my heart pounding into my rib cage even quicker than ever. My breath beginning to grow quicker as I dig my nails into my palms, my arms shaking as he stands by the couch. Staring at me. I couldn't look at him. I couldn't speak to him. I couldn't do anything...
"Babe, talk to me," Dabi speaks up, his voice cutting through silence like a knife through butter, my eyes scrunching tightly as I try to ignore him, "(Y/n), what's going on?"
What could I say? What could I do? My head pounding. My heart aching. My throat tightening. My whole body beginning to feel numb. I couldn't let that push me down. I couldn't be the weak one here! I couldn't! I have to be strong! I need to be there for my father no matter what!
"Don't make me ask again, baby," Dabi groans, trying to follow me, his voice close to breaking, this was killing me, I couldn't do this, "Please... what's going on?"
But I had to do this if I had any chance of seeing if my dad was okay?
"Did you know?..." I ask, the question coming out more like a whisper, my nails digging into my elbows as I blink back tears at the silent response, "Well?..."
"Know what? Babe, you're not making any sense, just talk to me," Dabi groans, walking over to me before staring at me wide eyed as I push him away again, shaking my head, "(Y/n), what is going on? Where's Hiro?"
"Did you know?" I ask again, avoiding eye contact with him, choking back a sob as I try and get as far away as possible from him, scrunching my eyes shut, biting my lip as tears roll down my cheeks.
"I don't know what you're on about, doll, just talk to me," Dabi groans, chasing after me, wrapping his arms around my waist tightly, ignoring my feeble attempts at pushing him away, my heart breaking as I let out a loud, gut wrenching sob, helplessly thrashing in his arms, "Whats wrong?! Babe, look at me!"
"Let go of me!" I cry, pushing at him with more urgency, sobbing again as he refuses to do as I say, my nails digging into his scars, hoping he'd retract but he even ignores it as blood begins to pour from the crescent shaped dents, "Dabi! Let go!"
"Not until you tell me what's going on! What's happened? Where's Hiro?" He asks, wincing as I scratch at his hands, his staples pulling however he still keeps his grip iron tight, burying his head into my shoulder as I wriggle, "Talk to me, please, what's going on?"
"My dad! Did you know?!" I shout, taking a shaky breath as he freezes, his hands growing loose around my waist making it easy for me to wrench myself out of his grip and stare at him, "Well?! Did you?! And don't lie to me!"
"(Y/n), I —" he begins but cuts himself off, he stares back at me, ignoring the blood running down his arm, my head spinning, "Babe —"
"Don't avoid the question! You either do or you don't!" I shoot back, trying to calm my nerves down however they kept spiking, "Toya! Answer me now!"
"Yes! I did! I knew! I was there!" He shouts back, his hands curling into shaking fists as he stares at me, gulping as his voice begins to break, "I knew..."
"O — oh my god..." I whimper, running my hand through my hair shaking my head as I laugh quite bitterly toward him, "Oh my god..."
"Babe, I swear, I was going to tell you," Dabi hums, following me as I storm into our bedroom, grabbing the duffel bag, having enough, "Babe! Please! I was going to tell you! You have to believe —"
"What?! How can I trust you?!" I shout, grabbing my clothes, shoving them into the duffel bag, ignoring him pulling the clothes back out, "You left me on my own for four years! I thought you were dead! But no, you were getting your jollies off being a villain!"
"Babe! I was not — for gods sake! Will you just stop for one second?!" Dabi growls, grabbing a hold of my wrists and pinning me against the wall, his grip tightening as I wriggle, his knees holding my legs down to prevent me from kicking him in his jewels, "Listen to me! I didn't want any of this to happen! You think I wanted to leave you! It killed me every day, I wanted to come running back to you but I couldn't! I love you! Why would I hurt you?"
"I don't know..." I reply, glaring toward him, tensing up as he sighs, "But you keep hurting me whether it's intentional or not and I keep getting clobbered... I can't do this! I have to see my dad!"
"Babe, please don't say that," Dabi groans, leaning his head back, looking up at the ceiling while I struggle, "Babe, just calm down,"
"Calm down?" I ask, chuckling bittersweetly, shaking my head as I look toward our feet, biting my lip, "You lied to me, what else are you going to keep from me? Huh? You want this to work out so much, and I do too, but you keep ruining my trust for you..."
"It was just this thing, I was going to tell you, I swear," Dabi says, staring at me, cupping my cheek before sighing as I yank my head away from him, "Stay..."
"No," I reply simply, shaking my head as I stare up at him, his grip loosening as I push him away going back to grabbing my clothes and packing it away.
"Please don't do this! I said I was sorry!" Dabi groans, trying to grab me again but gasps as I throw my hand out push him against the wall with my quirk, keeping him in place, "Babe! Stop this!"
"Right. You listen to me, now," I reply, glaring toward him as I cross my arms, ignoring his puppy eyes, "I am not you and my father is not your father! I love my dad more than anything in the world, yes he wasn't there for me but he always came when it mattered most. He's the number one hero and always will be in my eyes, he didn't lost his shit when I told him he had a grandchild, he was over the moon and didn't ask any questions about it. He loves me with his whole being. We lost my mother... he lost the love of his life yet he still went out there with a smile! He could have yelled at me, abused me, kicked me, blame me for losing mom but he didn't!
He saved more people than people could ever imagine. Yes, he wasn't there at any school meetings or at my prom and maybe he wasn't there when I was pregnant and in labor, but I still love him and he's my dad. Not everyone hates their dad like you do, Toya. I have to see him, I have too. He thinks he's lost me and Hiro, he's lost everything... can't you understand where I'm coming from? Please, just understand... I can't lose my dad... I just got him back and he's finally being there for me... that's all I want from him and he's working for it... I have to be there for him... please..."
Sighing softly, I release my hold on him, letting him crumple to the floor as I sink into the bed, wiping the tears that couldn't stop sliding down my cheeks. Sniffling softly. Dabi sighs, wrapping his arms around me tightly, letting me break down in his arms. The male rocking me to and fro, pressing a soft kiss to my head.
"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry..." Dabi murmurs into my hair, rocking us, kissing my forehead as I look up at him, "I... I didn't mean... I'm sorry..."
"I'm sorry for losing it... I shouldn't have blamed you for it... it's not your fault my father lost his quirk," I hum, wrapping my arms around his neck, burying my face into his neck, snuggling into him with a small sob before giggling half heartedly, "We really are a mess, aren't we?..."
"Well, you're a hero... I'm a villain," Dabi hums, kissing my nose gently with a sigh, "It's as dysfunctional as fuck..."
"Then why don't you come with me?" I ask looking up at him, wiping my eyes with a small hum, leaning my head on his shoulder, "We could actually be a couple..."
"You know I can't do that, babe..." Dabi hums with a sigh, holding me tightly to him as I slowly calm down, "I kidnapped you and Hiro for starters, you really think your father would forgive me for that? As soon as I come out, I'll be arrested..."
"Oh right..." I hum, looking down at my lap, sniffling softly, "I'm sorry..."
"I know babe, it's okay," Dabi says softly, sighing as he peppers kisses over my head, "You can go... I know how important this is for you, I'll get Keigo to take you home so it looks like he saved you... but can I ask you a huge favour?"
"What is it? Anything you want, I'll do it," I hum, looking up at him with a small smile.
"Stay with me for one more day,"...
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