Chapter 15 ~ means something to me

"Hello, Serra?"

"Zoya? Hey, everything alright?"

"Actually not, your mum came she was here to check on you and the Sir at the office"

"Big Sir?"

"Yes Vishal Sir, he told that you went to your home for the vacation as you know that's what you said about where you were going to during the holidays..." She trailed while I turned numb, color draining off my face.

"My mother came there you-you sure about that?" I asked anxiously.

"Yeah, well she was talking to the teachers and then she talked to me too by the way your mom was pretty much cool about it looks like she too is aware of how lying is your second nature. Though, I am kinda upset you lied saying you were going to your home! And then you are somewhere having more fun than me. I am here completing worksheets day and night! Couldn't you even make room for two of us? Just this much was our friendship?"

I rubbed my forehead all the lies were coming back at me now,"I am at my home not technically but in my hometown and my mother..well..." She's probably storing her energy to cross examine me about my secret venture.

"You are again lying all you speak is only lies! Do I even really know you? These six months feel like I was friends with someone else someone different and better than a liar!" She hung up. I winced staring at my mobile which flashed another incoming call and I knew who it was.

I answered, bracing myself,

"You are coming home?" my mother actually stated.

"Yes" I nodded, lifelessly.

•
•
•

"What's the cause of full stop on our today's plan?" Faisal asked for the umpteenth time from the backseat. I ignored him by looking at the window as Dhruv sped through. I told them I needed to go to Home Asap; it was an emergency.

Thankfully, Dhruv didn't question more about the cause or the need to. I couldn't grasp my mind around anything right now than the current situation. How did I land myself to this point? Oh God why am I such a big loser? Every step, every decisions I have made till now has only been so wrong that I can't stop feeling like I am getting trapped in my own web,....

I shook my legs as I thought of a way to get out of this rather than disliking myself. But, why do I feel I was becoming a bad person? I had lied before but it never backfired in this way it never made me feel this.... worse and horrible.

Zoya ...oh God she's been nothing but a good friend to me, from the time when I joined the institute regardless of my cold deceptive attitude, she had helped me in acquainting with things around when I was new, tried to know me and what did I do in return lied to her about everything?

I drew a breath when again I realised I was no better than Sahil. We both were building relationships on lies.

I laid my head back tiredly against the seat, my eyes landed on Dhruv behind the wheels. Gotta admit he did look badass and in a way...hot?

I shook my head nice try mind to distract myself.

Dhruv narrowed his eyes at me. I immediately looked away fearing he caught me staring at him.

I noticed the familiar neighborhood of my house through the window and then I froze oh god I can't do this! Not right now!

"U- turn!" I yelled.

Dhruv in response raised his eyebrow.

"I am serious" I told.

"You know what I think? You are out of your mind" he said.

Faisal piped up,"seriously Serra! What's with you? Tell us maybe we can act like we can help you"

I chewed on my lip, thinking what to do.

"Your problem is overthinking, just do it what's on your mind!" Dhruv told irritatedly pulling the brakes after finding a correct spot.

"Yep!" Faisal agreed looking distracted using his mobile then he put it down and both of them looked at me expectedly.

I felt pressurised like they were poking it out of me to speak what I want. I blurted, "I want to go to the institution"

Faisal frowned in confusion and as for Dhruv without any further ado he took a swift U turn and drove us like the cars in fast and furious.

•
•

I stepped out from the car literally all the thoughts and worries were chased away by the big concern whether I would make out alive after this hella ride.

I held the door to gather myself before getting to the main entrance of the institute.

"I am not going inside it will be a chaos if they find the institution's heartthrob is back again" Faisal informed, rolling the glass down of the window, he was busy playing games on his mobile so didn't look least concern or interested to know why I wanted to come here suddenly.

Dhruv at the passenger seat glanced at me,"15 minutes" he told.

I leaned on the opened window putting my arms on it, not understanding what he meant. "What?"

He rolled his eyes, "15 minutes and I will be off, the drive to here is like five hours you think I will waste more time on you Ms. Newton?"

I stifled a smile bubbling on my lips I wanted to say you already did it but anyway he had to maintain his tough boy kinda personality so I nodded understanding, "thank you"

It was comical how surprised he looked expecting me to fight with him or just get riled up by his rude attitude.

"Thank you" I said again found myself smiling when he continued looking at me clueless as if he had no idea what he was doing and why?. He turned away appearing flustered he fixed his hair awkwardly,
" whatever" he mumbled.

I turned around with a light chuckle then seriousness of the situation dawn on me. I walked towards the campus of the building then got in through the doors of the main entrance for the dormitory.

•
And,

Once again ladies and gentlemen we were back to the episode two of staring at the door.

I stared at the door of my friends, Zoya's room till my eyes watered and I wiped off the tears forgetting to blink my eyes. It was 15 minutes and 34 seconds around and if Dhruv was true to his words he must've left me already.

"Serra?" Said a voice from behind when I bumped on shifting back. I turned snapping out it spotting Nadia from across the hallway. I forgot she had her dorm room upstairs in this hallway, she stared at me puzzled then scoffed,"back from your holidays? Realised that marks won't be scored by spending holidays but by actually studying. Happy realisation Serra!" she taunted.

I looked away ignoring her knocking on Zoya's door finally. Going inside looked now less bad than staying here.

"Come in" Zoya said.

I opened the door and got in.

"Maybe, Serra is deaf also now,"Nadia muttered from behind bending to get something. I wanted to punch her but took a deep breath and stepped inside.

Zoya's head snapped up from where she sat on the bed crossed legs with a book in her lap.

"Hey" I said lowly.

Her big eyes widened, surprised then hurt flashed in them, she gazed down at the book in her lap dismissing me.

"Hi Serra!" Greeted another voice

I turned my head to its source, Ehaan on a chair right against the opposite wall he waved at me with a pen in his hand

"Hey, Ehaan" I said grinning at him involuntarily, it was hard not to looking at him.

His curly hair was a mess and that cute face had ink mark on his cheek. He always had those on his face cause he dozed off while solving equations on his writings.

"What did I say don't talk to her!" Zoya hissed at him reminding.

Ehaan made an oops face and gave me an apologetic look,"Sorry, Serra, I take my hey back"

I nodded smiling, "no problem"

Zoya was glaring at him I moved coming between them before the poor guy suffered because of me,"listen, Zoya I am sorry I know I have been a very bad friend and I can't say anything but ...that" I struggled with words. I was so bad at expressing myself that my defense mechanism of lying or running away rose. "I am really sorry," I said really feeling it I gazed down. She didn't know that she really means something to me. At this point, where I lost some real important people in my life and had never really stepped forward like ever to come out of my shell and socialize, to know more people. On top of that the trust issues and other, a few unknown issues have only made the matter worse.I don't want to surrender myself to them completely, I don't want to lose more people in my life at least not those, who meant well for me.

"I only wanted you to be honest with me Serra, and no matter how big of a liar you are, I always saw you as a good person you made notes for me when I was sick, you helped me in sneaking out! you literally were the only one who believed me when Nadia falsely accused me for stealing!...and you are even sometimes shockingly fun to be around. And then after all of it I still feel you don't trust me.... I don't have many friends I don't connect to everyone but I chose to be open with you, I always considered you as some...you know as a real friend in my life so it hurts when one don't receive the same from the other side and it makes them feel like maybe it is their own fault, they somehow deserved that treatment" she said her eyes welling up she dragged them down back to the book.

I sniffed, "I will be honest with you, I swear. I didn't rush off literally took 5 hours journey to here for like nothing you mean something to me too!. You are the most genuine person I have ever known so don't you even think you deserve a liar friend like me."

"Okay maybe I should leave" Ehaan suggested awkwardly glancing at the two girls almost near bursting into tears.

"No, you also stay there you deserve equally to know what's going on in my life" I told looking at him.

He was baffled pointing at himself, "I?"

"No, the lamp on the table idiot" Zoya said chuckling rubbing her eyes.

"Oh" Ehaan looked back at the lamp and appeared more confused now.

"It is not your fault you are oblivious by nature, Ehaan but you deserve to know my secret as much as Zoya" I clarified wanted to tell him because I knew Zoya would tell him eventually she can't keep anything from him and, he couldn't bother to look more helpless now.

"Secret, you have a secret Serra?" Ehaan asked in disbelief.

Zoya groaned, "everybody has a secret Ehaan!"

"But won't it not be a secret if she tells us?" Ehaan trying to be logical.

Zoya asked politely, "honey, you keep quiet or get out"

He nodded quickly zipping his lips.

"Okay guys this is very hard for me but I feel ...I don't know weird that I am gonna confess it out for the first time ... it is actually very weird but in a good way which makes it double weird and I am babbling now..." I rambled clasping a hand to my mouth..

Ehaan and Zoya appeared tense seeing my state.

Zoya got up then pulled me in making me sit down on the bed,"no pressure, if it is that big secret you don't have to tell, Serra you came all the way and that already means a lot to me" she reassured me patting on my rigid shoulder trying to ease the tension.

"Yep, no worries, I mean I am freaked out like you gonna confess something bizzare like you are a transgender-

Zoya shot him a dangerous look.

"You gotta admit there are some real hot...I mean good looking transgender it is hard to differentiate" he admitted sheepishly.

Zoya too looked at me suspiciously from up to down like really considering Ehaan's point.

"Ehaan, I am not transgender!" I scolded him.

"Umm-okay I was just guessing"

Zoya growled, "hun, if you can't keep quiet then just leave!"

"I thought you would never ask me, I am leaving already the testosterone level is suffering a major setback in this room" he muttered.

"You can't leave!" Zoya said, annoyed.

"Ohkay?? then what do you want me to do? Babes" Ehaan grumbled.

"You just sit down and keep quiet is it really too much to ask of you?"

"I won't have come to your room if I knew this would happen" he mumbled incoherently.

But we heard him.

"So you are saying you don't like my company?" Zoya frowned.

"Guys guys, settle down I am here with a big confession let me do that before I lost my nerve" I said, loudly over them.

They looked at me tentatively, "okay don't shout and don't judge me I have reasons for that-

"Godddd you are scaring me Serra! Are you like some spy from Pakistan or something?" Ehaan spoke nervously. "I don't know if I could support that, I have watched Razi and country comes first!"

Zoya glanced at me nervously taking even a step back.

I facepalmed,"Ehaan let me speak okay? I am not an undercover agent or an alien! Or anything you are thinking about!"

"I am listing every possibilities you know how a mathematician's mind works? Next possibility, is you are robot and somehow escaped 'I am not a robot test' or a ghost whom only we could see or a suicide bomber or-

"WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! I told you to stop watching sci fi movies so much to the point you go crazy!" Zoya yelled at him, "and you are making me nervous too!"

"I second that, I will just say it right now I guess it's my fault stretching it like that Oh...so umm. I am Selena. Like the legit one, with my mobile being the sole evidence of it " I said. I literally said aloud to them.

Both stared at me, puzzled.

"Selena Gomez?" Ehaan asked. "I don't think so you are Selena Gomez I have seen her and she looks different I mean unless you have got a surgery oh my god! You had a surgery!-

"Shut up dumbo! Can't believe you are dating that tubelight Zoya!" complaint someone by the door our heads snapped to them.

It was Nadia with the mobile raised. She popped the chewing gum bubble getting aside from the door frame she was hiding behind the wall from outside then she put down her mobile and flashed my mobile from behind her back, "I found this in the hallway you dropped when you bumped to me it has no lock just my luck!,"she said smirking, "I always knew there was something suspicious about you Serra" she corrected eyeing me," or should I say Selena? Can't wait to be the first one to expose you"

My eyes widened I shook myself out of stupor and ran to get her but she was quick she hurried down the hallway with the mobile in her hand. I chased her and heard running steps from behind I saw Zoya too accompanying me with Ehaan behind heaving.

I looked at her, will that secret break our friendship?

She answered me loudly, "what are you looking at me? Catch that bitch before she lets everyone know about it! We can't let that happen not after she called my boyfriend tubelight only I am allowed to call him!" Zoya ran with full speed angrily passing by me while I stared in awe.

Ehaan jogged shooting me thumbs up, "don't worry, I am gonna take a short cut from that way so we won't let her get away that easily not with my girlfriend hot on her tails and of course with this taser made by me oh man I was so looking to test it on someone !" He flashed excitedly a small taser then ran the other way around like a mad scientist.

I stared at my friends and for the first time understood what it really meant having them.

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