Author: sundjerbob336

Title: 4/5 - The title is sort of obscure and has a sense of mystery surrounding it. This is really good because then I would be tempted to click on it to find out who the 'Archers' are.

Cover: 2/5 - Firstly, the cover doesn't have the title of your book on it like covers are supposed to. Secondly, if I saw this image, I would never guess it was a romance story. Maybe think about creating a cover that reflects your genre so potential readers can instantly know what genre your story is from just looking at it. You can check out the Multimedia thread for some help. Some people have crazy talent there - I got all my covers made from there and I think they are hella good.

Synopsis: 3/5 - It's interesting enough. I instantly know that your MC is called Mia and has a mafia family. She meets a man that is (am I to assume) scary. But I feel like it's lacking a little something. Maybe it's the wording? I don't know, but I feel like this could be written better. You have an extra space betweet 'famiglia' and the comma so think about removing that.

Plot: 5/5 - The beginning scene was absolutely amazing, I was glad it was a dream though. She's too funny to die. Everything you added here was relevant and linked on to something else which gave your story a nice flow.

Characters: 5/5 - Your MC's voice is hilarious and fresh. I love her interaction with her best friend and the recounts of when she was babysitting her children.

SPG: 2/5 - Basically, I give up. There are too many mistakes for me to point out. But I did a few. Anyways, maybe you should either proofread it yourself (out loud, that usually helps me) or get an editor. Just a heads up, some editors tend to change your writing style when they edit. Please, if you ask someone, make sure your story retains its humor. I love it.

-Most people don't like it when CAPS is used in text. As you are using Italics for the beginning, maybe think about just writing the word normally.

-You have extra spaces all over the place which is sometimes quite distracting. But a good proofread should help clear that up for you.

-'Unless he lets me go' not 'let's' Le me explain why; let's is let and is put together. In other words' Unless he let is me go' makes absolutely no sense.

-'Dinosaurs' not 'dynosaurs'

-'Abs' not 'abbs'

-'Piece of pie' not 'peace'

OVERALL: I love the title of the chapter and the image you have. It brought a smile to my face. This freaking cracked me up. Honestly, I loved it, mistakes aside, I think this is one of the funniest, best stories on wattpad. Never give up on this. It's literally a diamond in the rough and I feel so privileged that I got to read this.

WOULD I RECOMMEND: HELL YEAH!

TOTAL RATING: 21/30