everybody's watching her
but she's looking at you

It was the night of the ball. Nicollette was anxious. She'd been to a few balls here and there, yeah, and not to mention all of the social events leading up to this. But this ball? It seemed... more important than the others. She didn't know why. Maybe it was because of the fact that this was her first official date with a boy - a Prince, at that. Perhaps it was the fact that everyone in Aradia and the towns surrounding it who were of any sort of importance would be there. That meant all of the Princes, Princesses, Dukes, Nobles, etc. Anyone who had any sort of importance to royalty or had the money or fame in their kingdoms was invited. It was being held away from the Sutcliffe residence, which was different than what Nicollette was used to.

Usually, when there was a social event or something she had to dress up for, she'd put on a small ball gown and head from her house to the Sutcliffe mansion, where they held all of her balls (Not including the one held at Candice's mansion). This was somewhere she didn't really care to know the location of, in a giant building. She'd be riding with Tobias in his carriage to the event, arriving with him, and he'd be bringing her home at the end of the night.

If this were any girl from the town, they'd probably be excited. And sure, Nicollette had sort of gotten used to doing royal things, but she hadn't had to ever wear a gown this puffy and big. She felt ridiculous, and what made matters worse was the fact that it was pink.

Ever since she met Candice, she hadn't been able to wear pink. She felt too insecure, thinking it didn't fit her. But, because this was her first ball, her mother insisted on wearing the color to look like a princess. And as much as Nicollette tried to come up with excuse after excuse as to why she shouldn't wear that one, it just pushed her mother more toward the decision of making her wear it.

It was beautiful, for sure, but Nicollette wasn't sure if it was right for her. Pink and puffy, with intricate designs that glittered when she moved. Sparkles were in the fabric of the dress as well, so anytime any light would hit it - she sparkled. It was strapless, and so Malia and the other maid who did her hair and makeup took advantage of it. They covered her in sparkles, matching the aesthetic of her dress. They even sprayed some glitter in her hair once they finished curling it.

She felt like a disco ball. Yeah, she was gorgeous to anyone except for herself, but that didn't change the fact that she felt too shiny. The last thing she needed or wanted was to be the center of attention, and it seemed like that was exactly what Malia and the other servant had been going for.

Nicollette watched as Malia gently latched the diamond necklace around her neck. It was the one Tobias had gifted her weeks ago when she found out about Matthias and Candice being engaged. She hadn't worn it or even taken it out of the velvety box since receiving it, but she knew it made sense to wear it tonight since it was given to her in hopes of her going with Tobias, after all.

After Nicollette was ready to go, Malia led her out of her room and down into the main room of the Terilow house. Tobias was already there and waiting - right on time as he usually was. Estella chatted with him and Merlin, all three of them dressed accordingly for the giant ball. 

It had taken a while for Tobias to notice Nicollette's appearance, mostly because he was engaged in whatever Estella was saying. Merlin was the first to notice his daughter, his lips in the usual thin line. 

Although his daughter looked beautiful, it didn't change the fact that it didn't seem like Nicollette. It was obvious she was out of her comfort zone, but because she was acting the part, he didn't say anything on his end either.

Nicollette cleared her throat, and Tobias finally noticed her. He smiled a bright smile, "You look perfect." He bowed in greeting. She blushed, not used to the compliment, as she grabbed the sides of her dress, bowing slightly. 

"Thank you," Was the only thing she was able to muster out.

The boy nodded and held out his arm. "Shall we go?" Although it was a question, Nicollette knew that she didn't really have a choice. She linked her arm through his, letting him lead her out of her house and down the trail to the carriage.

She looked over at the Sutcliffe residence, but didn't see any activity. She didn't see Matthias, Maria, or even the King or Queen; the entire mansion seemed lifeless, as if it were just an empty house.

Tobias, lightly pulling on her arm, took her attention away from Matthias' house and back to reality. She sent him a sheepish smile before pulling herself into the carriage. Her dress took up most of the space, but Tobias had managed to climb in and into the seat across from her without stepping on the ends of it. She brushed at the sparkly fabric, her eyes on her fingers as silence rang through the small carriage.

"Beautiful weather for the royal ball," Tobias said. It was a clear attempt at small talk, to which Nicollette just pressed her lips together, nodding.

"Yeah. Yeah, it is." She managed to muster out.

She felt awkward. But then again, she always felt awkward around Tobias. She couldn't explain it, and she tried her hardest not to, but she did. He was always so prim and proper, the actual definition of a Prince. He didn't seem to have any sort of bone in his body that wasn't how the typical royal was raised. He always dressed up, used mannerisms and words that made him seem like he never let loose or had fun. It made Nicollette nervous, as if she was going to say or do the wrong thing and make him change his thoughts of her.

Of course, Nicollette had never been the type to care. She didn't care what people thought of her, and she made that very clear - that was why people like Ryker and Candice didn't like her. That's why royals thought she was self-entitled and snotty. She knew what people thought of her, and it had never really bothered her until recently. She didn't know why, but she was suddenly rewired into thinking she was always doing the wrong thing.

She wanted to tell herself it was because she was growing up. She was realizing her time was running out to find someone interested in her, and that she was beginning to see that her parents had been right all along. But truthfully, deep down, she knew she was a lot to deal with. It was bad enough to the point that Charles had gotten sick of her, and they were no longer friends. Of course, there was more to it than him just getting sick of her, but she could tell. She embarrassed him; she embarrassed everyone.

Nicollette didn't understand why she was suddenly hating on herself in the way she was, but she couldn't help it. She'd never been so confused about herself - who she was, what she wanted to be. She suddenly felt embarrassed, as if she wanted to be someone else - anyone else.

After being so caught up in her thoughts, she barely even registered when the carriage pulled up to where the royal ball was being held. Her nerves were on a whole new level. Her heart pounded in her chest, and she was thankful that Tobias somehow couldn't hear it. She fidgeted with her gloved fingers, watching as Tobias climbed over her and out of the carriage. 

Once he was out, she gripped the sides of her sparkly pink dress and slowly pulled herself up and out as well, careful not to wrinkle or rip her dress. Once she was fully out, Tobias shut the door, the blonde brushing herself off as if to rid it of any dust or dirt that might've gotten on it.

Tobias led the way, letting Nicollette trail behind. It seemed like it was the first time they'd ever done anything together where he didn't have his arm linked with hers. She didn't mind, using both of her hands to hold the sides of her dress up as she carefully followed behind him.

Everything inside was elegant. Even the entryway, the halls, and anywhere that nobody was. It was decorated beautifully, full of diamonds, sapphires, and other expensive gems. Nicollette felt as if she'd break something if she were to even look at it for too long, and so she looked ahead of her, chewing on the inside of her cheek as she and Tobias grew closer and closer to where the ball was held.

It was only when the door opened and dozens of people came into view that Nicollette felt her heart fall to her stomach. She knew that a lot of people would be present, but not this many. The room was gigantic, somehow fitting almost every important person she could think of. Even people she'd never met before lingered within the room, with all kinds of security and guards in case someone tried to come in.

"Holy shit," The sound of Zacharias' voice was heard.

Matthias glanced over, looking at his best friend. "What?"

Zacharias didn't say anything. He just pointed to the door. Tobias had just walked in, followed by someone who had definitely caught the attention of most - if not all - of the royals.

Matthias' heart stopped as he saw Nicollette walk in. He glanced around, seeing that everyone seemed to take in how she looked. Even Ryker had been silent, his brows raised as he took in the view. 

He looked back at the beautiful girl. His heart jumped as he saw that she wasn't paying any attention to anyone in the room except for him. 

She saw him. Not Ryker, not Tobias, none of the other royals who were staring at her. Her eyes were on Matthias, seeming to take him in the way he had taken the sight of her. 

Maybe Matthias was just crazy - hell, he probably was considering the thoughts he'd had lately. But something shifted in that moment between the two of them, as if the giant room full of people had simmered out until it was only them. 

But then Tobias grabbed Nicollette's arm and took her beautiful blue eyes away from him, breaking whatever had been happening. Her eyes danced toward the sandy-haired boy next to her, seeming to dull lightly as he gently tugged her toward a group of people standing by the door.

"Well," Ryker awkwardly said, clearing his throat to break the silence. "Maybe it's a good thing she's getting caught up in that Prince. He seems to be making her more of a lady." He adjusted his suit, acting as if he hadn't just said a backhanded compliment.

Matthias' eyes somehow managed to snap away from Nicollette and toward Ryker, but before he could say anything, Zacharias spoke up first.

"It's okay to admit she looks pretty, dude. Because... you know deep down she does." 

Ryker's cheeks reddened. He'd never been known to even look at Nicollette with a look other than disgust. Calling her pretty would mean hell froze over. But he glanced back at the girl in the pink dress, letting out a pained sigh as he faced the boys again. "Okay, fine." He said. "She looks... good. Royal."

Matthias' jaw clenched. He clenched it so hard, it almost seemed like his teeth would snap. He didn't know what was worse - Ryker treating Nicollette so horribly that she'd broken down that day, or Ryker complimenting her.

Before Matthias or even anyone could react, a slow song echoed through the giant ballroom. Candice was on him in an instant, grabbing him and tugging him to the middle of the dance floor. 

He'd almost forgotten about the blonde. Then again, he didn't care to try and remember her, either. Despite having the beauty standing in front of him, his eyes continued to bounce to wherever Nicollette was. 

She was also on the dancefloor, though she was dancing with Tobias. She looked awkward, almost... uncomfortable, even. Matthias hated seeing her like this - because he knew more than probably anyone else here that Nicollette didn't want to do this. She didn't want to be here, and he was starting to wish he wasn't either.

"You're awfully distracted today," Candice said, catching Matthias' attention. 

Matthias tore his eyes away from Nicollette, looking down at Candice. "I am." He admitted.

"Is there a particular reason? It's quite embarrassing to have my husband-to-be meddling with his friends instead of greeting everyone with me." Candice said. Despite the softness in her voice, he could hear the edge. He knew she was picking at something, but he wasn't going to give in that easily.

"I just like to hang out with my friends, is that wrong?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Of course, Matthias could really care less, had he hung out with his friends or not. But it was an excuse to not be around Candice, which was good enough for him.

"When it interferes with our future, yes," Candice said.

Matthias shrugged, his eyes casting over Candice's head, where he watched Nicollette blush at something Tobias said. "As far as I'm concerned, our future doesn't exist. You're not what I want, and I think you know that."

The song ended after his harsh words. He pulled away, excusing himself to the drinks as Candice stared off at him in shock.

Nicollette stepped to the side with Tobias, kindly greeting anyone he brought her to. She was tired and already wanted to go home and get out of her dress. Her feet ached from the heels, and she swore she was getting a headache from the bright lights.

She'd avoided looking at Matthias. She hadn't spoken to him since the day he pulled her into the closet at church, and she had no intentions. Her feelings were already very confusing as is, and she knew how close he'd been to kissing her. How close she'd been to kissing him. 

Nicollette stared at her drink, droning out all sound. She was more than ready to go home, but any time she even began to suggest the idea to Tobias, he shot her down. 

"Share a dance?" A familiar voice asked.

Nicollette's eyes shot up, meeting Matthias' blue ones. She glanced around her as if he were talking to someone else. "W-what?"

"Dance with me, Lettie." He softly said.

Her eyes immediately began to search the room. Matthias noticed and quickly reached out to turn her cheek toward him. "Don't do that. I'm not asking you to sneak off and fuck. I'm asking a friend for a dance, like friends do at these things."

At his words, her cheeks reddened. She cleared her throat, "Matthias, I don't think that's a really-"

"Hello, Matthias." Tobias greeted, cutting her off.

"Hey, Tobias. Mind if I steal her for a quick dance?" Matthias asked, pointing toward Nicollette. 

"I don't mind at all." Tobias smiled a friendly smile, "I was just mingling anyway. I'll go give a greeting to Candice." He bowed politely before moving through the crowd.

Matthias - feeling victorious at getting Tobias to leave - looked back at Nicollette. His smile fell slightly, a look the girl couldn't describe on his face. "Say something," He said softly. "I don't like the silence."

"Isn't this a bit ridiculous?" She asked softly.

"The ball?" He asked, glancing around. "Yeah- yeah it's really stu-"

"No, Matthias." Nicollette quickly said, cutting him off. "This."

"This?" He asked, his brows pressed together. "What is this?"

"Exactly. What is this?" She repeated his words, barely motioning between the two of them.

Matthias pressed his lips together, "I just want a dance, Lettie. You look uncomfortable. And none of these shitheads might notice, but I do. Dance with me, and let me make you feel better."

"Just dancing?" She hesitantly asked.

"Just dancing," He repeated, nodding. 

Nicollette stared at him for a moment, unsure of what to say. Finally, she caved. She nodded, her eyelids fluttering as she exhaled. "Okay, fine. But just one."

Matthias grinned. It was a huge grin, one he couldn't seem to contain. He held his hand out just as a new song began to play, causing more couples to go to the middle of the ballroom to dance.

She took his hand, her stomach swarming with butterflies. She didn't show any reaction as he led her toward the dancefloor, keeping his pace slow so as not to make her trip in her heels. She held her dress up with one hand, the other wrapped around his arm.

Nicollette hated it. She hated how right this felt. She hated how she already felt a little more relaxed, despite still being in a big pink puffy dress with a bunch of people she didn't know or fit in with.

The crowd parted as Matthias led Nicollette onto the floor. People watched that weren't dancing - including both his and her parents. 

Matthias stopped, his arm easily wrapping around her waist to pull her closer. He was being greedy and he knew it, but he didn't care. He could easily use the excuse that he was dancing with her, like everyone was dancing with each other. But he wanted to be near her. He wanted to touch her, because he knew that eventually - this wouldn't happen. He'd be married off to Candice, and she'd court with Tobias, and they wouldn't be able to have any moments like this.

Nicollette's hands immediately went to his chest. She looked up at him, her breath catching as she saw that he was already looking down at her. He slowly used the hand that wasn't wrapped around her waist to grab one of her hands, holding it close. He didn't dare look at anyone else, not seeming to care that they were drawing maybe a little too much attention toward them.

It was silent between the two at first, Matthias studying her face. Then, a small smile covered his face.

"What?" Nicollette asked.

"This song just reminds me of that one movie," He said.

Nicollette stayed silent, listening to the song. The song playing was A Thousand Years. A choked laugh left her lips. "A-are you talking about Twilight, Matthias?"

"It's a good movie. Team Edward, by the way." He said, smiling as he saw her smile.

She laughed softly, "You're insufferable."

"And you're beautiful." He said without thinking.

Nicollette stopped laughing, her cheeks red. "What?" She asked.

"You're beautiful," He said again, a little louder than before. "The most beautiful person here, actually. Even if you're in a dress that is nothing like you."

"It's what my mom wanted," She said. "I didn't want it. It's pink."

"So?" Matthias asked.

"Pink's not really my color," She murmured.

Matthias stopped moving at this. He knew what she was saying - he remembered that day just as much as she had. It was the day Candice met Nicollette and insulted her in more ways than one. "Well, that's just not true," He quickly said, moving them again. "You're pretty. In pink, in blue, even in brown. And don't let Candice make you think otherwise. She's jealous."

"Jealous?" Nicollette couldn't help but laugh. "What would she be jealous of?"

"Because of the fact that you have my attention and she doesn't." He softly murmured.

Before she could even think of a response, his eyes glanced at the diamond necklace. "Nice necklace. Your boyfriend give it to you?"

"He's not my boyfriend," She snapped. "And yes."

"Of course he did," Matthias murmured. "You know they're not even as rare as people make them seem, right? Diamonds are easy to find. He could've tried way harder for your attention. Of course, you're you, so you don't care about money or wealth, but- but he definitely could have tried harder to win you over." 

"But he did something, and that's more than nothing." She said simply.

"Yeah, well, he didn't try hard enough." He said, scoffing.

"What, did you expect him to dig up a ruby?" Nicollette asked in disbelief.

Matthias quickly spun Nicollette before twirling her back to his chest. "I don't think you understand, Nicollette. A gem like you needs something more than a simple diamond. Almost every royal here has diamonds on. But you're not like them. You're far more... beautiful. Like Painite." 

"What's that?" Nicollette asked.

"It's the rarest gem in the world," He whispered. "Like... like you. And your look-a-like boyfriend would know that if he did his research and appreciated you."

"I'm sorry-" Nicollette chuckled, shaking her head. "Did you just call him my look-a-like boyfriend?"

"Yes, yes, I did." He nodded. "Funny, right?"

"No, not funny. We don't look like." She rolled her eyes.

"No, you look like siblings." He smiled. 

"I'm going to trip you," She threatened.

"That's a lot of talk coming from the clumsy one wearing heels. Remember when you fell for me?" He teased.

"I didn't fall for you," She quickly said.

"The scar right here says otherwise," He said, using his hand that held hers to brush against her cheekbone.

She drew in a sharp breath, trying to think of something clever to say. Before she could, however, someone clearing their throat broke the moment between them.

Nicollette hadn't even realized the song ended. She glanced over to see Matthias' aunt standing beside them, her hands clasped together behind her back. "Matthias," She said, not even looking at Nicollette.

Matthias pulled away. Nicollette felt a chill and stepped back, wrapping her arms around her stomach.

"Your fiancé is waiting for you," His aunt said, tilting her head. "You don't want to keep her waiting, do you?"

Matthias' face fell. He glanced at Nicollette before looking back at his aunt. "Right, yeah. I'm going." He softly said.

Without a word or even another glance toward Nicollette, he walked away. She watched after him with sad eyes, suddenly feeling tense again.

"You're in over your head," The sound of his aunt brought her from her thoughts.

"Excuse me?" She softly asked, looking over at his aunt.

"Thinking you even have a chance." She shook her head. "You're nothing but the help's daughter. You're nothing to this family or to this Kingdom. And knowing he's a taken man and still trying to manipulate him is sick. You're nothing but a cheap girl who needs to learn her place." 

Nicollette's eyes widened at her words. "Are you calling me-"

"I am, because that's what you are. My nephew might not see it, but I do. Now run along, and leave him alone. Don't ruin his future because you're selfish." She stuck her nose up before turning and walking away.

Tears pricked at Nicollette's eyes. She gripped the sides of her dress, her chest hurting from embarrassment and something else. Her eyes flickered over to where Matthias had walked off to. She saw him next to Candice, but his eyes were on her. 

A tear slipped down her cheek, and she quickly turned and walked through the crowd. She ignored Matthias' worried eyes, instead forcing herself through the crowd to look for someone - anyone. Tobias, her father, or even Brielle.

But she suddenly didn't know any of the faces surrounding her. She felt like a weight was pressed on her shoulders, and she didn't know what to do.

Glancing around, she turned and booked it through the door. She stumbled as she trampled into someone's chest, the person barely catching them before she fell to the floor.

"Whoa-" The voice said, "N-Nicollette?"

Atlas stood in front of her, his brows pressed together. He gripped her shoulders, putting one hand over her forehead. "Are you okay?"

"Take me home," She breathed out, unable to speak any louder. "Please. I- I need to leave."

Atlas glanced around. He looked over at Alayna, who'd been standing next to him with Andrew on the other side of her. She stared in shock, her arm tightly linked with Andrew's. He sent her an apologetic look before looking back down at Nicollette.

"Come on, Nic. Let's get you home."

++

Long chapter to make up for being gone for over a month <3 Dress up top is hers if you couldn't tell lol I don't own the pic