I came home with a burdened heart, swollen eyes, and bleeding skin. The loneliness inside my house triggered my sadness even more. I fell onto my knees and bawled my eyes out loudly.

The pain when you're all alone is unbearable. It felt like darkness itself was embracing me tightly. Squeezing every tear I have left in me. I'm too blinded by love that I got fooled.

I'm stupid.

Stupid enough to think that Jimin would easily let go of the past, that he would really care for him if I showed him how much I've changed.

Tonight, I silently pray that I'll be able to sleep this heartache away. Whether it takes years for my heart to feel peace again, I'd gladly accept the consequence.

=====

The knocks on the front door in the living area woke me up. My eyes automatically scanned the wall clock, and it says one in the afternoon.

I jumped out from the couch and took a peek of my visitor on the peephole. Internally, I sighed as I saw Yoongi patiently standing outside.

I opened the door quickly and hugged him tightly. It caught him by surprise, especially when I began to cry. "Woah, what's going on?" He gently asked.

Pulling away from the embrace, I wiped my tears and forced a laugh. "I'm sorry, I just needed one."

"You look..." He can't seem to find a pleasant word to describe my current appearance.

"Like a mess? Deserted?" I slightly chuckled. "I'll just fix myself, uhm, can you wait for a minute or two in the living room?"

"Yeah... sure," He looked so dumbfounded about my situation, and I bet that he'll be asking questions later.

As I welcomed him inside my house, he sat on the couch. I immediately ran upstairs to my room and head straight to my bathroom.

I was too tired last night to even think about my physical state. My own blood dried on my skin, my hair is like a bird's nest, and the bags under my eyes looked so heavy already.

It didn't take long after I finished. I don't have the audacity to make Yoongi wait too much. Once I got back, I saw his fingers fidgeting on his phone. "Do you like anything? I'll cook," I offered.

"No, we have to talk," He said, his eyes are focused on his phone.

"About?"

"I need an answer, about you, going with me," Right at that moment, he genuinely stared at my eyes to convince me.

Not this again. I mentally scratched the back of my head. "Yoongi, I don't want to," I firmly stated.

"Looks like you need to," He leaned back comfortably on the couch, eyeing me from head to toe.

"I don't," A part of me still believes that Jimin and I will fix whatever argument we have right now. But the bigger part tells me to just run away and forget his tempting face.

"That's not final," He said. "You're going to say yes, eventually."

"No, stop assuming that," I almost scoffed. "Yoongi, if this is what you're here for, please not now. I'm too tired."

"I know you looked like it." I took a deep breath and poked the inside of my cheek using my tongue. "What happened?" Yoongi asked.

"Jimin..." I began. "He, uhm, cheated on me."

"Wait," Upon hearing, he sits straight and is more eager to hear more. "How?"

"He fucked his former assistant," I tried my best not to get all teary-eyed again. "Or his current assistant. I don't really know," I added.

"Oh, you mean that Cami girl?" He asked, confused.

"Yeah, you know her?" I played with my fingernails to somehow divert my attention. My resistance to this topic is slowly breaking, and I don't want to look like a mess' in front of Yoongi again.

"Not personally. Jimin once told me about her," Is all he said. I wanted to learn more about that, but I can't trigger myself, not now that I'm already having a hard time controlling my emotions because of the topic of our conversation.

"What about the baby?" I stopped whatever diversions I'm doing. His question caught my attention.

Suddenly, I placed my hand on my belly as I thought about the question that hadn't entered my mind. To think of it, I haven't eaten anything for today. I don't feel like it. But I know that it'll be bad for my baby.

I sit at my place and go through an internal dilemma. "Did you tell him about it?"

Absentmindedly, I shook my head 'no' to his question. "He called my ba-by 'gross'," My voice trembled. "That piece of shit," I hissed under my breath.

That's when an idea struck me. Didn't I say I'd do anything for my heart to be at peace? Then what if Yoongi's offer is the solution to my problems right now? It'll be the biggest diversion for myself that I could think of.

Besides, if Jimin really loves me and that he regrets what he just did to me. He'll come for me. About my parents, they're going to support whatever decision I make. I believe it's about time that they think of me as an adult when it comes to life-changing decisions.

I know I'm being irrational, but I'm also considering my baby here too. If I'd live in a stress-free place, my baby will be healthy.

It all comes down to me. I just need to make a decision. At least, right now, I have a reason to consider Yoongi's offer. Consider? Scratch that, I'm going to answer his question now.

"Hey, you told me you'd stay in Japan for a year, right?" I inquired. At least this is off the topic from earlier. He nods his head. "You're not planning to stay longer than that?"

"No, why? Do you want to?" He asked back.

"I was just curious. How about we just stay for nine months?" I bartered.

"Hold up, 'we'?" He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Yeah... you, me, and my baby." A smile slowly crept onto his face, and I rolled my eyes. "I was thinking about a better environment for him."

"Him? Is this a surprise gender reveal?" He laughed, and I smiled.

"No, I want a boy. I hope," I silently mutter the last two words. "So, what can you say? I'd just stay there; however, I want to, how long I want to."

"What if Jimin comes and gets you?"

Like a fool of me, I answered, "Then I'll come back with him."

"What if he didn't?"

"I don't think so," I said. "He'll come for me," Despite what he has done to me, I'm putting my faith on him. If I had the courage to change and prove myself to him genuinely, I believe it's possible for him to have the same initiative. "So when's the flight again?"

"You still have two days to say goodbye..."