In his room, with the door shut Mikey finally felt like he could breathe again. Her presence made him anxious, but he did his best to hide it. He didn't want her to feel unwanted but at the same time he wasn't sure if he wanted her there. God I hope this is the right choice.  He loosened his black tie and undid his top buttons. He still couldn't believe she was here. Laying on his bed he reflected on the day and how he tried to stay away from home as long as possible. 

He went out after work with Cheyenne and Jamaal and though he enjoyed spending time with them. He couldn't help but feel as if he was lying to Cheyenne. Will she still like me when I tell her the truth? When am I going to tell her the truth? Should I wait till Chrissy leaves? I need to pray about this. With his mind set, he closed his eyes and whispered a silent prayer to God, asking him for guidance and direction. After which he delved into the work he had for the week.

The job was getting even more demanding even though it has only been a little bit over a month. He got his first solo project, a design for a three bedroom dwelling for a family in Daytona. He was the first of the three to get a solo project. He shared the news with Cheyenne and she seemed genuinely happy for him. After going through the client profile he starts the preliminary sketches that he needs to present in the morning. An hour has passed and he heard Chrissy closing what sounded like her bedroom door. He gets up to check on her but his phone buzzes signalling an incoming text. 

Cheyenne: Thinking about you. 

This makes Mikey smile.

Mikey: Oh yea. What did I do now?

Cheyenne: LOL. Nothing. I had a good time this evening. I hope we can do it again soon.

Mikey: I don't think I can handle Jamaal for more than 8 hours a day.

Cheyenne: Lol well maybe just the two of us Friday?

Mikey thinks about it a beat. 

Mikey: Are you asking me out?

Cheyenne: Yes and if you were smart you would say yes.

Mikey chuckles to himself.

Mikey: Yes, but... I have Jonathan's wedding anniversary party on Friday.

Cheyenne: Oh, well it doesn't have to be Friday. 

He contemplates inviting her to the party, but that will be too soon. And Chrissy might be there.

Mikey: Okay, I will make a plan for us.

Cheyenne: Okay I have to go now. Late night two for one movie with Kim. Good night.

Mikey: Goodnight. Be safe.

She asked me out? What? Mikey couldn't help the excitement that bubbled within him. He got up and looked at himself in the mirror. He was smiling. He touched his cheeks to see if it was real. This girl has me smiling. He thought to himself. He decides he has done enough work for the night and decides to go take a shower. He heard Chrissy go into her room so the bathroom should be free.

In the shower he begins to lather himself. He has some reggae music playing in the background, the one drop rhythm reminding him of his father's homeland. He starts to sing along to the Taurus Riley song "She's royal yea, so royal" with images of Cheyenne flashing through his mind.

" I forgot how well you could sing".

Mikey is startled by the voice and peeps from behind the shower curtain to see Chrissy. She is basically naked in a white lacy bra and black panties, with the pieces of clothing she was wearing before on the floor.

"Chrissy what are you doing?" he asked trying to keep his focus at eye level. She smiled at him obviously recognizing his struggle.

"I just thought I would join you". She reached behind her to unhook her bra and he stops her by holding his hand up.

"No". He turns off the shower.

" No? why not?" She asks in a seductive tone a few octaves deeper than her usual voice.

" I ... uh.. I am not ready for this. You just broke up with him. I don't know why. I don't know if us getting back together is the right thing. I know sex isn't the right thing"

" Matt is a jerk and I just wanted to show you how much I appreciate you" she says stepping closer and unclasping her bra. He still tried to maintain eye contact with her.

"No Chrissy this is not right" He reaches for his towel and wrapped it around his waist to shield his growing erection. She steps into the bathtub and he is still covered in soap suds. She is now bra-less and inches away from from him. 

"Chrissy stop!" He commands, his back against the faucet causing it to turn on the shower once more, making her wet. 

" Stop me." She whispers as her wet breasts press against him. Her nipples are already hard due to the cold water. He looks down at her and before he could stop her, she kisses him softly on the lips.

He tries to stop her, to say no but he could only manage a moan. This seems to edge her on as the kiss became more forceful. Her hands start to explore his slippery body. Running up his arms, down his chest and hooking into the section where the towel is tied around his waist. Before she could tug it off, he catches her hand. Pulling it up to his chest then gently pushing her off him breaking the connection. 

"That was a mistake. You staying here was a mistake. I don't now what you are trying to do but I am not doing that" He says looking her dead in the eyes.

She stared up at him, lost for words. "I uh, i'm sorry" she says her voice cracking. " I'll uh, I'll leave". She steps out of the shower and gathers her clothes from off of the floor. Mikey waits until he hears the door close and lets out a heavy sigh. "Holy, shhh, what the... holy.." he curses to himself. 

He couldn't believe what just happened. What almost happened.

.....

 He finishes his shower a minute later. After getting dressed in the safety of his room. He decides to go check on Chrissy across the hall. He finds her dressed and crying as she packs her bag. Why did she have to be crying?  

"Hey what are you doing?" He asks standing in the doorway.

"What does it look like I'm doing? I'm leaving because clearly you don't want me here" She says not bothering to look up at him.

" I don't want you to leave. You can stay but, we can't do that. I am not ready for it" He says crossing his arms.

" Why not Mikey?" she whines. "I've apologized over and over. Matt and I are over. I love you and I know you love me so why can't we just ...."

"Look I don't know what you expect me to say alright. I am not ready for that." She looks up at him with tear filled eyes.

" Well you won't have to worry about me anymore." She says throwing her bag over her shoulder and walking towards the door.

" Where are you going to go?" He asked blocking her path

"Somewhere where I am wanted" She says  "Now move". She pushes past him and makes her way down the hallway into the living room.

" It's night. You have no where to go Chrissy. You can stay here".

" And why should I?" She asks spinning around to face him.

"Because I still love you" He says without thinking. She drops her bag and rushed towards him throwing her arms around his neck placing a kiss on his cheek. 

"I know you do". What have I done? He asked himself, realizing the implications of his words. Maybe I do still love her, but I don't know what to do. God what have I done?

.... 

What a difficult couple of days it was Mikey thinks as he journeyed home on the bus. He couldn't help but feel like a liar. Everyday at work, he and Cheyenne would go out and have lunch, maybe share a kiss in the file room. In fact things got a little heated today. Things started the way they usually did with her leaning against the copy machine. He would reach around her trying to grab the papers from the machine. Then she'd casually place her arms around his neck. They'd look each other in the eyes and then he'd look down a her lips before they met.

Today, however the kiss turned into a semi make-out session. Her body was pressed up against his, with her legs almost wrapped around his waist. He almost got lost in her before he pulled himself away. He knew that if they went too far, he couldn't turn back. Cheyenne was oddly confused by the move. 

"Why are you stopping?" She asked with furrowed brows. She was so cute.

" We shouldn't do this here.  We should go slow".

"Um yea ok.. slow. You are moving real slow though with the thing you promised you would explain to me".

That took Mikey down  like an unexpected  uppercut in a boxing match. She hadn't breathed a word about what they had talked about after lunch with Johny. But now she brought it up with his arms around her waist, her lips swollen from their kiss and her top button undone. Could she look any sexier? 

"Things are a little complicated right now. But I promise I can explain everything soon". He recalls saying to her.

She didn't understand why he couldn't explain it. But the truth is Mikey didn't understand what was going on in his life. He was living in the moment for the most part which only made the hole he was falling in a lot deeper. 

How do I crawl out of this hole ? He ponders as he departs the bus at his stop across the way from his apartment building. In the elevator he wonders if Chrissy is still there. She is supposed to leave today to stay with her mother. While he lip locked with Cheyenne in the days, in the evenings he would come home to a home cooked meal and a cheery Chrissy. The residual effects of his words from that night lingered in the air. While they never talked about it, you could see it in the way she looked at him. She was starry eyed and caught up on the dream that they would one day get back together. Mikey on the other hand was still unsure of why he said it. Every night he'd pray for a sign to show him the right direction. But was he really looking for those signs? Was he enjoying the double life?

The questions roll through his mind as he opens his door and finds an empty apartment. He calls out but no one answers. He checks her room, her bag is still there. She isn't packed yet. He walks to the kitchen to check if she cooked. There is no food prepared but there is a note held up by tape on the refrigerator door. It read "Hey went to the pharmacy. I'm buying pizza for dinner."

Okay. He thinks to himself. He decides to shower before she gets home and lays in bed for a quick nap. 

An hour later, Mikey is awoken by his phone ringing. It's Cheyenne. He answers on the fourth ring. 

"Hello" he says groggily. 

"Hey you" she replies. 

"Hold on" he whispers. Mikey looks at his watch to check the time. It's 7:13. Is Chrissy back yet?He peaks outside and sees a pizza box on the coffee table. Down the hall he hears, her rummaging in the bathroom. He re enters his room and closes the door quietly behind him. 

"You okay?" she asked.

"Uh, yea. I was just sleeping". 

"Oh sorry, should I call back?" 

"No no its fine. I needed to wake up"

"Oh okay. So things happened today"

"Yea they did..."

They start to talk about the events of the week. Everything from work to heated make-out sessions. He tried to avoid any conversation about what he isn't telling her her about Chrissy. But she kept insisting that they meet outside of work to talk. He caved, he promised her that he will arrange a date and a time that he will definitely explain everything. He promised her. 

" I like you a lot Cheyenne. I really do. Just trust me ok." he said

Before she could reply there was a knock at his bedroom door. Then Chrissy walked in. She was smiling but her eyes were watery as if she was about to cry.

"Um, I have to go." He hung up on her.