Author: JordenLeonard

Title: 4/5 - Interesting choice. I don't think it makes much sense though. That works well for you in the sense that I would want to know more about this odd title.

Cover: 4/5 - It's really plain with only a tree and the sky but for some reason I think it looks good.

Synopsis: 2/5 - I don't think it makes a lot of sense, maybe because you are missing some commas. It's also really short and doesn't engage me at all. Try adding a little more information, drag your readers in. This is the first thing they will see, might as well blow them away, right?

Plot: 4/5 - Less dialogue and more explaining would definitely help slow the pace down and make it a tad more engaging. Bring the world to life using descriptions, your characters don't need to be the ones doing the explaining.

You kind of lost me in the middle because there was just way too much confusing terminology and for me, I just couldn't read on. Having said that, the ending with the prince was amazing, and that was the perfect what to finish the chapter.

I did like the joke at the end. Nice bit of humor thrown in.

Characters: 5/5 - You have good characters here. Very original and unique names.

SPG: 5/5 - Really good! Sometimes the phrasing of your sentences were a tad odd and you are missing some commas here and there, but for the most part, it was flawless.

-Alters? I don't think this is the right word. Ambles, maybe?

OVERALL: I wouldn't read this story mainly because it isn't my style. Having said that, I've read enough books to spot a diamond in the rough, and boy is this one. It's not everyone's cup of tea but honestly, the amount of time and effort you've put into this story really shines though. You've created a whole new world, and a magical one too. There were some clumsy sentences but that's all normal, a good proofread should help you there

WOULD I RECOMMEND: YES

TOTAL RATING: 24/30