Author: Sci_High

Title: 5/5 - It has a nice ring to it. A very interesting title choice.

Cover: 3/5 - I'm not a huge fan of your cover. It's okay but I think there is definitely room for improvement.

Synopsis: 4/5 - Quite intriguing, it grabs my attention and makes me want to read on.

Plot: 3/5 - I loved the whole stalking and killing part. I think that part of the plot was written beautifully. I also enjoyed the flashback into Michael's past and how he was drafted into the guild. However I feel that it would have been enough if you ended the chapter there. I felt like you had way too much going on in your first chapter so it kinda got confusing at times. It was quite lengthy but what you wrote did captivate my attention but I think it would have made me want to read on more if it was a tad shorter and the chapter ended after the flashback. Then again, it's just my opinion.

Characters: 4/5 - I kind of like Michael. He seems a little rough around the edges with a troubled past that sorta makes him likeable. (Dunno what that says about me considering the fact that he just murdered a woman by snapping her neck) I find Fred a little meh as a character. He seems like the stereotypical blond haired guy that gets all the attention from girls and I feel like he is a little bit of a cut out character, not fully developed.

SPG: 4/5 - Sometimes the phrasing of your sentences were off and they sounded a little choppy but it's nothing a good proofreading can't fix. For example, 'the streetS at night WERE not safe' or 'the streeT at night WAS not safe'. See what I did there? However, overall I liked your style and I did want to read on so the minor mistakes were not a problem so props to you.

OVERALL: It was a good first chapter but I think it needs a little work here and there, nothing major. Also, maybe try shortening it by splitting it in half or something because I felt like too much was going on at one time and we were just getting to know your characters. Little misconception: If the woman was walking towards Michael, how could he tail her and walk a few feet behind?

WOULD I RECOMMEND: YES

TOTAL RATING: 23/30